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Fixing myself?

First of all I absolutely LOVE this site. I wish it were around after my daughter was born. She is 20 months old now, my only child, and I had her when I was 21. I absolutely love her and she is my world, but after she was born I felt like she “destroyed” my body. I love the positive comments here about stretch marks and sagging skin being badges of honor, but back then I really couldn’t see it that way. I was diagnosed with anorexia at the age of 12 and have been in and out of hospitals and treatment facilities ever since. Needless to say I have some major body image issues. I was healthy during my pregnancy for my daughter- ate right, didn’t fast, and ended up gaining 75 lbs as a result of both my diet and an excess of amniotic fluid. After my daughter’s birth I suffered from severe post-partum depression and ended up being institutionalized for a few weeks. I think the shock of my new body had a lot do do with that. So anyway last June I had a tummy tuck which I suppose I am glad I did, but had I seen a site like this and realized that this sagging extra skin is normal I may not have gone through with it. None of the women in my family had the type of bunching skin that you need to tuck into your jeans. Not even my mother who had twins! Not a stretch mark on any women in my family. I really thought I did something wrong during my pregnancy to cause what I thought was such an awful disfiguration. Recently (3 weeks ago) I also had a breast lift/reduction although that was more for medical purposes, as after breastfeeding my daughter my breasts went up past DD which killed my back considering I’m living here on a 5’2 frame. Anyways here are some pictures of the current me…though I still haven’t lost all of the weight I put on while pregnant. I will try to post some of the ones of my big pregnant belly soon..they’re on my other computer :)






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11 comments… add one
  • Sara Thursday, April 12, 2007, 3:28 pm

    You look wonderful! You made the choices you did with the information you had at the time, and you came out healthy which is all that matters. You truly look great and you should be proud that you’re winning the battle with such a terrible disorder.

  • WSM Thursday, April 12, 2007, 7:07 pm

    You look beautiful and, as Sara said above, you made the best choices you could with the information you had at the time. I doubt I would have done differently. The scars on your breasts look wonderful–I’ve had a breast reduction myself, for medical reasons, and I can reassure you that they will fade in time. Feeling will also slowly but steadily return. I know this means little, coming from a stranger you will never meet, but you are beautiful and have a body to be proud of, particularly considering the terrible battles you have fought and won.

    Be well.

  • JSS Thursday, April 12, 2007, 8:15 pm

    One of my favorite quotes in the world is by Maya Angelou, “You did what you knew how to do and when you knew better, you did better.”

    Now that you know better you can do better and teach your daughter too!

    And I agree, you do look wonderful :)

  • Amy Wednesday, April 18, 2007, 5:47 pm

    Thanks for sharing your story. Great job on overcoming your disorder for the benefit of nourishing your baby! That shows what a strong woman you are! You look fabulous! Your tummy looks so pretty and I’ve never seen the results of breast surgery before. Thanks for sharing that too. They look good. :)
    Amy

  • Sasha Tuesday, April 24, 2007, 8:18 am

    You are beautiful!!! After trying to breastfeed my son unsucessfully I am now at an H cup on my 5’4 frame and am too going to get a reduction done.

  • Jenna-lee Wednesday, May 23, 2007, 5:48 pm

    Thanks for posting your pix. I’ve been considering a breast reduction for years but want to wait until I’m done having kids/breastfeeding. I was so nervous about the scars but yours look great. I understand that you are not happy with your body but I have to say I wish I had a nice flat tummy like yours. You may not think so but believe me, I’ve always had a flabby tummy no matter how many crunches I do (and I can do 500!) and since my daughter was born 2-1/2 years ago, it’s terrible! One more baby and then I’m getting everything tucked and lifted. Thank you again for showing us how good it can look.

  • Margot Tuesday, August 7, 2007, 8:50 pm

    I love the breast reduction scars! I had mine done when I was sixteen, and it’s so nice to see other women who aren’t ashamed of them.

    It’s just nice to see women who aren’t ashamed of societal “imperfections”!

  • Karina Thursday, September 13, 2007, 2:40 am

    hi there! i know how you feel, i was bulimic for almost five years. i have a 5 month old daugter and i’m still very conscious about how i look. i try not to think about it too much but i feel awful about my saggy and soft breasts. what exactly did u have done in that operation? how much did you pay?

  • Marie Friday, September 14, 2007, 12:49 pm

    My first procedure I had a small amount of lipo because the dr. told me that my upper abdomin was full of too much fat to match up to the lower portion of my torso during the tummy tuck. 3 months later I had the tummy tuck. Those procedures were about 9,000 altogether. The breast reduction I had a yr later and it was covered by insurance because it was deemed medically necessary.

  • amanda Tuesday, October 30, 2007, 7:13 pm

    you look great. i am considering a breast reduction this dec. i am very nervous. i have been battling with bulimia since i was 16, now i am 29. i am afraid that i will still feel chubby with c breasts compared to my 32 e that i have now. what do i do??

  • marie Monday, December 3, 2007, 3:12 pm

    Amanda, obviously I am an advocate for plastic surgery if that is the choice someone wants to make and if it is something you feel you need to do then I think you should as long as you are fully informed and aware of any and everything that can go wrong. I had the breast reduction bc of the stress on my back. I would probably recommend seeing someone like a therapist to talk about your body issues before you make a drastic decision. I hope you will let us know how it turns out. Good luck!

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