Never Happier With Myself (Anonymous)

i’m a twenty one year old first time mom. before i got pregnant i dieted constantly and went to gym every single day afetr work in order to achieve the body that i thought i was supposed to have. and it worked, if you want to think of it that way. i was a size two. but it was hard work and very stressful for me to stay that size. and no mater how flat my stomach was or how low the number on the scale dropped, i was always self conscious and unhappy with how i looked. when i got pregnant, i was so sick for the first few months that i just ate whatever didnt upset my stomach that day. to hell with counting calories, carbs, fiber, protein…and everything else on the label. i gained fifty pounds in those nine months but it didnt matter. i could feel my daughter moving around inside my belly! i had a nursery to plan and books to read, questions to ask, and dreams to dream for her! i happily bought set after set of larger maternity clothes. she was growing! that was really all that mattered.

after she was born my stomach stayed about as big as it was at six months pregnant for quite some time. then it slowly shrunk to four months pregnant, and then down to not pregnant at all! but i really hardly noticed. i was watching my baby grow, not my size shrink. besides, the only time i really left the house in those months was for doctor appointments or the rare grocery shopping trip. at three months, when i was going back to work, i looked at my body. it didnt even remotely resemble the body it had been just a year ago. my hips were wide and soft, everything was soft! my boobs had gone from a 34C to a 38D (or 38DD depending on the brand and style of bra) my stomach sagged with extra skin and was covered with stretchmarks. and i couldnt have been happier with myself. this was the body of me, the mother. these were the effects that my daughter had had. every stretchmark was a sign that she had been there, that she was a part of my life now. i went through my old clothes and donated all the size two tiny little clothes i had to the salvation army and went out and bought a fabulous size ten wardrobe. i’m not selfconscious anymore. i’ve never been more comfortable with my body and my husband still cant keep his hands off me. i hope everyone out there can love themselves the way that i have learned to. and i desperately hope that i can pass it onto my daughter.

10 thoughts on “Never Happier With Myself (Anonymous)

  • Thursday, April 30, 2009 at 12:07 pm

    you made me smile! this was my favorite part, “i went through my old clothes and donated all the size two tiny little clothes i had to the salvation army and went out and bought a fabulous size ten wardrobe.” go girl! in my post titled “working with what i’ve got”, my number one piece of advice is to buy for your size, because too-small clothing is simply not flattering to a robust, goddessy postpartum body like yours & mine. i did the same thing (except for the donation part) & have never felt sexier or more confident.

  • Thursday, April 30, 2009 at 12:55 pm

    I love your attitude!!! I hope your post will help everyone out their who feels down on themselves!

  • Thursday, April 30, 2009 at 1:36 pm

    what a beautiful, refreshing post! this is one of my favourite posts thus far!! you look fabulous and healthy and have an amazing attitude. enjoy your little one!

  • Thursday, April 30, 2009 at 5:46 pm

    :-D !!!!

  • Thursday, April 30, 2009 at 10:17 pm

    Your stomach looks just like mine, and I’m just as happy with my belly now as you are with yours.

    I love your attitude! You go girl!

  • Friday, May 1, 2009 at 3:32 pm

    You so rock! You are totally my hero!

  • Friday, May 1, 2009 at 6:16 pm

    I loved your post, you sound like a great woman to know :) Go mama!

  • Monday, May 4, 2009 at 12:27 pm

    What an inspiration! You have a great outlook. More of us should love ourselves that much! :)

  • Tuesday, May 5, 2009 at 7:19 am

    You have a wonderful body and should be proud!

  • Thursday, May 7, 2009 at 11:46 am

    Your style of writing is awesome. So are your breasts.

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