Child Loss

Motherhood Shaped Me (Joni E.)

Bonnie (SOAM) Before Pregnancy, Belly, Child Loss, Four or More Pregnancies, Mom over 30, Postpartum, Pregnant, Submissions 16 Comments

~Age: 36 years old
~Pregnancies: 5 pregnancies/4 living children (one fetal demise at 21 weeks)
~Childrens ages: 15, 12, 10 and 5 weeks

Highest non-pregnant weight: 183
Weight 3 months prior to pregnancy (lowest adult weight): 125 (I put on 20 lbs before becoming pregnant at my husbands request)
Weight just prior to pregnancy: 144
Weight at time of delivery: 195
Weight now: 167

My story begins 16+ years ago with the loss of my first precious baby. I had difficulty becoming pregnant and was devastated when I lost the pregnancy at 21 weeks. I always appreciated my body and was thrilled when I became pregnant again. I was surprised when my doctor mentioned my stretchmarks being so bad. The grew and grew until they reached the top of my belly. After my daughter was born I was alarmed at the way my body looked. I didn’t recognize my belly anymore. My breast were large and sagging but I was so grateful to have her I didn’t care. I eventually began to realize and then somewhat resent that I couldn’t get my pre-pregnant body back.

Fast forward 4 years and 2 more children. Once the children were older and I had more time to focus on myself I began to really be critical of my body. I was going to school full time to become a RN and working as well. I was eating poorly and not exercising. I was unhappy with myself and my life. Once I graduated nursing school I weighed the most I’d ever weighed at 183. I lost 60 pounds and began marathon training and working out in excess. I was pushing myself to the limit, at one point even breaking my leg and continuing to run despite the pain. I was very proud of my new physique, yet when I looked in the mirror I could see flaw after flaw. Before my breasts were saggy, now they were small. Before my tummy was fat, now wrinkled. I took a step back to evaluate my life and realized the answer was not to be found on the scale or in the gym but in myself.

I changed my life completely. I separated from my husband and then reunited with a man I had known since 6th grade. We fell very deeply in love and quickly began a relationship. We decided to have a baby. He requested that I gain weight prior to becoming pregnant as he felt I was too thin. I had to agree. We became pregnant very quickly and enjoyed my pregnancy. He loved my pregnant body. I gained 50 pounds during the pregnancy. I’d occasionally fear the weight I’d have to lose after the birth but I enjoyed my body and what it was doing in a way I never had before. He and I decided to have our baby at home, something I had wanted to do with my 3 previous births but did not have a supportive spouse to help make that possible. I gave birth in a birth tub in our kitchen, surrounded by people I loved. It was the best day of my life. Ella weighed a huge, healthy 10 lbs and 6 oz. Her birth empowered me in a way I had never felt empowered before. I felt strong, capable and beautiful (her long birth story can be found here).

Now 5 weeks after her birth I love this sweet baby more than I can describe. And I respect my body in a whole new way but I don’t recognize it in the mirror. I have huge 38DD breasts again and my tummy is back to looking like it did when I had my third baby (10 years ago). I worked so incredibly hard for the shape I had before I became pregnant with Ella, to the point of obsession. It was difficult to admit that my happiness did not depend on if I wore a size 14 (my current size) or a size 4. But yet in these first weeks PP I told my husband I felt like I needed to look like I did before this birth because if I did not it was like false advertising. After all, he didn’t marry 167 pound me. What he said really made me pause to appreciate myself: He said, ” I wish when you looked at yourself you could see what I see. You are so sexy. You are beautiful. Inside and out. I love your body. It made our baby. I love you and just want you to love yourself too.” And I believe him and I do love myself.

We are so pressured by society to look a certain way. We’ve been conditioned to believe that beauty is skin deep. We feel like if we were a certain size or weight we’d be happy. We feel like we need to have plastic surgery to get “back to the way we were” before having babies. Fix our breasts. Fix our bellies. Fix ourselves. When we are not in fact broken. What we should be doing is celebrating and appreciating the amazing things are bodies do to make our babies and that we can make babies at all!

I’m so proud of all the women on SOAM willing to bare their bodies and souls for the sake of truth and beauty.

