My Story (Amber)

I am Amber. I just turned 24 years old. I have been pregnant, and given birth three times. I had a midwife with all three pregnancies. I Now have three little boys. Gabriel, Isaac and Levi -ages (a few days away from) 5, 3 1/2 and just turned 2. That makes me 25 months PP. The first two were natural home births, but Levi, I delivered in a hospital because my water broke before I was in labor. They induced labor and I delivered him naturally. He was two weeks early and weighed 7 lbs even. Gabriel, my oldest was born a day before his due date and weighed 8 lbs 7oz. Isaac was two days before his due date and weighed 8lbs 4oz.

I am married to a wonderful man. He is a true blessing to me! I met him through family connections when I was nearly 18. (He was 24) We got married only 6 weeks after we met, one month before my 18th birthday. I got pregnant about 5 months later. My first child was born shortly after my 19th birthday. The second, 14 months later. 22 months after my second, came my third. Yes I am busy.

My family wasn’t planned. Really more a result of non-planning. I wasn’t against having children. I always knew I would be a mother. But I was rather passive about the whole thing and honestly, was in a mindset of “letting God decide” what He wanted my family to look like. That seems ridiculous to me now. I am on birth control now. -I have no regrets. Please don’t hear me saying that! God made me fertile. He is not going to be sitting there blocking my husbands semen because we can’t afford another kid and I am overwhelmed. If I have unprotected sex with my husband I AM deciding to have another baby… Not God! I am so grateful for my husband and I, blindly stepping into marriage, and foolishly reproducing because I love my family dearly. Although it was just that: blind and foolish, God was looking out for us, while we were making the decisions. I can’t blame God that it is hard. I don’t really know what I am doing in a lot of ways, but I do trust Him. And I trust that God can use all things together for good for those who love him. I am incalculably blessed with supportive family and friends, a loving husband who is a loving father to our children, Healthy children, and so much more. I wouldn’t trade it, BUT I wouldn’t exactly recommend following my example, either.

I had amazing “easy” pregnancies. I don’t like to talk about it much because of the hate filled glares I receive when I mention things like, “no morning sickness” or “30 lb weight gain during pregnancy with 20 of that gone after childbirth” or “4 hour labor, with 3 pushes” but I am grateful! Don’t worry, I pay for it now with three wild toddlers. And I guess I’m okay with the stretch marks. Of course, I was hoping I’d be in the 50 percent who didn’t get them. (My mother had 5 and doesn’t have a single mark.) But, its really not the most important thing in the world to have a smooth, youthful, tight stomach. My husband still thinks I’m hot.

I’m sexier now as a mom of two! (Ana Nelson)

my names Ana I’m 21 years old. At 16 I had my first daughter and being that I was so young all my “friends” did not have stretch marks, had perky breasts and did not have well undereye circles. So I felt ugly. I remember before my 1st pregnancy I was 135 pounds. At 5’3″. After I was 195! I could not belive the monster I had become. Strechmarks and flabby here and there and nasty boobs. I didn’t even know how my husband even tried for another. My self-esteem was to the grounds! I was so ashamed. But we decided to have another baby. Me, being selfish didn’t want to cuz I didn’t want to get anymore disgusting. But at the age of 19 my husband and I had our second baby. Before that pregnancy I stayed at 160 and got up to 189. Same thing all over again. EXCEPT one day I remember talking to a girl she was 23 and she was complaining about the SAME things I had. Except I didn’t want to be 23 and still complain. Just hearing her made me mad. To me she was saying she was ashamed at her daughter! And that’s when I caught myself! “wow, all this time that’s what I sounded like?” my first daughter is 3 my second turns 1 and I decided to stop being a cry baby and love every single mark I had! I started working out, changed my eating habit and with the 2 years I breastfed the girls it started shedding. 7 months later. I’m 121 pounds, I might not have a model body but I tell you what? My body NOW is stronger, better looking, than before I had my first daughter! I love my kids and for them I made a change in my health. My mommy body surprises me over and over again! I AM SEXIER NOW AS A MOTHER OF 2! :)

~Age: 21
~Number of pregnancies and births: 3 pregnancies, 2 births
~The age of your children, or how far postpartum you are: #1 is 3 #2 is 1

Update (Amber)

Previous post here.

