Pregnant

Irish twins and a body that will never be the same (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Postpartum, Pregnant, Second Pregnancy, Submissions 5 Comments

Age: 24
Number of Pregnancies: 2, Births 2

I have always been very skinny, being a gymnast I basically lived in a gym. I did gymnastics in college, which is were I met my husband. I got pregnant with my first child my jr year of college. She was a surprise as I had an IUD (copper), My body rejected it and I had to get it removed. I found out a month later I was 6 weeks pregnant with my peanut. I had a very stressful pregnancy, my husband was in the middle of a messy divorce, I was trying to finish school, and working. The pregnancy was very hard on my body, I was so sick the first three months I vowed to never have another child again. Before I got pregnant I was 118 pounds at 5’6 inches tall. I gained 54 pounds with my daughter most of which was water. I didn’t get a single stretch mark till after I had her, in a matter of a few days about 5 to be exact I lost 40 pounds my stomach shrank to quickly that I got shrink marks. ( as my husband calls them) After I had my daughter I was in love, I had never felt that instant love with someone before. I could hold her and stair at her for hours, she was my baby, and I loved her.

When she was three months old, my husbands company got sold and he was laid off. Three weeks before he was laid off I found out I was pregnant again, even though I was on birth control. My family wanted me to get an abortion since I was in my senior year of college and he had lost his job. I made the appointment but couldn’t go through with it. I have always felt that God has a plan, and he never gives me anything I can not get through. Even though I went through alot. We ended up moving from NC, to NJ where he finally got a job. He moved 2 months before I did, because I had to finish up my last semester in college. I was so stressed out, caring for a baby, being pregnant, finishing up school, applying for grad schools, having to pack our whole house, and move us alone. It was a lot. When I got to NJ, I didn’t know anyone. It was Dec 1st and freezing. I quickly joined a gym, as I have always loved to work out. With my son I gained 30 pounds. My delivery was pretty funny. I actually kicked the doctor out of the room b/c he wanted to give me a C-section for his own selfish will. I had a baby 11 months prior I knew what I was doing. I’m not sure if anyone else has exspeanced NJ doctors, but they are not the brightest of the bunch. The doctors did not listen to me when I said I needed to push, they told me it was two soon and they just checked me I was only 5 CM and that he wasn’t ready yet. I yelled at the nurse and told her he was coming, she tried to prove me wrong by checking to tell me I was still only 5 cm, and his head was crowning. She told me not to push, b/c the doctor was getting an OR. When your baby is right at the end you can not, not push, it is physcially impossible. He was out two seconds later, I pulled him out and held him right away. He screamed and latched on to feed before he was even cleaned off. He was my baby boy.

After I had my son I was ready to get back in the gym, with my daughter I was able to work out 2 days after she was born, but I felt so sick and run down with an almost 1 year old, and a newborn. IT took about 2 weeks before I got back into the gym. I did and still do work out 2 hours a day, 6 to seven days a week. It is Me time. With two babies, two step children, a house, husband, and grad school, I need me time, or I will explode… I’m only 24, that is a lot to take on. My sisters have been angry with me for working out, they don’t understand the good feelings that I get from working out. I don’t drink, I don’t go out, I don’t party, or do anything that my friends my age do. Yet they think it would be more exseptable to drink everyday then to go to the gym. NOw I don’t workout for the satisfactory of looking good, I just really enjoy working out. It makes me feel great, physically, mentally, and emotionally. I lost all my baby weight after about 3 months. Went back to a size zero, and started to look like my old self again. However, my boobs have dropped, they use to be “porn star” like according to my husband and they now look like tear drops. My stomach skin will never go away, when I bend over it makes a gross feeling flap. I have stretch marks on my stomach, which I have grown to love because they are my daughter, when she gets older I can tell her that they are for her. I hate that my body will never be the same. I know I look good for having two babies back to back, but i’m so use to a different body.

Two pics are me 40 weeks pregnant with my son
One pic is from when I was 6 months PP

What Makes Me Valuable? (Ginni)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Pregnant, Submissions

I’m much more superficial than I care to admit, even to myself. I’ve always talked a lot about how looks don’t matter, but it’s easy to say that when you’re skinny without even trying to be. When my husband and I started trying to have a baby, I was thrilled, but I secretly freaked out. I cried and had thoughts like, “I should have waited and had more fun before ruining my body.”

