Author: Bonnie (SOAM)

I am a mother of 4 beautiful children. 2 boys who were born vaginally, and 2 girls who were born via Csection. My first born gave me hundreds of stretch marks, from my stomach, inner thighs, breasts and outer thighs. I didn’t get many more from the other children. My attitude towards my body changes daily. Somedays I think I look great for having 4 children. I have kept my youthful appearance since I am told many times a day I do not look 32 yrs old. But there are some days when I am getting dressed or walking out of the shower when I feel disgusted with myself. When I got pregnant with my first son I weighed about 135 lbs, at 5’5″, I gained 45 lbs with him. I kept my weight around 170 after him and after my second son. Then I lost all my weight, I was back down to 135 and shortly after got pregnant with my daughter. I had many issues through that pregnancy and didn’t gain much weight, only 22 lbs. and lost it immediately. My last daughter I weighed about 150 when I conceived her and now 18 months later I weigh 163. Right now I’m in the depressed mind about my body. I feel ashamed of it, I want to hid it, I point out the gross areas daily, each time I walk by a mirror. When my husband doesn’t want to have sex I convince myself it’s because he’s disgusted with my body. It’s a roller coaster of emotions when I think of my body, my children. In the end they are all worth it all. They are my blessing from above, and made from love. I appreciate this site and I am glad I found it, to feel there are others that feel the same way as I do helps.

I was always the skinny girl. I weighed 105lbs when I graduated high school. I was a size 3 when I got pregnant with my first son. I got huge, and got a ton of stretch marks.I had a c-section with him, and when my first son was 3 months old, I got pregnant with my second son. I had a scheduled c-section with him. So 2 c-sections less than a year apart. Not only did I have that horrible sag, but I got wide. I’ve got stretch marks on my legs, my butt, my stomach, a few on my boobs, and even one on my right calf! They are everywhere. Needless to say…I hated myself. Part of me regretted having babies so young and wished I had enjoyed my body more. I really thought I would bounce right back. I didn’t. I thought my belly was rare. I really thought I was the only one with a stomach this bad. Then an online friend shared this site, and it was like a whole new world opened up. No one posts pictures of themselves like this normally. So to finally see I wasn’t alone, and that I was normal, was such a sigh of relief. I feel bad of course, and I wish we could all have our old bodies back! But I want to thank those of you that have contributed, because it helped me, and gave me a sense of belonging, and feeling “normal”. I love this site, and I love what it does. What a great thing, for us mothers to come together and share something that haunts a lot of us, but we aren’t normally free to talk about.

