Before Pregnancy

Will I ever find peace with myself? (Megan O)

Bonnie (SOAM) Before Pregnancy, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Pregnant, Submissions 3 Comments

Age:22
1 pregnancy
1 daughter 14 months old

I have always had weight acceptance issues or what have you, but I have always been a very active person and was fit as an adolescent. I grew up in a family where being overweight was normal but for some reason I had issues accepting even the slightest weight gain. When I met my husband I was in the best shape of my life but I could not accept it, I constantly hid my body, did not take a compliment without protesting and you would NEVER catch me in a pair of shorts. I find all of this completely absurd now that I am post partum and the biggest I have ever been in my life. I went into my pregnancy at 5’9″ 179 lbs , ran every day and played basketball for an hours almost every day. I had just ended a long term relationship and took shelter in the comfort of my best friend ( now my husband ; couldn’t be happier). I ended up with a surprise pregnancy which took my family and his parents for a spin and needless to say gave me a good bout of depression. This caused me to take comfort in eating and all exercise and activity ceased. I gained so much weight my doctor told me to “take it easy hunny we still have 12 weeks to go” That moment didn’t help my self esteem and I promised to ease up and start walking but I couldn’t bring myself to do it. I went into the hospital at 244 lbs and had a beautiful healthy baby girl without complication. I couldnt find anything to wear since all my clothes were size 12 jeans and medium shirts, I went to the store and couldn’t fit into size 22 jeans without fat hanging over and this was not something I was comfortable with so I resorted to tight maternity clothes and sweat pants and my fathers old shirts. By October I decided I was going to start to work out and started to drink weight loss shakes. By January I had lost 30 lbs and was down to 215 lbs. I started a Biggest Loser competition at work and convinced everyone it was a quick way for them to win money when really I wanted a support group when it came to eating and exercise and it worked. At the end of the competition I was down to 198 but I was still not happy. I kept looking at the scale and seeing 20 lbs to go rather than being proud of the close to 50 lbs that I had lost. Today I am still at 192lbs and have hit a plateau but I can run 4 miles in 40 minutes and can do 1 hour of power yoga daily. But this is still not good enough for me I will run and critisize my times or say I should have done another hour, I will do Yoga and obsess over doing another hour or working out again that day. I just want to be happy with me, my husband loves me and my curves, my daughter loves me unconditionally no matter who I am and I should do the same. I have my good days and sometimes weeks where I look at myself and see a beautiful woman but some days all I see is ” Bigger than before”

I took the first step to happiness and threw away my scale, I will not let a number dictate my day. I have also promised to tell myself two positive things about myself every time I think negatively of myself. I also remind myself that if a friend said all the bad things about herself in front of my I would tell her no and wouldnt let her do that to herself so why do I allow myself to this to me. Enough is Enough, just like last October when I decided I would work out today I decide that I will workout my mind and spirit. This is more important than my size, this is important for my family and my daughters well being. This matters more than the size of my jeans.

Stretch Marks Are Beautiful! (Ashley)

Bonnie (SOAM) Before Pregnancy, Belly, First Pregnancy, PCOS, Postpartum, Submissions 5 Comments

Age: 22 Pregnancies: 1 Births: 1 age of child: 5 months, 5 months PP

I met my husband while working at a restaurant in my hometown. I was 16 and his parents owned the restaurant. His name is Samuel and he is 7 years my senior, needless to say, everyone doubted our relationship. However, we fell in love very quickly and dated for 3 years before finally tying the knot on June 20, 2009. Very soon after we decided to have a baby. Much to our dismay, we discovered that I have PCOS and getting pregnant would be a difficult task. Being only 19 a few doctors refused to help me (that is a whole other story). Finally, we found a truly wonderful doctor and after almost 2 years of trying we were finally pregnant! My pregnancy was very rough in the beginning. I was very ill most of the day and didn’t sleep well at night… I lost 25 pounds in 2 months. None of that mattered the minute we heard the heartbeat. My husband (who was away on business) drove all the way home to South Carolina from Ohio just the be there! It was a wonderful time… On February 6, 2012 we welcomed Sydney Elisabeth by cesarean… She was health, beautiful and BIG… 9lbs. 7oz and 22 inches long. My figured was ruined lol… At first I struggled with it but my husband is a wonderful man and he tells me everyday that I am still just as beautiful as the day he met me. Sydney is our world and I would do everything the exact same way… My stretch marks may be repulsive to some and I may never wear a bikini again but to me they are a reminder of the most blissful time of my life so far. To me and my Samuel, my body is perfect and my stretch marks are BEAUTIFUL!!

