Belly

Proud Momma (Van)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Breasts, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Pregnant, Submissions 7 Comments

When I got pregnant at 19 I was 140lbs and happy with how I looked for the most part (who doesn’t have little qualms about how they look.?) Now at 2 years post partum I am 195lbs, which is more than I was fully pregnant with my little girl. I feel mixed emotions about my body, I fee disgusting and sad, and ashamed that I let myself get this way. But I am trying to not complain about my body in front of my daughter. I want her to see that women are beautiful! and so as a *friend* of mine said “I will walk the walk”. What better way then to celebrate the shape of a mother with images! I have stretch marks on my hips, but they are my badge of honour for the accomplishment that is my daughter. My Breasts are not perky but they nourished her. I cant wait to do it again, regardless of what it does to my body! I am a Mother!

~Age: 22
~Number of pregnancies and births: 1
~The age of your children, or how far postpartum you are: 2 years postpartum

first 3 pics are me 2 years post partum , the last is me at 27 weeks.

New Mummy, New body to accept (Kelly)

Bonnie (SOAM) Before Pregnancy, Belly, Breasts, Cesarean, Cesarean Scar and/or Incision, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Pregnant, Submissions 18 Comments

~Age: 22
~Number of pregnancies and births: 1 pregnancy, 1 birth
~The age of your children, or how far postpartum you are: Kara is 4 weeks old

My partner Matt and I are both young, I’m 22, he is 20. We had Kara 4 weeks ago, I had to have an emergency c-section as I was induced at 9 days overdue and after 12 hours of hard labour I hadn’t dilated at all.

I was happy with the c-section, although it took me about a week to walk unsupported I am happy with how everything went.
I have never been a totally stick skinny person, I’ve always been curvy and I’ve always had big boobs. Now they are just massive haha (and my breastfeeding nipples are so huge!!!).

I’m lucky to have an amazingly supportive partner who tells me every day that I’m still attractive and that he loves my tummy (pouch and all). I got more stretchmarks than I was expecting but I will grow to accept them.

I can’t help but feel down when I see other girls my age in bikinis and such but I have decided that once summer comes round again (December here in Australia) I’ll bear a bikini no matter how floppy I still am because it’ll feel empowering to show of those marks that I like to think of as “Mummy badges”.

I’ve lost so 8 kilos so far, 5 from the birth and 3 kilos since. I aim to get down to 60kgs which is 22 kilos away!!! I’m using Wii Fit for light exercise… I can’t wait til it stops telling me I’m obese!!!

I’ll include a small bunch of pics to show off all my changes

1st pic: pre pregnancy body (actually the night Matt and I found out we were expecting!)
2nd pic: 40 weeks pregnant
3rd pic: 2 hours post c-section
4th pic: 1 week post c-section
5th pic: 4 weeks post c-section, stretchmarks on butt, hip, thigh and stomach
6th pic: 4 weeks post c-section, stretchmarks on stomach and c-section scar
7th pic: 4 weeks post c-section, post partum body
8th pic: Kara Lee Eleanor – 4 weeks old

Twins and a Toddler…not sure who “I am” anymore (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Cesarean, Cesarean Scar and/or Incision, Child Loss, Postpartum, Pregnant, Submissions, Third Pregnancy, Twins 34 Comments

Who am I? I’m a…Mom….who is unsatisfied. Grateful in a lot of respects, but one who feels guilty I’m so unhappy. I can’t believe I’m writing this. Maybe I’ll get some peace with after doing so…doubtful. I must have taken a half dozen pictures of my belly and kept deleting them saying…”nah, it’s not that bad…must be angle.” But, alas, pictures don’t lie so I here I am…humbled….sad…disgusted.

I’m 39 years old with a 4 year old and boy/girl twins who are almost 9 months old. I had an easy pregnancy with my first and difficult time with the twins for obvious reasons. I was on bed rest at 25 weeks and carried them to 38.5 weeks. My son was born 7 lbs. 6 oz. and my daughter was 6 lbs. 1 oz. Everyone is healthy and for that I’m grateful.

But I hate what it’s done to my self esteem. It’s not just my weight really either.