At some point I accepted that my body might never be the same. Immediately after giving birth, I was horrified by my body–my stomach felt like a deflated balloon, my bellybutton poked out, I couldn’t fit my rings onto my fingers. But I was also madly in love with my daughter and wondering how life could ever have existed without her. In the days after her birth, I told my husband, “If my body looks like this for the rest of my life, it will be so worth it to have her.”

Over the next few weeks, I was excited to find my body returning to normal. That was when I started hearing comments. Inevitably, it was “I hate you.” It’s always said in a meant-to-be-joking way, but with an undercurrent of truth. It hurts me more than it should and makes me feel like I don’t have a right to be insecure about the ways that my body HAS changed. My breasts are loose and saggy after a feeding and I know that’s how they’ll look when I’m done nursing. My old jeans give me a muffin top. I worry that when I get pregnant again in a year or two, my body won’t “bounce back” the way it did this time. Even more than that, it worries me that I care so much. I don’t want my happiness to be tied to what I think I “should” look like. And most importantly, I don’t want my sweet girl to learn from me that she has to look a certain way if she’s going to love herself.

Pictures: 37 weeks pregnant; 1 month postpartum; my daughter at 7 weeks

~Your Age: 21
~Number of pregnancies and births: 1

4 Years Later… I Am Still Afraid of Showing My Body (Natalie G)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Pregnant, Submissions 1 Comment

Age 26
Number of pregnancies : 2 preg. 1 birth
Child: 4 years old. 48 months 1 week PP

Four years and 1 week ago (as of 11/08/11) I gave birth to the most amazing kid in the world. My son Jacob, who is the sweetest little boy ever, weighed in at 9lbs 11 oz and 21.5 inches long. He was 11 days early. I went to the dr on October 29 and I was at 80% effaced and 3 cm dilated. He was going to induce me on Monday November 5th. Apparently my little guy heard that and said NOPE! I am coming out in 2 1/2 days! I had a bloody show on Weds, Halloween, Oct 31, 2007. thought it wasnt much and dr’s assistant told me to roll on the exercise ball. So I went to the movies that night, with my mom and mother in law. We went to dinner first and then I started to have contractions. When we got out of the movies, my mom asked me how I was. I said, im having contractions. Her reaction… “you’re not in labor. We have been to the hospital 3 times for false labor! you’re fine!” So we went home at around 10:20. About 12:45 i went to the kitchen and had some pepsi. Went back upstairs and went back to bed. Around 2:16 I woke up to a huge POP! I thought maybe my bladder had exploded. I ran to the bathroom down the hall and grabbed my underwear. It was my water breaking! I yelled down the hall to my mom who didnt answer because she was asleep. Ran to her room, dripping all the way. “MoM! My water broke! Here’s my undies to prove it!” I called my husband as I got ready to go to the hospital. I said to him “hey im having your kid! get to the hospital!” (we were separated at the time) So we got in the van and I texted my best friend and called my mother in law (who would coach me thru the birth). We got to the hospital around 3:15 ish. I was 4 cm and 95% effaced. So then my husband showed up. I was having the worst back labor. My mom and my husband were making bets on the weight of the baby. Around 5 I had the epidural because the back pain was so bad and then my mom decided to go home and take a shower and nap. She would come back around 7. My mother in law joined us at 5:15 and helped me thru that. Around 650 my mom was just half a mile down the road with a breakfast sandwich for my hubby . He called her and said “mommy shes ready to go.” I was at 9 cm and ready to go. I pushed for 2 hours and then around 9:15 my dr said he would use the vacuum. The first one didnt work… so he tried another. Then that didnt work because my baby had so much hair. so he said I could keep pushing or use the forceps. So I chose the forceps to get the baby out. Apparently he had done an episiotomy on me (which i didnt want but no choice in the matter!) At 9:40 my baby boy was born and he was a BIG BABY for 11 days early! My mother in law and my husband were with me the whole time while my mom sat on the side (she didnt wanna see my va jay jay because she was scared lol). Dr was cleaning me up and I asked how big he was. 9 pounds! 11 ounces!? that is one BIG BABY! But he was perfect!!!!!!! So thats my birth story. My son is now 4 and is in preschool. He wants a sister but that’s not coming through anytime soon! I love my son with all my heart. I would not change it for the world.

