A Message for All Moms (Anonymous)

Age: 28?
Number of pregnancies and births: 4?
The age of your children, or how far postpartum you are: 9, 5, 3, 9 months?


I’d first like to say, I am 9 months post partum with my 4th pregnancy. I carried a friends baby for her this time as she couldn’t. So I only have 3 children that I take care of not 4. I got pregnant when I was 18 and my body seemed to bounce back pretty well. I assume this is because I was very young when I had her. I then had my other 2 children at 22 and 24 and gained some extra weight (10lb) I couldn’t get rid of. I thought I was done having babies after that but at 27, my friend was having such a struggle getting pregnant so I did something crazy and offered my body as the baby carrier for her child. I wouldn’t take it back for anything but it really did a number on my body this time plus an extra 20lbs on top of that ten. I am now 30 some pounds overweight. I discovered a month ago that I have diastasis recti. I’m sure a lot of moms are familiar with this term but for those that aren’t its when your tummy muscles are open instead of closed like normal. So my organs are pretty much left hanging out without the muscles to hold them back causing a mommy tummy that’s pretty obvious. I was hopeful when I learned I could correct this without surgery. I’m in the process right now of correcting it and have made some great improvements in just a month with exercises alone.

Unfortunately, I have also discovered that I have hypothyroidism, which has made it almost impossible to lose any of the baby weight I have gained over the past ten years of baby making. My initial goal was to lose 30lbs after this pregnancy but I can’t even lose one. Literally. I’m really struggling with this and praying I will figure it out. My goals aren’t unrealistic and I’m not trying to look perfect either but it’s really discouraging when you can’t even lose 1lb and you do everything right. I eat very healthy and over the past 9 months, I have worked out until I can’t work out anymore. I’ve worked my butt off for nothing it seems. I’m not scared to watch what I eat or to work out so that I can lose weight either. It’s been very hard to deal with not just physically but emotionally and mentally too. I use to have my good and bad days with my self esteem because of how my body looks and how society says beauty should look. One important thing I’ve learned from it all and that I’d like to share with women who are struggling with self esteem or body issues after having a baby is this:

I don’t have the cute body anymore. Most people would look at me and say my body isn’t very attractive. I have stretch marks. I have a mommy tummy and my thighs don’t have that perfect little gap between them that so many women nowadays are after. (I probably never will either lol) I carry extra weight practically everywhere and have some interestingly shaped boobs now that I’ve had 4 children. Society would say my body is far from beautiful but……. it has done something more beautiful than I could ever make it look. It’s made life and I am so proud of that. Not every woman gets the privilege to carry their children and make something as beautiful as your body did.


Updated here.

Let Me Out of Here (Angele)

Hi everyone, this is my third entry; my first 2 can be seen here and here. A little recap. I am 29 years old and I have 2 daughters, ages 8 and 4. I recenlty gave birth to a third daughter in April 2010; but she was not mine to keep, I was a surrogate! :) I had decided long ago after the birth of my second daughter that one day I would have a tummy tuck and get my diastasis recti and lax skin fixed!! I did it!! I am 5 weeks post surgery and recovering slowly but surely.

As I was looking through some pictures, I was amazed at what I saw. I had always joked that when I was pregnant, it felt as though the girls were trying to claw their way out of me!!Well, it looks like they almost suceeded! I outlined the clawmarks aka: stretchmarks on my belly so it could be easier for you all to see!! LoL 10 silver clawprints !! I have to say, I am so happy that I still have these! I love them!! Would a smooth belly be prettier to look at? Possibly but not to me! I may have altered my mommy belly, but I cherish my childrens permanent finger paintings! :)


Happy in My Skin (Ziona)

I have given birth twice so far, once by c-section, and once vaginally. My youngest is 10 months old now, and I’m finally starting to feel happier in my new skin. I have stretch marks, cellulite, sagging breasts, bags under my eyes, and the c-section “flap”. I will probably start a dance exercise program (Zumba anyone?) because I still feel the urge to tone. But my stretched out belly is still beautiful, as my son can attest when he chooses to cuddle with it instead of his daddy. I still feel beautiful all over, because the most precious thing in my life considers me to be the end all of awesome! How can I feel bad about myself when someone so perfect thinks I’m the best EVER?? I honestly can’t. And I breastfeed, so while my breasts are no longer perky, they sustain my precious child and give him comfort. He spends hours a day coming over to me and begging for a sip or a snuggle, and it makes me feel great to be so wanted and needed, regardless of whether other people think I’m too fat.