I’ve never been what you’d consider thin. I was always a pear shape with bigger butt and thighs. My only saving grace was my thin waist and belly…now that’s gone. I’m 5’1” and currently weigh about 185 lbs and wearing size 16 pants. With the twins, I got up to like 220. At my happiest, I weighed about 135ish…around my wedding in 2002. Good times!

I’ve tried buying control garments to push in and smooth out the rolls, but it makes me feel like a sausage so I only wear it when I want to look really good…well, as good as I can. I really don’t get out much…thankfully.

Because of our financial situation and with the unexpected twins, I had to quit work and stay home with the twins (my 4 year old goes to pre-school). I hunger for anytime intellectual stimulation and adult interaction. I often think I might be a better Mommy if I wasn’t around them all day, but that is not in the cards right now so I have to make the best out of this. I miss work, but there is no way I could every go back, not even part time, and afford day care for 2 and pre-school for 1. I’m grateful my husband has a good job and we live modestly so we are ok. I do hate having to ask him for money so I can buy socks or underware. It’s kinda humiliating to have to ask for money, but that is my reality now.

One of the hardest things for me is that me and my husband haven’t had sex in almost 2 years (since we conceived the twins). We didn’t at all when I was pregnant…was never really into that for some reason and after the twins, forget it–no energy or time. We are wiped out by 8:30pm and he wakes for work at 5am so he’s tired and I’m tired too. I have a wonderful husband, he’s a great father, great provider…but I feel we have grown distant in a lot of ways. Most of which are related to the chaos of raising a family and not having a lot of “us” time. We were never really ‘nympho’s”…at our best, we had sex 2 to 3 times a month…but it’s starting to bother me. He doesn’t ever complain about it nor does he ever complain about my body…but he never really gives me some positive hope either by saying “oh, honey, you look fine to me.” I’m sure he’s biting his lips out of kindness. I hate my body and don’t feel attractive at all.

The scar doesn’t really bother me, but the “twin skin” does. When I’m laying down, it’s all loose and wrinkled. When I stand, it sags. I don’t even think the gym would help with the extra skin…but it would help if I’d go more. I don’t really mind the gym…getting there is half the battle. The hardest part is managing the twins and a toddler and the gym. Between naps and feeding, I have 45 minutes to get there, drop the off in the child care center on site, work out and get them home for their next nap. I’ve tried working out at home, but I can’t stay focused…I keep thinking about all the housework to do and the million other things I could be doing.

Eating healthy is sooooo much hard work and expensive. Healthy stuff is so expensive and we are living paycheck to paycheck and there is not much left over. And, who has time to cut all that stuff up and prepare…people say the night before….well, I’m beat and exhausted by 9pm. I’m so crazed during the day, that I’m lucky if I can make a PB&J or something quick…surely and conveniently unhealthy. There are times I’m so stressed out that I eat just because it makes me feel better. Like a drug. There are times, I just want to throw up for a week or two to see some results and maybe get motivated. I’m thinking maybe I’ll try Alli too…soiling my pants might be enough motivation to eat well. I don’t know.

It’s not really the weight per se, it’s the displacement of “stuff.” My belly from the side view looks like a “B” and it’s so…weird. I guess that is the twin skin pouch I was warned about. I guess the only lucky part is that I didn’t get any stretch marks which is amazing considering how large I got (picture below is of me at 37 weeks).

I long to be a healthy weight and happy with my body…it doesn’t have to be perfect, but not like it is now which is terrible period. There is not way of sugar coating it for me. I don’t want to be the ‘fat mom’ who can’t run after and keep up with her children. I want my husband to “want me”. I have to find the gumption to do something about this!

Thanks for reading. I hope I can find some peace someday. Maybe after the kids are in school and I go back to work and start saving for a tummy tuck. But for now, I know who I am a frumpy Mom…with no career…no sex life…living in empire waste clothing to hide my belly…with healthy and happy kids, a good husband, and for that I should find comfort…but I really don’t–but will keep trying.

