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Did you know? (Jill)

April 7, 2011

Previous posts here, here and here.

My baby is 20 months old.
My body is 20 months postpartum.
We had a natural birth.
We breastfed for 13 months.
I’m 23.

I didn’t know you could “give it 9 months, 12 months, 18 months, etc” and still not be where you want to be.
I didn’t know people were gonna be so wrong when they assured me “Don’t worry, a first pregnancy doesn’t do any damage.”
I didn’t know my boobs would be so empty, so used up, so covered in scars after this whole ordeal of motherhood began and flourished.
I didn’t know the stretch marks on my thighs would illicit so many comments at the pool.
I didn’t know my hair would fall out, my eyesight would get worse, and my hands would go numb during/soon after pregnancy.
I didn’t know the postpartum stomach I’ve worked so hard on, the one I’m now OK with (mostly) and so proud of would confuse and even disgust the few I chose to show it to.

I didn’t know I could love someone so much I’d pray over them while they slept.
I didn’t know I could get by on so little sleep and still smile.
I didn’t know I’d build such amazing forts that my son would play in them for hours.
I didn’t know a couple of words could make my whole heart melt: “I want mama!”
I didn’t know 20 months later, I’d still be saying, “Don’t get any bigger! This phase is my favorite so far!” and mean it each time.
I didn’t know I could love my husband more but every time I see the resemblance between my little baby and my big baby, watch out! More love.

I don’t know how I’ll ever let that little baby go and grow up on his own when it’s time.

What didn’t you know?
What do you wish you’d known?
What have you learned?
Know this: We are mothers! We are amazing.

Pics: The ever controversial postpartum stomach. Covered in stretch marks. Flapping with extra skin. I know. Get over it.

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23 Responses to “Did you know? (Jill)”

  1. amber h Says:
    April 7th, 2011 at 8:07 am


    You look GREAT woman!! you and i are similar altho i would consider my stretch marks much deeper… you can check my post at blessed and tortured…

    again you look amazing, ive decided to pierce my belly button so that little sag above the belly button isnt as noticable… GL!

  2. Katy Says:
    April 7th, 2011 at 8:53 am

    I think your stomach is ok,you are beautiful,you are a mother! i have too stomach like you so?you are not alone:) kiss;*

  3. Karla Says:
    April 7th, 2011 at 9:09 am

    Love it! just like you…I didnt know that having extra pounds a few months after having a baby was unacceptable but I found out “thanks” to many “friends” that made sure I knew I was “heavy” and not the skinny girl I used to be…It bothered me at first…but now just like you said…Get over it!

  4. Stacy Says:
    April 7th, 2011 at 9:36 am

    Love it! So beautiful! I love rubbing my belly, it is so soft and amazing texture! I am all about making stretch marks from pregnancy (and puberty) a sign not of “genetics” but as a willingness of my spirit to grow and expand. True body art :-)

  5. Audrey Says:
    April 7th, 2011 at 10:26 am

    I have found my stomach twin! :D
    Love this post.

  6. Mary V Says:
    April 7th, 2011 at 10:28 am

    Great posting, and so true!
    I didnt know you should take the term “eating for two,” literally!
    I wish I knew my thyroid had failed me during my first pregnancy.
    I have learned that I am beautiful no matter how my body changes!
    Thank you!

  7. Jenny W Says:
    April 7th, 2011 at 10:38 am

    Girl, noone should be grossed out by you. We have VERY similar stomachs, but I guess it’s just a small price to pay for our babies. Good post

  8. Jamie L Says:
    April 7th, 2011 at 1:08 pm

    Beautiful post! It is so important we, as women, support and accept our mama bodies. There is so much there to show what we’ve been through. You look wonderful!

  9. Christa Says:
    April 7th, 2011 at 2:39 pm

    This post brought tears to my eyes. My son is 22 months and now I have another on the way. Everything said, I have felt in my very soul.
    You are a wonderful writer and I think you have a smokin’ bod! Many women would kill for that whether or not it’s post-baby!

