I gave birth to my first child, my son Draven, when I was 23. Instead of gaining weight with him, I actually lost 40 pounds. I was overwieght when I started my pregnancy, though, so he still grew fine and was born a healthy 7 pounds and 7 ounces. When he was four months old, my boyfriend and I found out that we were pregnant with our daughter, Lyric. She was completely uplanned, but we were excited nontheless. I gained about 20 pounds with her, and I’ve been able to lose most of it…I still have about 5 pounds hanging on. I haven’t tried all that hard to lose them though, lol. She was 8 pounds, 4 ounces, and is 9 months old now. I’ve always had trouble accepting my body, even before I had children. Ironically, I weigh about the same now as I did my senior year of high school, but I still don’t really like the way I look. Some of the time, I know that I don’t look bad…But some days, all I see are my breasts that are now two different sizes and saggy, and my flabby stomach. It’s funny, because I can look at pictures on here of women, and think, “Oh, there’s nothing wrong with her, she’s still totally beautiful.” But its hard for me to do that with myself, even when I’ve seen that my tummy is totally normal when compared to some of the other mommy tummies on here. Some of the positive attitudes that I’ve seen on here are simply amazing. I think more than anything I want to be able to love myself so that my children don’t grow up thinking that hating yourself is normal. Instead of looking at my body as some sort of mess, leftover from making something beautiful, I need to look at it for what it is: something beautiful in and of itself. Something that can create, something that can nurture… It’s hard for me to even type that, much less think it or feel it. I’m lucky that my boyfriend is so supportive of my post-baby body. He loved my body pregnant, and he loves it now. He’s never made any negative comments about it…all the negativity comes from me. I just need to learn to love my body too.