Wishing For Once In My Life I Could Have That Flat Belly Everyone Else Has! (Kylee)

Bonnie (SOAM) Before Pregnancy, Belly, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Pregnant, Submissions, Tattoo 9 Comments

Age: 22
Number of Pregnancies and Births: One Pregnancy and Birth
My Son’s Age: Almost 20 Months
Pre- Preg Weight : 150Lbs
Weight Post Partum : 165Lbs

Hello fellow Mommas! I am new to SOAM as of, well.. now. And Im so happy that I have found a place that I can come to and be myself.. You’re stories are absolutely empowering and I cant believe at how many other women are out there who feel the same way I do everyday!

Well, here it goes.. Before I got pregnant I was with my son’s father for 2 months but we had known each other for approx. 2 years prior to dating. I was about 150 lbs then, my stomach has never been flat ever in my life and i have always had that “pocket” as I would call it. Well during our relationship he would always call me beautiful and sexy, but then he would be texting the same things to his ex girlfriend. Well when I was 3 months pregnant, he was always going to see her and we were always fighting so I left to make life better for my unborn child when he arrived. My son’s fathers ex was a super sized woman when they dated but she had been working out and now is absolutely stunning with her flat tummy and great butt.. As you would guess, this made my esteem lower because clearly he would rather someone with that body type..

As I got bigger and more and more pregnant, he started telling me how fat I looked and how ugly my stretch marks were.. That I started hating myself before my son was even born. I ended up delivering at a hefty 198Lbs. I haven’t been with his father since I was 3 months pregnant and haven’t really had a boyfriend since then either. I feel alone all the time which causes me to be depressed. I feel like no one wants me because of the way I look. I cry every time I look into the mirror. I keep diet jumping or starving myself so that I wont be so ugly anymore. I just wish that someone (a man especially) would come into my life and sweep me off my feet and tell me religiously how beautiful my body is. It is so hard to feel beautiful when you cant even keep a boyfriend while looking the way you do..

Although I don’t like the way that I look right now, I’m sure that being on this site with all of you supportive and beautiful mama’s out there will assist me in gaining better self-esteem. Thank you so much for listening.

Pictures are as follows : Pre pregnancy , While pregnant, Right after birth (pajama pants) , Now(shorts) and (pantless) lol.., And then my beautiful son a couple days ago. <3 [gallery]

Only my partner could love this… before, during and after. (Terri)

Bonnie (SOAM) Before Pregnancy, Belly, Breasts, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Pregnant, Submissions 15 Comments

20 years of age
1 pregnancy, 1 birth to a beautiful baby girl
Baby’s aged 7 weeks.

Whilst I was pregnant I always thought that after the baby was born I could just do a couple of sit ups and i’d get my body back the way it was before. I was applying baby oil religiously every night for the whole of my pregnancy in ingnorance of hoping that
it would prevent stretch marks and I regularly went out for walks to help prevent the belly. Oh how ignorance was bliss! I didn’t get stretch marks on my stomach so I was fooled into thinking i’d be one of the lucky ones. Nope! A couple of days after my baby
was born I got them all over my stomach, all over my boobs and on my thighs. I didn’t even dare look at my bum and look at the dreaded cellulite! Now I find that as much as I love my little bundle of joy I absolutley hate my new body. My confidence now has
a huge dent in it and no matter what my partner says about my body (all of it positive) I still can’t see what he sees. All I see is the rolls of fat when I bend over to my now saggy chest. I’m no longer the confident woman I once was. I get annoyed at everyone
telling me I should be proud because it carried my baby because I was fooled into thinking I should look like all of those celebs that lose it no matter what. I am proud! But I just want to be me again not mum! Even though I am very proud to be a mum.
And also although I am back in my size 8 clothes I can’t help but notice that I now have a bit of skin hanging over my jeans :( And I also would LOVE to have another baby but this has made me scared about what would happen to my body after I have that one.

