Author: Bonnie (SOAM)

Finally Confident in a Bikini….After Two Kids! (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Cesarean, Postpartum, Second Pregnancy, Submissions, Update, VBAC 12 Comments

This is my third submission to SOAM. My first was 2.5 years after my first son was born by Cesarean. My second was 1 month after my successful home VBAC. Now my VBAC baby is about to turn 1 year old and my journey with this body continues.

I haven’t worn a bikini since before my first son was born. I definitely had the body for it then, but after my kids, not so much. I was just a little too flabby, a little too dimply, a little too saggy, to be “good enough” to show off. Even though I had a body that my other mom friends envied, I wore a tankini with a full skirt in the pool.

Now that I am about to celebrate the victory of my triumphant VBAC, I am reflecting on how amazing my body really is and what spectacular gifts it can give me, not only in the form of my children, but in raw power. Despite what doctors told me, despite what people said to me, I know my body is awesome. And when we took our first family vacation to the beach this summer, I finally felt comfortable enough to show it off.

And do you know what I saw? I noticed lots of other mommies, young ones, older ones, moms of all ages and shapes, in their bikinis too. Dimply thighs, flabby tummys, floppy boobs and all. We were all there to have fun and soak up the sun with our families, not to look perfect and be admired. I realized that once you become a mom, it’s OKAY to be less than perfect. The “mom body” is expected and accepted. It makes me a little sad to know that for women who are not yet or won’t be moms, the onus of looking like Barbie might never go away. But once your body has carried and birthed a child, the only people who demand it to look like it did before are ourselves. No one else cares. This realization was very freeing, and I thoroughly enjoyed my vacation.

Here is a photo of me and my VBAC baby, who will be one year old on August 14th. I am 26 years old. My first child will be 5 next month.

090609-anon-1

Annoyed and Hiding (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Postpartum, Second Pregnancy, Submissions 47 Comments

why is it if you dont get a flabby pooch or stretch marks you get women saying nasty things about you (women who were unfortunate in the after baby dept)? I have had 2 kids, one is going to be 4 soon and one who is 9 months and I have no stretch marks or anything and didnt gain tons of weight, yet I get lots of dirty looks from fellow pregnant women, esp in the summer. I hate how some women get envious and call down those who dont get fat and say we must be having eating disorders or something cause we didnt gain 50 pounds…Im not trying to be a snob by any means but seriously, its annoying. And don’t get me wrong, i appreciate the good comments , and i LOVE my friends who have been unfortunate in this dept, but im sick of the ” OH I HATE YOU ” looks. they hurt too, because im starting to feel ashamed of my good belly. like i want to hide it because im afraid women will be offended that they cant / dont look like that. the picture on the beach is after my first baby, and the other one is now 9m pp 2nd child. i just want you all to know im not mean spirited im just wondering why if we look a certain way, GOOD OR “BAD” but in our own opinion its good, it makes us feel good and we feel good about ourselves, why do we still hide?

Your Age: 25
~Number of pregnancies and births:2 and 2
~The age of your children, or how far postpartum you are:4yrs and 9 mos

My E-Mail (Clarification)

Bonnie (SOAM) News 1 Comment

(This refers to my “contact me” e-mail – NOT the email for submissions, those are all taken care of.)

I had thought things were slow in terms of e-mail recently and today I happened to notice that ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING for at least a month has gone into spam. I suspect I’ve lost a lot more than that before this, so if I haven’t responded to you recently, please re-send. I’ll be working to catch up on August’s e-mails this week. Oy.

My Slow Road of Weight Loss (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Before Pregnancy, Belly, Cesarean, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Pregnant, Submissions 3 Comments

I gave birth to my beautiful son in February 2009 & have slowly lost all but 15 lbs of my baby weight. I have been staying accountable with my diet & exercise by logging everything online at a free weight loss support group. While I am not 110% body confident, I no longer stress about it b/c I have such a beautiful gift because of it. I used to be very pre-occupied with how my body looked, now I am simply happy to eat & exercise to be healthy, not to be the skinniest of all of my friends.

~Age: 29
~Number of pregnancies and births: 1 pregnancy & 1 birth
~The age of your children, or how far postpartum you are: 5 months PP

My photos are 5 weeks pregnant, 40 weeks pregnant, 4 weeks PP, 8 weeks PP, 12 weeks PP & 24 weeks PP

I Thought I Would be Hideous (Alesia)