  10. Kira Says:
    April 7th, 2011 at 5:50 pm

    Your post brought tears to my eyes. It was like you were speaking my thoughts in your own words. I think you look great, my tummy was very similar after my first.

  11. anonymous Says:
    April 7th, 2011 at 7:43 pm

    EXTREMELY well written. I agree 100% beautiful post thank you so much for sharing!!!

  12. sarah Says:
    April 8th, 2011 at 5:29 am

    You said it! Get over it! ( your tummy) Your post is beautiful and you look great it’s not worth the obsession.

  13. emily Says:
    April 8th, 2011 at 6:14 am

    this made me cry. in a good way. <3

  14. jessica Says:
    April 8th, 2011 at 10:09 am

    who would make comments about stretch marks on your thighs???? stretch marks are a part of being a woman EVERY woman has some…but i would not comment on someones at the pool, might notice but they are just stretch marks, who cares…if someone says something to you next time give em the finger and tell them to mind their own beezwax!

  15. Miel Says:
    April 9th, 2011 at 3:03 am

    I’ve read so many posts. This is by far the best. Thank you so much for sharing, Jill. <3 I will learn to get over it…We are mothers. We are amazing.

  16. Melissa Says:
    April 9th, 2011 at 9:21 pm

    This was an amazing post! I am 6 months PP of a C-section. My little girl was born 10 lbs 6 oz and stretched my body to the gills.

    I am extremely self conscious about my body and the deep red stretch marks still, the pouchy tummy, the fact that I still have 25 lbs to lose before I touch my pre-preggo weight, but this post made me smile. :)

    It’s good to know that I’m not the only one experiencing this stuff.

  17. Tosha Says:
    April 10th, 2011 at 6:11 am

    <3 this! Brought tears to my eyes!

  18. shannon Says:
    April 10th, 2011 at 2:50 pm

    I didn’t know that I could get stretchmarks in so many places.
    I din’t know I would be 2 years pp after #2 and still have 10 pounds to lose!
    I didn’t know that I could love someone so much.
    I didn’t know how much I would grow up.
    I didn’t know that I could suffer the loss of a child (my 1st passed away at 19 months) and still go on.
    I didn’t know that a baby could be my hero.
    I wish I knew that my son would pass so young, I would have done so much more with him.
    I wish I knew how to love my body!
    I learned that you really do love all of your children the same :)
    I learned that there are more things to worry about in life besides some loose skin.
    I learned that your kids are ALL that matter :)

    Great post, and you look so lovely.

  19. bethany actually Says:
    April 12th, 2011 at 10:13 pm

    “Get over it.” I love it! You rock. :-)

    When I was pregnant with my second daughter, born 11/2010, a friend saw the new, bright red stretch marks on my stomach and commented that she was sorry I’d gotten new stretch marks. I know her comment was meant well, so I didn’t take offense at it, but I was genuinely puzzled that she felt she should offer sympathy for them. Why would they bother me? They’re just part of having babies!

  20. Ashley Says:
    April 15th, 2011 at 12:41 pm

    Great post! This made me cry. I’m an trying to adjust to my post-pregnancy body and your story is inspiring. Thank you.

  21. Kayla Says:
    April 24th, 2011 at 6:05 pm

    Wow this made me cry. I just had a baby 3 weeks ago and found this site. You look great! I hope I end up looking that good : I gained 50 lbs in my pregnancy, lost 35 so far, and not liking what I see. But my little baby girl was/is worth it :)

  22. Sergeant Mom Says:
    April 28th, 2011 at 3:54 pm

    WOW…. you are awesome and this is so well written! This is amazing and what I am gonna show all my other mom friends! Encompasses everything about being a mom!

  23. Erin Says:
    May 9th, 2011 at 1:07 pm

    I am 40weeks pregnant right now and if my tummy ends up looking like yours after this I’ll be so happy! I really don’t understand who would say your tummy is gross. I’m not commenting just to be nice either. Your tummy looks hot and it’s toned :-) I think the thin faint marks are cute too.


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