My third child is now 18 months old and is finally weaned and my breasts have shrunk down to their new size from here on out. Before my pregnancies, my weight was 155 lbs, after my 2nd child weaned my weight was 135 lbs, after the 3rd child weaned, my weight is now 137 lbs. My current BMI is 20, due to the lack of fat my body has left after breastfeeding all 3 of our children (1st: 13mos, 2nd: 15 mos, 3rd: 16 mos). I never tried to lose weight, I just ate healthy, exercised lightly, and took care of my babies naturally.

If you are lose all of your baby weight like I did (and then some), your body takes on another shape – mainly there is extra skin that no longer has fat to fill it and the skin has lost it’s elasticity to snap back into shape. I was wondering if I should get breast implants to fill the skin back out, but after learning that most implants cause major scar tissue and have to be replaced at least every 10 years for the rest of your life – I decided against a boob job. Afterall, the more I looked, the more I saw that this is NORMAL – this is what mothers look like!! Their breasts are saggy, flattened, there is extra skin and you know what – that is just fine because it is a type of beauty that can only be gained from having done an excellent job creating life, selflessly giving of yourself, and I am damn proud of it! I hope my photos will empower you to appreciate your body, however nature has made it, and not feel like you need to conform to the “standard of beauty” that is commercialized.

My Body After Twins (Anonymous)

Everyone told me when I was pregnant that I would never be able to wear a bikini again because being pregnant with twins destroys your stomach. I want to tell you that that is not always the case. People
also said that if your mom has stretch marks you will too. My Mom has stretch marks, but I didn’t get any. I ate well and a lot during my pregnancy and have not had time to step into a gym since they were born. I was back to my pre-pregnancy shape two weeks after giving birth naturally. I eat whatever and however much I want, nurse and take care of my awesome twin boys. I feel very fortunate and love being a Mom!

~Age: 26
~Number of pregnancies and births: One pregnancy, twins
~The age of your children, or how far postpartum you are: In the picture I am 6 months
postpartum with fraternal twin boys.

Really trying to be positive about my body. (Mia)

Im 5ft 7 and have always been a very slim girls to the point where other girls were unkind at school with regards to my weight. My pre-pregnancy weight was under 8 stone.

I fell in love at 17 and we moved in together, got engaged at 18 at was married at 19. Shortly to follow was my first pregnancy. We planned for it and fell lucky after 3 months of ‘trying’. At my 20 week scan we discovered i was having a boy and we were so thrilled and happy. We chose his name then and and i had a normal healthy pregnancy. A week and a half past my due date i went into a very slow labour which took about four days off and on!! looking back i suppose thats pretty normal as my body had never done this before but at the time and being so young i was a little over whelmed. After 2 long hours of pushing i gave birth to a perfectly healthy baby boy at a bouncy 9lbs!!

He was perfect and i breast fed with alot of support from my husband and my mum. My tummy after giving birth was stretched and the belly button area looked strange. Weight wise i got back to pre- pregnancy and after i stopped breastfeeding at 5 months my breasts and nipples looked great, pretty much pre pregnancy, but my stomach really bothered me.

When our son was 6 months old he died of sudden infant death sydrome. It felt like the end of my world, our life and like my heart and soul were irreparably damaged to lose him.

3 weeks after his funeral i found out that i was pregnant. We had conceived days before he had died. We felt this to be a gift from our son to keep us going, and it did.

The following year our daughter was born; a normal pregnancy and birth . . . but a whopping 10 lbs 6. We were so happy to have her but were terrified of losing her, to the point where i almost felt like i was living with the responsibility of keeping her breathing. Having said that we enjoyed her and shes now 5, the most beautiful spirited little girl. But in those early months still grieving for my son and having my daughter i think somewhere a long the line i became a little obsessed with my tummy. It had obviously changed not just from pre – babies but since after having my daughter. Since she was so large and my frame is small the skin on my tummy stretched irreparably leaving me with something i felt that i could not live with. So i threw myself into exercise and rubbing creams in 3-4 times a day. After a few months of this my husband became concerned about me and suggested i talk to the eticGP about my tummy. I did an the GP was unhelpful at best; at worst incredibly un-sympathetc to my situation. So i went to see a plastic surgeon and ended up having a partial tummy tuck. My muscle werent touched but the excess skin was taken away. This left me with a big abdominal scar and false belly button but i felt happy with the results. It says something for my state of mind, because i didnt think beyound that day and getting that skin off my tummy. Did i sit and think ‘am i going to have more children?…No.

