Being a Super Mom (Bree K)

Pregnancies: 6
Births: 3
Children: Twins 3 & a baby 2 months

I know there are many women on here. You come from all walks of life. However there are two things we have in common… we are unhappy or saddened by our bodies and we love our children.
Being a mother at a young age (20) I gave birth to twins a boy and girl (Johnathan & Allison.) After trying for so long to have a baby god blessed us with two. Now going on 4 yrs. this Christmas they have been my life. After having the twins I was very insecure with my body and didn’t’ find myself attractive… sound familiar ladies? So what I did was have my hubby take pictures of me, to see what I look like threw his eyes. It worked. I felt amazing after I saw the pictures and I realized that I wasn’t suppose to be ashamed of my body, but embrace it. It was after all what I prayed to god for. He gave me what I dreamed of. I know that it’s difficult to look in the mirror and think to yourself, “Wow I have a kick ass body.” Let’s face it ladies, there are very few of us who can do that.

After just having my second son, (Zach) on Aug. 2-10, I have been working my butt off to lose weight. I only gained 10 pounds with him and I gained 8 with the twins. After I had my twins I thought to myself that I missed my smooth skin, the non Freddy Couger look that I carry around my stomach now. But I was so thankful to have them, it no longer mattered. That is until my clothes were off. Here I am three kids later and I know that my tummy will always look like a nightmare. However there are things we can do about the looks. For many of us we cannot afford tummy tucks or breast lifts…. but here are a few helpful hints to get that new mama body back into shape. For those of us who are blessed with the breastfeeding boobies, I have found that push ups work wonders for giving our girls a lift. The tummy, well that’s a little harder. I’m still working on that one myself, but I have found that running, biking and a combo of other exercises do help decrease the flabbiness of the tummy and underarms, (batwings.)

Our children are what drives us to be better, what not let our husbands, boyfriends be the reason to get back into shape? That is what is driving me. I want to look better and feel sexy in my own skin. It’s time we got used to our new bodies and embrace them. I’m a bigger lady and I wear my skin with pride… on most days… think of stretch marks as battle scares of motherhood. The belly bulge as a reminder that you carried a human being for months and you brought him/her/them into this world healthy. You did that. Be proud mama, you deserve a little happiness. Next time you go into a public place, take a look around you. Look at the women. Today’s world is changing. There are many of us out there who are feeling the same way, but if you look closely you can see that we are the real women… not the women the public wants us to be. We are mothers and as such, we should embrace it. Be proud to be a mama and our bodies that our little ones gave us. I truly hope this post helps some of you, that this gives you ambition, hope and inspiration. I’m attaching some pictures of pre-pregnancy and post par tum along with my three children.

At the end of it all (Nicole)

Previous entry here.

~Age: 30
~Number of pregnancies and births: pregnancy #3/Birth #2
~The age of your children, or how far postpartum you are: 16 months and currently 36 weeks

My first was born shortly afer my first submission. She was suppose to be our last, our only-but there were other plans in motion. At first we weren’t thrilled at the prospect of having two little ones, but as my pregnancy progressed we the same feeling of excitement. Our daughter still has no clue that her life is going to change, but she will soon enough. I have run the gambit of emotions. I have managed to still stay strong.

My first go-around was very easy going-lots of energy, no morning sickness, gentle movements from the life within me. This time my pregnancy has been plauged with morning sickness, lack of energy, and movements that have caused brusing, but you know what-I wouldn’t give it up for anything in the world. These are the times that I relish, just me and this growing little one (even when the random little body part ends up in my hips or ribs). My heart is a little sad that this is our last one-for real, but I will always cherish these moments. I have strongly felt that everthing happens for a reason, sometimes we just don’t see it right away. My first was born to soften the blow of losing my father. This little one is a blessing in some cosmic way for us. As much as I enjoy pregnancy, I can’t wait to meet this little person.