Never Beautiful Enough (Savannah)

Bonnie (SOAM) Before Pregnancy, Belly, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Submissions, Teen Mom 10 Comments

Age:19/ 4.5 months postpartum
Pregnancies: 1 birth/ 1 miscarriage

It must have been prom night that my son was concieved. Even though my boyfriend and I did not go to prom (in order to save money for a trip to Jamaica) we did look forward to the after parties. The alcohol mixed with the graham crackers and the self-serve packets of tingling lube made for a dizzy night conducive of baby-making. I was just 18 years old. Slim, but not skinny. Athletic, measuring 5’7″ and weighing in at roughly 125. I started lifting weights at 15 years old, and at some point went from 135 lb to an unhealthy 112, then evening out at 125 lbs. I am happy to say, that at 4 months post-partum, I am weighing 122 lbs. I feel sexy, but not satisfied. I am grateful to have almost no stretchmarks on my stomach, but I definitely have flab in places that I do not ever remember having flab. I was not one of those lucky women who could put on their pre-pregnancy jeans right after giving birth. I went into labor at 181 lbs and left the hospital somewhere between 160-165 lbs after giving birth to a healthy 7lb 15oz baby boy. If I could give any pregnant woman (or new mom) advice on how to get back into shape it would be this:

1) Get a jogging stroller. This thing SAVED MY LIFE. My boyfriend and I work out a system on the weekends where he watches the baby while I sleep an extra 2 hours, and then when I wake up, I take the baby for a jog so that my boyfriend can have some quiet time.

2) Get a girdle. This is going to sound crazy, but I started wearing a girdle 1 week post-partum because my belly was really saggy. It actually hurt to sleep on my side because it felt like my skin was really heavy. I endorse the “Slimming Waist Cincher Shaper” by Leonisa. At first it was really tight and uncomfortable, but in a matter of days I could put it on without sucking my belly in. I was so happy with my results with the size medium that I went on to purchase a size small.

3) Breastfeed. Being a teen mom, I *almost* gave up breastfeeding due to the excruciating pain. But I found it WAY too hard to clean bottles and mix formula in the middle of the night. In my opinion, I lost a lot of weight by breastfeeding not because it burns calories (that’s just a plus), but because I was more conscious about what I ate knowing that my son was getting a taste of it.

4) Try to walk ASAP. I started walking half a mile to school 4 days after giving birth. This really helped me get some fresh air and not be cooped up with the baby. I would not reccomend “excercising”, though. I waited 6 weeks before attempting to go jogging (and I had to stop after about one block).

5) Lift heavy weights. When you get the “okay” from your doctor, I highly recommend getting into a weight-lifting routine. Weight lifting is really what helps me maintain muscle while boosting my metabolism. Muscle burns more calories than fat, so if you do a muscle-building workout, you will burn more calories in your regular day-to-day activities. Also, weight lifting, will NOT make you bulky. Too many women think muscle=manly body and this is simply not true!

6) Buy inspiration clothes. Before my baby was born I bought a few dresses that were my pre-pregnancy size. This really helped me look forward to wearing these clothes and set goals for losing my baby weight. Also, after having my baby, I refused to let myself purchase clothing that would fit before I got down to my pre-pregnancy weight. Since I had hardly any cute outfits to match my cute baby, I did not “get comfortable”, I guess you could say.

I have attached a few pictures, hope you enjoy!
First three: 4 months post partum. A bikini photo pre-pregnancy at 117 lbs. My handsome guy at 4.5 months.