Bonnie (SOAM) Before Pregnancy, Belly, Cesarean, Cesarean Scar and/or Incision, Complications During or After Birth, Complications in Pregnancy, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Pregnant, Submissions 12 Comments

as many of the stories i read on here during my pregnancy have said, i thought i was going to look hideous, i of course to was worried about the streach marks, saggy skin, disformed belly button, and all the other things you hear that come along with being a mother, i was terrified. and of course i, just like everyone else, was very body conscience before getting pregnant. but after going through a horrible ordeal,of being pre eclaptic, a 102 temp, b/p of 118/100, an irregular heart beat, fluid in my lungs, one collapsing, and being airlifted to a totally different hospital than my baby to be put in ICU and not even getting to see my son his first 5 days of life, i look at my body and its not all that bad. i gained somewhere close to 50 pounds during my pregnancy the last 20 i gained in the 3 weeks before i had my baby. i am back down to my pre pregnancy weithg of 135, granted i did get streatch marks the night before the morning i went in to labor.or atleast thats when i noticed them. they did end up on the top of my thighs as well, from me being pumped full of so much fluid during labor.( i didnt even lose any wight after birth, i actually gained 2 pounds after being in labor for 13 hrs), granted my belly button isnt disformed but it does look different since i had my baby, and though there isnt saggy skin per say, it is squisher than it once was, and i have one of those brown lines that might not go away. it could be much worse, i could not have my son at all, either way… we all age, and the skin we have today, will go away eventually and be nothing more than a memory
postpartum: 7 weeks
first pic: the day i found out i was pregnant
next: my tummy while pregnant, at 35 weeks
other 3, me today, the last one showing my wonderful c-section scar

What 6 Months of Weight Training Can Do! (Ashley)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Submissions, Update 62 Comments

You can read my full story in my 1st entry, but to sum things up: I was always pretty fit and a healthy weight but gained 60lbs during my pregnancy. Three months after giving birth I suffered from severe ankle injuries which left me pretty much unable to walk for 6 months. While I lost all the weight by 6 month PP I still felt jiggly and soft. I was able to start working out 9 months pp. I had a lot of muscle atrophy especially in my legs.

I have now had 6 months in the gym and I wanted to share “What 6 months of weight training” can do for a woman! I don’t like cardio so I haven’t done any other then going on walks pretty regularly. I lift weights for an hour a day 5 days a week. A lot of women are afraid to lift “heavy” weights, I want to show them that they won’t look like men if they pick up more the a 10lb weight! I’m TRYING to gain muscle and it’s not easy!

So to try to put things in prospective here are my “stats”:
Height: 5’9.5″
Weight: ~138-140lbs
Estimated One Rep Max Lifts:
Bench Press: 156lbs
Squat: 168lbs
Dead Lift: 168lbs
Leg Press: 600+lbs

I can do 30+ military style push-ups, only 4 military pull-ups (working on bringing that up), I can do 3 sets of 10 dips with my body weight, I’m doing bicep curls with 25 to 30lb dumbbells, etc.

I still want to get stronger but I’m pretty proud of how far I’ve come in 6 months! I think I lift pretty heavy and I sure don’t think I look “too big or manly” lol. Hopefully this will inspire some other mama’s to pick up the weights too!

-1st 2 pics: My progress, the 1st pic is 8wks pp, the second is 6 months later (I had lost the weight but not made it to the gym), 3rd pic is 6 months after the 2nd with 6 months of weight lifting (15mo pp).
-The 3rd pic is of my ab progress with 1yr between photos.
-The 4th Pic is of my ab progress with 6 months between (after I’d lost the weight to after 6 months in the gym).
-The 5th pic is my back.
-The 6th pic is back/shoulders/arms flexed.
-The 7th is front/shoulders/arms flexed.
-The 8th pic is of my legs flexed.
-AND the last one’s just for fun.

~Age: 27
~Number of pregnancies and births: 1
~The age of your children and how far postpartum you are: 16 months (15 months in the last pictures)

Updated here.

Update (Roxy)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Submissions, Update 7 Comments

Previous entry here.

hey ive posted my story when I was 1month pp and my selfesteem was very low because my pregnancy left me in a pretty bad shape, but Ive worked my self up. Ive been doing a lot of exercise, running, walking etc,and I have noticed that I have improved alot. My stretch marks are still there but I have tried a lot of diferent lotions and they have fade away a lot. The skin ripped looks better and after 7months I feel sexy again.

The pictures are me when I was 1moth pp and 8months pp (now) and my little princess.

Breasts, Acceptance (Autumn)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Breasts, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Submissions, Teen Mom, Update 13 Comments

My name is Autumn, I’m 21 (22 in September), and almost 4 years postpartum.
I’ve posted here 3 or 4 times before, mainly with updates. This time I wanted to share my postpartum breasts (my belly is included, too!).

(Previous entries here, here and here.)

