Not Happy With My Breasts (K)

Age:25
Number of pregnancies: 4
Live births: One 5.5 year old (and one on the way!)
22 Weeks Pregnant in photos
Breastfed for 19 months

I had my daughter when I was 20-before that I had nice perky and full breasts, a nice stomach and a butt I was happy with. I always had cellulite, which did always bother me, but until I had a postpartum body, that was my only insecurity. When I come onto this site, I look at the photos of mothers who have great bodies and complain about them, and I only wish I could find a body (or boobs in general) that looked as bad as mine, to make myself feel normal. My breasts are sagged much more than those who post on this site. My nipples aren’t always as big, as they have expanded since I am pregnant, but they were never matching-at least not after I gave birth to my daughter, over 5 years ago. My stomach is a road map of stretch marks, and while I know it’s not attractive, i can live with that. My breasts are my issue. They don’t even sit right in 99% of all bras which makes me self-conscious about wearing shirts that show even a tiny crack of cleavage.

I decided that I should submit my body photos to the site to 1: show women their bodies are not bad at all, and 2: in case someone does have breasts like mine, to let them know they are not alone. Maybe I will update again after I have baby # 2…

Thanks so much for reading my story!

Two Weeks Postpartum Baby # 2 (Anonymous)

My first child is 7 years old and I had the pupps rash and severe stretch marks that later faded. I had some lose skin but this baby has given me a hanging pouch. My son was born 9-22 and I carried him straight out front like a watermelon. I gained about 26 lbs and have lost all but about 12 . I had lost that after about the first week but I’m staying steady at 130 now. I am swollen or have a hard spot above belly button(uterus?) I don’t remember this with DD. my belly button is awful. It’s flipped completely out. Here I am 2 weeks and 1 day pp, 2nd child.

My Rainbow Baby and VBA2C! (Shannon)

Most recent post here.
# of pregnancies and births: 4/3
How far pp: 7 years, 4.5 years, 2.5 weeks
Age: 27

As you all know (since I post here frequently!), I lost my 3rd pregnancy. I have had quite the bumpy road as far as my babies go. Connor passed away 5 years and 5 months ago (his 7th birthday was on September 24th), I had my 2nd only a year later, lost my 3rd, and just gave birth to my 4th baby on 9/19, Emerson James! It was a successful VBA2C :) You can read my other posts if you have never read any of my stories.

Here is my birth story written by my husband:

Sunday Night:
We dropped Liam off at Megan and Steve’s house so he could play with Canyon. We left there at a little after 6PM. There was traffic because of a baseball game, so we did a little detour near northeasten. All told we pulled in at 715, right on the dot.

We were admitted to the maternity floor and had a really nice nurse (who had recently graduated from UMass). The next few hours was a combination of doctors (most notably the one with the purple hair clip) to convince you that the best way to induce was to do “the balloon” followed by some Pitosin. You were concerned that, should the induction not take, you would then be coerced into doing a C-section. During the course of this, you were inspected and determined to be 1cm dilated. Also, Purple Hair Clip stripped your membranes. The doctor’s seemed a little confused as they thought you were here for an induction and yet you didn’t want the induction at the same time. In the end, partially due to PHC’s 30% success rate estimate, you decided to talk it over with Dr McElrath, your primary OB/GYN. He wasn’t available at the time, so we decided to get a hotel in hopes that we could meet with him the next morning.

Upon leaving the hospital we checked out the Howard Johnson near Fenway, but there was a game that night so it was very loud (and probably booked anyway). I looked around and decided to stay at the Best Western at 1650 Commonwealth ave. We got into the room at midnight (just as breaking bad was picking up where we left off). We watched the rest of breaking bad, then went to sleep.

Monday
We woke up and, after a few phone calls, settled on meeting with Dr McElrath at 1245. In the meantime we went to Whole Foods and got some breakfast in the form of delicious sandwiches. We met with McElrath and you were just as indecisive as last night. Fortunately McElrath made the decision for you, telling you that your best chance was to wait until you go into labor naturally. We decided to go home and wait. Before we left, we had one of what would turn out to be many meals at the Mission.

We got home, where your mom was watching Liam and Molly. The rest of the night was uneventful. We got to tuck Liam in, which was nice.

