Belly

36 and Concerned (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Breasts, First Pregnancy, Mom over 30, Postpartum, Submissions 4 Comments

I came to this site for two reasons. One is to offer hope. I had my first child at 27 and bounced back well. I lead an unusually active lifestyle at my most sedentary because I have horses, goats, and a bunch of dogs and other animals. I can’t keep still for very long. As a result, I achieved a look I can be proud of about two years after my first child. The photo is me about four years after my first child. This link goes to a photo taken about two years ago.

I hope it offers hope to a few and a reality check for those who need that. I never became Twiggy thin, but the larger breasts and hips became assets because I thought of them that way. To some, this is a picture of a woman who is much too thin. For others, it may be a ray of hope. Either way, it shows that the postpartum body need not be something to feel ashamed of. I’m quite sure this photographer realized I’d given birth and still he felt the picture (NOT airbrushed) was beautiful enough to appear on his web site.

That said, I know genetics played a role and that being older will make it that much harder to achieve the same results, if they can be achieved at all. That brings me to my second reason for being here. I have remarried since that picture, and am a couple of years older. I don’t look appreciably different, perhaps a few pounds heavier. My new husband loves my body and is, in fact, proud to show me off. I want to keep him happy with my body as long as I am able. I also want to offer him another child. He loves me and all three of our collective brood and has a great deal to offer a new baby. I am struggling with these seemingly incompatible desires. I kick myself for being so vain, especially in light of issues like stepsisters, a stepfather, sibling rivalry, education, finances, etc, but I am no more than human.

Most of the women here seem so young to me, and it makes me think “But they are not like me,” even though I know that isn’t necessarily so. That human thing again, trying to make my situation different. I keep wondering if being fully physically adult before having my first made any difference. I look for the older woman who is proud of her postpartum body so I can feel some slight hope, even knowing that I will not be quite the same after another child.

In any case, I will likely continue to do what we as humans love to do-find excuses to do just as we please. I know I will get over changing my body’s shape if I really want that baby. I also know that, whatever the outcome, it will be worth it and my husband will love me regardless.



The REAL Beauty (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Breasts, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Submissions 12 Comments

This is my body 11 weeks after the birth of my beautiful baby girl. She saved my life and lifted my soul out of the darkness. I have never seen anything more beautiful than my daughter and every time her tiny hand grasps mine, I see the reason why I am alive. There is no greater gift and love is not enough for how I feel for her. She is everything worth living for and all that is wonderful in this world. A baby is truly a miracle no one can describe. My body cradled her inside of me and now I cradle her in my arms. I will never look the way I did before. My body gave up parts of itself to create this beautiful being. I cry about the fact that I cant wear my old jeans….I feel unattractive and fat every day…..But I realize that these changes gave me HER. So I pick myself up and I put on my jogging pants and keep going. I would give my life for her so what’s a few extra pounds and sagging breasts? Women, you are ALL beautiful. No one is immune to pregnancy changes. Accept that a human body is not meant to be perfect. It is meant to be loved. And our children will love us no matter what we look like. That is the beauty of motherhood and the real beauty of being a woman.






Will I ever be confidant again?? (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Before Pregnancy, Belly, First Pregnancy, Pregnant, Submissions 3 Comments

Hi im 21yrs old. well let me tell you a little bit about my story, me and my husband got married 3yrs ago i was studying and he was working as a truck driver after 2yrs on the pill we decide that we wanted to have a baby i was about to graduate so i stop the pill on 5/2007 and where trying with no luck i got so depress that i drop off from school, i after 7months finally decide to go to a gynecologist, she gave me a calendar and told me to follow my ovulation dates and gave me 3 months to try that. It worked i got pregnant the month after we were so exited. My pregnancy was great i didn’t gain any weight and my baby girl was in perfect condition then the eight month came along i started having more appetite gaining 2 to 3 pounds a week it was horrible my body started stretching everywhere. At 37 I start to have hight blood pressure and i was going to the hospital everyday my due date was November 27 but i wanted to have her the 11th on my bday but the 16th came along i started having contractions at 1am i was 38 weeks, my water brake at 9am i was dropping so slowly that i spend the hole day with contractions i didn’t wanted to have an epidural so i felt everything i got the 9cm at 5:15pm and thats when i started pushing FINALLY!!! while i was pushing i felt my skin stretching and burning my baby girl was born at 5:53pm so i had her pretty fast. She tear me and i got 5 stitches but i was all better in 4 days. Now my daughter is a month and i LOVE her so much shes my life, but i see my body and i feel horrible i cry everyday when i see my self in the mirror even my face is fat, and its not only the skin or the stretch marks its the back damage that i got from my breast and belly. will my body get better or will it stay like this. I’m waiting on my gynecologist to give me the permission to exercise. I’m happy to see that im not alone in this. my husband says that he doesn’t care but i think that if let myself be like this and i don’t do anything he will find someone that looks better but i mainly do it for me i want to feel happy with my body like i used to. I’m attaching a picture of how i used to be,my 7 months, 38 weeks and one month pp.





