Thanks to Sarah, I saw this old poster for the first time ever today. And LOVED it. So I did a quick Google to find more info and found a little blurb here. Enjoy!
Author: Bonnie (SOAM)
Photo of the Week – February 21, 2007
Mikaela
The first time I visited The Shape of a Mother, there were only a few submissions, and I thought, “I have to do this.” It’s taken me several months to *finally* do it, but here I am, thanks to all the amazing moms who’ve already posted :)
Before I really had the chance to even consider whether or not I wanted children, I became pregnant. We were high school sweethearts, together for almost four years and engaged. I was 18, he was 19, and we were living together, far away from home. I don’t remember much about being pregnant, other than *loving* it. I’ve never in my life ever felt so beautiful than I did during those nine months. Even when I was working double shifts and throwing up in a trash can at my desk, I was absolutely joyous over my belly.
Being so young, my body weight and shape went right back to where I started almost immediately. However, the nearly 40 pounds I gained left me with many stretch marks; all over my tummy, on the tops of my thighs and on my breasts. I never had a stretch mark in my life before then and I thought they were just the wildest things.
I’ve always been self-conscience of my body, always very modest, and so these scars didn’t really change the way I dressed or undressed or displayed myself. I hadn’t owned a bathing suit in years, I never wore belly-bearing tops and I never undressed in front of my boyfriend. As much as my modesty has been a burden, I believe it also really helped me adjust to my new appearance. I’d always had a private, intimate relationship with my body – getting to know it with these unusual stretch marks wasn’t difficult.
I do love them. Seeing them, I am reminded of just how clueless I was ten years ago when I got pregnant. What were we thinking?! 2,500 miles away from home, barely making it on our own, living it up every weekend, no car, still kids ourselves… It’s amazing that we were allowed to have a child!
Like most mommas, I now know that I was intended to give birth to my son; I know the world was simply not complete without him. He is an amazing, thoughtful, creative, cuddly, nonstop, tackling, building, drawing, high-energy, high-impact, collection of skateboarding legs, basketball playing arms and long hair. He’s my monster. My number one man, my light, my heart and my soul. And every time I brush a hand across my stomach and feel one of my deep stretch marks, or catch a glimpse of them on my breasts, the edges of them poking out the top of my shirt, or notice them on my thighs when I change at the gym, I am reminded of him, and I feel proud and insanely touched by the fact that I am a mom. A mom – wow!
Now that I’ve had the time and experience to consider parenthood, I know that had I not become pregnant then, I never would have. Sustainability, economics, consumerism, politics and just plain fright play major roles in my decision to *not* have any more children. Thank goodness I was too young and stupid ten years ago to know any better! As difficult as being a very young, and eventually a single mom, has been, I feel like parenthood was the universe’s gift to me – the only way I could become a mother, was to let it happen before I could even think about it. Thank god it did :)
20 Week Belly (Anonymous)
This is a picture taken of my 20 weeks pregnant belly. I have one little girl already who is almost 4 and that’s where the stretchmarks come from. I used to be moderately ashamed of them, but since being pregnant with this child and looking at all the bumps online, I realize that I should not feel shame! I should feel pride that we, as women, have the honor to carry those battle scars! Men (used to ONLY men)go to war and come back with horrific scars and show them to people with pride. While women do not get purple hearts for their heroism, they do get to look at the life they made every day and men only have painful memories….. Wear your marks proudly ladies! We are at war with people who think our bodies are not perfect because of the “flaws” pregnancy puts upon us! I say what thing is there that is more beautiful that the temple of a mother’s body?!
Beauty Scars of a Mother (Anonymous)
I stumbled upon your “myspace” and I was hooked, I think it’s wonderful that mothers all over the world are opening up and showing the truth about what most real women look like.
I had my son at the age of 19 and I was so paranoid about getting stretch marks, of course my worst fear came to pass. I remember the first time I saw my son and I knew that he was worth it all, he was perfect and beautiful!
But I started to go down a destructive path of self hate I couldn’t look at myself naked, it would disgust me, and I would cry. It got so bad that I couldn’t have sex unless the lights were out and I had a shirt on, for over two years after my son was born I couldn’t have an orgasm because the sight of me or even the idea of what I looked like would turn me off. At the time I was also in an emotionally and physiologically abusive marriage, after we got separated and the whole dating world opened to me… well my self destructive pattern got worse. It was easy for me to attract a guy, but I thought that as soon as they saw my tummy they would be disgusted, just like I was.