Tuesday
You starting feeling contractions around 3AM. You timed them for a while and then woke me up and we left around 6AM. Traffic was pretty bad so I cut through Woburn and back out onto 93. That saved us a little bit of time, but it still took about 1.5 hours.

Once there the doctors inspected you (and you were still 1cm dilated). After a few hours they inspected you again, and not much had changed. They said to go walk around for a while to see if that got things going. So we went to lunch at the Mission again and then met Jenny at the park on Mission Hill right off of Birgham Circle. There you did some sort of exercises to try to change Emerson’s position in your belly. I read a book. It was nice.

After the park we went to get something to eat at the Mission again (I had left my credit card there… surprise), this time Jenny joined us. The bartender gave us a free drink on account of your ripeness, which was cool of him.

We then went back to the hospital, and they inspected you… still not much progress (you might have been a little bit more effaced and softer, but nothing huge). After some chatting they decided to keep you overnight to see how things went. They decided this partially because you were having strong contractions.

Wednesday
Unfortunately, the contractions died down by the morning. You might have been 1.5cm dilated, and slightly more effaced, but progress was slow. Instead of inducing we decided to stay the (new) course of letting your body do what it wants to do. We were discharged, had lunch at the Mission, and went home. We got home around 3PM.

Liam was down on the Cape, so it was just us. We got some La Caretta and then hung out for a bit while you took bath (right before which some of your mucus plug came out). Afterwards you said it would be great to get a hotel with a hot tub. We called around and settled on the Crowne Plaza Nashua. We got there at about 630PM. You immediately got in the hot tub (which was concerningly high off the ground… funny to watch your ripe self climb into it). You were overly aggressive with the bubbles and we (mostly I) had to scoop them out and put them in the standup shower. Afterwards, I joined you in the tub (which had jets that shot out at ~100MPH). Shortly afterwards you noticed something in the bubbles. You weren’t sure what it was but we narrowed it down to three possibilities:
You pooped
You lost the rest of your mucus plug
Your water broke
You called the doctor and they said not to be concerned and that it was likely the rest of your mucus plug.

Thursday (midnight)

I should note that at this point your contractions are getting more intense. So we get back in the tub (actually just you for a while… I was chilling in a robe) as your contractions began to become more intense and more frequent. Later I jointed you in the tub and starting timing your contractions. They had been about 3-5 minutes apart for about an hour and a half when we decided to leave. We left the hotel room at 1:20AM.

The trip down to Brigham was an interesting one. I wasn’t sure if we were going to have enough gas, but I didn’t tell you at the time because you were having what appeared to be very painful contractions. Fortunately the gas was enough (barely) and the roads were wide open on account of the time, so we successfully arrived at Brigham at 2:05.

At admitting there was another pregnant woman when we arrived, and another one came in shortly after us. We all went up to the 5th floor of the CWN building (Center for Women and Newborns?). You were the last of the 3 to be brought to a room.

Once in the room, you were inspected and found to be about 4cm dilated at 80% effaced. Finally, we knew this was it and we were not leaving without Emerson coming out. In order to ease your pain and hopefully get you some rest, they gave you an epidural (something you were very excited about). During the epidural the anesthesiologist accidentally touched a wrong nerve, sending your right leg shaking. He said “What was that?” which, at the time, was discomforting. Afterwards we realized he was asking which leg it was (so he knew what it was he had touched). The rest of the anesthesia went off without a hitch and you tried to get some rest. The time was now around 5AM.

You got some rest over the next few hours, so not much happened. The nurse would periodically come in and check Emerson’s vital signs. Throughout the entire ordeal Emerson’s heart rate looked great, so again, nothing notable went on here.
Somewhere in midmorning you were determined to be about 6cm dilated. At this point I called Connie and Jenny to tell them they could come. They arrived late-morning and, after some chatting, you had them wait out in the waiting room until the time was right.
A little bit after noon you were inspected again and it was found that there was “just a lip” remaining. At this point the nurse got you getting ready to push. The next few hours was a slow progression with (what I presume to be) the usual milestones. Once it became clear that the head popping out was imminent, I was sent to fetch Connie and Jennny. They came in and watched. Your Mom prayed in the corner while I held your legs to “help” you push.

It’s worth noting that you pushed like a champ. Uncomfortable, but still cracking jokes. It was funny when they used a mirror to show you what was going on… you thought it was neat, but said you didn’t want to look in the mirror any more. As the head was out they asked if you wanted to touch it. You did, and you must’ve thought it was icky (kind of was), because you then wiped your hand on your gown.