Two-Time Gestational Surrogate and Mother of Two (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Four or More Pregnancies, Postpartum, Pregnant, Submissions, Surrogacy 4 Comments

Hi I am a 2x Gestational Surrogate. I also have 2 kids of my own Baylee 11 and Tyler 5. I am a proud surrogate of 2 baby girls. One born 2/27/07, and another born 8/25/08. I am proud of all 4 babies I have given birth to. However my first child was the pregnancy to give me my lovely stretch marks and chubb. All 3 other pregnancies gave me no additional stretch marks. My weight has been up and down over the years. I am actually at my lowest now 140lbs. I am proud of this as this is after 4 pregnancies. I would not change a thing, but do admitt I wish I did not have the stretch marks and chubb around the belly. My 2 kids were vaginal births in 1997, and one in 2003. My first surrogate baby was an emergrncy c-section, and my second surrogate baby was a repeat c-section. I am proud of them all. And have grown to accept my body as it is.


Here I am 38 weeks along with my 4th pregnancy. This pregnancy was my second surrogate baby
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This is me after my 3rd pregnancy and first surrogate baby. See how heavy I still was. Im the lady on the right.
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Here I am at 26 weeks along with my 4th surrogate baby. This is my son Tyler 5yrs old.
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This is me Christmas 2008 with Tyler again. After 4 pregnancies. I lost 42 lbs since delivering my last baby and that is 15 less than before I was pregnant. I am very proud of myself as I have always been over weight.
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I Earned My Stripes (Mama D)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, First Pregnancy, Pregnant, Submissions 4 Comments

For me, December 5th will mark a whole year from conception. As you all know, it’s been an intense year, and one that has fundamentally changed me, mind, body and spirit.

Today I was enjoying my son, and thinking about how much he’s already learned in such a short time. The changes are so rapid, and so monumental. He’s grabbing things now. He’s moving things. He’s starting to make splashes with his legs in the tub. He’s learning that he can actually manipulate his surroundings – interact with the world, touch it, move it – not limited to placidly watching it anymore.

I’ve been thinking about change, and how life, from birth to death is change. The idea that there is or should be some sort of “growth plateau” around our 20’s or 30’s is an illusion. Change is perpetual, and it leads to transformation. And life changes are not constant or gradual, they come in fits and spurts. Growth spurts.

So, I’m watching my son, and I’m marveling at his benchmarks and growth spurts and chubby cheeks and laughter and at some point, I ask myself, “If you are so happy for this rapid change, growth and transformation in your son, then why aren’t you celebrating your own as well?” Deep. I mean, here we are, new mothers holding babies on our hips that grew inside us feeling bad about stretchmarks and cellulite. Stupid, isn’t it?

But shoot, we don’t know any better. We get tricked into believing that having a baby is a thing you “bounce back” from. We don’t understand it as a fundamental transformation, but rather as some sort of “situation” that we will return to “normal” after.

I mean, men probably have a better understanding of what women’s post-pregnancy bodies look like than we do! Unreal. I’ll admit that at 33 years old, I’d only seen one belly with stretchmarks before I got my own. I remember feeling so bad for her. God…

When I got mine in the 8th month, I couldn’t believe it. I would just stare and stare at them in the mirror. I got more and more in that last month and they swirled up around my belly button like a galaxy. A few days after I had my boy, I finally looked at them again in the mirror. I didn’t hate them. I kinda liked them. I mean, isn’t it like a souvenir of pregnancy? You go to Florida and get a mug or a t-shirt, why shouldn’t you have a souvenir of pregnancy? I say stretchmarks are the new tattoos!

Change is still happening, and they’ll probably fade over time and the pooch will go down, but I’m not going to feel bad about them. Those marks symbolize a whole transformation in me. Those stripes taught me how to love again. Those stripes gave me hope again.

So ladies, I earned my stripes, and I’m proud of them! I say you should be too! :)

Mama D



Getting Used to the New Me (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Breasts, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Submissions, Tattoo 11 Comments

Before I got pregnant, I had a pretty decent body — not great, just average. Since giving birth to my son 6 weeks ago, I am struggling to adjust to my new, “mom’s” body. I guess I got away luckier than some — while I have tons and tons of stretchmarks on my chest, some on hips and inner thighs, I only got one on my stomach in the entire pregnancy. I gained 21 lb during my pregnancy and have already lost the weight, and then some. I don’t really have any problem with my tummy, even though it’s still softer than it was before… I know that will change with time. I am, however, having a hard time dealing with my breasts. I’m only 23 years old, and before having my son, my breasts were a large B/small C, and very perky. Now they’ve gone up to a D, and in my worst moments, I can’t help but feel like they are ugly, pendulous udders sitting on my chest. It doesn’t help that they’ve got a stretch mark ‘bra’, or that they are covered with very visible blue veins (I am very pale, and breastfeeding constantly) all over. I hate getting sweaty under my breasts; that never happened before! In my best moments, I feel so proud that I am able to nourish my beautiful son with my own body, and that he has already gone up to over 11 lb in just 6 weeks (he was born at 8 lb 6 oz) on my breastmilk, alone. I guess when it gets down to it, I will learn to cope with my body. It will always be different, and thankfully, my husband says he finds me even sexier than before I got pregnant. My struggle now is to find myself as sexy in a new role — not just as a young woman, but as a mother.





