Update

Second Pregnancy, Trying to Avoid the Mistakes – Update (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Child Loss, Pregnant, Second Pregnancy, Submissions, Update 4 Comments

Previous entry here.

My age: 25
Number of pregnancies and births: 3 pregnancies, 1 birth
I have a 2 year old son and I am currently 23 weeks pregnant.

Technically this is my third pregnancy since the second one ended after 9 weeks in a miscarriage, but I refer to it as my second pregnancy because it’s the second baby I’m gonna have.
After my miscarriage in July 2012 I became pregnant again immediately and I am currently 23 weeks along.
Everything is looking perfect this time and at the last ultrasound we were told that we are having another boy! I know this is a horrible thing to say, but at the first moment I was a little bit disappointed, somehow I had thought that it was a girl this time. Fortunately these negative feelings vanished and I can honestly look forward to welcoming this little boy in our lives!

With this pregnancy I started showing very early and I am wearing maternity clothes since I’ve been 12 weeks along. As I wrote in my last entry, it took me a long time to accept the changes my body went through with the first pregnancy, so I do my best to not become as huge as I did the last time. You can call me shallow or vain and I know that there are many things way more important than my physical appearance, but I also know how unhappy I become if I don’t feel comfortable in my own skin.

I don’t go to the gym as often as I want to, only once or twice a week, because I work, I study and I have a 2 yr old to take care of.
I try to eat healthy most times, but I developed an immense sweet tooth with this pregnancy and sometimes I give in to my cravings.
I have gained 4kgs (nearly 9lbs) so far, which is more than I wanted to have at this point but still better than in my first pregnancy.
I have bought maternity jeans in the smallest size available and aim to wear them till the end.
And I also use every cream, lotion and oil I can find although I know that probably doesn’t help anything.

So although I know that chances are not very good since I already got stretchmarks with my rather small first pregnancy bump, I’m still hoping and working for a body that I can feel fine with postpartum.

Pictures:
#1: only 11 weeks along!
#2 – #4: 23 weeks (the last one is not very good, I included it because the stretchmarks are really obvious here)
All stretchmarks from first pregnancy.

My Stretch Mark Journey (Toni)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Pregnant, Submissions, Update 2 Comments

Age: 25
Number of pregnancies and births: 1 pregnancy/ 1 birth
The age of your children, or how far postpartum you are: 5 months pp

Original post here.

Last time I posted I was 32 weeks pregnant and I was just starting to get my first stretch marks. I honestly cried hysterically when I found them, but decided to put all of my negative emotions aside and tried to focus on the fact that I was soon going to be a mummy. By 39 weeks I had put on 13 kilograms (approx 28pounds), which I was absolutely ok with and a lot of people would tell me that I was carrying small for my gestation (they were all just trying to be nice, I’m sure). I had plenty of stretch marks on the day I gave birth (39+3 weeks) but after my labour and meeting my beautiful daughter, they were the least of my concern.

Just to give you a brief run down of my labour- I was registered to give Birth in the ‘Birth Centre’. This area has a natural birth mentality and they don’t offer drugs for pain relief, they instead have a bath for water births and assist you through breathing etc. So my only ‘plan’ was for my labour to be as unassisted as possible. After 5 hours of pushing, my contractions stopped and my baby’s heart rate had increased, she was also stuck sideways and not moving down, so they decided to intervene. Vacuum failed 3 times and I was moved in for an emergency c-sec. By this time however, she had moved too far down, so they decided on the use of forceps even though there was risk of brain damage and facial disfigurement because of her being an in incorrect position for vaginal delivery. She was born at 4:58pm on August 4th 2012 and taken to Special Care for respiratory issues and a Hematoma.

Approximately 4 days after giving birth, I had lost the 13 kgs and I was absolutely fine with my post baby body- I was honestly just happy to finally have my baby out of Special Care and be given the all clear by the Pediatricians! It wasn’t until about 7 or 8 weeks post partum that I realised my stretch marks were getting WORSE. I didn’t think it was possible and thought they were suppose to fade, but each day they were getting higher and redder as my tummy retracted! I was horrified. By 3 1/2 months pp, the stretch marks started to fade slightly on their own and although I was still upset by them, I knew they would continue to get better. At 4 months pp I started applying Strivectin SD cream twice daily, as I had read an article on how great it was for stretch marks and found some on sale discounted by 80%. I have been using this cream now for 3 weeks and I think the results are AMAZING! The marks are definitely still there, but they no longer feel deep and they’ve faded to a silvery white so quickly.

If you are worried about your stretch marks, I promise you THEY WILL GET BETTER! To put things into perspective, the most important thing is the beautiful little human you have created is happy and healthy. So as hard as it is, if you are pregnant, don’t focus on what the outside of your tummy looks like, and just enjoy what’s happening on the inside. And once you have your precious little treasure in your arms, spend as much time loving your miracle and loving your body for creating them!