A year later and we were broody. When our daughter was 2 and half I gave birth to another little boy. He weighed in at 8 lbs 10. He was another beautiful incredible gift. I breastfed again, this time for 13 months and the month i stopped feeding . . . . i conceived our latest and final addition (my husband has had that special appointment earlier this year at the doctors…)

My tummy did not have the loose skin but my scar was very prominant after having been stretched and my breasts were a huge disapointment. After stopping feeding there were a few months between the feeding hormones going and pregnancy hormones filling them back up. They were not pretty.

We were excited, but nervous how we would cope with 3 so close in age. I was also scared. How would my body be after having four babies? How would my breasts look after another breastfeeding stint?
9 months later and we had a another little boy, or not so little at 9lbs 10!! Again perfect and he has completed our family. I stopped feeding when he was 6 months old. He is one next week. i am 27.

How is my body? Well i have been running and exercising for the past 6 months. Rubbing cream into my tummy, scar and breasts like a derranged woman and eating very healthy foods, in hope against hope that i can maybe feel, dare i say it sexy again. But the truth is that even after all i have been through losing my son, and being sent 3 amazing children i am not happy with my body anymore. I am trying to come to terms with it, and all of its changes but the ways in which its changed I have really struggled with. I find it hard to be intimate with my husband and i have really bad days where i feel so ugly.

Here is my moaning list;

I am covered in silver stretch marks, skin hangs funny on my tummy when i lean forward, my belly button resembles a bum hole! My nipples are 5 times the size they used to be and are showing no signs of getting smaller 6 months after weaning and my breast are stretched mark covered deflated saggy sacks. My weight is just over 8 stone.

I have looked on this site for years and finally thought i will make a post. I am slowly learning to love my new body, because at the end of the day it doesnt really matter as long as i am healthy and have the people i love around me, there isnt much more i need x it just sometimes still gets to me :(

Three Boys (Ashley)

I’m a 26 yr old mother too soon to be three boys. I weighted 96lbs before I got pregnant at 19 and I’m 4’11. I gained 55lbs with my first son Corbyn who is 6 now and he weighted 7lbs 9 oz and was 20 3/4 in long. After him it took a year but I lost down to 92lbs I didn’t work out it just came off from working and from stress and yes I had skin hanging and stretch marks that stayed from the middle of my calf’s to the top of my breasts and yes everywhere in between there even to my crotch. I had my second son Jake at 24 who now is 2 I weighted 102lbs when I got pregnant with him and gained 44lbs with him he weighted 6lbs 11oz and was 21 3/4 in long. I only lost 20 pounds from his pregnancy and everything was still left from the first pregnancy meaning stretch marks and skin. They both were vaginal deliveries and I have noticed the damage it has made too my body but you know what I wouldn’t change any of it and really the only thing that bothers me every now and again is the extra skin only because its hard to find jeans. I love my boys and its all worth it even the sagging breast :) I’m now 34 weeks pregnant with my third boy and I have gained 20lbs so far due to GD I probably would have gained more but I’m on the GD diet and don’t want to take insulin so I’m sticking too it :) Ladies there is no shame in the way our bodies look we are mothers and that is a beautiful gift some women would give anything to look like us just to have the beautiful baby that comes with it remember that !!!

Defeat and Angels (Anonymous)

Age: 22
Pregnancies/Births: 1/1
Age of child/how far pp: 3 months

I was 21 when I found out I was pregnant, and though it was not planned we could not have been happier. I had always wanted a baby, and now I was going to be a mother! The pregnancy was very easy and I went on to deliver a healthy baby girl at 37 weeks. Though I never had any medical or health problems during my pregnancy I did have self esteem problems. I always had what I considered the perfect body before pregnancy. I was 5’6″ and 115lbs. I was lean and toned, with curvy hips and perfectly round perky breasts. I had 36 inch hips and a 20 inch waist. I loved being able to throw a bikini on and turn heads with no effort. I never had to work for my body, it just was, and I loved it.