I’m Paula and i want to thank you all for this website. It has been such a good thing to me knowing i’m not alone. I thought i was the only one to have so many stretchmarks. I got pregnant for first time when i was 16. The baby died in my uterus before i even knew i was pregnant. I had a surgery to take her out. It was so hard. I’ll never forget the pain of loosing her. I say her because in my inside i know it was a girl. I feel guilty because when i found out i was pregnant i was in shock and i have considered abortion. When i made my mind to have my baby i found out she was dead at least a month ago. My, then, boyfriend wanted me to have an abortion and was pressing me to do it. He said if it was his brother he would force me to do it. I was the only one who cried for my baby girl. For him it was a relief. I hated him so much. When doctors told me my baby was dead i run like a crazy, i locked myself in bathroom and cried for so long that i don’t even remember how much time. A nurse tried to calm me and said i was so young and had many time to have other babies, but i lost my baby, that baby, no other baby will replace her, never. Later, 8 months later i married my, then, boyfriend, after 3 months i got pregnant with my son, the love of my life. It wasn’t planned but it was the best thing in my life. Once again my, then, husband, didn’t want the baby. This time i didn’t even had doubts, i wanted to have my baby. And my, then, husband started to abuse me physical and worst off all, emotionally. He used my son to hurt me. Noone on my family was alowed to speak to my son or touch him, hold him and so on. It was a living hell. My son is now a very sad teenager, 14 years old, don’t talk to much and doesn’t like to be in social events. He’s always reading, in computer or sleeping. I love him so much, he’s my life, my world, i don’t even have words to describe how much i love him. Now i’m 32 years old, i’m divorced, my husband left me 1 year ago after 14 years of marriage. I was betraied, and he left me in such a way that i find myself thinking he never, ever, loved me. He said he didn’t love me anymore when we were having lunch, and in the presence of my son. Things weren’t well for a while, or never was. What’s worse it’s to be left like garbage, like i have no value whatsoever. He never thought about our family, our son. He said he didn’t want any responsabilities. Motherwood was hard on me. I had a very good pregnancy but i was letf with many scars. I have 3 stretchmarks on my belly but i have hundreds of them on my sides, tights inner and tons on outsides, my breast are covered with them, and have a lot on my calves. I’m honest, i don’t see in here anyone who has so many and so bad stretch marks has i have, even though i don’t have them in my belly. I’m so depressed, so depressed. I take bath with no light, just a light far way because i can’t stand to watch at my body, and so many time has passed. I also have a horrible scar in my left arm. When i was little i had a domestic accident, i burned my harm, i have done 4 operations and it’s still horrible. And after having my son i started losing my hair. And never got it back, it’s worse and worse. And i have varicose veins from my pregnancy also. So many issues. I don’t see anyone who has stretch marks in outer front part of tights, i see many of you who has them in belly but i have them in my sides an A LOT OF THEM on my tights. I feel i was tired apart by a tiger. I used a cream on my belly but none on sides and tights. I gained 30 kgs in 3 months, the first 4 i was almost always nauseated. I’m so sorry that i gained so much weight. Now i’m depressed, i just want to die, and hate myself.

I gave birth to my 1st child, a son, in August. It was a big surprise to find out that I was pregnant. I was in the middle of my college year and only 21 years old. My boyfriend was 30 and although I had doubts about the baby he was ready and excited. The fact that he was so eager to have the baby made the decision alot easier for me. I still had doubts until my 1st ultrasound at 11 weeks. After seeing my baby growing and changing inside me I knew I had made the right decison and I became very excited! My biggest concern about being pregnant was, of course, how my body would change. I am 5″2 and when I found out I was pregnant I was 110lbs. I loved wearing bikinis and belly tops and cute skirts and hoped and prayed my body would go back to normal. I only gained 25lbs throughout my pregnancy but I got tons of stretch marks. On my tummy and my thighs. I was devestated. I cried almost everyday. I did everything suggested to me to prevent the marks from appearing but I got them anyways. I also got PUPPPS in the last week of my pregnancy which made me soo uncomfortable and soo itchy and made my stretch marks bright red and really painful. At 41 weeks I was induced and after 10hrs of labour I gave birth to a beautiful baby boy weighing 8 lbs 5 oz. I am now 6 months pp and slowly learning to love my body. I have lost all the weight and a little more but I have a pooch I can’t seem to get rid of and My stretch marks have forever marked my once smooth,supple skin. I have days where I smile when I look at my body in the mirror because I know it was a good home for my son to grow and develop in and then there are other days when I am upset that I won’t be able to wear a bikini again and my marks make me feel like a disfigured freak. But if I had the choice I would do it all over again without even a second thought!!

I was 16 when I found out I was pregnant. It took me half a second to decide I was going to keep and raise this child. I fell in the love the first time I heard his heart beat, back when he was just a little peanut on the screen. It was a pretty easy pregnancy, oddly I wasn’t scared. Horrible labor, it took hours. I was poked for an IV 9 times. Poked for an epidural 4 times, which only lasted for 2 hours. I was on muscle relaxers for 2 days and couldn’t even pick my own leg up. But it was all worth it the second I saw my baby boy. 7 pounds 2 ounces and 19 1/4 inches. He is the most beautiful boy I have ever seen. I would go through it all again in a second for him. During pregnancy I got stretch marks all over. My whole belly wrapped around to my back. My arms and breasts, and even the back of my knees. Until recently I thought I’d never be attractive again. But with the help of a woman I met on the internet, Amy, I see that I don’t have to be afraid to be proud of my body. Her courage helped me to show you all my post pregnancy body.