I Made Them and They Made Me (Tanya Rose)

There was a time when I pranced around no bigger than a minute and cute as a button. Then at 15 years old, I became pregnant with my first son. I was 92 lbs. and throughout my pregnancy I was forced to gain weight by my Dr. because I was “underweight”. I did as I was instructed and gained 46 lbs. Little me delivered a 9lb.baby boy via c-section. I bounced back quickly and after 9 months, I was 93 lbs. and expecting baby boy number two. At 17, I vaginally delivered my 10 lb. baby boy.

After, the c-section and getting so big with my 10 lb. baby, my 17 year old body was shot. At 17, this is not the way your body was supposed to look. Although, I lost my weight, my body was stretched and saggy. Life went on, but I was always self conscious about my body image.

Years later, I was in a relationship with the man that I married. We were expecting an oopsie in January 2001. It took me having to bury my son at 17 weeks gestation and a late miscarriage one year later, for me to say to myself that these babies are too precious to worry about body image. I would give anything to just have a baby. I no longer cared what my body looked like or what aches and pains I would endure, I just wanted a baby. Three weeks after my D&C, I was expecting my 4th son. I had another miscarriage after him and then I was expecting my 5th son. After mine and my husbands divorce, we were expecting once again, another oopsie, number 6. Our after divorce relationship only lasted until my 6th son was 3 weeks old. Divorces are always for a reason.

Six boys later, eight pregnancies later, I was single and my body image was once again an issue. What man in his right man would want a woman with so much luggage and an after baby body like mine?
I found him when I wasn’t looking. He has five children himself. Even with his encouragement about the fact that my body was just fine. I still wanted to lose weight, I even bought myself a breast augmentation. I knew that the new and improved boobies would divert attention away from my mid-section.

Three and a half years later we are expecting a baby any time now. Someone on my pregnancy forum posted your site. It was the most wonderful thing I have seen. SOAM opened my eyes again and widely this time. A mother’s body is beautiful. It’s not airbrushed, it’s real. I realized that I am left with the marks that show I am blessed and that my body is able to do the most amazing thing in existence, Create life. I have a new found love for my body. I know there are many women who would sacrifice anything to have a family and it is just not possible for them. Therefore, I am grateful.

I am 30 yrs. old
This is my 9th pregnancy, 7th birth
The ages of my children are, 14, 12, deceased 8-10-00, 8,6, soon to be 4, and baby due 10.22.10

I can not wait to share postpartum pictures.

Thank you for everything, especially this site.

Getting Back the Old Me (Victoria)

I was terrified of what could happen to my body when I was pregnant. I was put on bedrest at 27 weeks and was not kind to my body gaining 50 pounds. I have finally lost most of my pregnancy weight now at almost 2 years postpartum and am so thankful that I have relatively bounced back. I worked hard to get back into shape and hope to inspire others that a little hard work can go a long way!

~Age: 26
~Number of pregnancies and births: 1 pregnancy and birth
~The age of your children, or how far postpartum you are: Almost 2

My pictures:
A shot of my belly minutes before my cesarean
I was so glad to see my belly deflate at 2 weeks postpartum
a closeup of how my belly looks now after several months of hard work
from the side

It’s Hard Not to Notice the Changes (Mary, Mother of Samson)

age: 22
Pregnancies:1 Births :1
My Son Samson is 7 months old
Delivered C-Section

First of all I love being a mother and would not change it for the world! My son is a blessing and I take these scars with pride…most days.

Samson was 9lbs 5 oz when delivered, and I am 5 2′. My stomach was stretched to capacity come time to deliver.

Prior to pregnancy I was 130 lbs. Tiny thing ..I loved trying clothes on and fitting anything I wanted. It is harder now with all the extra skin around my core. I gained 35 lbs with pregnancy. I get unmotivated at times to exercise. I am currently 156 lbs. I miss my old body…it will take work to get it back. I know the stretch marks will take years.

Update (Babs)

Previous entries here, here and here.

