I became a widow 2 years ago in my early 30’s. I didn’t expect to be dating ever again…the prospect of showing your naked torso to a man who didn’t help put those stripes there is a frightening one to say the least. When the date clothes come off this is what you see…no hiding the marks of motherhood.
34 yrs old
4 pregnancies, 3 live births (2 teens and a 4th grader)
I have been really depressed over the years about my body. I have always been small chested, not even a full A cup. I have had four children. Breast fed the youngest past a year old. My cup size ranged from a before pregnant to probably a DD. Then back down to a 30B (technically a typical A cup) after weaning. I always thought there was something wrong with my breasts because bras never fit right. Wait! it was the bras that were the wrong size. Nobody ever taught me that! Finally realized I was a 30 band size and that changed everything.(american eagle bras fit me great!) I still dont like how they hang and are deflated. Sometimes I get really depressed about it. I dont feel like a woman a lot of the time. But then I have to realize that I shouldn’t base my self esteem on what i think others view me as. I started working out hard. It helped lift the breasts a little. Why can’t deflated be sexy too?
~Age: 37
~Number of pregnancies and births: 4
~The age of your children, or how far postpartum you are: youngest is two oldest is an adult.
I just wanted to share the photo I just took of my son falling asleep squishing my belly. I have five children. He’s my youngest, almost 3yrs now. I had to have a hysterectomy and I haven’t been feeling the best since then. I don’t get many moments like this with him since I have been sick a lot lately. So I don’t like how my belly looks but I treasure this moment.
Please tell me what I can read! I’ve had children I’ve got a mess of a stomach etc stretch marks loads of problems… 4 children were the ex husbands he told me after I had kids he missed my body from before I had children (I don’t know where to start), cheated on me. Divorced him. Was single for years . Met a guy thought he was nice almost two years ago now we have 1 son together now. And I found out he’s gone out where there’s skimpies, had porn and crap on Facebook, been liking porn on Instagram. I can’t breath! It matters to me I told him I’m not ok with it and he says it means nothing but it’s not ok, it makes me feel like I mean nothing and he didn’t love or want me.
I just feel like I could stop breathing and die I can’t take this…
What did I do I can’t do anything about my stretch marks
3 giant baby bears + short torso = this crepey saggy skin! It just sort of hangs there after losing weight. But you know, some pretty wonderful people began life there so I can appreciate it for the sake of nostalgia. And for those of us who have our abs cut through a few times, i think we can forgive ourselves for not being what we used to be.
~Age: 33
~Number of pregnancies and births: 4 pregnancies. Miscarriage @16 wks, 3 healthy wild boys
~The age of your children, or how far postpartum you are: 9yrs, 4yrs, 3yrs
~3 C-sections. I still can’t feel my abs.
In 2008, at 20 years old, I gave birth to my oldest, Eddie, and I became a mom via emergency c-section. After 38 hours of labor my firstborn got stuck while I was pushing, we were rushed into emergency surgery and he made his entrance five days after his due date at 4:03 am, 7 pounds, 14 ounces, 21 inches long. After having jaundice and a brief stay in the NICU, we got home and began our new life as a tiny family. Two years later I met the man who would become my husband, and our little family grew.
When we’d been together two years, we got two pink lines after a year of TTC and a diagnosis of PCOS, our first pregnancy! We were thrilled! But 8 weeks along we lost our precious miracle, the first of three miscarriages. Then our little girl, Lilly, was stillborn at 22 weeks gestation in August 2013. I almost gave up on the hope of other children all together.
Finally in September 2014 we got two pink lines again. I had a good feeling about this time, I even started having dreams about a baby boy. In December we learned my dreams were right, it was a boy we would be welcoming to our family! We chose the name Alexander, and waited impatiently for the weeks to pass til I was passed that magical 24 week viability – the point at which our son would hopefully be safe even if he arrived early.
The fates smiled on us and Alex arrived full term and healthy! 7 pounds, 2 ounces, 21 inches long, via repeat planned cesarean at 10:15 am on a beautiful May morning. His big brother came right to the hospital that afternoon and held his baby brother, declaring it the best day of his life! The four of us could not have been more in love.
Today Eddie is seven and a half, Alex is seven months old, I’m a month from my 28th birthday, and we are about to move into our first house.
~Age: 27
~Number of pregnancies and births: 6 pregnancies, 3 births – two live, one still, 3 miscarriages.
~The age of your children, or how far postpartum you are: 7 1/2 years and 7 months
Age: 28?
Number of pregnancies and births: 4?
The age of your children, or how far postpartum you are: 9, 5, 3, 9 months?
Hello,
I’d first like to say, I am 9 months post partum with my 4th pregnancy. I carried a friends baby for her this time as she couldn’t. So I only have 3 children that I take care of not 4. I got pregnant when I was 18 and my body seemed to bounce back pretty well. I assume this is because I was very young when I had her. I then had my other 2 children at 22 and 24 and gained some extra weight (10lb) I couldn’t get rid of. I thought I was done having babies after that but at 27, my friend was having such a struggle getting pregnant so I did something crazy and offered my body as the baby carrier for her child. I wouldn’t take it back for anything but it really did a number on my body this time plus an extra 20lbs on top of that ten. I am now 30 some pounds overweight. I discovered a month ago that I have diastasis recti. I’m sure a lot of moms are familiar with this term but for those that aren’t its when your tummy muscles are open instead of closed like normal. So my organs are pretty much left hanging out without the muscles to hold them back causing a mommy tummy that’s pretty obvious. I was hopeful when I learned I could correct this without surgery. I’m in the process right now of correcting it and have made some great improvements in just a month with exercises alone.
