Author: Bonnie (SOAM)

Breastfeeding Breasts and Mommy Belly (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Breasts, Mom over 30, Postpartum, Second Pregnancy, Submissions 8 Comments

My name is Susan I am 32, and have two babies. My daughter is 2 and my son is 10 months. I nursed my daughter for 12 months and I am currently nursing my 10 month old. They were both full term and healthy natural births. Ive always been thin. Iam petite, just 115lbs and 5’3″. I gained 25 lbs with both babies and lost all the baby weight. Even though I am my prepregnancy weight I am definitely softer, not as toned and more veiny. I don’t mind my new body. I had small perky 32b breasts, now they are 34b. In this photo I just nursed my son on the right side so you can see its a bit smaller. My left one is always been bigger and it’s engorged in that side. I just returned from work and hadn’t pumped in 9 hours. My breasts are bigger but when I wean the babe in two months they will probably go down.

Young and Feeling Hopeless (Amelia)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Submissions, Teen Mom 15 Comments

Hi there, first off I would like to start by saying that when I found this website I was so happy to be able to relate to other real woman who feel the same way that I do. A lot of stories on here have helped me to begin to accept my new body, but I still have the days where I feel so sad about my body I dont even want to go out in public. When I had my daughter I was 17 years old, very young yes I know, but I adjusted to motherhood completely and I wouldn’t change it for the world. I am now 18 and 1 year postpartum. Before I got pregnant, I was comfortable in my own skin, and now I look at other women and just wish I had their stomach lol I used to take mine for granted, and
I never realized how important it was before this. I just wanted to share the way I feel and a little bit about my story because I hope that atleast one woman out there will feel better about themselves after reading this or even be able to relate to me and know that there is someone else out there who knows what you are going through. The hardest part about it is that I can’t even look in the mirror anymore without feeling sadness and getting this horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach because I am so unhappy with my body. I look at celebrities who have just had babies and they look amazing! And I know I know they get things done and have a lot of money to be able to fix the scars and stretch marks and all the other fun stuff that comes along with being pregnant, but I can’t help but feel worse about my body after seeing them. I love my daughter with all my heart and soul and I would go through it all over again if I had to because even though I can’t stand to look at my body, it was all worth it in the end, and to be able to be part of making a human being who is part of you, and have their little fingers, and toes, and heart, and lungs grow inside of you is an amazing thing and thats what makes us woman so special. So even though we may not like these stretch marks or c-section scars, or the saggy mummy tummys, they’re badges of what we went through and what an amazing thing we did by being pregnant and giving birth and we shouldn’t be embarrassed by them or ashamed by them because it brought us beautiful miracles from God. Anyways I hope that this makes someone feel beautiful and brings them more confidence and acceptance of their body.

Feeling Myself Again, Even Though I’m So Different (Amanda C)

Bonnie (SOAM) Before Pregnancy, Belly, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Pregnant, Submissions 5 Comments

~Age: 24
~Number of pregnancies and births: 1
~The age of your children, or how far postpartum you are: 9 and a half months daughter Sadie…

My name is Amanda I am 24 and have had one pregnancy where I gave birth to my daughter May 17 2011. She is almost 10 remember being about 6 months pregnant and was thinking that I was safe no weight gain no stretch marks.. i still remember the day i spotted just 1 stretch mark and started to panic i went straight to the pharmacy to get bio-oil and three other stretch mark creams … I remember crying and hating my body as I went from being 160lbs to 230 at the end of my pregnancy… I had stretch marks on my boobs, legs. arms, back of my knees, hips and stomach. At the end of my pregnancy I should have been so happy to have my beautiful daughter and well I was extremely happy!! I was depressed about the way i looked i didn’t want pictures taken with my daughter i didn’t want anyone seeing me i basically hid out in my house. I was just not myself i didn’t smile i didn’t laugh i didn’t joke. … as on January 10 2012 I stopped sulking and finally did something i started dieting and exercising and have managed to lose 35 lbs so far! i went from 230 to currently 195! My stretch marks are still there but I now love them!! there is a mark for every wiggle every breath and every blink my angel took while my body withstood amazing obstacles and HOUSED a life that I brought to this earth <3 I thought it was the stretch marks that were my biggest problem but they weren't the problem was my weight which i had to realize I CAN CONTROL I just have to try! Now that i am losing weight i feel great! i want to go for walks get out of the house I want to show off my body WITH my new stretch marks!! I want everyone to know I had a baby! THIS BODY MADE A LIFE! Some may think its ugly or even disgusting to look at but that's really completely fine with me cause these stretch marks represent where I met the love of my life.. they represent the most important thing in my life <3 I feel so empowered! Its just so amazing that something I was so terrified of something I couldn't control or prevent became my stripes of pride! Pic 1 and 2: Are pre pregnancy pictures (when i thought i was my happiest) Pic 3: Is me 6 and a half months pregnant. Pic 4: Is me 9 months pregnant ( big weight gain) Pic 5 and 6: when I gave birth to my angel (notice my stretch marks) Pic 7 and 8: my post pregnancy weight gain you can just tell by the look on my face that i am not happy at all. No confidence ... Pic 9: here i was at about 20 pounds weight loss!! I Look so ALIVE compared to my previous 2 post pregnancy pictures. pic 10 and 11: Are ME CURRENTLY!! what my belly looks like now at almost 10 months post partum... lost 35 lbs since January 10!! [gallery]

