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The Struggle to Feel Great (Anonymous)

At 6 weeks post pardom, I’m finding it a daily struggle to love who I am on the outside as much as I love who I am on the inside. As a teen mom, I would love to do what everyone was convinced I would do- “Bounce Back”. I don’t think thats anywhere in my future. Prepregnancy- 118 lbs, size 1/3 11 weeks- 140 lbs, size 5 I delivered my son epi-free at 176 lbs. He was a beautiful 8 lbs 13 oz, and is thriving on breast milk. He is currently 12 lbs 4 oz. I am stuck at 140 lbs, and a size 11. I feel as though my body will never be the same and I just want to feel great. My fiance says he loves my body and my curves, but its so hard to believe him, when all I see are the stretch marks and rolls.






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19 comments… add one
  • Regina Thursday, January 17, 2008, 7:52 am

    i think you look amazing!!! at only a few weeks post partum!!!!!! too look as good as you do takes a lot of women months and years to achieve.

  • Jen Thursday, January 17, 2008, 7:53 am

    Hey there, dont’ be so hard on yourself, it’s been only 6 weeks. just concentrate of your baby, the weight will come off, but it is going to take time. I was 125lbs before pregnancy. The day i went into labor i was 188lbs! My baby is now 11 months old and I weigt 120lbs! And i didn’t do anything special to lose the weight, i just ate right. So don’t worry, you’ll get rid of the extra pounds in time. Also, I had stretchmarks too, but now they are a silvery color. They will fade, and in a few months you will start to feel like yourself again. Just try not to obsess over it, your baby is the most important thing right now. Once your baby is a year old, you will look back and think the time went too fast, and you’ll wish you spent more time enjoying your baby than worrying about your weight. Good luck..and by the way, that is the cutest pregnancy pic ever! you’re a beauty!!

  • Julia Thursday, January 17, 2008, 8:36 am

    I swear to god, it will get better. I know it doesn’t seem like it, but I’ve been exactly where you are.

    Just give your body a chance to heal, and it may surprise you.

  • Bex Thursday, January 17, 2008, 9:01 am

    I had stretch marks just like yours 9probably worse!) and now after 6 months they are starting to fade! I still have a tummy that looks way worse than yours!! So really, you look great! And i think it is so great that you are breastfeeding, i was not able, i had premature twins and i would have loved to see myself nourish them and make them grow! Enjoy your baby and be assured that you are very beautiful!

  • Katherine Thursday, January 17, 2008, 10:03 am

    Don’t worry – 6 weeks out is nothin’! At 6 months, you’ll be within 5-10 lbs of your pre-preg. weight, and the breastfeeding will help that happen without lots of extra effort. As kiddo gets bigger, you’ll just keep making more milk, and the weight you have now will help you do that. Love that body – it’s what’s feeding your baby!

  • Samantha Thursday, January 17, 2008, 11:32 am

    Hey there pretty lady! I was just reading your post and looking at your pics, you look really great for only six weeks! My belly is quite similar to yours, I’m 22, 5’8 and went from 145 lbs to 217 lbs (thanks to the mcDonald’s milkshake diet.), and my son is 15 months old now, when he was born he weighed 8 lbs 11ounces.(kudos for no epi!) I wish my stretch marks looked like yours! Mine went about 2 inches above my belly button, almost all the way around to my back and a few little ones waaayyy up on my sides, only a few inches away from my armpits :(

    I can promise you that the stretch marks will fade ALOT, and the weight will melt off (especially if you are still breast feeding!)
    I know what you are going through, and I know it’s so hard to get used to, and how hard it is to believe people when they say you look beautiful, but YOU TRULY ARE and it will get a little better everyday!

  • avery Thursday, January 17, 2008, 11:55 am

    If it makes you feel any better, you are at my goal weight!