First photo: 4 years 1 week PP
2nd photo: My baby after he was born
3rd photo: me at 2 weeks pre birth
4th photo: my son at 4 years old

I Just Don’t Feel Good Anymore (Tawnya)

Bonnie (SOAM) No Photos (Story Only), Postpartum, Pregnant, Second Pregnancy, Submissions 6 Comments

Age: 20
Number of births: 1
Age of child: 1 year

My name is Tawnya, I just turned 20 and I’m a mother of a beautiful 1 yr old girl. I was 120lbs before I got pregnant, I was in a size 3. I gained 80lbs during my pregnancy. I’m just struggling with the way my body looks now (I’ve only lost 30lbs), I have stretchmarks everywhere and I just found out that I’m pregnant again. My family told me not to worry that I was young and my body would bounce back into shape, so I waited and waited nothing happened. I feel so ashamed of my body now and it seems like no one understands at all. Some of my friends had babies too and they didn’t get horrible looking stretch marks or gained a bunch of weight, no they were back in their pre-pregnant clothes just weeks after having their children. My boyfriend doesn’t understand either he tries to but in the end he has no clue about how I feel. I try to fix myself up, do my hair, dress nice but I still feel repulsive. I was starting to feel a little better about myself when I was loosing weight, but when I found out I was pregnant again it devastated me. I feel like I’m never going to feel good about myself again and the way I feel about my looks is taking a toll on my relationship. I love being a mom don’t get me wrong but I hate what the process of becoming one did to my body. I just feel so alone in everything I’m going through. This is the first time I can actually freely express myself and I hope someone out there knows what I’m going through and can give me some advice.

Deeper Than My Skin (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Before Pregnancy, Belly, Child Loss, Pregnant, Submissions, Third Pregnancy 26 Comments

As I sit here now, needing to reach out to those who may understand, those who may be able to share guidance, I am 27 years old and 6 months pregnant with my third baby.

To put briefly what has led me to this point in the simplest way is this: I met my husband 3 years and 7 months ago, we have been married for 3 years and one month, we have a 2.7 year old son, we lost a baby boy at 19 weeks in january and just before our sons first birthday I discovered that my husband had been sneaking porn and when confronted he looked into my eyes and lied… again and again over the next year. This completely destroyed my trust in him and also my self worth. It has been a battle to open his eye’s to how disrespected I feel. Had he been open and honest about it things would have been very different. As it is now I am in a state of anxiety most days, our relationship is simply woeful.

All I want is to feel respected and truly loved… that’s not more than I deserve is it?

Today he told me that he is ‘not into me’ anymore, that he loves me and wont leave me but just ‘isnt into me’. It felt like a knife through my heart. I use to be everything to him, and now I just feel like a train wreck, a mess of a person with emotions that are all over the place and uncontrollable. On the outside you would not think that I had such low self-esteem, such desperate thoughts and that some days I wish I simply didn’t exist… people on the street come to tell me how beautiful I am, but this makes no difference to the deep hurt that is basically eating away my sense of self. I feel like a shell of a person with nothing to offer. I have no friends, no one to turn to when desperation finds me crying on the floor. My husband does’nt comfort me, he doesn’t want to anymore…

I have come to realise that it doesn’t matter what you look like on the outside, if your partner isn’t attracted to the inner you your screwed. I cant love myself, I don’t feel beautiful and I feel so guilty for the effects this all has on our son and my little one who I know feels everything that I feel.

This pregnancy means so much to me, I was desperate after loosing our little boy to feel ‘full’ again. I do feel so blessed to be pregnant and am enjoying crocheting nappy covers and planning another homebirth etc But in this moment I’m hurting and am struggling. I imagined that being pregnant again would have my husband and I reconnect, that he would view me in a new light and all would be well… wishful thinking. I hope so much that I have a more positive view of myself by the time labour arrives, feeling this pathetic will have such a terrible effect on giving birth and bonding.

At the end of the day it doesn’t matter what you look like or how ‘lucky’ or ‘unlucky’ you may think yourself to be after having a child, all that truly matters is the way you feel about yourself and having your partner appreciate, respect and love you for you. If the way I felt on the inside showed on the outside I would not be getting compliments. I feel like a hideous person. I feel that something is so wrong with me that I cant even let myself befriend anyone.

