number of pregnancies and births: 1
postpartum: 5 months
I honestly have no idea where to even begin this post. I was always the “skinny girl” growing up. I got alot comments on my weight, and they were not always postitive ones, but I loved my body and who I was. I started dating my boyfriend when I was 15 years old. We found out I was pregnant when I was 16 and he was 19. Right from the get go I knew I loved my baby. All through out my pregnancy I always got the comment “oh you are going to bounce right back to your old body!”, I have now come to hate that saying. I was 93 pounds when I found out I was pregnant and the day I gave birth I was at 156. I had never been over 100 pounds in my LIFE until I got pregnant. I loved my body through out my pregnancy and loved being pregnant. I felt like a woman and loved all my curves and even liked the stretch marks. They were the proof of a beautiful healthy baby growing inside my belly. As soon as I met my daughter it was love at first sight. I was so amazed at how beautiful she was. Then as a few months went by, I realized my body was not at all what I wanted it to be. Im ashamed when I look in the mirror. My boyfriend tells me Im beautiful and he loves my body more now then he did before. He tells me he loves everysingle mark pregnancy has caused, because without them he wouldnt have his daughter. I don’t feel sexy and hate every part of my body. I get so irritated at him and can’t see what he sees. Is he blind? I dont understand how anyone can look at my body and think it is not disgusting. My daughter is my world and I would not trade her for anything, I just cannot seem to come to terms with myself. And to be honest, I feel selfish when I say I hate my body. My body brought my daughter into this world and I just wish I could love it as much as I love her.
pic1: 2months before i got pregnant
pic 2: 8 months pregnant with my boyfriend at baby shower
pic 3 and 4: 5 months pp
pic 5 and 6: my beautiful baby girl