Little by little during my pregnancy the weight added up. 5 lbs this month. 7 the next. Until at 37 weeks I topped out at a weight gain of 53 lbs. Every pound was like a punch in the stomach. I hated it. I was watching my figure vanish under the perfect little person that I loved so dearly. I went 36 weeks without a single stretch mark. That was what kept me hopeful the entire time. I knew that if I could avoid stetch marks, then there was a chance I would someday feel pretty again. Then suddenly, almost overnight, they were there. All over my lower stomach. My sides, my thighs and on the back of my knees. I cried harder than I have ever cried before when I saw those horrible streaks across my skin. I delivered one week later.

I am currently 3 months postpartum and having a very hard time accepting my new body. Everything is different. My bone structure has changed, my hips and rib cage are inches wider, my stomach is flabby and not smooth, my skin is textured and uneven. My breasts, which I now hate, went from a B cup to a DD and now sag. I have cried every time I have taken a shower since the day she was born. I cannot look in the mirror when I am naked. Even though my husband will tell me every day that I am beautiful and perfect, I will not let him touch my stomach because I don’t want him to feel my skin. He used to joke that I was his trophy wife, and he wanted to take me every where he could and show me off. I feel like I ruined those dreams for him. I am no longer the trophy wife he married, but I am the woman with the stretch marks who should never be seen in a bathing suit ever again.

I weigh 125 lbs now, only 10 lbs more than before I got pregnant. I have breast fed my baby since the day she was born, and I believe that helped some, but I can not seem to lose the other 10lbs, and I fear that even if I do I will still never fit my old cloths, I will never have smooth soft skin ever again, and I will never be as little as I was. I fear that even though I love my baby and my husband more than life itself, that I will never be able to love my body. I will never have self confidence. I will never feel beautiful or pretty, and sexy is a word that will never be uttered in my direction. Maybe I sound vain and petty? Maybe I do. But these feelings that I live with every day, they do not feel so petty to me. When society has been screaming at you since you were 5 that you must look this way to be beautiful, and the mirror is screaming at you that you will never even be close, it does not feel petty. It feels like defeat.

Even though I feel this way about my body, I am determined to hide it from my daughter. I want to teach her that she does not have to look like the girls in magazines and on the t.v. That she is perfect just as she is. I know this is going to be hard to do when I can not even tell myself that, but I am determined. Afterall, the only thing that keeps me going is the enormous amount of love that I have for my daughter and my husband. I do not think I would be here today without them. They are my world. They are my angels. I live to see the smiles on their faces, and even though I look at myself and feel like I am all used up, I would not change anything, because doing so would mean that I would not have my little family. My little world.

The first two pictures are from before pregnancy, and then three are of the stretch marks and the extra weight at 3 months pp, and the last one is me at 36 weeks.

My Story (Anonymous)

Pregnancies : 1
Age:19.

I had a beautiful baby girl almost three months ago and I am so happy with my life besides one thing…my body. P re-pregnancy I weighed 130 pounds but it looked more like 120 and I am 5’3 I had very toned abs smaller hips and a 34 C bra size. I gained 30 pounds during my pregnancy so that put me at 160 and I was perfectly fine with that. My baby weighed 8lbs 4.4 oz so I was glad that she was healthy. When I said I was perfectly fine with that I mean that I felt good about it except for when it came to my husband. He hardly looked at me once my belly started getting big and if he did look at me it was only at my chest. After my baby I lost all of the weight I gained within 2 weeks and I think that was because of breast feeding. So, I am back down to actually 128 pounds and left with a bra size of in between a D and a DD and stretchmarks on my belly, boobs, butt, and upper thighs. I am so dissatisfied with my stretchmarks and I think it is because my husband doesn’t look at me the same…or is it all in my head? My hips also got wider throughout my pregnancy and haven’t gone down any. I know that some women say stretchmarks are your mommy badge but that’s not the way I feel which is weird because when I see other women with them I think nothing of it. I just hope that I can someday love my body again. Even if I don’t my daughter will always be worth it no matter what.