Photos included:
1. Pre-pregnancy after losing 50 pounds on WW (me in the stripes, my baby sister in the hearts)
2. at 37 weeks pregnant with my husband
3. smiling in labor at 40 weeks 5 days (tie dye sarong)
4. Us at our wedding (me 36 weeks pregnant)
5. Ella at 3 weeks
6/7/8. me now 5 weeks PP front/back/side

I Was Afraid (Susan)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Child Loss, Four or More Pregnancies, Postpartum, Submissions 11 Comments

I Was Afraid, Susan
Age: 36
Pregnancies: 6
Births: 3
Children: Nicholas 7, Ella 5, Jack 3

I took these pictures for my blog. I took them to show the world, well the blog world, my post babies belly. I contemplated for literally an hour. I should, I shouldn’t. Ok I am, no no I can’t. Ultimately I was unable to share the pictures because I felt ashamed of my body. I had 3 miscarriages before finally conceiving and delivering my first baby. As all moms who have had trouble conceiving or staying pregnant know, this was not a happy time in life. So what did do to make myself feel better? I ate. 4 years and 3 breastfed babies, and one cesarean later my body had seen better days. I decided to take my body back for myself, after all there would be no more babies. My body was my own again and I deserved to treat it right. I have been consistently working out for over 2.5 years yet I’m still ashamed of my body. I don’t have stretch marks and no one sees my scar but I am still striving for that airbrushed look. When I saw this forum to show my pictures I figured why not. It’s me, it’s real and it’s the only body I’ve got. I better learn to love it.

Hoping for a Miracle (Michelle)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Cesarean, Child Loss, Four or More Pregnancies, Postpartum, Pregnant, Submissions, Update 8 Comments

Age: 25
Pregnancies: 5 (3 miscarriages, 1 a set of twins) Births: 1
Age of children: almost three, 6 weeks pregnant

Growing up I was never sure if I wanted children. I was not sure if I had the patience. I met my husband my freshman year of college. We dated for about 7 months and we found out we were pregnant. We were shocked. My first appointment I was told I was only about 4 weeks along – all we saw was a yolk sac. At my next appointment (4 weeks later) There was a fetal pole, it was measuring 6 weeks, but I was told not to be concerned by the discrepancy. Fast forward three weeks and I started cramping and spotting. A trip to the emergency room later I was told I was miscarrying. They gave me pain medicine, sent me home, and scheduled a D&C. The next day I was back in the emergency room. They hospitalized me while I passed “the embryonic tissues.” Two months later me and my husband married. Three months flew by and we decided to start trying to get pregnant. My first appointment was fine, they tested by hcg levels over 4 days and they were increasing as they should… 2 weeks later, another miscarriage. We decided that we were going to wait to try to get pregnant again. One night, one thing led to another and we did not use any protection. Thank god. Because 9 months later our beautiful baby girl was born. I had an interesting pregnancy. I have type 1 diabetes (juvenile onset, insulin dependent), had extra amniotic fluid through much of my pregnancy (which I would like to think contributed to the 70 lbs I gained – lol), and went into premature labor twice (due to the abnormally small size of my uterus and the stress from the extra amniotic fluid). I ended up having a “non-emergency emergency c-section” (yes you are reading that right – that is how the doctor referred to it) after our daughters heart rate dropped multiples time during my induction. Our daughter was in the special care nursery for 4 hours before they would let me see her (her oxygen levels were low due to a hold in her heart). Four days later (after my daughter was treated for jaundice) we were released from the hospital. The hole in her heart healed on its own and she is thriving. She is now a rowdy 3 year old red head (she has the temper to match). Recently me and my husband decided we should try for another baby. Five months ago We found out I was pregnant. We were ecstatic. Two weeks later, I miscarried – a set of twins. Heartbreak. Two weeks ago, I found out I am pregnant. Evidently I don’t have a problem getting pregnant – just staying pregnant. I am now 6.5 weeks pregnant. I had an ultrasound two days ago and we saw a heartbeat. I am scared as hell, but already in love with this tiny baby inside of me. Here’s hoping for another miracle!

picture 1: me 32 weeks pregnant with my daughter
picture 2: our beautiful baby girl
picture 3-5: me today, almost 3 years postpartum and 6.5 weeks pregnant.

Updated here.