  • Sarah Thursday, January 17, 2008, 12:10 pm

    First of all, you are awesome for the epi-free birth and for breastfeeding your child! I’ve done those things, too. My daughter is 14 months and it has been an awesome year. :) I am always impressed with teens who do these things. I am impressed wit you! :D

    About “bouncing back” hardly ANYONE does that. And you look gorgeous. NO your body will not be what it once was. You were a girl before and now you are a woman and a mother. That makes changes in your body. You’ll never get that back. And for what price? A beautiful son!!! It is all worth it. Love your body. It has done things that some women will NEVER get to do: birth a child and then nourish that child on breastmilk! What a blessing!!!

    And you look gorgeous! The stretchmarks fade, they do. Then you are only a few weeks postpartum. It takes a year or more for most women to get to a size where they are comfortable again. You are well on your way and you’re looking beautiful!

  • Mom of One Thursday, January 17, 2008, 12:54 pm

    I am a mom of one, and I can relate to your struggles…however, now that my daughter is four years old, I’ve learn to love my body. First off, your stretch marks WILL fade dramatically over time. My girlfriend had more than you after her first child and now you can barely even see them. Second, at 6 weeks post partum, you look incredible and your body will continue to go through so many changes over the next few months. As a 29 year old woman, I have spent FAR too many years obsessing over my body. I can now finally say that I accept my body. It created a little girl that I adore and although it’s changed, I feel more womanly now. I have a bum…curves…etc, and they are sexy. You may never be what you once were, but so what? You’re a mom now and you’re beautiful. When your baby grows and says to you “mommy, your beautiful”, it will melt your heart, and you’ll start to FEEL it. So try your best to put your body aside and concentrate on the positives (easier said than done…I know), but coming from a fellow mom I regret all those years I obsessed and couldn’t just let myself relax. Eat healthy, go for walks, and you’ll do just fine. :o) And those long walks will give you some great bonding time with your child and will make you feel better about yourself…nothing beats fresh air!

  • Mandi Thursday, January 17, 2008, 1:33 pm

    You have to take it easy on yourself sweetie. You are less than 2 months out from giving birth!!!! It takes a woman, on average, one year to recover physically from giving birth. Your body is still working on getting everything back into the place it once was. It going to take time. You will eventually lose the weight (how much will depend on how much you work on it) and I promise (!!!) the stretch marks will fade. They will eventually become flesh-colored and you won’t notice them so much.

    You will ‘bounce back’ but you need to give yourself a little more time. Just try to concentrate on eating well, getting a little exercise if possible and loving on that beautiful little baby boy you have there. The rest will come with time.

    I have to agree with Jen, you are so cute!! :o)

  • Annie Thursday, January 17, 2008, 4:40 pm

    I think you look great! And I love that milk-stained bra! How familiar!

  • Sophia Thursday, January 17, 2008, 5:43 pm

    You are looking great. Trust me, as a young mom myself, it only gets better! Breastfeeding will really help too.
    I was 127, then gave birth at 185, now (3 months pp) I am 138..so only 11 lbs to go! My marks look just like yours.
    I thought they would never fade and I wouldn’t lose the weight, but it just takes time.
    You look great. It will get better.
    Things did slow down regarding weight loss, but now it is a steady decline.
    Love your pregnant photo!

  • Nikki Thursday, January 17, 2008, 7:01 pm

    You look LOVELY! And your little babe is obviously doing really well.

    I always tell people that losing weight due to breastfeeding is rubbish – it’s when your kiddo is a toddler and all you eat is their leftovers, now THAT’s when the weight falls off ;)

    And like others have said, the stretch marks fade. And then scarily enough, if you are anything like me, you stop dressing like a teen and start wearing stuff that looks nicer (and accordingly covers more!) than you used to – and have no regrets.

    Bottom line is, you are beautiful. And your little one will love you no matter what you look like!

  • Dawn Thursday, January 17, 2008, 11:00 pm

    You are gorgeous, give yourself sometime to get back to your pre-pregnancy weight. It sometimes takes a little longer than women expect. And listen to your fiance, most men like the extra “mommy curves”. Enjoy your baby, you are blessed!

