VBAC

Twin Skin… 4 babies in less than 4years (Jane)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Cesarean, Postpartum, Submissions, Third Pregnancy, Twins, VBAC 24 Comments

I married a wonderful man and we were excited to start our family relatively quickly. First baby was a healthy, full term girl.
I was quite sure that I had done well to stay in a healthy range, after all, I had always been slim and I believed, based on my genetics that pregnancy would be no different.
My baby came out smaller than average, but perfectly healthy however when I looked in the mirror after the birth I was surprised to find that nothing looked the same. There were stretch marks and a flabby distended stomach that seemed far too large considering the baby that had just exited it.
I chose to cover it all up and think about it at a later date. I had much better things to do, like enjoy being a mother.
I didn’t worry about the weight, and I happily breast fed for 14months. When I stopped the weight had (almost) all dissapeared (somewhere in the 14mths it happened but it was so gradual I couldn’t pin point when).

We tried for number 2 at about this time, hoping to have a 2yr gap between babies. Hah, the best laid plans….
I took a test and it was negative, then after some tears (hormonal, no doubt) and a few more days I took another test. It was positive. I suffered through another severe round of morning sickness and begged for a scan at 13weeks to check on the baby.
When the lady first looked at the screen her face went blank and she turned off all the moniters. Turning to us with a serious face I braced myself for the news ‘there is no baby’… instead she said ‘ Are there twins in the family?’ I am not sure if I will ever forget the feelings that flooded me then, excitement, terror, joy and disbelief. I had no idea I was having twins…. what happened to the two year plan?!
Being a bit of a panicker, I prepared for the inevetible premature births and researched survival rates compulsively but despite all my worrying, I found myself at Full term DEMANDING to be induced!! I no longer could breathe, eat or sleep and I felt my stomach was about to pop at the seams… quite literally it was already starting. The network of stretch marks were like a huge doughnut around my belly button. I looked like I was trying to smuggle a watermellon under my shirt…. one of those big oval ones.

So via C-section I delivered two perfect babies, a boy and girl. I fed them for 4months and then had to swap to formula for sheer exhaustion and sleep deprivation- remembering that I had a toddler too.
Somehow I survived this period, and then when life became a little easier I felt the desire to have another. The twins were 19months when I had our 4th baby (an all natural birth, (VBAC). He was the most wonderfully easy baby and we now feel that we have our complete family, 2boys, 2 girls. They are wonderful, but ever since the birth of the twins my stomach has hung like a balloon that was blown up too big, then left to deflate behind a couch.
I returned to my pre-baby weight a year ago, but the more weight I lose, the more the skin on my stomach looks like an 90yr old mans face.

I do love my body… dressed, I appreciate far more than I did when I was young, but the stomach is too much!
I have posted pics to share with the world, so that others can see that this is what mothers do for their beautiful children!
After all, you would expect a well lived in home to show the footprints of its fellow residents… my tummy shows that 4 little people lived there! (and two of them insisted on using it to practice their kungfu moves on each other).
Hope it helps others!
I have included photos of my tummy from various angles, some are lying on my side, the last is leaning over to show the ‘hang’!(I thought this one might scare some people, so I hesitated in sharing, but hey, this is what the skin does when I bend over! ).

~Number of pregnancies and births: 3 pregnancies, 4 births
~The age of your children, or how far postpartum you are: 5, 3, 3, 1

2 Weeks PP – Update (Berni)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Postpartum, Second Pregnancy, Submissions, Update, VBAC 8 Comments

I originally posted around 3 months after the birth of my son, again at 6 and a half months pp, and 38 weeks into this pregnancy.

My daughter was born 10 days late on the 22nd December 2010. I had actually gone into hospital that day to book an elective C section, due to being post dates and already having had a section. I was so happy when my water started to leak that evening. I did not achieve my homebirth but it was a very straight forward vaginal delivery. I ended up transferring to hospital after about 5 hours of strong contractions, as I was in a lot of pain and still only 3cm dilated, my midwife was also a little concerned about the baby’s heartbeat and that I was dehydrated. Well I wish I stayed at home now because I reached 10cm delivered within an hour and a half! There was no time for any extra pain relief so I only had gas and air. I didn’t tear and I wasn’t cut which I was very happy about. She was only 7lb 12oz, so second babies are not always bigger (my first was 10lb 10oz) and growth scans are not always accurate (she was estimated to be 9lb+). We called her Lilac and she is so lovely. I’m so pleased that I managed to have a VBAC and I doubt I would have achieved it without the support of the wonderful midwife I had.