– Age: 39
– Number of pregnancies and births: 3 pregnancies, 2 births—1 via c-section, 1 set of twins via c-section, 1 miscarriage at 9 weeks.
– The age of your children, or how far postpartum you are: 4 yr old and 8 month old twins (8 months postpartum)

Accepting my NEW “mother” body (Lizz)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Cesarean, Cesarean Scar and/or Incision, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Pregnant, Submissions, Teen Mom 10 Comments

This is my Labor Story and I would like to share it.
My EDD was Nov. 23rd, 2009

Nov 24th, 2009 I went in at 8AM for a regular check up.
Dr. Wong stripped my membranes and 5 minutes later I started cramping.
I told her about how I have been itchy for a few weeks, and she seemed concerned and told me to go head to L&D for an Induction.

I went home took a shower and grabbed my bags and headed to L&D. They gave me a room, and hooked me up. We found out I was already having contractions 3-5 minutes apart. They kept asking me if I wanted the epidural, and I told them NO, I dont need it. I was there all day.

Around 7PM I was dilated at around 4cm. So the doctor gave me the epidural so I can rest at night, and he also broke my water after. All night I was up, I was so excited to meet Sofia. But During the night I started getting a fever and shaking. I had caught an infection, due to breaking my water early and not progressing fast enough.

Around 3AM I was at 7cm. Around 5AM I was at around 9cm. And then again at 7AM, still at 9cm.
And thats when the doctor said if we dont go anywhere within the next hour or so, we might have to do an emergency c-section. 8 AM still at 9cm. Doctor called for an emergency c-section due to the infection that can get to Sofia.

They got everything ready, numb my body….and made me take a shot of some weird nasty stuff =(.
I’m in the O.R shaking still, feeling cold.

My husband got to come in the room and so they began. While working with my body, I started feeling sick and puked =(. Moments later Doctors told hubby to get ready and meet little Miss Sofia Roxanne.

And his eyes watered, thats when I knew how much he loves us both.
Welcome Miss Sofia Roxanne On November 25th,2009 at 0908AM, 7lbs 4oz and 19.5 inches.

~Your Age: 19
~Number of pregnancies and births: 1
~The age of your children, or how far postpartum you are: 5 months old

A letter to my body 1 yr PP (Emily)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Breasts, Cesarean, First Pregnancy, Positive Body Image/Words of Enouragement, Postpartum, Pregnant, Reader's Favorite, Second Pregnancy, Submissions, Uncategorized, Update 18 Comments

Age: 23
1 pregnancy, son is 12 months old, 1 yr PP

Dear body,
Thank you for all that you have given me and others. I am sorry for what I used to think of you, I was wrong you are beautiful. I promise to never be ashamed of my body anymore. I promise to love this body and treat it with respect for the rest of my life. I promise to be PROUD of my belly, my breasts, my scars. I created and brought a life into this world and so far have nourished that life with only my body. I am too insignificant to realize the gift god gave me by making me a woman. I am a creator of life and beauty, I do not have to look like a bikini model to be happy. I am a mother, like the earth with hills and valleys. I love you body!!!!

This one’s for my daughters! (Sarah)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Breasts, Cesarean, Child Loss, Four or More Pregnancies, Mom over 30, Postpartum, Submissions, VBAC 22 Comments

After years of believing that my belly had to be flat and washboard perfect, I finally came to terms with the fact that washboard isn’t normal. It’s not normal for women to look like that, especially after they’ve had children.

Bodies during and after pregnancy are beautiful! Embracing the Goddess Within has been a long time coming with me, but…I’m ready. I’ve always been so nervous about anyone seeing my belly, but…this one’s for my daughters, so…here goes.

I’m 39 years old. I’ve had 4 children. My first daughter was 18 years ago, via c-section. My next daughter was 15 years ago, and a VBAC. My son is 3 1/2, a VBAC, and my daughter just turned two years old (VBAC as well).

