Pregnancy can make you feel like your body is no longer your own. It can ruin your self-esteem and make you hate the shell you’re living in. But for some people pregnancy can finally make you feel like your body is WORTH something. This is my story…
I’ve always been a bigger girl. I’ve hated my body my entire adult life. I have had stretch marks everywhere since I was 14. I went from a size 11 to a size 22 in about 4 years. It was devastating and I never thought I’d be able to love myself.
My fiance and I started trying to conceive in December of 2006. I knew that it would be a long hard road. (I have PCOS and it took a while to find out I wasn’t actually ovulating despite having normal periods thanks to Metformin.) I worked on my diet and I tried to exercise, knowing that losing weight would help my fertility and boost my confidence. I fluctuated between losing and gaining the same 10 pounds the entire time we tried to make this happen.
I am 5’4″ and weighed 247 pounds the day we got our positive pregnancy test. Surprisingly I’ve lost 11 pounds since then and I feel better about my body than I ever have in my entire life. I haven’t changed pants sizes or shirt sizes. I’ve gotten rounder and now that I finally look pregnant at 23 weeks I feel fabulous.
I may be overweight (according to most weight charts–morbidly obese) but god damn, I can make a human life, and that is what this is all about. My body can do what a size 6 body can do, what a size 11 body can do, what most women can do… and in the process make me happier than I have been in my life.
And for good measure, a pre-pregnancy picture, from about November 2006. And a belly picture from yesterday at 23 weeks 3 days pregnant.
~Number of pregnancies and births: This is my first pregnancy.