Thanks for reading. Toni Xox

Pictures;
37 weeks pregnant
7 weeks pp (very red stretchies)
3 mths pp (yellow pants)
now 5 mths pp (pink shorts)

First Time Mommy (Mrs. Roussell)

Bonnie (SOAM) African American, Before Pregnancy, Belly, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Pregnant, Submissions, Update 15 Comments

Age: 23
Number of Children:1 4wks Pp

Im so glad I found this website!! I was 124lb 5″1 before I got pregnant..I loved my body and so did my husband which why I got pregnant lol…I was 160lbs and gave birth at 39wks.. Only one of my friends (age 23) has kids (2 girls) and only one immediate family members has 1 son, so I looked at them to see what my body would look like after having my son..my friend and I was pregnant at the same time.. we were 3 months apart.. 2 weeks after she had her daughter she looked like a freaking model!!!!! Big booty, nice boobs and a FLAT tummy!!! My family member is 3 yrs pp so I looked at her body since we are related I assumed my body would look similar after I had my son WRONG!! She looked like a thicker Model!!! Im so insecure about my body.. I wear big shirts and sweats around the house and refuse to let my husband touch my stomach no mater how many times he calls me beautiful or sexy I just dont see it…and the media doesn’t help..I see moms on tv and they look great example Heidi klum (i swear that women is a pure freak of nature lol) but needless to say seeing the images on this website has bought my self confidence from a 1 to a strong 2.5 lol but I so happy this website exist for moms to share :-)

1st picture: before pregnancy
2nd 9 months pregnant
3rd 3 weeks pp
4th and 5th 4 weeks pp.

Updated here.

A Mother’s Body (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Before Pregnancy, Belly, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Pregnant, Submissions, Update 8 Comments

Previous post here.

21 year old mother of a 1 year old boy

It’s funny what a few months can do to you. I wrote a second entry about my body and the sadness and disappointed that I felt at the fact that I did not lose the weight like everyone had assured me I would, and did not feel confident and sexy as I once did before becoming a mother. 5 months after writing that entry, I’m writing this one.

My son will be turning 1 in just over a week and I’ve realized that I don’t stop and stare at myself after showers, I don’t hide under the covers when my husband and I make love, and I don’t care about changing how I look. I’m finally okay with me, just the way I am.
I was lucky enough to go through such a life change as pregnancy and parenting with someone so accepting and loving. He hasn’t changed a single thing about how he adores and reacts to my body and I can tell he appreciates my body more now for bringing his son into our lives.

I look at my son everyday and wonder how I would have been so sad in the first few months about how I looked, when it was all so worth it. Why was I so focused on something so irrelevant when I had a gorgeous child in front of me, something the doctors said I would never have. I’m not saying accepting the changes of your body is easy, and I perfectly understand that my body could look much different and be much harder to accept, but I think the reason I accepted it was because I stopped judging it. It doesn’t matter how I looked before getting pregnant and when I finally stopped making that comparison I realized that this body I have now may be different, but it’s not unattractive. It’s the body of a mother, and that is a beautiful thing in so many ways.

First photo is just a month before conceiving, in a size 2, Second photo is at 41 weeks pregnant, Third to Sixth photo are of my body as I am now, just a week shy of 1 year postpartum, Seventh photo is the only time I dared to wear a bikini after the birth of my son and the very last photo is my beautiful and healthy little boy, the thing that made it all worth it!

This will be my second and final entry but I will continue to read every submission. I’m so amazed at the strength everyone has just to post the change in their bodies, whether minimal or not. It’s truly played a big part in the acceptance of my body in this journey as a mother! Thank you.

Two Months PP With #2 (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Postpartum, Pregnant, Second Pregnancy, Submissions, Update 2 Comments

Number of children/births- 2
Age-23
Prepreg weight- 116
Postpreg weight- 129

Previous post here.