Then you popped out the baby at 4:18PM. They put him on your chest right away, which you keep telling me was awesome (I love you baby… and I get it).
About 15-20 minutes post-partum Emerson latched on for breast-feeding. Maybe it had something to do with the skin-to-skin, but in any case, he was quite boss-like about it.

Attached photos are me 36 weeks pregnant with Emerson and my 3 boys on Connor’s birthday (Connor is on Emerson’s onsie!)

Mother of Three (Amanda)

age – 29
number of pregnancies-3
children 3- boy14-boy4-girl2

This site has been such a great inspiration to me through this journey, So grateful that it is here for us to all connect and tell our stories. I have been unable to answer to the comments on my earlier submission. When I had my baby Girl I thought I was never going to get my body back after 3 children and sooooo many pounds. I had always heard that healthy living is 80% nutrition and 20% exercise and now I know its true

my initial program was insanity, and then Hip Hop Abs, ChaLEAN Extreme, T25 and now Les Mills Combat, I eat cleaner and I run I would be more than happy to talk to any of the ladies who had asked. I recently added another t shirt to my collection!! I still have my pouch, I still have my stretch Marks. Im still not completely ok with the fact that I will never have any more children, My scoliosis still bothers me from time to time… Life is a work in progress and I love my three babies, 4 counting my fur baby scrappy please feel free to find me on fb if you ever want to chat.

First pic is my new tshirt :)
Second pic shows the s in my spine
Have a Fit Day!!

4 Weeks After Second C-Section (Heather)

4 weeks after second c-section

Hi ladies. I’m 26 years old and this is my second baby. My first was at 19. Both have been c-sections.

I started pregnancy 1 at 145 pounds (athlete). I was a size 4/6. I finished that pregnancy at 185, size 16.

I got some stretch marks in that pregnancy. I lost the weight in 9 months through fairly hard exercise (1 hour cardio 6x week) and a 1200-1800 calorie a day diet. It SUCKED. I also got 550cc implants to restore my breast fullness about 3 years post-partum. (Silicone under muscle for those wondering).

When I got pregnant this time I vowed not to gain the weight and hired a trainer. I worked out until 7 months and ate fairly well. I went from 135-170 this time. Interestingly, I did not get stretch marks.

These pictures are at 4 weeks after this pregnancy. The “before” one is in between pregnancies. I destroyed all my old PP pictures sadly…

In these pictures I am 147 lbs. 12 pounds over my goal. Currently a 6/8, 38-28-38. I seem to get pregnant in my ass…wow…not liking the size of it or the weird over the hips fat. However I know that patience is key and hopefully in 9 months from now I’ll be back into a 2/4.

Right now I’m walking an hour a day until I’m cleared for workouts and averaging 1800 calories a day, not breastfeeding.

I truly believe there is very little a person can do to control their body in pregnancy. Everything is genetics, well part how you take care of yourself but mostly genetics. For that reason we need to be easy on ourselves. I’m fairly ok with my outcome but I am VERY critical of my body so any weight is a struggle. Women are crazy like that, totally too hard on ourselves :)

My Story (Anonymous)

I am 34 years old and gave birth to my first child in June of this year. Before falling pregnant I had always suffered from poor body image at times although I had got really fit and was running and weight lifting. I guess I was as happy with my body at that stage, more than I had ever been before. Having lost an incredible amount of weight in my twenties (I went down from 301 pounds to 140 pounds) I had battled my demons but paid the price with saggy tummy skin and looser skin elsewhere. I learned to live with the excess skin, something that I would have to pay privately for to be removed and something I could not afford to do. To exacerbate the issue I suffer from a condition called hyper mobility which can have an effect on the elastin in the skin, making it more prone to scarring and stretching.