Saggy skin, stretch marks, and a baby boy! (Ashley E)

Bonnie (SOAM) Before Pregnancy, Belly, Cesarean, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Submissions, Teen Mom 2 Comments

(age) 19 years old
(# of pregnancies & births) 2 pregancies and 1 birth
(post-partum) 5 Weeks

I am 5 foot 2 inches tall. Before pregnancy I weighed 114 pounds. I gained 37 pounds, making me 153 pounds by the end of pregnancy. I had a scheduled c-section due to my son being breech. Two weeks PP I lost 20 pounds making me weigh 133 pounds. At four weeks PP I weighed 123 pounds. I haven’t weighed since then because I am weighing myself every two weeks, but my total weight loss is 30 pounds and I have 7 pounds to go before I am back to pre-pregnancy weight. I plan on starting yoga and pilates soon to lose the extra pounds and tighten up a bit. I had a lot of extra skin the first few weeks but I guarantee I’ve lost at least one pant size since my loose skin has slowly started tightening again. Oh! And I can button a couple of pairs of pants now others I have to wear a belly band still but I think that’s helping to flatten my belly!

Underneath My Clothes (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Before Pregnancy, Belly, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Submissions 9 Comments

I was a 5’3″, 115 pound 23 year old with an hourglass figure when I got pregnant with my son. My teeny tiny (22 inches!) waist and flat tummy were my pride. I diligently slathered all kinds of creams all over my belly from the day I got a positive test. I ate a diet high in fruits, vegetables and whole grains. By 37 weeks along, I was starting to think maybe, just maybe I had escaped stretch marks. Ha! They popped up like crazy in the next 4 weeks.

I vaginally gave birth to a 10 pound, 23.5 inch baby boy 6 days after my due date. The weight came off quickly and I wore my pre pregnancy clothes out of the hospital. Everyone told me how great I looked. Well, that’s because they can’t see under my clothes. What they hide causes me untold amounts of distress. The pooch and skin folds, the love handles, the ugly, hideous stretch marks that cover my formerly beautiful mid-section. When I see myself, I can’t help but cry and feel gross.

I feel terrible about myself. I feel sorry for my husband, who only got to have a sexy wife for a few months (ours was a honeymoon baby). He says he still thinks I’m hot and not to worry about it, but I can’t help it. I’m a little bit heartbroken.

I’m 7 months post partum, now. That means only 2 months left until the whole “9 months on, 9 months off” rule has run out. I wish desperately that I could afford a personal trainer, but I can’t. I tried running for a bit and then an old knee injury from dancing reared it’s ugly head and I can’t do that (or much of any exercise) now. I’d like a 2nd child, but I’m terrified of what further damage would be done to my body, as terrible and vain as that sounds.

The first photo is of me right before getting pregnant. The rest are what I look like now, 7 months after having my son.

People say I look great, but underneath my clothes is where the truth lies. The ugly truth.

Coming to terms with the new me! (Krystal)

Bonnie (SOAM) Before Pregnancy, Belly, Breasts, First Pregnancy, Pregnant, Submissions 2 Comments

Tomorrow is the 36th week of my pregnancy. It seems like overnight my body has changed – some changes are beautiful others are a little harder to accept. I’ve waited 29 years to have a baby. In fact, I never thought I would get the chance to be pregnant or carry a baby but somehow, here I am! :) In just four weeks my dreams will come true – I’ll be a mother of a beautiful baby girl – so why do I find myself scrutinizing my body in the mirror looking at every new stretch mark and every pound gained? I tell myself that it is ridiculous that I am so consumed with changes that are NATURAL and part of being a mother. I try to remind myself that the ridiculous image of women portrayed by the media is warped and wrong and that I should be proud of this body that is nourishing and protecting my daughter and giving her life. Still, it’s hard. So, here I am writing this post so that I can force myself to be proud of the New Me. I am no longer the Krystal who never felt her daughter roll around and jump in her belly or whose breasts grew so that she could feed her little girl. I am a mother now and that is something incredibly wonderful and something that I should be proud of. My stretch marks and new body are my proof that I am this new person and I am going to wear them with pride. I’m not going to let the world dictate to me that I should look 18 years old forever. I am going to do this so that I can break the cycle of “achieving perfection” with my own daughter. I’m going to look at these changes every day and remember that I am a very blessed woman who should appreciate that she given an opportunity that some women don’t get to share. I am going to be thankful and most importantly, I am going to be proud!!