I feel that my outside appearance is a lie. I will attach a couple of photo’s of me taken a couple of weeks ago and a before pic… If I was to be honest about the way I look then I would say I have very little to complain about, as with any woman there are things I would change, such as the cellulite on my thighs, my breasts that are completely covered in stretch marks (I’m not exaggerating!) and my hereditary double chin from my great granny… but to feel adored, respected and wanted for the person I am inside would mean so very much more.

Three Boys (Ashley)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Postpartum, Pregnant, Submissions, Teen Mom, Third Pregnancy 5 Comments

I’m a 26 yr old mother too soon to be three boys. I weighted 96lbs before I got pregnant at 19 and I’m 4’11. I gained 55lbs with my first son Corbyn who is 6 now and he weighted 7lbs 9 oz and was 20 3/4 in long. After him it took a year but I lost down to 92lbs I didn’t work out it just came off from working and from stress and yes I had skin hanging and stretch marks that stayed from the middle of my calf’s to the top of my breasts and yes everywhere in between there even to my crotch. I had my second son Jake at 24 who now is 2 I weighted 102lbs when I got pregnant with him and gained 44lbs with him he weighted 6lbs 11oz and was 21 3/4 in long. I only lost 20 pounds from his pregnancy and everything was still left from the first pregnancy meaning stretch marks and skin. They both were vaginal deliveries and I have noticed the damage it has made too my body but you know what I wouldn’t change any of it and really the only thing that bothers me every now and again is the extra skin only because its hard to find jeans. I love my boys and its all worth it even the sagging breast :) I’m now 34 weeks pregnant with my third boy and I have gained 20lbs so far due to GD I probably would have gained more but I’m on the GD diet and don’t want to take insulin so I’m sticking too it :) Ladies there is no shame in the way our bodies look we are mothers and that is a beautiful gift some women would give anything to look like us just to have the beautiful baby that comes with it remember that !!!

Defeat and Angels (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Before Pregnancy, Belly, Breasts, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Pregnant, Submissions 34 Comments

Age: 22
Pregnancies/Births: 1/1
Age of child/how far pp: 3 months

I was 21 when I found out I was pregnant, and though it was not planned we could not have been happier. I had always wanted a baby, and now I was going to be a mother! The pregnancy was very easy and I went on to deliver a healthy baby girl at 37 weeks. Though I never had any medical or health problems during my pregnancy I did have self esteem problems. I always had what I considered the perfect body before pregnancy. I was 5’6″ and 115lbs. I was lean and toned, with curvy hips and perfectly round perky breasts. I had 36 inch hips and a 20 inch waist. I loved being able to throw a bikini on and turn heads with no effort. I never had to work for my body, it just was, and I loved it.

Little by little during my pregnancy the weight added up. 5 lbs this month. 7 the next. Until at 37 weeks I topped out at a weight gain of 53 lbs. Every pound was like a punch in the stomach. I hated it. I was watching my figure vanish under the perfect little person that I loved so dearly. I went 36 weeks without a single stretch mark. That was what kept me hopeful the entire time. I knew that if I could avoid stetch marks, then there was a chance I would someday feel pretty again. Then suddenly, almost overnight, they were there. All over my lower stomach. My sides, my thighs and on the back of my knees. I cried harder than I have ever cried before when I saw those horrible streaks across my skin. I delivered one week later.

I am currently 3 months postpartum and having a very hard time accepting my new body. Everything is different. My bone structure has changed, my hips and rib cage are inches wider, my stomach is flabby and not smooth, my skin is textured and uneven. My breasts, which I now hate, went from a B cup to a DD and now sag. I have cried every time I have taken a shower since the day she was born. I cannot look in the mirror when I am naked. Even though my husband will tell me every day that I am beautiful and perfect, I will not let him touch my stomach because I don’t want him to feel my skin. He used to joke that I was his trophy wife, and he wanted to take me every where he could and show me off. I feel like I ruined those dreams for him. I am no longer the trophy wife he married, but I am the woman with the stretch marks who should never be seen in a bathing suit ever again.

I weigh 125 lbs now, only 10 lbs more than before I got pregnant. I have breast fed my baby since the day she was born, and I believe that helped some, but I can not seem to lose the other 10lbs, and I fear that even if I do I will still never fit my old cloths, I will never have smooth soft skin ever again, and I will never be as little as I was. I fear that even though I love my baby and my husband more than life itself, that I will never be able to love my body. I will never have self confidence. I will never feel beautiful or pretty, and sexy is a word that will never be uttered in my direction. Maybe I sound vain and petty? Maybe I do. But these feelings that I live with every day, they do not feel so petty to me. When society has been screaming at you since you were 5 that you must look this way to be beautiful, and the mirror is screaming at you that you will never even be close, it does not feel petty. It feels like defeat.

