First Pregnancy

Trying Really Hard to Accept My Body (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Cesarean, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Pregnant, Submissions, Tattoo 17 Comments

I haven’t felt anywhere near beautiful since I had my son almost 4 months ago. I was never planning on having kids right now, and my boyfriend and I were really surprised 2 days after last Thanksgiving. He was upset and didn’t want to have the baby, but I could never imagine getting rid of a life that never even began. I don’t regret a thing and I love my son more than anything in the world. However I am very unhappy with myself. Before I was pregnant I was 5’4 and 115 lbs..I shot up to 169 and delivered a 8lbs 6 oz 21 1/2 inch baby boy via c-section after being in labor for almost 3 days. I’m having a tough time accepting my body. It’s even harder when I have a mother who makes comments such as “Wow, you must be eating well, you looked like you’ve gained more weight”. I’m terribly uncomfortable with my stomach and this new found muffin top, mommy’s apron, and stretch marks I have. My thighs are even covered in deep stretch marks. I’ll never wear shorts or a bikini again. I even got the stretch marks on my arms! Every time I go out I try to cover my stomach as much as possible. I hate how much it bulges out when I sit down. All my tattoos are ruined as well. I sometimes think I might need some kind of therapy, because no matter how many people tell me I look okay, I don’t think so at all…I feel so horrible :( Before I was pregnant I was a model and was very into how I looked. Perhaps this might be my payback for being a tad bit vain. At one point I would cry almost every day over my body. I try to tell myself its a badge of honor and so on, but it doesn’t work. I have a lot of respect for the moms out there who do accept their bodies.






Making Progress (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Cesarean, Cesarean Scar and/or Incision, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Submissions, Update 5 Comments

Here’s my previous entry with a link to my previous previous entry, ha ha! Slowly, VERY slowly I’m noticing changes in myself. My stretch marks are finally fading and my belly is actually lifting as terrified as I was that it wouldn’t. I’ve been working out and trying to eat as healthy as possible. So I guess we’ll see how it goes!





I know I’m constantly submitting on here, but I just love this site and what it does for women and there self esteem so when I did this little project for www.Inkymole.com I just had to share it! I think it really says a lot about beauty and the fact that beauty is certainly not always perfection!



Updated here.

37 Weeks Pregnant (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, First Pregnancy, Pregnant, Submissions, Thyroid Issues 4 Comments

Well this is me so far, I am 37 weeks pregnant and I am soo excited to be having my baby boy soon!! I Have gained 25 pounds already i guess i am all belly because my belly is HUGE lol! So far ive not gotten any stretch marks but its genetic in my family to get them and i know they will be coming in the next week or two its very depressing i have also have VERY low self esteem and im so afraid im going to suffer from baby blues very bad!! I probably wont “bounce back” i have a feeling ill have trouble losing weight due to a thyroid problem its hard to main tain my weight or even lose it which is why i suffered from an eating disorder for 3 years but thank god my husband rescused me from myself, or atleast helped a great deal in the end i was the only one who could help myself.. when i get stretch marks im going to have to look at them in a differnt light, i read someone on here say your son is only young once and you have the rest of your life to worry about your body… which made me smile i wish i knew who said that she was very smart and very true!! I have been 1 cm dilated for 2 weeks now im wondering when im going to have him.. i really hope i dont go to 40 weeks.. i know he would be absolutley fine and developed now he is “full term” and if i had him now i know i wouldnt suffer from self esteem problems hearly as bad as i will if i go 3 more weeks or even over due date cause everyone says they wake up the next morning and have stretch marks.. i just wish i could hold him now and look at him.. :) im getting so anxious!!

im including my pregnanct pics so far one at 6 months, 7 months, 8 months 8 1/2 months 9 months and 2 this morning at 37 weeks( all in order)









Fraternal Twins (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Cesarean, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Pregnant, Submissions, Twins, Update 24 Comments

At 8w 3d I found out I was having twins. Something no one can ever be prepared for. Two of everything! Two cribs, two bikes, two high chairs, two carseats, two hugs, two kisses, twice the work, twice the fun! I had my fraternal twin boys at 37 weeks via c-section and they’ve been the most amazing, most wonderful thing that has ever happened to me!






Updated here.

Benefits of Weight Training (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Submissions 5 Comments

I had my daughter 12 years ago at the age of 25. I gained 50+ pounds during my pregnancy. I worked hard to drop the weight, but didn’t discover weight training until last year. This photo was taken 2 months ago after 9 months of training 2-3x a week. You can still see that my stomach pooches out a bit and has stretch marks, but I feel strong. I am 5’4″ and weigh 120lbs. Prepregnancy weight was 110lbs. I weighed 163lbs before giving birth.




belly (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Before Pregnancy, Belly, First Pregnancy, Piercing, Postpartum, Pregnant, Submissions, Teen Mom 8 Comments

i was 19 when i had my little boy. my body has changed and im trying to accept it. im almost at my pre-pregnany weight but my stomach is still mushy and i have soo many stretchmarks all over the place it makes it hard to love. i do however love my son and i wouldnt trade him for anything. if it means that ill have a mushy stomach and a road map on my butt the rest of my life then im just fine with that.