I’m hoping to be a surrogate this year, so I think I’ll do an update if it’s successful on how I’m feeling about my body after giving someone who can’t have children the gift of life! I’m so excited!

~Age: 22
~Number of pregnancies and births: 2 and 2
~The age of your children, or how far postpartum you are: 10 months

1 month after twins, born at 35 weeks 3 days (Jacoba)

I had my son in 2008, and shortly after decided that I would pursue my dream of helping an infertile couple have a child. I met a wonderful couple in November, and by March 2009 we had contracts signed, and were moving ahead to transfer day! We transferred two embryo’s in May, (not my genetics) which resulted in a twin pregnancy. Twenty weeks later they found out they were expecting two girls! At the end of December 2009, I began to experience a severe headache, which eventually led to experiencing vision problems. I called 911, as my husband was out of town, and was on my way to the hospital shortly after. I was quickly diagnosed with pre-eclampsia and rushed in for an emergency c-section. Unfortunately the parents were not able to make it there on time, but they met their little ones shortly after.

I’m currently 5 weeks out from the c-section, and feeling pretty good. The incision still hurts when my little guy bounces on me, but I’m more or less back to daily activities. I think I was vacuuming a week and a half after, so I really didn’t have much ‘recovery’ time. I guess that’s to be expected when you have a little one at home! :)

The pictures really don’t do my stretch marks justice. They appear a bit darker in person. Although I had expected much worse in terms of sagging skin and stretch marks, I’m still pretty disappoint at the ‘overhang’ created above my scar. I’m REALLY hoping it somehow disappears :D

~Your Age: 23
~Number of pregnancies and births: 2 pregnancies and 3 births
~The age of your children, or how far postpartum you are: 17 month old, and 1 month old surro twins

Description of the pics:
#1- Less then 12 hours after c-section
#2- Less then 12 hours after c-section
#3- 3 days after c-section
#4- 5 weeks post scar
#5- 5 weeks post scar
#6- 5 weeks post

Two-Time Gestational Surrogate and Mother of Two (Anonymous)

Hi I am a 2x Gestational Surrogate. I also have 2 kids of my own Baylee 11 and Tyler 5. I am a proud surrogate of 2 baby girls. One born 2/27/07, and another born 8/25/08. I am proud of all 4 babies I have given birth to. However my first child was the pregnancy to give me my lovely stretch marks and chubb. All 3 other pregnancies gave me no additional stretch marks. My weight has been up and down over the years. I am actually at my lowest now 140lbs. I am proud of this as this is after 4 pregnancies. I would not change a thing, but do admitt I wish I did not have the stretch marks and chubb around the belly. My 2 kids were vaginal births in 1997, and one in 2003. My first surrogate baby was an emergrncy c-section, and my second surrogate baby was a repeat c-section. I am proud of them all. And have grown to accept my body as it is.

Here I am 38 weeks along with my 4th pregnancy. This pregnancy was my second surrogate baby

This is me after my 3rd pregnancy and first surrogate baby. See how heavy I still was. Im the lady on the right.

Here I am at 26 weeks along with my 4th surrogate baby. This is my son Tyler 5yrs old.

This is me Christmas 2008 with Tyler again. After 4 pregnancies. I lost 42 lbs since delivering my last baby and that is 15 less than before I was pregnant. I am very proud of myself as I have always been over weight.

eighteen months postpartum with baby #2 and 100 pounds lighter (Anonymous)

My entire life I have hated my body. And because of that hatred, I had no desire to take care of myself. I gained weight, lots of weight, and teetered on the edge of 300lbs. Then in my quest to become a surrogate mother, I started reading about beautiful women who hate their bodies because they cannot carry babies.That really put things into perspective for me. After two children, and a lot of soul-searching, I finally was able to take charge of my life and start appreciating my body for it’s function instead of hating it for it’s appearance. I’ve still got a long road to go. But I’m on my way to being healthy both mentally and physically. Right now, I’m putting my weightloss aside to persue helping another couple have a baby. At eighteen weeks pregnant with my surro-babe, I am truly grateful for my body’s amazing ability to create and sustain life. Beauty fades, but my children are my legacy, and the joy they have brought me will last my whole life long. When you really think about it, what’s a few stretch marks and extra pounds, when you’re getting the chance of a lifetime to be expirience carrying your own child?

Updated here.