I wasnt in a good place after my second post. I was struggling with my body after my husbands infidelity. Soon after that post I got pregnant with my second child, a girl. I was excited, but thought Oh Boy, here we go again. I have never been one of those people who love being pregnant, I think its cute on everyone else and I miss it when I’m not. With my first pregnancy, I gained 20 pounds and got one long, thick stretch mark on my side. Breastfeeding for nearly 2 years had left my breasts alittle saggier then I remembered them, but I was feeling really pretty about my body! Almost right away, I was hungry all the time, really hungry not just snacky. I gained 10 lbs in the first 8 weeks. This was making me really nervous. I had another GREAT pregnancy though, I have been blessed to be able to have such healthy pregnancies and then healthy babies. When all was said and done at the end of August near my delivery date, I had gained 29 pounds, and my stretch mark got long and wider. I had an awesome delivery, I wanted to go it natural since I had had an epidural the first time and it ended up with me not being able to push effectively and having to have a vacuum assit and then I tore, healing took longer….So I labored until 8-9 centimeters before getting some pain relief through my IV, but I could still feel to push, feel her move down, feel her come out with her little hands up by her ears and didnt tear this time. Recovery seemed fast and easy, although everyday brings me something new having two little girls to care for, I still have about ten pounds I’d like to loose and hopefully tone up my tummy. My husband and I were able to overcome our problems, and our marriage is going pretty well. We’d like to have another child a few years down the road, I am excited for that yet nervous, I feel that having two children has made my body alien to me, what would a third do to it? I love this site, been following all your stories since my first daughter was born, its a great place for us to voice our fears and concerns and find reassurance! Thanks for posting and thanks for reading.

First and second photo-30 weeks with #2
Third and Fourth photo-8 weeks pp

Over Two Years Later and Another Baby – Update (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Cesarean, Cesarean Scar and/or Incision, Postpartum, Second Pregnancy, Submissions, Update 6 Comments

Original post here.

It has been over two years since my first submission/story was posted on this wonderful site. My amazing son will soon turn five years old and he is still more than I could have ever hoped and wished for. My husband is still active duty in the Marine Corps and we endured another combat deployment, this time to Afghanistan. It was even harder than the other deployments for a few reasons. One being the communication was almost non existent. We went over a month with no contact due to his location. The second was that I was pregnant during the deployment! We had no clue the day he left, but about a month into the deployment I found out we were expecting. I could hardly believe it. I had to then wait and wait for a rare phone call to finally tell him the news! At my first Dr appt. we calculated that we must have conceived within 7-5 days before he had left! During the second trimester we then found out we were having another boy. Due to some re enlistment/time left on contract issues they had to send him home a few months early (hey no complaints here!!!) I was so beyond relieved to have him home and so happy he would get to be around for the last part of the pregnancy and birth!

I did a bit better with weight gain this time around. Started at 150 lbs and was at 186 lbs day of delivery. Unfortunately I delivered via repeat c section even though the Dr had given me a 75% chance of successful VBAC. The delivery was awful. I had mild Pre eclampsia and they wanted to induce me at 39 weeks. I ended up getting food poisoning/bad stomach virus a few days before my induction date. I was so sick and dehydrated that it was causing me to contract. They admitted me and gave me fluids & anti nausea medication. Then proceeded to start pitocin. Within the first 15 min or so of getting the pitocin the baby had a drop in heart rate severe enough that they told me we HAD to do an emergency cesarean. At that point I was so exhausted that I didn’t even want to talk about it. To top it all off, my spinal did not fully take. I wasn’t “numb” completely and ended up feeling some of the pain from the surgery. They wanted to put me under with a breathing tube but I freaked out on the table and pleaded with them. They instead gave me very strong meds during the rough parts. I felt like Alice falling down the rabbit hole. It was loopy, scary, weird and painful all mixed together, but I was awake to hear his first cry. I was able to see his face and kiss my beautiful baby boy, and that I am grateful for. It was love at first sight. He looked just like his big brother! 7 lbs 1oz and perfect from head to toe!

His 1st Birthday was just a few days ago and I still find it hard to believe he is ONE! I love my boys and I love how they interact together.
As for me and my body these days… I still have work to do… But as I’ve gotten older and possibly wiser lol, I realize that I am not ruined or unsightly. I am a Mother. I am Unique. I am strong, and I am filled with love. How can I hate those things?? I am on the right path I believe. I am now at 156 lbs, with a goal of 140 lbs and 21% body fat. I plan on adding more weight training to my fitness and am excited to find out how my body will react to it.

I’m not sure if I gained any new stretch marks or not.. To me it doesn’t really look like it. Although I do think I have a bit more loose skin now… The wrinkle under my belly button is still there and I have an “apron” when I bend over lol.

I keep saying this lately: “Love conquers all”. I truly believe it too… For whoever may read this far.. All I ask is to love yourself, love who you are, you are one of a kind!

~Age: 28 (will be 29 on Nov 28th)
~Number of pregnancies and births: 2 pregnancies and 2 births
~The age of your children, or how far postpartum you are: 4 years old and 1 year old, 1year postpartum.

My body eight months after my little miracle. (Jamie)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Submissions, Update 6 Comments

Age: 22
Number of Pregnancies/ Births: 1

I just turned 22, and have a beautiful 8 1/2 month baby girl. My pre pregnancy weight was 166lbs, I did great through the first 7 months of pregnancy only gaining 10lbs, then all of a sudden I was gaining a pound a day getting up to 214lbs!! I was scared to death of stretch marks, I already had very fragile self esteem. I started getting them one by one ,at 7 months, I cried after seeing each one form.