***The pictures show my pre-pregnancy body. I was working out a lot to try to get in shape which explains the crazy pose and really low pants! lol Then there is a close-up of the stretch marks on the right/left/ front of my belly and my breasts which have grown almost 3 cup sizes!***

~Age: 29
~Number of pregnancies and births: 1st pregnancy with my daughter Carmen
~The age of your children, or how far postpartum you are: No children until July 16, 2012!

Motherly Beauty (Rachel)

Bonnie (SOAM) Before Pregnancy, Belly, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Pregnant, Second Pregnancy, Submissions 2 Comments

21
1 daughter (18m) and trying for another

I am a 21 year old mother of an 18 month old baby girl. I came upon this site while searching what to expect of your body after having a second child, as my husband and I are trying for our second.

Before becoming pregnant I had what most would call the perfect body. I am 5’8″ weighed 145 lbs…solid muscle. I never knew what love handles were. I could pull anything off. My boobs were amazing. Better than what most women pay to have done. I wore a size 5 and a 34b. Beautiful hourglass shape…I was in love with my body and proud of it as I put a ton of work into it. (picture below)

I continued to wear a size 5 through out my pregnancy. I experienced a ton of sickness. I could not even brush my teeth without vomiting. The smell of food sent me running for the bathroom… My first 3 months I lost 15 pounds. I looked like a stick person… My size 5 jeans were baggy on me… I was miserable…(picture also included) The picture of me with the 12 gauge was at 5 1/2 months, closer to six. Those jeans fit perfectly prior to the pregnancy… I had a small bump barely visible then… I did not start to show until 8 months…its like I woke up one morning and BAM! I routinely used Palmer’s and bio oil through the entire pregnancy but around 8 1/2m I developed them on my sides and one down the middle of my stomach…the same time my belly developed so did my breasts. I went from a 34b to 38D almost overnight, leaving me with horrible stretch marks around the entire perimeter of both of my breasts. I was all baby. After having my daughter who was 7lbs 13oz and 21 1/2 in, my body looked like it did before having her (2hrs later lol) then the water weight and the swelling set in. I wrapped my stomach with a corset type garment for the first 5 months after.. I had the infamous pouch on the front and love handles…which I hate! I have such a long torso that the love handles make me mis-shaped…its like they set in right above my hip bones just on the sides and not all the way around… crazy… Well anyways going from my pre-baby body to this mishapped mess really took its toll on me… I had a hard time adjusting to my curvy body and saggy boobs but my husband has helped me a lot… According to him I made him sick before having the baby because I was too skinny and a woman is supposed to have curves and meat on her bones… I agree with that now… I have come to love who I am. My mother tells me that I finally look like a healthy woman. And I feel that way now… I do still run nightly (2 miles) and toning…abs and push ups to maintain myself. Now that we are trying for our second child I am going to continue running through the pregnancy, as I was afraid that if I did the first time around I might lose the baby. I hope that my stories and picture give you new and expecting mothers hope… I didn’t know of resources like this for my first child.

Black swim suit is 17m after baby
rebel swim suit is 1m after baby
gun pic and red shirt are 5 1/2m prego
scrubs is before baby
black and white is 8 1/2m prego

2 Months PP belly. Hate it, but will learn to love it. (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Before Pregnancy, Belly, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Submissions, Teen Mom 17 Comments

I was 16 when I got pregnant had my sweet little 8 pounds and 7 ounce baby boy after 40 long weeks of pregnancy at age 17! Im 5 foot 7 inches and 147 before i got pregnant at the end of my pregnancy i was a whooping 193!! I now weigh 172. And i know it’s only been two months but it’s hard for me to love my body at such a young age. However I wouldn’t take my son back for anything! I just need a confidence boost that hopefully maybe my belly will look better? My belly button is STILL sticking out…will that go back in? The first two pictures is me in my bikini right before i got pregnant. And the next 3 are 2 months after pregnancy, but the last one is me and my wonderful gift from God!