I am 28 years old and just had my first baby girl 6 months ago. I started out weighing 160 lbs (after losing 25 lbs about a year earlier through diet and exersise), gained 40 lbs during pregnancy, and now I am at 170. I had a planned c-section because the hospital would not deliver her breech. It was a easy pregnancy and an easy “delivery”…and she (baby Claire) is turning out to be such a wonderful little girl. Sure, I would like to lose some baby weight (and then some), but things could be worse. My baby is happy and healthy and I am feeling pretty good in my own skin, even if sometimes I look in the mirror and feel a bit dissapointed that another day has gone by and I *still* don’t resemble Kate Moss! What’s up with that? ;) I need to remember that my daughter is going to be looking at me as a role model and I am going to need to keep a good self-image so that she will hopefully be happy with how she looks as well.

I was living in Alaska when I became pregnant. I was 21. Partying peak age. Out every weekend. Then BAM. Preggers. My finace and I had just broken up a few weeks earlier and he had moved out. I was trying to make it on my own as a low-grade manager in a clothing store. For those of you who don’t know, Alaska is an expensive state to live in. Anyway, I had what I like to call an irresponsible moment. I had met another guy and was on the rebound. I’ve never done that before. Because of this, I am unsure of who the biological father of my daughter is. I’m not the only one this has happened to, and I know this. I also don’t feel like any less of a person because of it. I moved back to my home state when I was about four months pregnant. I couldn’t afford to pay my rent anymore, let alone raise a baby. During my seventh month, a boy whom I had gone to high school with and I started talking. He claimed he had liked me since junior year. He wanted to take me out to a movie and dinner, just as friends, because he knew all of my friends lived in cities further away because of college. I agreed. We had no idea we’d fall in love. He’s been there for me since that day. He would rub and talk to my belly constantly. He stayed with me the entire time I was in labor. To me, he IS my daughter’s “daddy”. He’s been there since the day she was born, and she loves him to death. My ex fiance and I are still friends. We plan on doing a DNA test this spring when he comes home to visit. As for the other guy, he could care less about me or my daughter. But life goes on, and she’s very loved. It’s been 5 months on the 29th of February since she was born. She is my life. My angel. Random facts about my pregnancy/post-pregnancy: * I gained 60lbs. Topping out at 220lbs the day I was induced (which was my due date!) * I was officially preeclampsic the day I was due. * I have stretch marks from the back of my knees to the back of my arms all from being pregnant. * I was being treated for depression/anxiety before and during my pregnancy. During my pregnancy, my moods weren’t too bad at all. I actually felt “normal”. (I was still taking the medication during my pregnancy). After having my daughter, the moods became worse and I’ve had to have the dosage of my medicine increased. I felt like I was the ONLY one who had been through it. Now I know I wasn’t… * I was more confident about my body when I was pregnant that I EVER have been in my life.

I’m sure you’ve heard it a million times. I love your website.

I am not a mother. I am a 36 year old Ph.D. student who was doing a search for “real women” when I came across your website. Now that I am officially middle-aged, give or take, I felt I needed to see what other women my age look like. The women in my program are actually older than me or younger than me, so I thought I’d look online to see what women en masse look like in their mid-thirties. I didn’t get much on-line.

Instead, I got your website and boy do I feel silly. I was truly humbled by the strength displayed by all the women there. I’m wondering if I look as good as I did when I was in my 20s and these women, most younger than me, are displaying scars of one of the strongest loves known to man: that of a mother.

Needless to say, I now realize that I look just fine and that I will ALWAYS look just fine because we, as humans, are meant to display what we’ve accomplished physically. Whether it is age, or motherhood, or calluses from dancing, or cancer, or a surfing injury, or whatever the world may throw you, your body is the account of it and we all have our scars, wrinkles, laugh-lines, moles, grey hairs, etc.

Anyway, thank you for indulging me. Thank you for your website. Thank you for thinking about what women need.