Being a Super Mom (Bree K)

Bonnie (SOAM) Before Pregnancy, Belly, Child Loss, Four or More Pregnancies, Postpartum, Pregnant, Submissions, Twins 9 Comments

Pregnancies: 6
Births: 3
Children: Twins 3 & a baby 2 months

I know there are many women on here. You come from all walks of life. However there are two things we have in common… we are unhappy or saddened by our bodies and we love our children.
Being a mother at a young age (20) I gave birth to twins a boy and girl (Johnathan & Allison.) After trying for so long to have a baby god blessed us with two. Now going on 4 yrs. this Christmas they have been my life. After having the twins I was very insecure with my body and didn’t’ find myself attractive… sound familiar ladies? So what I did was have my hubby take pictures of me, to see what I look like threw his eyes. It worked. I felt amazing after I saw the pictures and I realized that I wasn’t suppose to be ashamed of my body, but embrace it. It was after all what I prayed to god for. He gave me what I dreamed of. I know that it’s difficult to look in the mirror and think to yourself, “Wow I have a kick ass body.” Let’s face it ladies, there are very few of us who can do that.

After just having my second son, (Zach) on Aug. 2-10, I have been working my butt off to lose weight. I only gained 10 pounds with him and I gained 8 with the twins. After I had my twins I thought to myself that I missed my smooth skin, the non Freddy Couger look that I carry around my stomach now. But I was so thankful to have them, it no longer mattered. That is until my clothes were off. Here I am three kids later and I know that my tummy will always look like a nightmare. However there are things we can do about the looks. For many of us we cannot afford tummy tucks or breast lifts…. but here are a few helpful hints to get that new mama body back into shape. For those of us who are blessed with the breastfeeding boobies, I have found that push ups work wonders for giving our girls a lift. The tummy, well that’s a little harder. I’m still working on that one myself, but I have found that running, biking and a combo of other exercises do help decrease the flabbiness of the tummy and underarms, (batwings.)

Our children are what drives us to be better, what not let our husbands, boyfriends be the reason to get back into shape? That is what is driving me. I want to look better and feel sexy in my own skin. It’s time we got used to our new bodies and embrace them. I’m a bigger lady and I wear my skin with pride… on most days… think of stretch marks as battle scares of motherhood. The belly bulge as a reminder that you carried a human being for months and you brought him/her/them into this world healthy. You did that. Be proud mama, you deserve a little happiness. Next time you go into a public place, take a look around you. Look at the women. Today’s world is changing. There are many of us out there who are feeling the same way, but if you look closely you can see that we are the real women… not the women the public wants us to be. We are mothers and as such, we should embrace it. Be proud to be a mama and our bodies that our little ones gave us. I truly hope this post helps some of you, that this gives you ambition, hope and inspiration. I’m attaching some pictures of pre-pregnancy and post par tum along with my three children.

I Made Them and They Made Me (Tanya Rose)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Cesarean, Child Loss, Four or More Pregnancies, Mom over 30, Pregnant, Submissions 8 Comments

There was a time when I pranced around no bigger than a minute and cute as a button. Then at 15 years old, I became pregnant with my first son. I was 92 lbs. and throughout my pregnancy I was forced to gain weight by my Dr. because I was “underweight”. I did as I was instructed and gained 46 lbs. Little me delivered a 9lb.baby boy via c-section. I bounced back quickly and after 9 months, I was 93 lbs. and expecting baby boy number two. At 17, I vaginally delivered my 10 lb. baby boy.

After, the c-section and getting so big with my 10 lb. baby, my 17 year old body was shot. At 17, this is not the way your body was supposed to look. Although, I lost my weight, my body was stretched and saggy. Life went on, but I was always self conscious about my body image.

Years later, I was in a relationship with the man that I married. We were expecting an oopsie in January 2001. It took me having to bury my son at 17 weeks gestation and a late miscarriage one year later, for me to say to myself that these babies are too precious to worry about body image. I would give anything to just have a baby. I no longer cared what my body looked like or what aches and pains I would endure, I just wanted a baby. Three weeks after my D&C, I was expecting my 4th son. I had another miscarriage after him and then I was expecting my 5th son. After mine and my husbands divorce, we were expecting once again, another oopsie, number 6. Our after divorce relationship only lasted until my 6th son was 3 weeks old. Divorces are always for a reason.

