Submissions

Happy women are willing to show the truth (Britney)

Bonnie (SOAM) 5+ Years Postpartum, Belly, Child Loss, Postpartum, Second Pregnancy, Submissions, Teen Mom 6 Comments

I got pregnant at a young age so already, at 16 besides the fact of being over whelmed about the pregnancy I got stretch marks about a week before I was to turn 9 months. So devastating I though. I was not prepared because I felt as if I’d done everything right, coco butter, lotions, exercise. I am 5’8″ at the time of delivery I weighed 149 pounds ,which is well with in my bmi. Now I am 23 and married and my husband thinks that my stomach is sexy, but that meant nothing until I though I was. And now I can truly say that I do.

Age: I am 23 years old

Number of pregnancies: I have had 2 pregnancies but only 1 birth

Age of child: my son is 6 years old

The aftermath of sexual violence + the beginning of healing (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Breasts, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Pregnant, Sexual Abuse/Violence, Submissions, Update 21 Comments

As a young teen, just as my body – to my great excitement – was starting to change, I was gang raped. The excitement of becoming a woman was taken away from me and the relationship I had with my body turned from love to pure hatred. They say that the body is a temple and my temple had been invaded, scorned, hurt and permanently destroyed. I was never fat, but started perceiving my wide hips and full buttocks as being fat and I developed a serious complex. Not even in front of my husband did I feel comfortable and I was convinced that he secretly thought I was unattractive and even disgusting.

When I got pregnant, I started worrying about my weight gain and how my body would change. What if I couldn’t lose the excess weight after giving birth? What if I got stretch marks? What if my husband would never want to make love to me again? I did like my pregnant belly, though, and was able to see the beauty in it. It was the time after the delivery that I was worried about.

Then I gave birth to my beautiful baby boy. A few days later I stood in the shower and looked at my body in the mirror for the first time. My belly was still round as if I were four months pregnant and my whole body looked full and soft and feminine. “It’s beautiful”, I thought to my surprise. The femininity that I had previously regarded as unattractive and “fat” now looked pretty and inviting. For all these years I had disrespected my body, I had consciously hurt myself in order to punish it for having been raped, for simply having been there, for not having been able to escape. Now I was in awe: it had carried my son for nine months, had put up with the strain of being pregnant, it had miraculously given birth to a perfect baby and was now producing the nourishment to sustain him. But it wasn’t just due to the respect that I made peace with my body. I truly find it beautiful. And I finally love being a woman!

“Anonymous”, 29 years old

Updated here.

14 months pp, still struggling with image, but working to make it better! (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Submissions, Teen Mom 8 Comments

I found out I was pregnant when I was 17. I’d say I was fairly nervous, but also very excited. I’ve had lots of support from family and friends which made my pregnancy almost easy. Other than a few minor things, I can honestly say that I absolutely loved it. I’ve always been self-conscious, but despite the weight gain and the stretch marks, I actually felt really good about myself throughout all 9 months. I’m 5’6, and when I’m at my healthiest/fittest, I weigh around 125 lbs. Before I got pregnant, I gained a bit of weight (thanks, junk food!) but because I had pretty bad morning sickness for the first 5 months, I ended up losing 15 lbs in the first 4 months. I’d say I was fairly small up until the last 2 months when I just exploded! I had a few stretch marks on my sides and my back, but I didn’t get any on my stomach until 2 weeks before my daughter was born. 2 weeks! It was the day after Christmas dinner… I woke up and BAM! they were there. I cried. Oh well.
Vivian was born on January 7, 2009 – her due date. I weighed 190 lbs before she was born. Pretty crazy, huh? I hovered at 160 lbs for about 7 months after she was born, and because I was stupid and thought I could lose the weight without putting much work into it,so I didn’t actually do anything about it until 10 months pp. I was around 145-ish then. I have been going to the gym somewhat regularly since then, although I have recently put it on hiatus while stressing about college and how I’m going to afford it. I am really into the idea of sculpting my body once I get a real chance to do so, so I will probably update with pictures of any kind of progress later.
As for right now… I’m 19, and I weigh around 135 lbs. Not too bad, I guess,but I do realize that my stomach will probably never look the same – you know, with the silvery lines crawling up my belly and sides. And Vivian… well, she is the best little munchkin anybody could ever ask for. She’s one year and two months right now. I love her too much. We’re “homies” as I like to tell people. I go everywhere with her (except work, of course!) and I just love spending time with her. She’s a very happy baby made of smiles, giggles, and pure cuteness.

Here are a few pictures I took today of how I look. I did not look like that a year ago! I was much softer, wider, more out of proportion.You can’t see the stretch marks very well, but trust me, they sure as hell are there! There should be 2 mirror pics, one close of of my stomach, and the last two of the little angel I got out of it!


