Finally Learning to Love Me (Anonymous)

I am 20 years old and gave birth to my beautiful daughter on August 9th, 2009. I loved being pregnant but was so afraid of how I would feel about my postpartum body…in the past I have suffered from body image issues and bulimia which I was slowly recovering from when I discovered that I was pregnant. My biggest fear was that I would look and feel worse than ever about myself after the baby and go back to my old harmful ways of binging, purging and abusing laxatives to try to lose weight.

But the most AMAZING thing has happened: by experiencing the astounding process of growing my daughter inside my body, and then giving birth to her and seeing this PERFECT little creature that I made!- I find myself feeling so much respect and awe for my womanly body and all that it is capable of. Something I have never felt before….I feel Beautiful and Strong and I’m (mostly) okay with the fact that I don’t look perfect. I am capable of being gentle with myself for the first time.

Instead of constantly putting myself down and thinking I’m ugly and I should eat less and try harder and I’ll never be good enough, etc., etc……I am surprised now when I find myself thinking “Good job, you’re doing fine. Take it easy.”….

I HATED myself at 115 lbs, thought I was fat and ugly and no one could ever love me, and now at 142 I’ve never felt so beautiful, happy and worthy of love in my whole life. My body that I loathed so much has made my wonderful daughter for me and I will never intentionally hurt it again.

Just wanted to share :)

These pictures are of me 1 month PP.

Updated here.

14 thoughts on “Finally Learning to Love Me (Anonymous)

  • Tuesday, October 6, 2009 at 11:29 am

    You look so GOOD! I can’t believe you’re only one month PP! Especially your breasts are so pretty, God I would kill for mine to look like that! :)

  • Tuesday, October 6, 2009 at 11:34 am

    I love your attitude! You have great curves too!

  • Tuesday, October 6, 2009 at 12:22 pm

    Good on you! I’m so happy for you, and you should feel good you look awesome :)!

  • Tuesday, October 6, 2009 at 12:58 pm

    you look AMAZING for 1 month pp! You have a gorgeous body!!! You breats look awesome!!!
    And good for you for realizing you are just fine the way you are. Your body is beautiful; love it for what it is! :)

  • Tuesday, October 6, 2009 at 5:02 pm

    You are beautiful!!!!

  • Tuesday, October 6, 2009 at 8:22 pm

    Thank you so much for sharing your story. You are a beautiful mother and your story really inspires me:)

  • Tuesday, October 6, 2009 at 8:39 pm

    u look amazing! i have the same body as u.. i was 120 b4 i was preggers and now im 148.. except i am unhappy with my weight.. i want to be back to my old size :( i wish i had ur confidence! Good luck with your little one! Enjoy it while thier little bcuz mine will be 1 next month, and I miss her being a newborn :(

  • Wednesday, October 7, 2009 at 7:38 am

    what a great story! You look fantastic, like a woman should! you’ve got all the right curves, that’s for sure ;) & its even more amazing for being only 1 month PP! I hope you update this post down the road, you are so beautiful!! I’d love to see more…

  • Wednesday, October 7, 2009 at 10:03 pm

    You look fantastic. After breastfeeding for a total of 2 1/2 years with my two sons, my boobs are something of a wreck, and I can honestly say, I am totally jealous – lol – of yours! I do not think mine looked anything like that prior to even the first pregnancy! Congrats on the great outlook!

  • Thursday, October 8, 2009 at 5:57 pm

    Very shapely perfect breasts!!

  • Friday, October 9, 2009 at 11:58 pm

    You should be proud! You have such a hot figure! Wow. Can I trade your body with mine!? And I totally identify with you. I am actually the same weight I was before pregnancy, but I am definitely more CURVY than before pregnancy. I definitely think I’m sexier now. I definitely recognize how amazing my body is and how blessed I am for being able to do these things.

  • Friday, October 16, 2009 at 6:20 pm

    completly totally amazing! my word, you have cause for pride, :)

  • Friday, October 23, 2009 at 6:39 pm

    you have great boobs!

  • Tuesday, February 2, 2010 at 12:15 pm

    Your breasts are phenomenal!

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