I am a breastfeeding mother, and have been nursing now for 3 1/2 years, tandemed for 10 months. I don’t think my boobs have gotten saggy at all. They’re a bit smaller than they were in my 20’s, but with breastfeeding, I finally have those sticky out nipples that I always wanted! No more flat ones for me. Bonus! :)

Age: 39
Years postpartum: 2
Ages of Children: 18, 15, 3, 2
Number of Pregnancies: 11 (7 miscarriages) Number of Births:4

Mommy Boobs (Amy)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Mom over 30, Postpartum, Submissions, Third Pregnancy 10 Comments

Age: 36
Number of pregnancies and birth: 3/2
Age of children and how far postpartum: 6 years and 9 weeks

I love this site. I have two children, one six years old and one 9 weeks old. I am one of those ladies that gets my stomach back quickly but my babies have done a number on my boobs and rear end. How low can they go? That is the question I want answered. I officially have mommy boobs. Despite the need for a four hook, underwire, padded strap bra, I wouldn’t trade my mommy status for a perfect pair. Bless all the Moms, we are beautiful

Love Yourself Mama, Then Love Everything Else (Bryana)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Positive Body Image/Words of Enouragement, Postpartum, Second Pregnancy, Submissions 23 Comments

Why is it, that as women, when we are at our best, we look into ourselves and label it the “worst”?
We never seem to realize how great we are until we fall below that bar that we have set so ridiculously high for ourselves!
It is sad to see, hear, and live. And all it seems to do is cause shame and the sense of unworthiness.
And why?
Because we are not a size 0? Because we have stretch marks here, there, and every where? Because we have that last inch or more of skin that has decided it has lost all elasticity and would rather droop down then suck back up and give us a smooth, T.V. worthy tummy? Because our once perky, teenage breasts now have that motherly sag?
Because we lose our cool and yell? Because once in a while we spend an extra 5 minutes in the shower just to avoid the inevitable screaming, crying, and fighting children? Because sometimes we skip on sweeping the floors because 4 times a day just seems like enough some days? Because after making breakfast, changing diapers, doing 6 loads of laundry, plugging your ears during screaming fits, not to mention trying to make something worthy of eating for dinner, we would rather just sit on the couch for a solid 5 minutes of silence? Because, yes, we do break down and instead of stopping the children from crying, we just join them?
And because we do all these things, and have the “imperfect” yet, perfectly beautiful bodies, we feel shame and unworthiness? When did the image of a mother’s body, no matter the age, go from a natural woman, stretch marked and sagged, to an air brushed, breast implanted, and stretch mark free woman?
I want to know, because the exact millisecond this took place, women lost their pride and self esteem, and all I want is for all the women and mommies out there, to have that back.
It saddens me to read of women that are ashamed and misplaced mentally, to read stories of women that are mentally, emotionally, and physically abused by husbands, family, and friends, because they are no longer beautiful, because their bodies have become “tainted” all because we have brought beautiful gifts from God into this world.
What is our world coming to?
Why are women only perfect in magazines, and then expected to portray that on a day to day basis, and if that is not possible, then we might as well cover head to toe so no one witnesses the damaged bodies?
I love myself, 20 lbs heavier, 10 lbs lighter, skin a little looser, skin a little darker, a few less stretch marks ago… this is who I am. And I hope you can love yourself too, because that is what we are meant to do: Love ourselves. If we can do that, than we can do anything.

060210-bryana-1

Updated here.

Skinny, But Strong… My Way (Skye)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Submissions, Update 17 Comments

So, here I am again, this is my second post, my first is here.

Now that I’m 13 months post partum I feel the need to share with you all something that has been amazing for my body…
I didn’t say too much about my body in my first most so I will give you a bit of an overview now.
I grew up very very skinny till I hit 16, things suddenly popped out!! you know how that goes I’m sure:) and being the shy, self conscious girl that I was I fell into a downward spiral of bulimia/anorexia for the next 7 years, either starving for months on crazy diets or bingeing and purging all day long.

When I met my now husband (he was hitching a ride!!) I had finally come to a healthy happy balance and was basically a veggie loving mungbean worshipper!!
3 months later I was wondering why my boobs were getting bigger… haha! we were surprised and happy though, it was all happening so fast, we were living together out in the rainforest and about a month earlier I had asked him to marry me! some things are just meant to be.

I was constantly nauseous and tired for the first 3 months, a never ending hangover. I went from health nut to having ice-cream for breakfast. My weight started at about 52kg/114 lbs, I’m 5’5 tall, and I went up to 58kg/128 lbs in the first 3 months.. I was very curvy:)

We married when I was 12 weeks along and about a 2 week later we moved across the country to be with my family for support.
Slowly my appetite disappeared as my last few months of pregnancy were in the height of summer, I weighed 63 kg/139 lbs at 41 weeks.