After 10 Years I’m Still Not Comfortable (Kay)

Bonnie (SOAM) 5+ Years Postpartum, Belly, Breasts, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Submissions 8 Comments

I’m 30 years old and had my son when I was 20. I was tiny before I was pregnant (5’2″ and 105lbs) and my belly was pretty small up until I was 7 months pregnant, then I don’t know what happened…maybe the baby turned? My belly POPPED out and I developed horrible stretch marks on the stomach and breasts. I absolutely hated my body and went to a plastic surgeon to see about getting a tummy tuck and breast lift but both he and my family encouraged me to wait because I was so young and will get marks again if I got pregnant…well, 10 years later and still no husband or baby! I feel like I missed out on my 20’s because I never got to wear a bikini or a cute belly baring top or to pierce my navel. I am glad I found this site though, it’s comforting to find others in similar situations. I only started being more confident the past year or so and actually wore a bikini on vacation in Miami last year. I almost cried whilst running full speed into the water before too many people saw me, but the water felt sooooo good on my skin! I’m trying to be more confident and not so concerned with how I look or what others will think, but it’s still very hard…

I spent the last 10 years hiding from the world, but here we go…this is me under all the clothes. . .

Diastatis Recti (Katie)

Bonnie (SOAM) Before Pregnancy, Belly, Diastasis Recti, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, PUPPP Rash, Submissions 46 Comments

Hi Mums,

I am 30 years old and mother to an 8-month daughter. Her name is Maja.

I used to be a fitness maniac before pregnancy, which you can surely see in my photo ‘before’. I used to be on the skinny side, but during pregnancy I gained 50 lbs and I was huge. People frequently asked me if I was carrying twins. Well, I wasn’t, and my baby wasn’t that big, with just 8 lbs.

Unfortunately, in late pregnancy I developed two miserable conditions, one of them was PUPPP (which made me suicidal) and the other one was diastasis recti. The diastasis recti brought along some stretchmarks around my belly button. These stretchmarks have cured fairly well, now they look like thin white or grayish lines, but when I sit down, my stomach is wrinkled. You can see them in one of the pics.

My belly button is deformed b/c of the diastasis recti. I have recently seen a surgeon and been told that I had a slight hernia and ought to undergo a surgery (a mesh implant). The diastasis recti gives me the funny pot belly which you can see in the pictures. I still look like 5 months pregnant. The trouble is, I will have to wait with the surgery until I’m done with having babies.

And I am still not sure if I want another one… It’s not about the body, I believe exercise can do wonders. What troubles me is PUPPP… Perhaps you have heard of it? Just after I gave birth (10 hours in labor), the itching was so bad that I didn’t even feel any pain. My mother had to move in and look after my baby, because I wasn’t able to sleep, I was restless and a nervous wreck. I even went back to hospital and told them to do ‘something’ or I would kill myself. It usually disappears after labor, mine was only getting worse and worse! I had it for six painful weeks and if it ever comes back… I think I can’t take it any more! Unfortunately I deleted all photos with my PUPPP, b/c looking at them made me itch!

8 months postpartum I lost almost all the extra lbs, with only 5 left. But as you can see, the body is not the same. No time for exercise! I hope this will change over time. And I am still thinking about the DR surgery. It would surely make my pot belly disappear.

I didn’t take any pics of my boobs because they haven’t changed a bit. They were two sizes bigger when I breastfed and now they are back to the original size and shape.

Anyway, Maja is the best thing that’s ever happened in my life!



Update (Iraiosc)

Bonnie (SOAM) Before Pregnancy, Belly, Diastasis Recti, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Pregnant, Submissions, Update 1 Comment

Original entry here.

Hi again, of course i still reading all post of all valiant woman who has new bodies like me. All you made me stronger and leave my depression.
Actually i feel so pretty dressed because i lost more or less all volume. My son will celebrate 1 year the 2nd april!!

Of course i still having umbilical hernia and diastasis… and i don’t know if i want more kids… of course i want… but i’m so so scared that probably i never would repeat… :(
What a bad situation for my husband, my son and me…. but, what would you do? Maybe another pregnancy would break my belly and probably the baby goes out like an alien!! hahahaha :-D
After i decide i will repair the hernia and put the navel at his place. When i will… i show you pics if you want!

Well, i hope you note some difference between fists pics and this, but i still looking bad down my clothes… my navel is so courious and is looking outside…
Kisses to everybody, still strong as you do and take care of yourselves to feel so pretty inside and outside!!

PD1 My son now is walking!!! :DDD bravoooooo!!
PD2 Again…. sorry for my mistakes in english!

Me dressed! I lost all the kilos i’ve gained!! I think now I look so well, don’t?

Do you see the hernia down the navel? and the wrinkles? :O

i know is terrible, but now i feel so better!

me at 38 weeks

and me one month before being pregnant.

Updated here.