Tanner’s Mommy (Chelsi)

Age- 20
Number of pregnancies and births- 1
Age of of your children- 2years

I was 17 when I found out I was pregnant. I was so terrified, I didnt know what to do. My boyfriend, tanners dad… Was there for me threw everything and still is. When i was 3 months pregnant I told my mom, my parents didn’t take it well. Which was expected. Within the next week I went to my doctor to make sure everything was alright and have a ultrasound. It was me, my boyfriend, and my mom in the room. At first everything looked fine. Just an adorable lil baby. Then the ultrasound tech decided to take one last look… She stopped, started to look at the screen very closely. I immediately knew something was wrong. She told me that she was going to send me to another hospital that could see my baby clearer, because she saw something on his stomach… But she couldn’t see exactly what it was. The next week we had another appointment at the specialist. That week waiting for our appointment to come, was the longest week of my life. I had no idea what could be wrong with my baby. Waiting for my name to be called in the waiting room was the hardest thing… I was so nervous. My boyfriend couldn’t make it because of work. Even though my mom was there, I felt so alone. They took me back into the ultrasound room. When she started, the first thing I looked at was his heart, i saw it beating and was imeadiatly relieved. When the ultrasound was over, the waiting began again. My doctor finally came into the exam room, she was holding a whole bunch of pamphlets, a notebook and a pen. She sat down and said. Your baby has something called Gastroschisis The word was so big.. It was so scary hearing it. I had no idea what that ment. She started drawing on her notebook…. She said Gastroschisis is when a baby is born with the intestines on the outside. It happened because the hole in his abdomen didn’t close all the way. So the intestines come out the hole cause there is room for them to do so. I was speachless. I’ve heard about this on the discovery channel.. I never thought this would happen to me, or my baby. She told me that everything will be alright and that there are doctors in that very hospital that could help him when he was born. I couldn’t figure out why this happened, was it something i did? Was it something i didn’t do? I took my prenatal vitamines like i was sopost to. The doctor told me that they dont know why this happenes, i could have been cause i was so young. Over the next couple weeks till our next appointment all i did was research. Even though Everything that i read was very positive. I was still scared out of my mind. Over the next few months we met with NICU nurses and surgeons. They all told me the same thing.. He was going to be okay. When he was born they would take him and place his lower half in a bag to keep out all the bacteria. Then he would be taken into surgery. They couldn’t know how much of his intestines were out till he was born, so we could only hope that it wasn’t very much. Because if there wasn’t a lot they could do everything they needed to in one surgery and then then let him recover. But if there was a lot out, they would have to put something called a silo around the intestines, so that in time(a few days to a few weeks) the intestines would retract back into his body. I just wanted to do whatever was best for my baby, whatever would make him better so he could have a normal life. We got everything set up, ready for his arrival. My doctor thought it would be best if I was induced, so that we could control when he came so that we could make sure the surgeon and all the nurses would be there. On October 25th, me and my boyfriend left the house at 11:00 on our way to the hospital. The whole car ride there, I didn’t actually believe we were going to have our baby that night. I was strangely calm. We got to the Check in desk, they told me that my doctor actually put me down for midnight the next day. Which was strange, it’s like I knew that was going to happen. They told me to come back at 7:00 am. We then once again started our way back to the hospital. This time was a different story, I knew today was the day that my life would change for ever. I was so scared for my baby. All I wanted to do was keep him with me where I knew he was safe. I got induced shortly after 8:00 am. I was 39 weeks and 5 days. They placed a half of a pill ‘down there’ that was sopost to start contractions… That didn’t work so they placed the other half. Still nothing. They decided to place a vaginal balloon to stretch me so that hopefully that would start contractions. Contractions slowly started to happen, but more that anything I just wanted to sleep, since I didnt get very much sleep the night before, I was very tired. Things started to pick up, I couldnt sleep. They gave me a shot in my hip to help me sleep. Which helped for a minute then i ended up puking my guts out. Since I couldn’t sleep we watched Knocked Up (probably wasn’t the best to watch right before giving birth). Right after the movie ended things started to go really fast. I ended up getting a epidural. A little while later my doctor came in a checked me. I was at 10 centemeters. They took me back into the surgery room, so that i could deliver. 42 minutes later I gave birth to a beautiful 7 pound, 19in baby boy. They held him up to show me then he was taken away. I got to see him an hour after he was born in the NICU. My boyfriend wheeled me in once in saw his bed I immediately broke into tears. When in saw him for the first time, my jaw dropped. He was so beautiful, so perfect. He had a full head of black hair. He had his dad’s nose. They had him sedated. We only had a short time with him before he had to be taken back to surgery. When we left I gave him a kiss on his forehead and told him that his mommy loved him very much, everything was going to be okay. I would be there when he woke up. We were taken back to the recovery part of the labory and delivery. We sat in our room waiting for the call that he was out of surgery and was perfectly fine. About an hour later we got the call. We rushed down to be by his side. He was still the most perfect little boy ever. They were able to do what they needed to in one surgery. Now for the first time in 5 months i could breathe. Even though i knew there were still hard days ahead of us. I knew the hardest part was over, the next couple of days were very important. They told me he would spend at minimum a month in the NICU. Next We needed to see if he could absorb the liquid food he was getting threw this IV and that he could poop. After a couple days of waiting, i changed his diaper, when I saw his lil poop, I jumped up and down and said u did it baby, u did it! Since we knew his intestines weren’t damaged from being out so long in the whomb. We had to wait for him to start eating breast milk, finally the time came to actually feed him. That was the first time we were able to be alone. Just me and him. Even though we were still in the hospital. I forgot about all that, it was just be and my baby boy. He quickly started eating more and more. I put everything on hold to be there with my baby over the month he was in the hospital and after he came home. I didn’t want him to be alone for one second. I spend everyday and night that he was in the NICU, right there by his side. We made it to his 1 year appointment! They said that his inside incision was comepletely closed and that he was as perfect as perfect could be. They told me I had nothing to worry about anymore, I still found myself checking his belly bottom to just to make sure. Over the next year he grew, and grew. He met all his milestones. Since then, I’ve graduated high school (on time) , now making plans for college, we even got our own place. Were doing really good. Its almost his second birthday and he’s still perfect! He’s sooo big and smart, he’s the smartest lil boy in the world and he’s all mine! Everyday I thank god for helping my baby threw the hard times. I’m the luckiest mommy in the world! Thank you for taking time to read my story! It means a lot!