Six boys later, eight pregnancies later, I was single and my body image was once again an issue. What man in his right man would want a woman with so much luggage and an after baby body like mine?
I found him when I wasn’t looking. He has five children himself. Even with his encouragement about the fact that my body was just fine. I still wanted to lose weight, I even bought myself a breast augmentation. I knew that the new and improved boobies would divert attention away from my mid-section.

Three and a half years later we are expecting a baby any time now. Someone on my pregnancy forum posted your site. It was the most wonderful thing I have seen. SOAM opened my eyes again and widely this time. A mother’s body is beautiful. It’s not airbrushed, it’s real. I realized that I am left with the marks that show I am blessed and that my body is able to do the most amazing thing in existence, Create life. I have a new found love for my body. I know there are many women who would sacrifice anything to have a family and it is just not possible for them. Therefore, I am grateful.

I am 30 yrs. old
This is my 9th pregnancy, 7th birth
The ages of my children are, 14, 12, deceased 8-10-00, 8,6, soon to be 4, and baby due 10.22.10

I can not wait to share postpartum pictures.

Thank you for everything, especially this site.

Update (Babs)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Cesarean, Cesarean Scar and/or Incision, Child Loss, Four or More Pregnancies, Postpartum, Pregnant, Submissions, Tattoo, Update 22 Comments

Previous entries here, here and here.

When my first son died, shortly after birth, I found too late that the only prints I’d been given from the hospital staff were barely worth calling prints… they didn’t even try to unfold his fingers before taking them, and even inked his knuckles rather than take the extra effort to create something memorable. I had been hoping for something clear and beautiful, but when they handed me the papers, I was devastated.
He left no marks on my body other than an ugly and unnecessary cesarean scar: I had no stretch marks or permanent weight gain, I was longing for something physical to remember him by. I wanted a tattoo of his hand in the place where it had been pressing throughout my pregnancy… but due to the condition of the prints, I didn’t know if this would ever happen.

It’s taken me years of canvasing tattoo artists to find one that was capable of not only reconstructing a good print, but also skilled enough to capture the finer details of it.

With the help of my best friend, who took prints from her newborn daughter to give a template to work from, I took the papers to a new artist in town with an amazing skill in details and shadows. She gave me a perfect copy of the size and shape of his palm… not only that, but she painstakingly worked his palm lines (the only part of his prints that was truly preserved) into the tattoo.

So here’s my fourth submission: about 1.5 months pregnant with baby number four, carrying the extra 20lbs from my last two pregnancies, covered in faded stretch marks, an ugly cesarean scar from an unnecessary surgery I still haven’t recovered from, and finally graced with a mark from my first son’s life.

Unhappy With Body!! (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Before Pregnancy, Belly, Child Loss, Postpartum, Submissions 14 Comments

23 years old
1st pregnancy miscarried at 10 weeks. currently 32 weeks with 2nd pregnancy

First off I found this site somehow when I was researching information on stretchmarks and I am soooo glad that I did. But anyway I don’t want to sound like I am complaining because I am so happy and blessed that I am expecting and everything is going great and I have a healthy baby growing inside me, nothing matters more than that to me but I am starting to get depressed with my body changes and I am almost disgusted with my body that I don’t even like to look at it anymore let alone allow my husband. Every time i get a shower now i shut and lock the door because I don’t want him just walking in and seeing me completly naked in the light, im just sick of hiding the way i really look under my clothing for my own husband, he knows how I feel and he says it doesn’t matter that he loves me no matter what and i will always look good to him but I don’t see that so it’s hard for me to believe. I wander is he just saying that to make me feel better and don’t want to hear me complaining all the time? that’s how I feel anyhow. I am just so young only 23 years old and I have always been very slim weighing around 110-115 at 5’2”. Never had any issues with my weight in my life. And now I am 32 weeks pregnant weighing at 142 with stretch marks growing by the day. I think it’s more the stretch marks that bother me then the weight I have gained. I can work and try to lose that after he is born but the stretch marks will be there forever. They started early on my breasts at around 3 months then started on my hips, thighs and butt around 6 months. and now they are on my inner thighs and still growing, i can’t even wear shorts anymore in public. My butt is covered as well! The only place that I don’t have them is my belly, but i still have 8 weeks left =(

also cellulite everywhere! it’s just something I am always thinking about and how I am never going to look or feel the way I used to. It doesn’t help when you see people that you don’t see everyday and they are like omg you got huge! I just want to break down and cry when someone says that to me, and to be honest I have. I like this site because I know I am not the only one that feels this way and I see other young women on here and to me everyone I know that have a baby and are my age are in a bikini a few months later and look amazing. That makes me sick because I am so jealous because that wont be me. thanks for listening

pics 1.) inner thigh marks 2. & 3.) 32 weeks (now) 4.) at 6 months 5. & 6.) pre pregnancy