After my daughter’s birth I was grateful, she is my little ray of light. Even though I was so happy, I also was so depressed. I hated my body and myself. I didn’t want to eat, or get dressed in the morning, on top of that, I had to get over it quick because I had to go to work 2 weeks after I had my baby.

It was a slow process getting used to the new routine and being away from my pride and joy all day. (Not to mention having to dress in business attire)

I eventually got used to it, and lost all of my weight plus some. I bought the expensive stretch cream, and applied it religiously; my stretch marks faded some but my stomach never tightened up. Below are the pictures now 8 1/2 postpartum. I already lost 74lbs, have been doing pelvic tilts and trying to make my stomach look better. Will it ever be normal again? I know stretch marks fade but will my belly button ever be circle? Will my stomach ever not have wrinkles? I just need to know, what I am facing for full recovery.

Updated here.

Gaining Acceptance and a Little Appreciation (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Postpartum, Second Pregnancy, Submissions, Update 3 Comments

Number of pregnancies/births: 2/2
Currently 3 weeks pp: weighing 166 pounds
Weight before pregnancy #2: 155 pounds
Weight on delivery day (40 weeks prego) 194 pounds
Height: 5’10”

After my first pregnancy I realized soon into my pp days that I was “cursed” with this saggy, wrinkly skin and horrendous stretch marks. I was convinced that I was no longer attractive, not now and never would be again. All of my two piece bathing suits went to good will. Not that I was ever completely satisfied with my body, being the typical young female and all, but I had it in me to appreciate my flat stomach and I had pretty nice boobs… Now both of those are no longer in existence. After breast feeding number 1, my boobs sag a bit. Now 3 weeks pp with number 2, I am being reintroduced to my saggy belly. Surprisingly enough, as I look at it now it doesn’t seem as bad as I thought of it the first time around. I think a lot of this has to do with this site and all of the wonderful women sharing their stories/pictures/encouraging words/words of wisdom… Even from the youngest of moms!! When I found out I was prego again, I remember saying to my husband “I promise after this one I will get into the best shape of my life and schedule a total mommy makeover…” he just rolled his eyes and tried to convince me that he finds me attractive and surgery is not needed… Yea right, I thought. Well, no longer do I feel I need a total mommy makeover. I have two beautiful girls. I know too many girls who can’t have kids and would die for my saggy skin so they can hold their newborn in their arms… As I hold my three week old in my arms, and I play with my toddler, I remind myself how blessed I am… Life is crazy hectic but these two beautiful girls are my world and I wouldn’t trade anything for that! Here are some photos 3 weeks pp with number 2… I do still plan to work out and eat healthy so I have a ways to go but I’ve gained acceptance and a little appreciation… Thank you to all who have shared and commented….

Updated here.

Update – Teen Learning to Love Her Body (Faith)

Bonnie (SOAM) Adoption, Belly, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Submissions, Teen Mom, Update 5 Comments

Your Age: 18
Number of pregnancies and births: 1
The age of your children, or how far postpartum you are: 3

Story: It has been three years. I posted my story 3 whole years ago, and I can’t believe time has flown by so fast.
Here is my original post.

What has changed? So much. It is unbelievable. I graduated high school, met two really nice ladies and they let me move in with them, I’m going to school, and I work here and there. Everything is going perfect. I am not with the same person I was with when I posted last. Things happened between us, which is just fine :)

My baby is now three years old, and I get pictures of him once in a while. Thank you women so much for the supportive comments.

I have lost about 40lbs, but I am still working on it.

Photo 1: 3 years PP. Still working on it
Photo 2: Me graduating high school
Photo 3: This is my beautiful son.

Update (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Update 14 Comments

Previous post here.

Today I am writing to show the progress i have made physically. But emotionally SO MUCH MORE, i CONFIDENTLY wear a two piece everywhere now, i EMBRACE every bit of the accomplishment my body went through. I have baby fever VERY badly and am wanting to try for baby number two! after 5 years (my son just started Kinder this year!!) and alot of self hate, i am happy and whole and ready to do it all over again.

ONLY this time, I got some irregular results back on my pap while making sure i was okay to try again. Now i am waiting on test results to come back to determine cervical cancer.

I am angry that I spent so much time hating my body and not appreciating it, and using it for its wonders, that now (perhaps) it may be too late. If I cannot have another child I know that I have been blessed with one AMAZING little boy and a VERY supportive husband. God has a plan. I just hope that plan allows me another baby.

* the picture attatched is over a 2 year process of eating healthier and working out moderatly… I could only imagine the results i could have if i just stopped eating so many carbs and sugars, but i am happy with who i am now and LOVE my body