Trying to Accept My Body (Candy)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Breasts, Butt, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Submissions 22 Comments

I am 20 years old, I was 19 when I found out I was pregnant.
I was really excited, and my baby is the best thing that has ever happened to me.
I am a single mom and it TERRIFIES me to look for a relationship because of the stretch marks the pregnancy left
on my breasts and buttocks.

I have no problem with staying single for the rest of my life, but I don’t think it’s right.

(Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Cesarean, Postpartum, Pregnant, Second Pregnancy, Submissions 5 Comments

Okay girls I am 25 years old 5’4 and 165 wretched pounds. I have had two beautiful daughters one will be 4 in Aug and the other is 6 months. They are my life along with my amazing husband. He makes it a point to tell me how beautiful I look everyday although I beg to differ. I am a wreck after having my babies. I am 45lbs overweight and that isn’t even back to my pre-pregnancy weight. I have joined myfitnesspal.com, my local gym and do tae-bo, yoga some days at home. I do my best to control my eating and keep my work outs regular, but my stomach is a disaster zone. It is deflated like a balloon and my incision is crooked and the stretch marks are like a road map of the trials I have endured. I am learning a difficult lesson about self appreciation and love. I have been almost depressed over my current appearance and finally took a step back and realized I NEED to be positive. I need to love myself before I can fix myself and I need to give it my everything and not give up due to lack of results as I did after my first pregnancy. I want to believe my husband when he tells me I am beautiful but I do not feel that way, so this is my goal to learn how to accept a compliment instead of shunning it or having some lame comeback like yeah…right…to learn to say thank you and to love who I am no matter what I look like because I can control most of that. We are all beautiful and having beared children is an amazing gift and Bonnie is right this is exactly what a real WOMAN’S body looks like not air brushed and photoshoped, real women with real success stories and amazing triumphs over person struggles…this is us.

The first pic is of my at my baby shower…the second two are my body right now….the third/fourth is my body with clothes on now and me with my babies.

My Battle Scars – Otherwise Known as My Belly (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) 5+ Years Postpartum, Belly, Mom over 30, Postpartum, Submissions, Third Pregnancy 14 Comments

I am a 37 year old mother of 3 (ages 15, 9 & 7 yrs old). Lets just say I was done family planning by the time I was 30 yrs old.

I was always a fit person before having children, working out 3x a week and was a former gymnast and track star. But that all changed once I started to have children. My son was born when I was just 22 years old. I gained 55lbs with him, considering I used to be a size 4…that was devastating. But I loved being pregnant, however I retained a lot of water. After he was born it took me over a year to get back down to a size 6. Which I was more than happy about.

Then came my daughter 6 years later, followed by my youngest in which they were only 18 months apart. And again it was hard work to lose the weight and to get to where I am now.

I have over 10lbs to lose but I don’t want to be a size 0…I’m voluptuous …and I don’t mind. I have a personal trainer in which he tells me I have more muscle than fat and not to beat myself up too much. So in the meantime, I am working very hard to get rid of my saggy belly and to firm up, I will not consider surgery, besides I’m not a celebrity no one will really care after all…but I’m doing this for me!

My husband has been very supportive and showers me with compliments all the time, we are very much still in love and have been married for 12 years now. The reason why I am posting this is because my husband thinks I’m beautiful and loves my body despite my stretch marks (which have faded) but he doesn’t mind my saggy belly either, I told him he must be crazy because I hate my body.

When going on vacations I was very self conscience and would only wear a tankini’s or a one piece suit (which I hate!) But our next trip coming up is to Cancun and I got the courage to buy a bikini and show off my marks! I decided that as long as my husband didn’t care, why should I right? After all I’m happily married with wonderful children right? So I went shopping with the hubby and he bought me a Marc Jacobs bikini! I still can’t believe I bought it considering the price…I wanted my body to look decent before I spent that kind of $ on a bikini but my hubby was encouraging and voila…I’m showing you my pic!

I even asked my youngest girls how I looked in it (and since children are very honest) they said “you look good mommy!” and that put a smile on my face! So for those who are depressed about the saggy skin or the stretch marks after having children, I say go for it and buy that bikini! After all, I think to myself every line … every bulge was so worth it!