  • Heather Friday, January 18, 2008, 12:46 pm

    Oh, honey, you are so beautiful! I’m 6 months pregnant now, and I visit this site every day, because I know the body I will have after my little boy arrives won’t be the same as it was before pregnancy, so I prepare myself….As women, we do such amazing things, and the changes in our body should be badges of honor! Cheers to you for breastfeeding, not only is it so much healthier for the baby, you’ll find that it will make your own body “heal” faster! So often we are too hard on ourselves, and when our dear men tell us they love our curves, they genuinely mean it, we just have to learn to accept it! Give yourself some time, and some love, because you are an AMAZING woman, who has, and is still, performing the miracles of growing, birthing and nourishing a child…Best wishes to you and your family!

  • katrina Friday, January 18, 2008, 1:11 pm

    i was 104lbs efore the baby, and put on over 3.5 stones.baby was 8lb4.5oz and i expexted to loose alot of the weight just from birth, then i got on the scales…
    somehow i hadn’t lost anymore than what the baby weighed, which didn’t make sense as there is all the fluid, placenta blood etc….grrr, anyway,i am still bf my 18mth old, and got skinny again obver time without trying, but i think it is very rare to “bounce back” as they say, as it takes time for stretched skin and muscles to shrink back,etc.
    and didn’t think i had any stretch marks until after he was born, and then i cried!
    what was once a flat stomach was huge and covered in what looked like two huge purple angels wings on either side of my belly button!
    and they were sooo deep.!
    everytime i saw them i burst into tears.
    in desperation i went on the internet looking for a cure,knowing i would just get ripped off, but one product i saw offered a 60day money back guarantee and said that if you are to see results from using it, you will see them within 4 weeks or it probably won’t work for you, so i thought i would go ahead and get some.
    i had to use it 3 times a day, and after about a week i noticed they were fading….it never promises that you can remove them completely, because you can’t ,but they faded to silver in a matter of weeks and the deep grooves filled out, and now they are barely noticable except when you see the light hit them from the sides…the thing i was most impressed with was how the texture of them changed so vastly, and how the colour faded so fast, rather than taking ages.it was my one little indulgence when i was pregnant, and this time i am using it throughout my pregnancy too…if you’d like to try it it was called TRILASTIN SR .i bought 4 tubes but only used one and a half beofre i was satisfied with the resuls, although the area i had to apply it to was just my tummy.yiu can google it to find the website and it was from america…
    i have come to realise though, that the human body is not a static thing, but a constantly changing thing,and so amazing how it can heal itself…
    you look great….and i thought you looked so pretty when pregnant too!!!
    good on you for breastfeeding too! not only are you doing wonders for your growing child, but also helping to protect you from numerous types of cancer,and other diseases as well, so you get rewarded for all your dedication too…
    thanks for posting your pics..

  • Karen Friday, January 18, 2008, 7:37 pm

    Okay… my body looks exactly like yours and my baby just turned one today! Lucky lucky girl!

  • Bee Wednesday, January 23, 2008, 8:09 am

    my stretch marks are very similar to yours (https://theshapeofamother.com/2007/11/my-new-body-anonymous.php), I know just how you feel, somedays I accept my body other days I am very hard on myself…I can tell my stretch marks are starting to fade I am 5 months PP, and I am losing the weight, you will too, just be patient, before pregnancy I was 110lbs, when i gave birth I was 152, I am now 129, my goal is 115lb, so there is light at the end of the tunnel, just focus on your baby, the time goes by too fast. you look great!

  • Ti Saturday, February 2, 2008, 1:52 am

    all though its a long time to think of a year to wait. the stretch marks never go away but the lighten so much!! trust me the red will go. just remember it took nine months to make them so it will take at least that long to lose the weight and have them fade!! AND YOUR FIANCE IS RIGHT YOU LOOK BEAUTIFUL!!

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