Unfortunately, I have also discovered that I have hypothyroidism, which has made it almost impossible to lose any of the baby weight I have gained over the past ten years of baby making. My initial goal was to lose 30lbs after this pregnancy but I can’t even lose one. Literally. I’m really struggling with this and praying I will figure it out. My goals aren’t unrealistic and I’m not trying to look perfect either but it’s really discouraging when you can’t even lose 1lb and you do everything right. I eat very healthy and over the past 9 months, I have worked out until I can’t work out anymore. I’ve worked my butt off for nothing it seems. I’m not scared to watch what I eat or to work out so that I can lose weight either. It’s been very hard to deal with not just physically but emotionally and mentally too. I use to have my good and bad days with my self esteem because of how my body looks and how society says beauty should look. One important thing I’ve learned from it all and that I’d like to share with women who are struggling with self esteem or body issues after having a baby is this:
I don’t have the cute body anymore. Most people would look at me and say my body isn’t very attractive. I have stretch marks. I have a mommy tummy and my thighs don’t have that perfect little gap between them that so many women nowadays are after. (I probably never will either lol) I carry extra weight practically everywhere and have some interestingly shaped boobs now that I’ve had 4 children. Society would say my body is far from beautiful but……. it has done something more beautiful than I could ever make it look. It’s made life and I am so proud of that. Not every woman gets the privilege to carry their children and make something as beautiful as your body did.
Updated here.
Previous post here.
Age – 29
Pregnancies – 5
Births – 3
PP – 9, 6, 2
Hello again everyone! For those not familiar with me, I have given birth to 3 boys so far. Connor would be 9 this month, he passed away when he was 19 months old. Liam is 6, and Emerson will be 2 this month. Right before I got pregnant with Emerson, I lost a baby when I was 7 weeks pregnant. I am now 22 weeks pregnant with my 4th and last baby, another boy! We are naming him Gavin Michael :) I would not call myself a person that likes to be pregnant. In fact, I hate being pregnant! I feel sick the whole time, I feel tired, and I get huge. I started this pregnancy weighing 150 lbs (at only 5’2′), since I had not lost all of my weight from Emerson. After I had Emerson, I did not have motivation to work out, so I didn’t. I very much regret that now! I am 22 weeks and I am up to 166 already. I ended my pregnancy with Liam and Emerson at around 180. After this baby I am planning to get into great shape again, and then get a tummy tuck. I know that I should embrace my loose skin, and I always said that I would not get a tummy tuck (especially after Connor passed away), but I have changed my mind. I just want to feel good in clothes again. Something I was worried about was losing my stretch marks…but since they go far above my belly button, I will keep a lot of them :) I will keep you all posted!
Pictures are Connor age 15 months, Liam age 6, Emerson age 22 months, Gavin, and me at 22 weeks :)
I am a runner that runs 70-80 miles a week. I have 5 children ages 13, 11, 9, 2, and 1. I just want to share that despite working very hard on my body this is what I am left with.
Age: 26
# of children: 5
Hello, I have found this site so uplifting the last few days as I am struggling with my weight, again, after baby #5. I married the love of my life and my best friend when I was 18. We are getting ready to celebrate 8 beautiful, amazing, exciting, hard, wisdom-building years together! We had our first child when I was 20, a boy. After he was born I started having serious issues and was diagnosed with postpartum psychosis (another thing rarely ever talked about.) This was the most difficult time of my life. A time that’s supposed to be magical and beautiful and full of happiness, instead was marred by grief and confusion and pain. Only with the saving grace of my Lord and Saviour JESUS CHRIST did my family and I make it through this. And for the first time in my life I questioned my calling of motherhood. All I’d ever wanted was to marry the love of my life and have LOTS of babies, and after the time we had with the first I thought surely I’d gotten it wrong. Well, as usual, God laughed (in love, of course), and gave me another and another and another and another. And so, in the space of a little over 5 years, my husband and I were abundantly blessed with 5 beautiful sons! Yes, that’s right, all boys. No, none of them are twins. Yes they are all ours together. Yes, I know what causes that (and I like it ;)) And yes, we could have our own basketball team! (These are questions I’m asked and comments that are made every time we leave our house.) At first, I really hated all the staring we got, but eventually I realized our family was a rarity, and a badge of honor. I’m starting to see my fat and my stretch marks and my grey hairs and my cellulite as badges of honor too. If it weren’t for this body, none of my mini-men would be here. And if it weren’t for my mental war after #1, I wouldn’t be able to stand tall and say, ‘after that I can do anything.’ Every single person on this earth needs to know that there are much much worse things than being fat or ugly or too skinny or bony or soft or whatever has you down. I’d much rather be fat than mean or angry or selfish. The hardest person to love is yourself, but look at those beautiful babies YOU created and know that they don’t see what you see. Your littles see momma’s kisses, momma’s hugs, momma’s comfort, momma’s love. Your babies see you through God’s eyes, they do not care about your outside, just as God does not. What matters is your heart.
These are pictures of me at 2 months postpartum with baby #5. #4 and #5 were born 10 months apart. I now have 5 under 6
God Bless