I Think I’ve Always Wanted to Pose Nude (K. Marie)

Bonnie (SOAM) Abortion/Life after Abortion, Belly, Breasts, Butt, Child Loss, Mom over 30, Postpartum, Submissions 11 Comments

When most little girls were dreaming of marrying prince charming, or planning their weddings and the names of their future children, I had one goal in mind: I wanted to be physically supernatural, beautiful and virtually unbreakable. I didn’t play school or dress-up or house. I pretended I was a cartoon character: Cheetara, from the Thundercats show. Why Cheetara? Because she was everything I wasn’t — thin, muscular, acrobatic and tough. She could fight or escape her enemies, and she had a team of friends to help her.

In the real world, I was alone. A single child to neglectful, selfish parents. A student in a small, rural country school where I was often the only girl among several boys. I was a binge-eater starting at the age of 5 (to self-medicate the pain of my childhood), so I was chubby most of my young years. I hit puberty very young, growing noticeable breasts by 9 and having a mother too out of touch to support me and help me to dress properly. I was simultaneously leered at and ridiculed by everyone — family, adult friends of my parents, peers.

I was ashamed, and despite many great things about myself, the only thing that mattered was my appearance.

It wasn’t until I was pregnant that things changed. Actually, it was when I was giving birth. That was the first time in my life that I remember feeling like my body and my accomplishments were working in harmony, not one despite the other.

I can’t say that feeling has lasted. I alternate between comfortable confidence, detached apathy and gut-wrenching frustration. I still binge-eat. I still am measured by my appearance when around my own family (maybe that’s not the only measure, but it is always a topic of discussion and it stings as much as it always did). I still reject my husband’s very generous and genuine adoration, thinking not that he’s being insincere, but that his standards are too low.

But today I thought I’d be brave. I’m not Cheetara (I tried to be a few years ago when I joined an online community of folks trying to fix their lives through diet and exercise). I am, however, a very kind and open woman who sees beauty in all bodies but my own. So here I am.

Age: 32
Pregnancies: 4 (one terminated, two births (ages 7.5 and 3.5), one miscarriage at 8 weeks)
Time spent breastfeeding: 4 months with oldest child, 7 months with youngest — breast size (happily) shrunk after

The Life of My Belly (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Abortion/Life after Abortion, Child Loss, Mom over 30, No Photos (Story Only), Postpartum, Submissions 2 Comments

I’m 31 and have had 2 abortions and 1 miscarriage – no children. All years apart and all for the best…. and still I find myself looking at my belly, that carried the life I was expecting to meet, someone I already loved. I wonder if it’s strange that it’s two years later, and I am still the same size and shape I was when I was pregnant. I know there is a part of me who is waiting to meet my baby, I also know there is no baby to meet. We were engaged… almost.. I said yes, but didn’t want to make it official until I met his parents… we were planning the trip… and a few months later – pregnant. I was excited, felt lucky, felt loved… then, he cheated on me… things unraveled and I had a miscarriage… it was an abrupt end to so many things…

I know now like I didn’t know before that I want to be a mother. And in the process of deep grieving and now deep healing, I know my soul better than I did 2 years ago, or rather I listen to my soul and respect my emotions more than I did. The ways I changed in looking forward to being a mother stayed with me, and I found with in me a mother’s voice and mother’s heart…. comforting, soothing, and nurturing all the wounded and neglect parts of myself. I used to think the goal was to lose the belly… the 25 pounds.. and I would know that part of me didn’t want to, because part of me was still wanting to grow, for this life I loved to grow… and when the belly was gone I would know it was all over…

Still ‘chubby’… still carrying my belly… I see all the things that grew in me when life stopped – a deeper self acceptance… speak softly to myself… reflect kindly… meditate earnestly… love deeper…

I turned 31 and suddenly noticed this “mother consciousness” and realized that this was a gift for me… a strong and comforting voice that has been growing in me. That will be with me, even if I lose this belly.