So, as I wrote in my first post, I had a magnificent home water birth, completely drug free despite excruciating back labour due to having a sway back.. I still feel so proud that I birthed my baby myself, I took him from the water and absorbed every last drop of beauty in that experience.

In the last few months of pregnancy I did a lot of research on natural birth etc and happened to stumble across a whole new view of parenting, part of which is wearing your baby… so, I bought a ring sling and a stretchy hemp wrap and oh how I love them! I have never used a pram, I don’t use playpens or things that hold, swing or bounce… instead I carry my baby boy where ever we go, shopping, bush walking,hanging washing, dancing, vacuuming, doing dishes, cooking, in the shower etc etc… he is always with me viewing the world from my perspective, he is involved in my interactions, learning language, gesture and movement and I have the pleasure of observing him grow..
Not only is it wonderful for him but the changes I have seen in my body are amazing!! I have never been so strong before, as my son grew so did my strength, I am now 46kg/101 lbs and my son is 12kg/26.5 lbs, so you can imagine what kind of a workout I get when I go for a 4km walk:)
The idea that you need to leave your precious one in the care of someone else or at child care so you can trudge of the the gym is, in my view, ridiculous! Seriously, put your bub in a sling, wrap, mei tai, whatever and go for a walk, better yet, dance around the house! you will feel it, trust me and your little one will LOVE it!

I’m not saying this will change stretch marks or bounce our boobs back to their former position, what I am saying is keep your baby where they belong, in your arms, and create a strong body while doing it.. think about it, how could it not have a positive impact on your body?
I honestly believe this is how nature intended it to be, just like breast feeding contracts your uterus, it just makes sense, don’t you think?

Now, I know there are going to be those who are defensive about what I have written here, just as many were about a previous post about flat bellied mums, I have posted this only to give a new perspective as I haven’t read any other posts about the positive effects of wearing your baby and well, I feel so strongly about it that I just had to share…

The proof is in the pudding, so to speak… so here are some pic’s of me.

12 months pp swimming with my son
13 months pp sitting under a tree
13 months pp strong arms

I Absolutely Loathe My Stomach (Toby)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Postpartum, Second Pregnancy, Submissions 14 Comments

I have been trying to come to terms with my pp tummy for 5 years. I am only 24 but I feel like I am trapped in the body of an 80 year old woman. I am 5’7 and 150 lbs. I have two beautiful children ages 5 and 1. I work out at the gym regularly with only success of losing fat, I am still left with extra skin no matter what I do. It seems the more fat I lose, the more saggy I get. I guess this is just especially touchy for me because I work at a gym, and I have always been athletic but my goals are so unattainable right now. It is hard to see my friends (whom are also mothers) walk out of child birth unharmed, we work out together and while they have beautiful abs I have a layer of saggy squish hanging out on top of mine. I have stretch marks all over my love handles, inner thighs, and stomach. They are mostly where I have extra skin, and I would mind having those chopped off along with my extra skin. My love handles have grown tremendously throughout my pregnancies and it seems as if the squish is there to stay too. I won’t even get to my breasts, but they are just as bad as my stomach…described as..empty bags of sand I suppose. Some days I feel better about my body than others but there are days of all time lows as well. Seeing all of the other women on here does make me feel better about my situation, but only until I look in the mirror again. (And ohhh how those gym mirrors can be decieving!) Is it wrong to just want to go to a surgeon and get everything repaired to the way it was before? I hate my body :-( My children are my world, I would never take them back. I just wish I could fix myself! My husband is extremely supportive and says I am beautiful no matter what, my body has damaged my mind so much that I don’t take anything he says to heart, I just reply with a monotone “thanks, babe.” I plan on getting a tummy tuck and breast lift when I reach my goal weight (130) and when I hit the lottery. lol. Okay, thank goodness for financing… I try so hard to look past the vanity of it all and appreciate and embrace my body the way a mother should, but for me the reality is that I will not be completely healed inside and out until I am happy with my body. I’m sorry if I sounded like I’m throwing a big pity party, it’s just one of those days. Reading all of your stories has made me feel more thankful than I have been lately. Thank you all.