I’ve always been extremely insecure about my breasts, when I was a teenager I used to cry almost every time I looked in the mirror and I’d avoid the mirror until I had to shower, because I was so ashamed of my breasts. Thinking back, I don’t understand what I was seeing that was so awful and realizing they were actually quite pretty back then, made me realize I may not be seeing them in the correct light nowadays. I’ve been on a mission recently to feel as little shame about my body as humanly possible. I’m sick of devouring myself in insecurity. I’ve come to accept each of my body parts in their own time, I’ve been okay with my tummy, legs, butt, etc for awhile now. But I just could shake off the insecurities about my breasts, and seeing the breasts in the media (mainly movies that my husband watches, mainstream movies that tend to have breasts) really did not help me in coming to terms with them. So I started Googling natural breasts and was very pleasantly surprised at the amount of breasts that resembled mine and the fact that the super perky perfect ones didn’t completely monopolize the search. They were there, but I didn’t feel threatened by them with how many other breasts weren’t super perfect (but were still very attractive!). Over the last couple of weeks I’ve found acceptance for myself as a package and I’ve never felt so good. It’s a wonderful feeling not being down on myself every second of the day. So I figured since this site has helped me immensely in coming to terms with my body and seeing that I am attractive, in spite of what the media tells us, I would add these photos to show I’m no longer ashamed!

Updated here.

Two Blessings (Jess)

Bonnie (SOAM) Before Pregnancy, Belly, Child Loss, Complications in Pregnancy, First Pregnancy, Postpartum, Pregnant, Submissions, Twins 17 Comments

Age: 24
Pregnancies: 1
Children: 2

I was told round 20 years old that I would not be able to have children. Then at 23 I had some further complications and the Dr’s did a surgery to remove massive growths on my ovaries and told me it was a long shot, but if I wanted to try and have children now was the time. Within two months I was pregnant. I went in at 8 weeks with heavy bleeding and tissue… I thought I had miscarried, they did an immediate ultrasound and said “There is heartbeat A, and there is heartbeat B…” My husbands mouth dropped and I just laughed. Come to find out I had had a miscarriage (I was preggo with triplets) but still had two healthy heartbeats! We were ecstatic! The first 20 weeks my pregnancy were great, I was working out, had only gained about 16lbs and really looked good (so I thought) then I went in and my world changed… I was diagnosed with an incompetant cervix and was told I was funnelled out to about 2mm of cervix left… I was put on strict bedrest. Needless to say week after week I kept trucking along. At 28 weeks they told me 2 weeks longer of pregnancy would be a miracle… at 30 weeks I was thinned to .7mm and dialted to 2 cm… still pregnant and still had two healthy babies! At 35 weeks I went into preterm labor and was dialted to 5cm and completely thinned out, but my contractions stopped and I was sent home… at 37 weeks I had no change… I had now gained 70lbs and had more water retention than most had ever seen in the hospital (so they say) Finally at 38 weeks and one day they started me on pitocin and after 5 hours only dilating to a 7 they broke my water and gave me my epi and 11 hours I pushed out our little girl and 52 minutes later I pushed out our boy… they were a healthy 6lbs each! We were told we would never have children and now have two beautiful babies… now back to me!

I had a really hard time gaining weight, I was 140lbs prepregnancy, but with only 18% body fat, I have always been active and have worked out my whole life and try hard to stay at a healthy size 6… I gained 70lbs and had bad bleeding for 3 months after my pregnancy… I only lost 40lbs the first 4.5months post pregnancy… finally I was given the okay to start working out again, I was no longer in my size 6’s but more in a size 11/12… I have been working out for 2.5 months and have lost an additional 15lbs… I still have 15 to go, but I am feeling better about my body and my progress. Our babies are healthy and happy and everytime I get down on myself about how awful I look, I just look at their beautiful smiles and tell myself that it’s a miracle I was able to bring them to this earth and that my body will one day be acceptable… my husband loves me more than before and still finds me sexy (he tells me this often!) Thank you for this site, I feel so lucky to share my experience and feel a little better about being a woman…

The first picture is pre-pregnancy at 138lbs
The second picture is me a day before delivering
The third-fifth are my 7 months PP pictures at 160lbs
and the final are my gorgeous babies

4 Months PP (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Postpartum, Second Pregnancy, Submissions, Teen Mom 13 Comments

im a single teen mother of two . im 17 and im 4 months post partum .. i fell in love at a young age wanted a baby for unconditional love & to be in love got dumped pregnant with my second do to the work of a home wrecker , & a bad father =[ im comepletly devistated but my children keep me the happiest mother alive im so proud of them & what ive created . i was great when i had him (babydad) in my life well when we were happy , i dident feel the need to look perfect because i had who i fell in love with & dident need to look good for any body but him … i was with him for about 5 years now im soo devistated and heart broke i really thought this would truley never happen … but i thank god for my babies they keep me going seeing little kicky feet and smiles every mornin . heres my belly 4 months post partum i truley want to get a tummy tuck for my new and single me….. 082409-anon-1

082409-anon-2

082409-anon-3

082409-anon-4