5 months pp
Children: 2, 5 months
I am having a hard time adjusting to the new “me.” Everyone tells you that you can not imagine how changed your life will be after children, and it is, down to the smallest detail. Suddenly your time is not your own, your identity and worth is inexorably intertwined with this tiny human, and even your body does not fully belong to you anymore.
I don’t recognize the body I see in the mirror. I see an old lady’s stomach. A flabby pooch where my babies once grew. Breasts, so full of milk now. that will flag and deflate the second they are no longer needed. I see stretchmarks tattooing my virgin skin, and wrinkles around my navel. Who knew a belly button could grow wrinkles?
But then I stop looking in the mirror. Who has time for that these days anyway? I will probably never love this new body of mine, but I have two new bodies to love. Two pieces of my heart, laughing, growing, loving. And that’s all anybody needs.