When my first son died, shortly after birth, I found too late that the only prints I’d been given from the hospital staff were barely worth calling prints… they didn’t even try to unfold his fingers before taking them, and even inked his knuckles rather than take the extra effort to create something memorable. I had been hoping for something clear and beautiful, but when they handed me the papers, I was devastated.
He left no marks on my body other than an ugly and unnecessary cesarean scar: I had no stretch marks or permanent weight gain, I was longing for something physical to remember him by. I wanted a tattoo of his hand in the place where it had been pressing throughout my pregnancy… but due to the condition of the prints, I didn’t know if this would ever happen.

It’s taken me years of canvasing tattoo artists to find one that was capable of not only reconstructing a good print, but also skilled enough to capture the finer details of it.

With the help of my best friend, who took prints from her newborn daughter to give a template to work from, I took the papers to a new artist in town with an amazing skill in details and shadows. She gave me a perfect copy of the size and shape of his palm… not only that, but she painstakingly worked his palm lines (the only part of his prints that was truly preserved) into the tattoo.

So here’s my fourth submission: about 1.5 months pregnant with baby number four, carrying the extra 20lbs from my last two pregnancies, covered in faded stretch marks, an ugly cesarean scar from an unnecessary surgery I still haven’t recovered from, and finally graced with a mark from my first son’s life.

It’s Not the Same Body, But it’s Fine By Me (Anonymous)

Pre-pregnancy weight: 107
Labor weight: 160
Post-pregnancy weight: 104

I am posting because this site helped me so much. I came here mourning the body I used to have and wondering if I’d ever get it back.

The answer is: it’s not the same body, but in some ways it’s better.

I first came here in despair. I’d gained nearly 60 lbs. through pregnancy; over half my body weight. I was terrified. I’d never been overweight. My body was alien to me and I was scared of losing my husband because I did not remotely resemble myself. Though he would never leave me, my husband is the kind of man to whom physical appearance is very important. When I asked him, six weeks post-partum, when we were going to have sex again, he said: “When you lose the pregnancy weight.” Yes, I gave him hell, and yes he regrets saying it. But that really devastated me.

When nursing didn’t work, it dawned on me I had at least 45 lbs to lose without breastfeeding. I was so ashamed of my body. I hated it. I destroyed every photo of pregnancy and new-motherhood, except the one you see below. I wish I had them now, because I am secure enough to view it. I am not that woman.

Over the course of a year, I lost it all, plus some. I ran an hour every night, five days a week. It helps that I love to run! I did hand weights, yoga, pilates. Ate the food pyramid (www.mypyramid.gov). Today, I weigh my high-school weight. It really took the full year. For those post-partum like me, who are wondering how much can be changed, I cannot get my body back exactly as it was. I think the reason is loose skin from excessive weight gain. I will always have a pooch above the scar and I will always have some crepe paper skin when I bend. I will also, from time to time, always have the niggling voice that erodes my self confidence because my body is not that of a virgin! The smooth, flat tummy is gone. I can say with confidence that I have tried everything. Only a tummy tuck would change this, and I don’t want one. My body, to me (when I am rational!), is just fine. I can rock any outfit I want, including a bikini, and the stretch marks have completely faded. I am stronger than ever, our sex life is better than before, and we have an amazing boy. If I could say anything to new moms whose posts I read here, every day, I would say: Try. Even if you fail, you may really like what you end up with. I absolutely love my body and don’t regret a thing. Thank you to the moms who helped comfort and inspire me!

Age: 34
No. of pregnancies and births: 1/1
Age of children: 17 months

Photos: 3rd Trimester; Weight Loss 14 months PP; Pooch, Scar and Crepe Paper

In Better Shape – Update (Anonymous)

Previous entry here.