My struggle, the stretch marks are totally worth it (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Before Pregnancy, Belly, Child Loss, Pregnant, Submissions, Third Pregnancy, Update 8 Comments

I have an incompetent cervix. This means that my cervix opens way too soon, resulting in a miscarriage or stillbirth. My first pregnancy I lost at 9 weeks when the baby was discovered to have passed away. My second pregnancy I lost at 4 months, when my water broke and I was dilating. The baby was already on her way out, so I had to deliver. At this point.. no diagnosis was made. They said it was a fluke, and no mention of a cervical condition was made.

When I found out I was pregnant again, needless to say, I was terrified. All I could think is “What if it happens again?”. I was very cautious, and so was my doctor. Every little pain I felt I made sure I was checked out. At around 18 weeks I was feeling some strange pressure, so being the nervous mama that I was, I went to the ER. The ER docs checked me out. They did a manual exam which concluded that my cervix was still closed. I was relieved. They decided to call my on call doc to let him know what was going on and then they were going to release me. I was sitting in the exam room waiting, quite relieved that everything appeared to be OK. Then, the on-call doc walked in. He just happened to be in the hospital, and given my history he decided to check me out himself. He did another exam and said that my cervix was closed but felt a little bit soft and not like that of a woman who has never given birth at term. He took me up to L&D. I started to get a little nervous but figured he was just being cautious. He did a transvaginal ultrasound and found that my cervix was serverely funneled (opening from the inside out) and very short. Usually this happens when you’re going into labor, but in my case.. it was just happening. I cried, got dizzy, almost passed out. The doctor was very kind and explained what could be done and that all hope was not lost. I decided to go home that night, and call my own doc in the morning. I truley believe that the on call doc being there was a miracle. If it wasn’t for him, I would have lost this baby too.

The next morning my doctor had called me. He had my report to a local women’s only hospital. The High Risk specialists there were awesome. They confirmed that my cervix was indeed dilating and short. They then set me up for an emergency cerclage. A cerclage is a stitch placed in the cervix to hold it closed and keep the baby in for as long as possible. They admitted for the night, and the procedure was set for the morning. I was TERRIFIED!! I barely slept all night long. I cried the whole time I was wating to go into surgery. There are risks to the procedure (breaking of the water, infection etc) and I just wanted to bad for my baby to be OK. Turned out, the procedure wasn’t so bad. I was awake for it, but was given a Spinal Anesthetic so I couldnt feel a thing. It was over in about 30 minutes.. and then I was sent to recovery. I had some cramping but was doing OK, so they sent me home that night.

At first, I was scared to even move out of my bed. I was taken out of work and was told to stay at home and relax for the most part. I wasn’t on bedrest persay but I was still terrified of doing anything to mess things up.

Ok, fast forward to now. Every since the placement of the cerclage my cervix has been being very good! The funneling has resolved and my cervix actually gained length. I am now 31 weeks, and the baby is doing great!! He kicks me all the time and I love it. Some days I sit here and watch my belly move all around.. It’s so cool :) No one had even expected me to make this far. But here I am.. still doing great. No signs of labor or anything. I am so thrilled.

What’s funny is that once things started to look up and I started to get a lot less nervous.. I started looking at the changes in my body. My belly really started to pop right out at around 28 weeks. I am short (5’2) and I am all belly it seems. I have only gained about 15-16 lbs during this pregnancy but I still have a lot of stretch marks. They are running all across my belly and sides. I was depressed about them for a while, but when I mentioned it to my boyfriend he just looked me funny. He said “Babe, all this time you’ve been so worried over this baby and now you’re worrying about something as superficial as those stretch marks? I’d love you if you were covered in them. Don’t worry so much!”. He was right. How could I worry about such a thing? They are my mommy marks. Proof of what I’ve overcome to make it this far with my little one. Don’t get me wrong.. I still constantly use creams and lotions on my belly.. but I am not depressed about it. I can worry about my body later. For now, I just want to get this baby into the world safe and sound. I worked so hard at this.. I refuse to let such a silly thing get to me. I have included some pictures of myself. The first one is pre pregnancy, I was about 125 pounds there. The second is me at 21 weeks, the third is at 25 weeks, and the last is at 30 weeks. Thanks for listening!!

Your Age: 24
~Number of pregnancies and births:3 pregnancies, currently 31 weeks

Updated here.