Even though I feel this way about my body, I am determined to hide it from my daughter. I want to teach her that she does not have to look like the girls in magazines and on the t.v. That she is perfect just as she is. I know this is going to be hard to do when I can not even tell myself that, but I am determined. Afterall, the only thing that keeps me going is the enormous amount of love that I have for my daughter and my husband. I do not think I would be here today without them. They are my world. They are my angels. I live to see the smiles on their faces, and even though I look at myself and feel like I am all used up, I would not change anything, because doing so would mean that I would not have my little family. My little world.

The first two pictures are from before pregnancy, and then three are of the stretch marks and the extra weight at 3 months pp, and the last one is me at 36 weeks.

Sad But Not Giving Up Hope (Anon)

Bonnie (SOAM) African American, Before Pregnancy, Belly, Breasts, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Pregnant, Submissions, Update 7 Comments

I’m writing to you all the from Jamaica. I’m 23 years old and 3 weeks 1 day postpartum. Maybe its too early for me to submit my story since I’ve not yet healed properly, but I just wna share my story.

Also, I must say that I read the stories of other strong beautiful mothers daily. Its very encouraging and helps me to embrace my body. So maybe my story will encourage you. My mother also encourages me a lot. She has 3 of us, when she was my age (23) she was done with kids. She is still suffering with her image and insomnia to this day. But no one knows unless she tells them. When she sees her children, all grown up, she says she’s nevr been happier.

I got pregnant December last year for my boyfriend of 2 yrs, I nevr wanted kids, I love my freedom, and loved my body even more. It made me, me. A confident individual. A bit too confident maybe. Before getting pregnant I was 137 pounds, 182 pounds at 39 weeks. I’m 5’5″. During my pregnancy I worried about stretch marks, the most, I rubbed my belly with olive oil and cocoa butter almost evry day. Initially, I had a small belly, at 6 months my fundal height was 13 inches. In just a few weeks my belly skyrocketed. At first they came on my sides. They were real small, and right before my eyes, they exploded. I thought I cud wrk with tht. But not on my belly please stay away. I also got them on my legs and calves. But not my belly.

I was happy that my chances of escaping stretch marks on my belly. At 38 weeks pregnant my doc said he’d induce me at 39 weeks. My baby’s head was in the birth canal, and could come at anytime, I lived abt 45 mins from the hospital, he didn’t want any accidents, so thts the reason I was induced.

I got home from my 38 week check up, laying in bed, my mom expressed shock, she saw lines on my belly, one more week to go, and they had to show up there ugly selves. I cried that night. I was crushed. Depressed. My mother comforted me, told me wen I have my baby I’ll appreciate it. I started having nightmares, because I was so deep in thought tht my bf may not want me any more. He nver liked big girls. I told him how I felt, told him my nightmares. He told me id be fine and should not worry. When he saw the marks, he laughed and asked me if that was really why I was behaving like that. It made me smile. He even bought me oils and creams tht would help get them off. I’ve not seen any improvements yet, but its just been 3 weeks. 6 days after giving birth I weighed 165 pounds.
My boyfreind tells me to be patient, and tht I’ll be fine. Even though my body won’t go back to normal, I’m now a mother, so I’ll hv a body thts considered normal for my new role in life.

I had a problem free pregnancy, smooth delivery. Painful, but worth evry second, I thank God.
I gave birth to a beautiful baby boy weighing 8 pounds 4 ounces on the 9th of september, 10 days before my 23rd bday, the 19-9. I love him so much, he has made me appreciate life so much more, he makes me smile evryday. I’m happy I have him. And evry one says he looks just like me.
I promise to keep u posted.

The first 3 pics: pre preggo
4th: day after delivery
5th: 10 days after delivery
6th: 11 days after delivery
7th: side stretch marks
8th: full body
9 & 10th: 2 weeks 3 days after delivery, belly up close
11th: my sweetie pie
12 &13: 38 & 39 weeks

Updated here.