Age :31
1 pregnancy/1birth
a Baby girl,, 4 mo pp

I posted on here for the first time a month ago,, grateful for this site,, but a mite obsessed with getting back into shape as quickly as possible. And even though im still not where i want to be physically,, the condition of my heart, mind and soul are much improved,, causing me to almost change shape in my own eyes. For the first time in my life , i feel ‘womanly’ ,, ive had a moment or two in the past where i felt ok about my figure,, even a tad appreciative.. but not as strongly as i do now. My body brought forth an adorable, healthy, smart baby girl who gives all those around her joy! It went through an unplanned C section, and healed quickly with no complications! and even though i wasnt able to continue breastfeeding past the first two weeks,, It still provided my daughter with those first vitamins she coudnt get from any store! I still plan on eating healthy and getting exercise (and yes,, not too happy with the added cellulite lol) but im not going to lose precious sleep and time with my daughter trying to get six pack abs or a rock hard body,, i actually think my husband enjoys me new softness. He s like a little juiciness anyways lol :) So to all of you struggling with body image, self esteem and PPD, know it can be overcome through surrounding yourself with positive, supportive people,, prayer and meditation and little bit of kicking yourself in the rear to get in gear and appreciating your body for the miracle it produces!! Be Blessed all!

Pics: Pre- pregnancy,, 36 weeks and laying out…bath time!,, reading with mom… now, four months pp

New Found Respect for My Body (Proudmama)

Age: 31
Number of pregnancies and birth: 1
Age of my child: 10 months old
Cesarean birth

Almost 10 months ago I finally realized my biggest dream: to be a mom. Most kids grow up wanting to be rock stars or doctors, I wanted to be a mother. From the moment I met my husband I knew he was going to be the father of my children. It took us 8 years to conceive a child (because of circumstances, not fertility issues) but our daughter was well worth the wait.

Before getting pregnant, I never gave much thought as to how pregnancy would affect my body. I’d gain a bit of weight in my mid-twenties but at just over 5’3 I weighted around 125-130, my stomach was flat and I was overall satisfied with my body. I’ve never been one to work out much so I can’t say that my body was in its best shaped but it looked good to me. Now looking back, I wished I’d worked out and had gotten stronger abs before I got pregnant…But I can’t go back.

My pregnancy was a dream; no nausea or heartburn or any real discomfort except for general aches and insomnia. I however grew an incredibly huge belly. People asked all the time how many babies I was carrying. I didn’t gain that much weight (25-30 pounds) but I was carrying it all in front of me. I also didn’t develop any big stretch marks (just a few on my breast and thighs) so people kept telling me how lucky I was, but I just knew that I would be left with extra skin just looking at that big beautiful belly.

I was pregnant for almost 42 weeks, my little one just didn’t want to come out. They finally did an emergency c-section and my big beautiful baby girl came out weighing 9.2 lbs and measuring 22 inches. I could not believe how long and adorably chubby she was. Today you wouldn’t be able to tell by looking at her but I guess I needed a giant belly to accommodate such a big baby.

The day after I got home, my c-section wound opened up and I lost quite a bit of blood. For almost two months I had a nurse come by my home to take care of my wound and it took another few weeks after that to heal properly. Needless to say it took me a while before I could do any kind of real exercising. Just walking up the stairs was enough to open up the wound at first. After the wound healed, the state of my belly left me in shock. I expected a lot of things but I didn’t expect that much extra skin and that huge roll of fat on top of my scar my scar. Plus I had a pretty bad case of diastasis recti (abdominal muscles separation) that did nothing to make me feel better. Losing the weight was easy since I hadn’t really gained anywhere else but the tummy area, but I looked nothing like my former self. It was disconcerting to actually weight less than before but look fatter.

I had a really easy baby from the start so that helped a lot. She’s always been such a happy and smiley baby and of course I knew that I’d do it all over again, but it was still hard to see my deformed belly. I felt like I lived a double life, underneath clothing (and sturdy underwear) I could easily hid my belly and pretend all was well but I was always very self-conscious and had a really hard time finding clothes that fit properly around my mid-section.

It took me months to accept that my body was never to going to go back to its former shape and I now allow myself to wear whatever I want and I don’t feel the need to hide under bulky clothes. I have a healthy lifestyle, I still don’t like the gym but I make it a point to be active everyday and I eat well. My daughter and my husband are my whole world and they make me feel beautiful everyday. I now can look at my body and be proud of it, especially when I look at pictures and realized just how huge my belly was during my pregnancy and how it looked in the first few months after.