First picture- The day Tanner was born.
Second picture- His first day home.
Third picture- Almost 2 years old.

Be Your Own Kind of Beautiful (Sia)

Most recent post here.

age: 18
months pp: 15 months (WOW time sure does fly!)
weight: 96 pounds

Hello again lovely ladies! This is my last update on SOAM, again I would like to say how much this website has helped me through my struggles with my pp body! All of you woman are amazing and wonderful in your own way!

I have finally reached my pre pregnacy weight! Even though my scale says the same weight, my body is still never going to be the same. And I would not have it any other way. My daughter and I have both grown tremendously. I love the life I live and love my body just as much. Being a single mother isnt always easy, but being a mother in general is the greatest gift god has ever given me. Every day is a blessing with my beautiful little girl. I have lost all my baby weight, but I still sag non the less. haha and to my miss fortune, losing the baby weight has made me lose my breasts. I have always had a flat chest but after having Kennedy, I had the boobs I had never had before. Annndddd now they are gone once more :( oh well I guess boobs were never supposed to be in my cards. At least I save 10 bucks on bras by being able to buy them in the little girls section instead of the juniors/womans. Always a bright side to everything!! I am not going to go on a rant, as I have in my past posts. The only message I have from this post is to love your body, not matter what size and shape.I realized how much time I wasted on wishing I was thinner. Because when I look back, I dont think about how much I hated the way I looked, I think about how my daughter has grown and how smart she has become and how beautiful she is growing up to be. Be your own kind of beautiful, because we are all beautiful! Every woman is, wheather they have bared a child or not. Our bodies dont define how beautiful we are. Nor does our weight. WE ARE ALL BEAUTIFUL. Ok so I went on a little rant ;) thanks for reading!!