I heard about some scrubs to remove stretch marks, and I would spend hours in the shower scrubbing till my skin was raw and some times would bleed, but I didn’t care, I hated myself too much to care.
I know this sounds horrible, because I love my son and I don’t resent having him, he is every thing to me, the reason I live, he is what pushes me to be succeed, it’s because of him I had the strength to put myself thru college as a single mom working full time and with out the support of any family. (I’m from Spain and my family lives over there) But what I experienced is the raw truth, and it’s not pretty and no mother should feel the need to self mutilate in order to feel whole again.
I have to say that my son is now 8 years old, and I eventually got over most of those issues. While it still bothers me I have come to realize that there are more important things in life then my tummy! I feel that openly talking about this and taking a picture is good for me, it’s thereputic! I look at my son and see this amazing smart caring child and he is a product of my body and soul and while I don’t flaunt my tummy to the whole world … inside I bear my scars with pride!
The Joy Of Twins (Anonymous)
Before, during (about 34 weeks) and after (about 26 months after) shots of my belly. Ironically, I paid over $30,000 just to GET pregnant! So, I suppose you could say I paid for this look…let’s hope it catches on and becomes a fad!
Anonymous
This is me at 16, about 4 months before I became pregnant with my First child. I had him at 17.I am now 22, and married to the Father of my son,and we have since had two other children. SO I am a wife and a mother of three. ages 5, 3, 18m. And my body has certinly taken its toll.
Women are magic – Photo of the Week, February 12, 2007
Women are magic
Originally uploaded by Tampen.
This photo (or, rather, these photos) are striking. Shows the beauty of a woman’s body both with and without child. I also like it because this site has been accused or never showing the women who do “bounce back”. Which simply isn’t true.
In any case, the submission is beautiful. If you click on the photo, you can read what the photographer has written about it, and it’s pretty darn funny, in my opinion.
Enjoy!
2 Babies in 2 Years (Anonymous)
I found out I was pregnant with my first child in February 2004. I couldn’t wait for my husband to get home that day from work. He told me on the way home that he had news for me too. I told him I was pregnant and he told me that he got laid off. YEAH!!! All was going well until I developed pregnancy induced hypertension (PIH) at 31 weeks with him. I was placed on a restrictive diet and bed rest for the remainder of the pregnancy. It wouldn’t have been so bad but we were on one income. I was induced at 37 1/2 weeks. After an 18 hour labor, a beautiful baby boy was born. However, he had trouble breathing. His lungs were not developed enough due to the complications of my pregnancy so he spent a week in the NICU.
I nursed him until he was 10 months old. I had to reluctantly wean him due to the fact that I found out I was pregnant in August 2005. Wow what a surprise to my husband and I. I was hoping that this pregnancy would go well and I wouldn’t have the problems that I did previously. However I was not so lucky. I developed PIH at 24 weeks literally overnight. I had been feeling great until I woke up one morning feeling terrible. I went to the doctor and he put me in the hospital immediately. I spent the weekend there and then released with meds to control blood pressure and orders to be on “part time” bed rest. I though “Bed rest” with a 14 month old. Yeah right!!! The next 12 weeks included increased medications, daily checks of my blood pressure, reduced hours at work, and a restrictive diet. I tried to make it week to week. I made it to 36 1/2 weeks. I was induced and 11 hours later a gorgeous healthy baby girl was born. She had no problems breathing and was perfect in every way.
My body has been through a lot of ups and downs in the past two years. But I would do it all over again in a hearthbeat. My scars, stretch marks, and saggy skin are a testament to my two beautiful children, who are now 2 and 9 months.
Baby #3, Post #3 (Babs)
The last submissions I put in were about not having any stretch marks, and a c-section recovery but baby #3 came 3 weeks overdue (and by UBAC) and weighed over 9lbs; he left his footprints when I reached about 40weeks and my fundal height crept past 43cm (it went to over 46). He came 11 months after my cesarean/childloss.
These pictures were a few weeks before birth, one during labour (an hour before birth) and one 2 months postpartum.
Updated here.