As for my body I am now 3 weeks pp and I have 10lbs to lose and I struggle to fit in clothes 2 sizes bigger than what I was wearing when I fell pregnant. My tummy is so horrible and saggy, I knew it would be as it was saggy after my son, but it seems more so now. I didn’t get any new stretch marks. I try not to think about my tummy too much as it does get me down. I hope in time I can become more positive about my body, especially now I have a daughter. Is there any way without surgery to improve lose skin?

The body pictures are 2 weeks PP.

The last picture is of me and Lilac on Xmas day (3 days old).

Finally Confident in a Bikini….After Two Kids! (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Cesarean, Postpartum, Second Pregnancy, Submissions, Update, VBAC 12 Comments

This is my third submission to SOAM. My first was 2.5 years after my first son was born by Cesarean. My second was 1 month after my successful home VBAC. Now my VBAC baby is about to turn 1 year old and my journey with this body continues.

I haven’t worn a bikini since before my first son was born. I definitely had the body for it then, but after my kids, not so much. I was just a little too flabby, a little too dimply, a little too saggy, to be “good enough” to show off. Even though I had a body that my other mom friends envied, I wore a tankini with a full skirt in the pool.

Now that I am about to celebrate the victory of my triumphant VBAC, I am reflecting on how amazing my body really is and what spectacular gifts it can give me, not only in the form of my children, but in raw power. Despite what doctors told me, despite what people said to me, I know my body is awesome. And when we took our first family vacation to the beach this summer, I finally felt comfortable enough to show it off.

And do you know what I saw? I noticed lots of other mommies, young ones, older ones, moms of all ages and shapes, in their bikinis too. Dimply thighs, flabby tummys, floppy boobs and all. We were all there to have fun and soak up the sun with our families, not to look perfect and be admired. I realized that once you become a mom, it’s OKAY to be less than perfect. The “mom body” is expected and accepted. It makes me a little sad to know that for women who are not yet or won’t be moms, the onus of looking like Barbie might never go away. But once your body has carried and birthed a child, the only people who demand it to look like it did before are ourselves. No one else cares. This realization was very freeing, and I thoroughly enjoyed my vacation.

Here is a photo of me and my VBAC baby, who will be one year old on August 14th. I am 26 years old. My first child will be 5 next month.

090609-anon-1

Successful UBA5C (Stacy)

Bonnie (SOAM) Birth, Breastfeeding, Cesarean, Four or More Pregnancies, Homebirth, Postpartum, Submissions, Update, VBAC 15 Comments

I am updating from my previous entry here…

I am ecstatic to announce the arrival of our son. He arrived vaginally, at home, 10#5oz, 22 1/2 and perfectly healthy. I have had 5 previous csections and have yet to even process the immense healing that has come and will come from this. I love this website and wanted to come here to share my story and God’s glory with all those who are seeking a VBAC of one sort or another, women contemplating UC or UBAC as well as women dealing with body issues. I have that I already seem myself as the most beatuiful woman in the world now. Seriously, I am SOOOO greatful for what my body has done, through all of my pregnancies and labors and birth and surgery. I am overjoyed!

Haven
3/30/09
10# 5oz
22 1/2 inch
14 3/4 head

Question CPD

Updated here and here.

Long Hard Road (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Breasts, Cesarean, Postpartum, Second Pregnancy, Submissions, Teen Mom, VBAC 10 Comments

I’ve never been perfect. I know this. But for most of my life I’ve been satisfied with my body. As a teenager I had a wonderful body in my opinion. No, I never fit into those size 0 jeans, but I was curvy, had a pretty flat stomach, and all of this was done with no effort. I could pig out all day for weeks on end and end up losing 5lbs. I adored my 36-26-36 hourglass figure.