7 months pp. A crazy new life. (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, First Pregnancy, Piercing, Postpartum, Submissions, Teen Mom, Update 10 Comments

I was surprised to find that my story was a lot more common than I thought. I first found out I was pregnant as a senior in high school. My boyfriend (who is now my husband) reacted differently than most young men would have in his situation. He told me that whatever I chose to do, he would support. The though of abortion crossed my mind for a brief moment but I knew that I was in love with the baby that was already growing in me. As the months went by I got bigger and bigger. No thanks to my steady diet of anything greasy. =)I saw the pregancy as the only time in my life when i could indulge. Because I never did before. Pre pregnancy i weighed 125 pounds 5’7″. I fit nicely into a size two and would freak out if my weight approached the dreaded 130. At the end of my pregnancy i weighed 175 pounds. I used coco butter religiously but I still got stretch marks all over my sides, underneath the belly button, and thighs. Following the birth of my son I fell into post partum depression. At the time I did not know that I was actually depressed. I felt guilty for my thoughts and actions and the only person who experienced my bad attitude was my husband. I would snap on him because I was so unhappy with the way I looked. It was hard to accept that my body was “ruined” ( or so I thought). I would blame him for getting me pregnant and blame him for the way I looked. I found this website browsing the web one night depressed and feeling hopeless about the state of my body. I couldnt believe that the stretchmarks that I got would stay on me forever, in fact I refused to believe it. I spent countless hours looking for the “miracle creams” and hundreds of dollars. I looked into plastic surgery and laser treatemts. Every time that I would feel sad and hopeless my husband would tell me that I was beautiful and that he was so lucky to be with me. Around the 4th month after having my baby my depressing got out of control. I refused to stay home alone with the baby and I would often hand him off to whoever was around so that I could “live my own life” I am now 7 months post partum and I have a new outlook on life. I went back to work which made a huge difference. Talking about how I felt with my mom and close friends helped me get my problems and anger out. I now weight 140 pounds and have about 10 more to drop. Its definatelly been a wild ride. I love my son more than anything. But being a teen mom is hard. I missed out on my high school graduation and prom. Those precious moments that I have with him however cannot be described. I couldnt have done all that I have without the love and support from my husband, my parents and my friends. I hope that my post will be able to give hope to someone. Anything is possible in life. I feel like this whole experience has completely changed my life around and for the better. I now have a purpose in life and that is my beautiful son and amazing husband. <3



Updated here.

Lost (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, First Pregnancy, Pregnant, Submissions 22 Comments

Here is me when I first found out I would be a mommy…since then a lot has changed. It seems as if everything I’d dreamed and waited for just shattered. My husband has had three deployments and this is the first time in nearly six years we’re under the same roof…so you’d think things would be somewhat close to perfect, right? I’m going into the 8th month now and found out he might (or has dumby…)been cheating on me. Naked pictures on his computer of four other girls, txt messages on his phone to “come over”….I’m at such a loss. Not only is it hard enough with the changes of my body and everything that is new, but now this. WHY! why would you do this to our family? I know he would make a great father but I’m completely at a loss with myself, how I feel, how I look, what to do with him, and my overall situation….talk about the one of the ultimate lows.




Struggling with my mommy body (Jenn)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Submissions 7 Comments

Hi I’m Jenn I had my first, and only, child five years ago. I was very lucky that I had no stretch marks despite being very big while pregnant, apart from a few faint ones that are hardly noticble on my breasts and bum. I carried my son very high and had a c-section. I never put on much weight while pregnant and lost about 5kg after he was born, but in the five years since then the weight has just piled on, I don’t know if that’s due to lack of sleep, stress or not eating or exercising properly — or maybe a combination of all these factors. I never had a small waist — in fact I was always quite chunky in the middle, but I found that after my son was born my stomach just collapsed and I now have a section of tummy that bulges out above the belly button and my body has become positively apple shaped. I am really struggling to lose the weight (about 15kg gained since he was born)and no matter how many sit ups and crunches I do, I still end up with a muffin top, jelly belly. The swimming costume I have on in the pictures actually holds my tummy in a little and the only tops I look good in are maternity tops — has anyone experienced this? I don’t want to go through life wishing I was thinner or my tummy was flatter and being miserable and self-conscious, and I don’t want cosmetic surgery. It astounds me that celebs look so great after their babies, even after twins. How do they do it? What also annoys me is that clothing stores seem to cater for teenage girls only and the bigger clothes and underwear are dowdy. It’s Christmas so I’m not going to spoil my vacation by going on a diet but I think after Christmas I am going to eat all my meals off a small plate, cut out all sugars, simple starches and fats, and try pilates. Weights just seem to make me chunkier. Anyone who has struggled and regained thier body ultimately, if you have any advice, please let me know. Wishing you all a merry festive season and happy new year.