Learning to Love My Body Again (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Before Pregnancy, Belly, Birth, Breasts, Postpartum, Pregnant, Second Pregnancy, Submissions 10 Comments

I am 33 years old. I have 2 children, that today are ages 6 and 8 years old. I nursed both of them. Before pregnancy, I was no super model, but was healthy, around 140 lbs, with perky nice little B cups. With my first pregnancy, I gained 50 lbs. I quickly lost all that weight by 7 months post partum. My body looked better than ever. I had nice boobs and curves that I never did before. I don’t remember what my belly looked like, but it couldn’t have been too bad, because I don’t remember it, LOL. Pregnancy and birth taught me to love my body at whatever size and I felt so sexy when I was pregnant with my first and after. With my second, I gained 70 lbs. This pregnancy really took its toll on my body. It took me almost 2 years to regain my pre-pregnancy weight. I was still nursing, so still had boobs and was confident and content with my body again at that point. But then I developed several autoimmune and chronic health problems: Hashimoto’s thyroiditis, fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue, etc etc. I ballooned up to 200 lbs in less than one year’s time! Then I reclaimed my health and slowly worked my way down to 130 lbs, which is where I am today. My body has really gone through so many weight changes now between the pregnancies, nursing and swelling to D+ cups, and the health problems. I am no longer nursing, so my boobs are like flat pancakes today. My stomach is a wrinkly and saggy. I struggled for the longest time to accept this new body as my own. Especially my breasts. I felt a disconnect with them, like they just weren’t a part of me. Some foreign invaders hanging from my body. But I am slowly learning to love my breasts again. Slowly learning to wear the badges of my life’s journey with honor and pride. It is a slow process. Self-love is hard work! Coming across this website has really helped spur that along. Looking at the pics of all these beautiful moms has really inspired me. We are all so beautiful and should be proud of our womanly, motherly, sexy bodies!

First picture: first pregnancy, 6 months post partum
Second picture: nursing my first
Third picture: pregnant with my second child
Fourth picture: just after the birth of my second child
Rest of the pictures: me today at age 33; my kids are 6 and 8 years old

Reached My Goal (Susy)

Bonnie (SOAM) Before Pregnancy, Belly, Child Loss, Piercing, Postpartum, Pregnant, Second Pregnancy, Submissions 12 Comments

I am a 21 yr old mother of an almost 3 month old baby we named William Christian. My husband and I always knew we wanted kids, so 6 months after our wedding we decided to start trying. We got pregnant quickly (3 cycles) and we were both thrilled. Unfortunately, at 5 weeks pregnant, we lost the baby. We were both devastated. After my loss, my cycles became very irregular. I almost completely stopped ovulating. My gyn put me on clomid. By the 5th cycle of it I was losing hope. I was becoming a very bitter person and all but hated every pregnant woman. But God had a plan for us because that cycle was our lucky one! I was scared because I was bleeding just like the first and even cramping, but the little bean held on! The bleeding didn’t stop til I was 8 weeks pregnant. The rest of my pregnancy was smooth sailing and I felt great.
At 39w1d I woke up having strange pains. Little did I know, I was in labour! A mere 3.5 hours later my beautiful boy was born in my kitchen, into my midwives hands and placed on my chest. He was 7lbs 6oz and 20.5 inches long. My homebirth was an empowering and beautiful experience that I will never forget.
Before I got pregnant I was in great shape. Working out every day and taking in very few calories. (Perhaps, too few?). I had gained 37 lbs with my pregnancy, eating whatever I
wanted. I only lost 8 lbs wit the birth, and another 8 in the few days following. After that it stopped dead. The remaining 21 lbs were up to me! Through breastfeeding, healthy eating, and slowly resuming my workout, I lost those pounds by 2.5 months PP. I’m currently 5’9 and 134.5 lbs.
My body isn’t quite what it used to be. I have some scarring where my belly ring used to be. My boobs are covered in stretch marks, but I thankfully didn’t get any on my belly.
I’m happy with my body. It’s ability to grow this child inside me, and somehow become half decent looking again.

Here are pictures of me:
2 of prepregnancy
18 weeks pregnant
35 weeks pregnant
39 weeks pregnant
1 day Postpartum
and 2.5months Postpartum



More Changes (Sarah)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Belly, Breast or Body Art, Breastfeeding, Child Loss, Four or More Pregnancies, Hyperemesis Gravidarum, Pregnant, Submissions, Update 7 Comments

Since I submitted my story and pictures all that time ago I have been pregnant another two times. The first of those was stillborn in the middle trimester and recovering some sense of my body not being broken is very hard! I’m now pregnant again (my 6th pregnancy) and not far off due.

So much has changed, and changes day to day, it’s hard to know where to begin. But right now, I’m so grateful for all of the good – even though I still have hyperemesis through my pregnancies, even after losing three children, after *everything*. My two girls are amazing (they are four and two years old respectively). I’m looking forward to tandem nursing. And I love this bump, stretch marks and all. :)