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2 Kids in 2 Years (Anonymous)

December 16, 2010

Age: 26
5 months pp
Children: 2, 5 months

I am having a hard time adjusting to the new “me.” Everyone tells you that you can not imagine how changed your life will be after children, and it is, down to the smallest detail. Suddenly your time is not your own, your identity and worth is inexorably intertwined with this tiny human, and even your body does not fully belong to you anymore.

I don’t recognize the body I see in the mirror. I see an old lady’s stomach. A flabby pooch where my babies once grew. Breasts, so full of milk now. that will flag and deflate the second they are no longer needed. I see stretchmarks tattooing my virgin skin, and wrinkles around my navel. Who knew a belly button could grow wrinkles?

But then I stop looking in the mirror. Who has time for that these days anyway? I will probably never love this new body of mine, but I have two new bodies to love. Two pieces of my heart, laughing, growing, loving. And that’s all anybody needs.

Updated here.

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20 Responses to “2 Kids in 2 Years (Anonymous)”

  1. beth Says:
    December 16th, 2010 at 11:40 am

    are the 2 first pics before or after kids? if its after you look AMAZING!!!!!!!

  2. Mary V Says:
    December 16th, 2010 at 11:48 am

    Are those pre-pregnancy photos…? If they are not, I dont see what you wrote about at all, “old lady’s stomach”… I wish that was my stomach! You have such a cute baby belly! Congratulations Mama!

  3. lisa Says:
    December 16th, 2010 at 12:40 pm

    you said it perfectly – time to focus on and love the new bodies! good for you!

  4. Karla Says:
    December 16th, 2010 at 1:22 pm

    You must have sent the wrong pictures girl! cause what I see are pictures of a pre pregnancy body…now..if this is you now…I hope you can see what I see cause it’s nothing like you described!

  5. ollie Says:
    December 16th, 2010 at 1:55 pm

    are these before pics? you have the most beautiful pregnancy belly i have.ever.seen. no joke. :)

  6. aa Says:
    December 16th, 2010 at 2:12 pm

    wow! I had 2 kids in 2 years as well (13 months apart) & my body looked nothing like yours afterwards, but I did gain 48lbs. You look like you’ve bounced back. Way to go! I love your perspective & point of view on motherhood.

  7. Shannon Says:
    December 16th, 2010 at 3:31 pm

    I mean this in the best possible way…you need to seek help. This post makes ME want to cry about MY body…you think you look bad…you would be so disgusted to look at me. You have no pooch, no stretchmarks, no flab…you should see a self esteem therapist.

  8. Colleen Says:
    December 16th, 2010 at 4:28 pm

    You had a beautiful pregnant belly, and you wrote a beautiful post. Thank you :)

  9. Marz Says:
    December 16th, 2010 at 5:30 pm

    Are you kidding? you look amazing for having a kid (much less TWO kids)– you look amazing period! I know the softness take getting used to, and you may never fully accept it. But your stomach does NOT look like an old lady’s at ALL.
    I’m glad that you’re able to put aside your dissatisfaction and love your children (i’m sure you’d love them no matter what), but I hope you’re able to one day look in the mirror and see just how beautiful your body is.

  10. Mrs.Petunia Says:
    December 16th, 2010 at 5:43 pm

    I don’t mean to be mean but you are insane!!! Are those the afters? Because if they are all I can say is that you are ridiculously lucky! I don’t see any wrinkles or stretch marks or flabby skin. All I see is a fit, toned, seemingly unscathed tummy. That’s miraculous for a twins birth, or any birth for that matter. Perhaps they are the befores……

  11. Mrs.Petunia Says:
    December 16th, 2010 at 5:45 pm

    Oops, I guess you didn’t have twins, just two singlets. At any rate…..still freakin lucky :)

  12. lacee Says:
    December 16th, 2010 at 6:12 pm

    Wow! Honestly this kind of makes me mad. Your stomach looks perfect. Your ribs are showing on the side. But yet you don’t think you can ever love your new body?? It shocks me! I would LOVE to look like you. Very confused by this!

  13. Olivia Says:
    December 16th, 2010 at 9:25 pm

    Thank you for the kind comments. I know that I am fortunate regardless of what my body looks like as I have been lucky enough to give the gift of life and that was more the point of my post than anything. I was quite thin and fit before kids, and while these pics may not do justice to the stretchmarks, softness and wrinklies I now have (low res pics) they certainly are there and they weren’t before. I think as women we are our own harshest critics, I know I am my own. It’s hard to see the way my stomach sags and wrinkles when I lie on my side, like a deflated balloon, or the way my breasts are trying their damndest to have a rendevous with my belly button. But I am working on loving it because my body made the two bodies I love the most. I would never, ever think any mother’s body was anything less than beautiful, and I hope my effort to get past my own petty insecurities doesn’t make it seem that I do. Since I’ve found this site I have logged on everyday and marvelled and the beauty that is womanhood, in ALL its shapes and forms.

  14. Susy Says:
    December 17th, 2010 at 4:35 pm

    You are definitely being too hard on your body. You look freaking amazing! You can say the pics don’t do justice but really, I’m sure you still look amazing, even close up and on macro setting.

  15. jane Says:
    December 17th, 2010 at 9:33 pm

    This honestly makes me want to cry. I have stretch marks everywhere from my kids and if i looked like you i would be SO HAPPY it’s not even funny.. This just makes me MORE depressed.didn’t think that was possible!

  16. Lauren Says:
    December 19th, 2010 at 12:01 pm

    I know what you mean about the belly button wrinkle! I have one just a little deeper than yours right over my belly button – but in all honestly I have come to think of it as being kind of cute. I don’t think it will ever go away, since the more weight I lose I assume the more pronounced it will become. But, I have at least 10 pounds to go before I have a FLAT gorgeous stomach like yours. You look freakin HOT. Before I was pregnant I was trying to look like you do now. So just look in the mirror and smile :)

  17. Jen Says:
    December 20th, 2010 at 1:29 pm

    i think you look great, and am pretty confused. are you sure you don’t have body dysmorphic disorder? i never want anyone to feel i’m dismissing their own issues w/ their body, cuz we all have some i think, but it’s really depressing to see someone in as good as shape as you complain about their body. i think your post was very inspiring, i was just shocked when i saw the pics you find troubling. women w/o kids would kill for that stomach. and you even see your ribs…anyway, you look great…i don’t know how you can’t see that…

  18. Nina Says:
    December 21st, 2010 at 11:35 pm

    i see no issues here at all…you got super lucky.

  19. Holly Says:
    December 25th, 2010 at 11:41 pm

    I agree with Jen. You need to seek help. In my opinion (I’m not a doctor), It’s very possible that you have BDD. Either that or the pictures you posted are pre-babies. I’m so confused by this post!

  20. Sergeant Mom Says:
    April 29th, 2011 at 8:55 am

    No one has the right to talk to you like that or to tell you to “Get Help” Whatever happened to this site not being about fat or anything like that? I thought it was about every mother’s view of her own body. I have read most post on here and this one is the only one that pisses me off! Nice one ladies, way to be catty and mean. I am still thin after having my son, but EVERY part of me that has changed, my lip has a dark place on it so it looks like I have a mustache, my hips are wide, I have a baby pouch, my ass is dimpled and not hot anymore… but I am 5’6 and 130 lbs so I am not considered big at all. But this site is NOT what others see, it is what us as mothers see our bodies and how they have changed.

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