The beauty of my twin shaped body. (Stephanie M)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Pregnant, Submissions, Teen Mom, Twins 7 Comments

This was my first pregnancy and I was 19. I had complication after complication. First I ended up in the hospital at 8 weeks because they thought I was miscarrying, only to find out I had been blessed with not one baby, but two! Now before 19, I was a runner and in shape. I couldn’t have asked for a more perfect body if I tried (sorry if that sounds like bragging..), and when I found out I was pregnant, I was terrified. In my mind I was going to be the size of a house with one baby growing in my belly, so what would two do to me?! But then I just started to grow, normally. I didn’t get too big too fast, or so I thought (looking back at the pictures I really did.. haha). But I was so sick throughout the entire pregnancy that because I would step on the scale and have lost weight, I didn’t really notice. As time went by, at around 20 weeks, I started to notice that my normal clothes didn’t fit anymore, but hey – that was normal. Then by 25 weeks, my maternity clothes didn’t fit anymore. By the time I was 30+ weeks, I wasn’t going outside much because I was so big it was hard to move around, so I just stayed in and wore PJ pants and night gowns all the time. My strangest memory was going out at Christmas time, which was 12 weeks before I had my boys, and buying a shirt that was sized 2X, and two weeks later, I didn’t have a hope or prayer that it would fit me. So, skipping the last few weeks until I was 36 weeks pregnant. It was about 2am and I was in the worst pain I have ever felt in my life. I couldn’t move, I couldn’t breathe, I was pretty well not functioning. So off to the hospital we went. After a few hours of testing, I found out that I was severely anemic, and if I didn’t get a blood transfusion right away, I could die during my c-section. (For those of you who don’t know much about anemia, your blood iron levels [hemoglobin] are supposed to be around 140-150, mine was at 68. When you go into a surgery it drops down 20-30 more, and around the 40 mark is where you drop into a coma. Oh yea, super fun hey?) So that was 3 days spent in the hospital, but then I was good, I was ready to go. And I felt great! So two and a half weeks later, on March 16th, 2011 (just 3 days after my 20th birthday), I went in at 6am to be prepped and have my boys. At this point I was still super disappointed I had to do the c-section and didn’t get to do it natural, because I was told I could have gotten back to a workout routine sooner with a natural birth.. but oh well, it had to happen for their safety and hey, I still had breast feeding to help me lose weight! Well, that didn’t work out either.Come to find out that because of my anemia and a few complications with the surgery, I was left unable to breast feed. So there went that idea. But I made it through all of that, and I had two gorgeous little men to show for it. Dominic Gerald Michael Peddle-McLeod born at 8:40am at 6pounds 9ounces, and James Ronald Alexander Peddle-McLeod born at 8:41am at 7pounds 14ounces.

Now, I am 6 1/2 months PP, and still working on getting this body back to normal. Some days are a sad struggle, wishing I was what I used to be, but then I remember what came out of it, and I’m alright again.

picture order.
1 – 12 weeks pregnant.
2 – 18 weeks pregnant.
3 – 26 weeks pregnant.
4 – 37 weeks pregnant.
5 – 38 weeks pregnant.
6 – about 8 hours after birth, my two boys.
7 – my boys now, at 6 months.
8 – me now at 6 months PP.

Learning to Love My Pregnant Body (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, First Pregnancy, Pregnant, Submissions 6 Comments

Age: 24
1st pregnancy; 25 weeks along

I’ve always been naturally skinny. I guess you could blame good genetics. I’m almost 5’9″ and have always weighed anywhere from 124-128. As of right now I am 25 weeks pregnant and I’ve already gained 22 pounds! (150 lbs) I am having such a hard time loving this temporary but new body of mine. I always thought that I would be so cute pregnant…all belly! Well that is not the case! My butt, hips, & thighs have expanded just as much as my belly has. I had to stop wearing shorts at around 13 weeks because my once smooth butt and thighs now have dimples galore! I feel like I am not able to 100% enjoy my pregnancy because I’m so worried about how I look now, what I’ll look like towards the end, & if I’ll be able to get my body back after my son is born. I think about it everyday and I know that may make me seem shallow or vain/conceited but I want to be able to look in the mirror and be happy with what I see! I want my husband to be attracted to me. Finding this website has truly been a gift. Although I am still not completely happy with my growing body my outlook as truly changed. I’m starting to understand that this body that I despise so much is giving me my greatest gift ever and that I should embrace it and know that it will all be worth it. I admire all of the strong, beautiful women on this site & would love to receive more advice and words of wisdom because I know that things are just gonna get better from here!!