I got pregnant with my son when I was 18. I absolutely loved it, but my body didn’t. My sedentary lifestyle wasn’t cutting it anymore and I gained a total of 60lbs before all was said and done. I managed to make it until my 8th month before the stretchmarks started coming, but when they did they came on full force. Suddenly I was covered all across my stomach, my hips, my butt, my thighs, and even on the back of my knees and calves. It was horrendous! After having my son I felt anything BUT sexy. And it didn’t help that I had him by c-section, so my confidence in my body was already shot down because I didn’t even feel like a woman anymore.

I lost a little of the weight but the stretchmarks remained behind as reminders of the wonderful little boy I carried for 9 months. Over time I gained more confidence and soon the stretchmarks faded from red to silver. But my body was still foreign to me and I’ve never felt quite comfortable in my own skin since…

Then almost 2 years later we decide to have another child. I kept my weight gain at a good 38lbs, only got a few more stretchmarks, and for the most part was happy that my body wasn’t falling apart again on me. I had a wonderful successful natural VBAC and regained the confidence in my body and how it worked. I wasn’t broken anymore.

But even that lift in spirits over the mechanics of my body still can’t override my dissatisfaction in the way I look. I keep telling myself that I’ve just given birth 2 months ago. That my body is a result of the beautiful children I’ve brought into this world. That I am beautiful. But every time I look in the mirror I see differently. I see the sagging breasts that have nourished my kids. I see the stretched out, saggy, loose, scarred stomach. I’m no longer that 36-26-36 I used to be. Now I’m 39-39-42. I’m fighting a war with myself. I’ll never be like I used to be and that’s fine with me. But I need to be comfortable at least. I can’t go on afraid to be sexual with my husband or avoiding mirrors when I change clothes. This has to stop.

So I’m traveling down a long hard road on a journey to find myself and the confidence that I used to have in my body. I’m not sure where or when I’ll find it, but I’m working on getting healthier and into shape. One day I’ll finally feel like me again and I can’t wait until that day comes….







Learning to Love My Body After 5 C-Sections, Pregnant With #6 – Hopeful VBAC (Stacy)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Cesarean, Four or More Pregnancies, Postpartum, Pregnant, Submissions, Teen Mom, Update, VBAC 65 Comments

With my first daughter, conceived at 17, I was not fuller aware of the changes that would take place. I was young, ignorant to nutrition and was raised with horrible eating and activity habits. I gained almost 80 pounds and ended my long labor in a csection. My first daughter is an absolute joy, and in many ways saved my life for sure destruction. I met my husband when she was 3. We conceived about 9 months later. We have created 5 more children together (on in my belly currently), in the past 6 years. My body has undergone quite the toll. Almost continual pregnancies and breastfeeding. I am in awe of what my body is able to handle… I am sure that this most soon come to an end, mostly because I have had 5 csections. I am attempting a VBAC with this pregnancy, and if it goes well, as I have much faith and hope it will, then maybe I will be up for more children, but otherwise I think my body ready to move on to the next stage (whatever that is :) These are some pictures I took. I am currently about 18 weeks pregnant with my 6th and learning a little more each day,each pregnancy, to love and accept my body just the way it is.



Updated here, here and here.

My Body Before and After HBAC (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Breasts, Cesarean, Homebirth, Postpartum, Pregnant, Second Pregnancy, Submissions, Update, VBAC 18 Comments

Previous post here.

I had my first child via C-section after a long traumatic labor when I was 21. I was told that my pelvis was misshapen, very small, and that I wouldn’t be able to birth a baby bigger than 6 lbs. Four years later, I birthed my second child into my own hands in a pool of water at home. (He was 8 lbs. 4 oz., by the way!) Cradling him as he left my body and entered this world was the most amazing experience of my life, and was worth all the stress, stigma, and emotional upheaval of working to achieve a vaginal birth after a C-section. I feel like I can do anything now. I am so proud of what my body did, and how it proved everyone wrong who told me I would never do this. The first picture is me at 39 weeks with my second pregnancy. The next two are me today at 1 month postpartum.





Updated here.