Thanks for reading my story!

I Feel So Insecure (Rebecca)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Second Pregnancy, Submissions 7 Comments

age: 20 pregnancies: 2 births: 2 children: 2 girls aged 4 and 10 weeks PP: 10 weeks
Keywords: second pregnancy, belly, normal delivery, stretch marks,breastfeeding.

“My body has changed so much”. Thats the first thing that crosses my mind when i look at my body in the mirror. Nothing will ever make my body the way it used to be. How could my beautiful children make my body look and feel so unattractive. I can’t help but feel so insecure about my body, no matter how much one reassures me. Pregnancy is such a beautiful thing and i enjoyed mine thoroughly, my children were so worth it, i just cant help but feel awful. But this site has opened up my eyes alot, and i think its a great way of helping women get over their post partum woes. Thankyou to all these women for making me smile. I hope someone can read this and relate and realise their not alone too. :-)

Photos:
Me au natural
Belly before second pregnancy
37 weeks pregnant
My baby Anna
pp 10 weeks side
pp 10 weeks front

“I don’t care what I have as long as it’s healthy.” (Shannon)

Bonnie (SOAM) Child Loss, Children with Health Complications, Postpartum, Second Pregnancy, Submissions, Update 20 Comments

Previous posts:
Missing my baby boy and expecting my second.
5 Weeks PP Second Baby
2.5 Months Postpartum, Second Cesarean in 2.5 Years
6 Months PP Update
15 Months PP Update
I Need Some Help

Age: 25
Pregnancies & Births: 2 pregnancies and 2 cesareans
How far pp: Connor would be 5.5 and Liam is 2.10

You hear it all the time. It is the most popular pregnancy conversation: “Do you want a boy or a girl?”, “I don’t care what I have as long as it’s healthy.”. For some reason this actually bothers me. Do I understand why we as mothers want our children to be healthy? Of course I do! However, children with challenges; whether it be a cleft palate, a heart condition, down syndrome, Marshall Smith syndrome, or cystic fibrosis; are the most perfect children. They are happy, strong, amazing little bundles of joy. It is an honor to bring these miracles into the world. Of course all babies are miracles, but these children are even more so. It is a miracle in itself that they survived pregnancy and birth! Connor may not have been healthy, but he was most certainly perfect! This is what I used to say when I was pregnant with Connor’s brother, Liam…”I don’t care what I have, as long as it’s happy.”. Isn’t this what really matters in life? We all strive for happiness. This is why we find love, get married, have children, pick jobs that we love, want to make good money…it is all to be happy. Most special needs children do not even need to try for this. Look around, now many depressed down syndrome children do you know? They are happy, they are loved, and they are miracles. So, I ask you to do this…the next time someone asks you what you want, tell them, “I don’t care, as long as it’s happy!”…this will make them look at the growing inside of them in a whole different light :)

15 Months to Find That Love (Amanda)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Postpartum, Submissions, Tattoo, Update 3 Comments

This is an update submission, my original post is here.

I feel as though those words cannot be the last thing I say on the matter of my motherly shape. It took me a year to come around to myself and the image if what I ‘should’ look like, to realize, I look how exactly how I am meant look, nothing less and nothing more.
I had this image in my head of a woman who would bounce back and within a year be fit and skinny, no evidence that she had ever given birth.

But after a year, I have realized, why on Earth would I ever want that?

I would be so devastated now if suddenly my stretch marks disappeared and I didn’t have this softer belly, not because I suddenly decided these things were sexy, but because that’s part of my life story. That’s apart of my daughter’s story and I would never want to take that away from her… or me.

A co-worker of mine recently revealed she was pregnant and we were talking about this website. I decided I would reread my post and what I found broke my heart. I was so sad and so unsatisfied with myself. I can feel the hurt, and all I want to do is jump back in time and say to myself “you won’t always feel this way”.

I have no more sadness when it comes to the shape of my body. I eat right and have recently started working out, not to lose weight, but to build strength and stamina. It’s time to respect my body rather than hate the way it looks for something it did, especially when that something it did is truly incredible.

My body made a life. Doesn’t that deserve respect and love? Instead of self-hatred, I have taken to self-love.

These are my new photos. My daughter is 15 months old now and I love my body. It’s the only one I will ever have, so I plan to treat it right.

You can still see the stretch marks, but they are very faded. The tattoos are still ruined, but tattoos can be fixed. My belly is still squishy and loose, but it’s a great place for my baby girl to rest her head.

I hope any women reading this who are struggling who’ve just had their babies know that time will make things better. Sometimes better isn’t about the physical, but how we perceive it.

Age: 29
Pregnancies/Births: 2/1