I do want more children and I know my body will keep changing. But I truly feel like being a mom is my calling in life and if it means having a less than perfect body, then that’s fine with me. I hope my story helps you accept your beautiful mother’s body, I know all of your stories definitely helped me through some rough times.

Peace

-First picture is at 7.5 months pregnant.
-Second and third are now, 10 months postpartum.
-Last but not least, the beautiful smile that makes it all worth it. :)

Updated here, here, and here

My Self-Esteem is Shattered (Ann)

Age: 26
1 Pregnancy, 1 Birth
4 weeks postpartum (post partum pictures taken at 2 weeks)

I have always been a thin girl without trying, my weight was a complete non-issue and I have always been very confident. When I found out I was pregnant I wasn’t worried about gaining weight, I thought it would be fun to be round and jolly for a while. I thought “chubby” pregnant women were really cute and I looked forward to being one. However, everyone else in my life seemed to have other ideas. I started gaining weight extremely fast, probably about 20 pounds in the first trimester alone. My husband remarked “Sooo, that’s all the weight you will gain and everything else will just go to your belly, right?” He said he felt bad for coworkers whose wives got really big during/after pregnancy. That was the first clue that people would be more concerned with my weight than I was.

My ‘friends’ and some family seemed delighted that the lifelong thin girl was now getting fat and made lots of fat jokes and dropped things like “Oh I thought you would be a skinny pregnant chick” and “Wow, I weigh less than you for the first time, can I have your old clothes?” People started calling me “Big Mama” and “Kool Aid Man” when I wore red. Midway through my pregnancy my husband said “My friend’s wife only got a big belly, when she turns around you can’t even tell she is pregnant. I’ve seen lots of women like that, how do THEY do it?” Obviously implying that THOSE women can stay slim while pregnant so why can’t you? It was endless comments from everyone in my life. I finally brought up to my husband how much it hurt when he said things like that and he was horrified that it cut me so deeply but the damage was done, for the rest of my pregnancy no matter how many times he told me I was the most beautiful pregnant woman he had ever seen I knew he was secretly thinking about how fat I was getting.

At 15 weeks I had a subchorionic hemmorhage after running to catch a train and my doctor recommended taking it easy, so I was scared to be too active lest it trigger more bleeding and a miscarriage. Then we moved from the city to the suburbs so instead of walking everywhere I was driving and sitting around a whole lot more so that obviously didn’t help me out physically. I’m 5’10” and I don’t know what I weighed pre-pregnancy (like I said, I never cared about weight before so I hadn’t been on a scale in about 5 years) but I think it was somewhere around 145, which looks a bit too thin in pictures so I don’t mind if I don’t get that small again. I ended at 215 so I reckon I gained 60 or 70 pounds. I wasn’t retaining any water and had no swelling at all so that was all a tiny baby and lots of fat. On the plus side, I only got a few stretchmarks on my hip/love handle area very early on until I started using pure coconut oil religiously and after that I never got another single stretchmark.

My 6lb 7oz baby was born (triggering comments like “I can’t believe the baby was so small, you were HUUUUUGE!) and I didn’t immediately drop the 20 or 30 pounds that everyone says they lose in the beginning. I only lost about 12 pounds (probably solely the baby/placenta weight) the first week and in the 4 weeks since, haven’t lost another single pound despite eating ~1800 calories a day, walking and breastfeeding. Family keeps asking what I plan to do to get my figure back because in my family appearance and weight is really important. I feel so ugly and trapped in my own body. I avoid being photographed. I don’t feel like myself and even worse is the guilt over how silly and vain I must be to worry about this. I should be grateful that I have a beautiful, healthy baby, not obsessing over fitting into a normal size pair of pants and hoping that my husband doesn’t find me repulsive.

Was everyone on a mission to destroy my confidence and give me a body image complex? If so, congratulations, my self-esteem is shattered!

The pictures are from pre-pregnancy, 38 weeks pregnant and 2 weeks post-partum.

Updated here.