Anyhow I fell pregnant and realised that my tummy skin was going to take a serious hit, after all that weight I had lost. The pregnancy went well and I gave birth. I am now 12 weeks post partum and am glad to see the stretch marks are no different to the ones I had post weight loss, I might have the odd extra few here and there but I am currently 200 pounds so significantly more than the 150 I started at pre pregnancy. So I have a battle with not only losing weight but facing that stomach again. I do hate it, it makes me feel deformed and unattractive. I think it has affected me getting into a stable relationship and will continue to so, I don’t feel normal with it and do everything in my power to hide it in intimate situations. I am no longer with the person who fathered my child and I dread the day I may meet someone else as I have to face all my insecurities once again. I am trying to lose weight at the moment and am terrified of how much worse the sagginess will be, it is honestly destroying my confidence. I always looked great with clothes on and my figure was pretty good but I hated how I looked naked :( Who knows how bad it is going to be if I can get down to my pre pregnancy weight. Maybe I should try to approach my doctor again and explain the psychological effect it is having. I could not bring myself to take pictures to accompany this diatribe, I apologise but it ain’t pretty.

I do not share these feelings with anyone, I am embarrassed and ashamed to admit I have a deformation. Isn’t that sad?

Ugh I need to get over it and love me for me but I doubt I will to be honest!

25 And I Hate My Body (Anonymous)

I have been feeling so depressed. I’m 25 and I hate my body. I’ve had one child. She just turned 4. I just thought after 4 years I would look better and I don’t. I have exercised and watched what I eat and I’m down to 139 lbs but I don’t look it. All of the weight was lost everywhere BUT my midsection. It makes me feel deformed or something! And the awful stretch marks just make it even worse. My husband tells me that I shouldn’t wear a bikini because other people may make fun of me (but he says he doesn’t mind me in a bikini). That makes me feel even worse and obviously he does mind or he wouldn’t say that. Am I the only woman with such an out of proportion body?

After Two Babies Under 22 (Anonymous)

Two births have taken a toll on my body. My breasts have sagged and the skin on my abdomen has stretched. I plan to have these things fixed as soon as I have my last child (3 to 5 years from now) but for now, I feel hideous. I can’t have comfortable sex with my husband, I am extremely insecure and jealous (I never used to be) and although once a glowing beacon of happiness, I have become a bitter person. My friends and family don’t recognize who I have become and I’ve pushed people away and still do on a daily basis. I hate how much this body has affected me. Although the blessings it has given me are priceless and will be cherished always, I can’t help but feel the pain of not being able to look at my body in the mirror. I wish it could all go back to normal but basking in the joys of being a mother comes with a price.

~Age:22
~Number of pregnancies and births:2
~The age of my children: 4 and 1 1/2

Another Update (Anonymous)

Age:24
# of pregnancies: 5/ 4births
Age of children: 7yrs, 5yr, 3yrs, 6 1/2mos
How far post-partum: 6 1/2mos

Previous post here.

I am now 6 1/2 months post-partum from my daughter and I have been feeling pretty great :). I left my kids father back in June and it was honestly one of the best decisions I could have ever made due to his drug use. When I left him I was down in the beginning and notice an increased weight loss and assumed I’d gain it all back but now I have had a steady weight loss and don’t feel down at all. I have recently started to watch what I eat, try to excercise a bit more, and have definitely been a busy single mother. I feel that as I look right now I look good for having 4 children, but for my own peace of mind I definitely plan on continuing to work on my body I would like to lose about 30-40lbs more but I know even if I stayed at my current weight it wouldn’t be bad. I believe my confidence has increase now due to all the compliments and reponses I get, from both men and women, on my body when I tell someone I have 4 children. For all other moms out there, don’t give up your confidence is just deeply hidden and will definitely re appear when you least expect it to, I know mine sure did :)

First 4 pictures are of me 9/19/13; 6 1/2 months post-partum :)
5th pict: me at 3 months post-partum
6th: 6 mos post-partum

Update (Adria)

Number of pregnancies:1
Number of births:1
21 years old

Previous post here.

I’ve posted here before. I was disgusted with my breasts and body. I did not think I could be fixed. My family and friends I told me to wait at least one year post partum before I started to judge myself too harshly. I never understood why. But now I do. I am one year post part um now and for the most part my body is back to normal. I gave my body time to heal and it did. I may not be perfect but I feel pretty dang good. One of the biggest things that helped me was cutting down on fast food to once every week or two. And fitnessblender, look them up on face book. They offer free minimal to maximum workouts. Its so simple and easy too. I hope I can help someone today to change how they see themselves, as amazing beautiful mommies you all are. You don’t have to workout to be beautiful, but I know from experience that it makes your mind healthier you feel amazing and energized. I’m a much happier person now. Thank you for reading my update. I also attached a picture of my inspiration my son.