18 Months After CS and a Beautiful Girl… (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Breasts, Cesarean, Cesarean Scar and/or Incision, First Pregnancy, PCOS, Postpartum, Submissions 10 Comments

This is my body now. I hate it. After my CS i was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia and Polycystic ovarie syndrom. Because of the Polyblabla its hard to lose weight, since everything you eat gains on the stomach. I was a size 36(european sizes.. small/medium) the day i had my girl, and the day after i was a size 46. I got a beautiful daughter and a body i hate, that is not mine, but her mothers. I feel so disgraced that she has to live with a mother like me, what will she think? Why me, why did i have to get diseases like that, making me invalid at 25… I try so hard to accept my body, and when i see all the skinny, beautiful women here i tend to get happy but also sad; you all look great!!! Luckily my husband loves me and my body, so i cope “fine” with it, but its a war inside.





One Mental Year Later (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Before Pregnancy, Belly, Breasts, First Pregnancy, Piercing, Postpartum, Pregnant, Submissions 7 Comments

Hi everyone! :) I found this site at the beginning of my pregnancy and thought that now, just past my daughter’s first birthday, would be a fairly apt moment to reflect on this mental year and nine months and make a post myself. I’m 5ft2 ish and I started my pregnancy at 9st (see before photo!) I put on about a stone in the first month then two more by the end – total weight gain of 3 stone or 52lbs !! I was also polyhydramnios (more amniotic fluid than usual) so I was MASSIVE. I thought I had got away without stretchmarks on my tummy until week 36 when they started creeping up from my knicker line. I also have a belly button piercing and that stretched alot. Also, I developed weird stretchmarks on both inner thighs from baout week 26 which got bigger and bigger until my daughter was born. Couldnt understand whay I got them there! I also have more on my hips and LOADS on my boobs, although these have faded quite a bit. My pregnancy went smoothly other than very low blood pressure which left me feeling faint and breathless most of the time from about week 34. I worked until 6 days before my due date and went into natural labour 6 days past my due date. I was due that morning to have a membrane sweep, which I didnt much fancy, so I was quite pleased with Lily’s timing! My waters broke slowly overnght and I gave birth at 18.50 the following evening, with NO PAIN RELIEF AT ALL to my beautiful 8lb 9oz baby girl Lily. She is the most wonderful little girl in the world and most definitely worth it all. I desperately wanted to breast feed but Lily just didnt take to it. The midwife decided to cup-feed her formula for one feed because they were concerned she was hungry and after that she just wanted really interested in trying to feed from me. I was very upset but managed to express breast milk for her for 8 weeks until my supply dried up. Im pleased that she got my breat milk, even thouh it meant milking myself every 90 minutes and feeling somewhat like a cow for 2 months! ;) My body was ‘better’ before in many ways – my tummy was flat and toned and the skin was tight and my boobs stood up more, but honestly Im happier with my body now than I was before. It is just so incredible what our bodies can do – way more amazing than a flat stomach and toned skin. I celebrate my body so much more now and I feel like a whole woman. I have included a before photo, several through my pregnancy and some after pics. :) :) :)


Before
121008-anon-1

39 weeks – two weeks before the birth

3 days PP

25 days PP closeup of tummy

20 weeks

3 photos at one year PP




Learning to Love my 21 Year Old Baby Body (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Before Pregnancy, Belly, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Pregnant, Submissions 16 Comments

I’ve been through a lot in my short 21 years and 10 months here on earth. The good, the bad, the unexpected… In high school I was a 5’3, 117 pound cheerleader with an eating disorder. I was teased when I was younger for being chubby, so I made up for it during my adolescence. I hid the memories of my broken childhood with alcohol, prescription pills, and eventually hard drugs. All of which helped me to maintain my thin frame. When I was 16, I met who would one day become my husband. Fast forward to college, by the time I was a Junior I was 130 lbs. I was okay with this, I had grown out of my self-destructive behavior for the most part, but my weight was still a burden on my mind every day. I was living with my high school sweetheart when we found out we were pregnant on Thanksgiving of 2007. Three semesters away from attaining my degree and suddenly it seemed so far away. I took a year off from school, sat at home and ate, and ate, ate… Over the course of my pregnancy I gained 73 lbs. The day I went into labor I weighed a whopping 203 lbs, most of which I gained in the last 3 months of my pregnancy, leaving me with numerous stretch marks on my hips, my breasts, thighs and calves. Thirty hours of labor and six hours of pushing later, my baby boy was born at 8 lbs 9 oz. and 21 inches. A week later what I was left with was 180 lbs, nearly a hundred stretch marks and some saggy skin. Despite my previous obsession over my body image, I became less concerned with it, and instead focused my attention on my new son. With the help of breastfeeding, I lost nearly 40 lbs in the first two months. My weight loss began to slow, so when I stopped breastfeeding at 3 months post-partum, I began eating healthier. I am proud to say that today, on my son’s 4 month birthday, I weighed in at 145 lbs. I am still overweight for my height; however I have never been more content with or proud of my body. I look at my son everyday with pride, and when I look at my stretch marks they remind me of that precious little face. I am going back to school in January to finish my degree, and thanks to my beautiful little interruption, I have all the motivation I need. The attached pictures are, in order: my pre-pregnancy body, my 38 week pregnant body, my one week pp body, my 1 month pp body, my present body, and my baby boy…