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I and 24 and have had three children in the past 5 years. I fought with anorexia (although I was never diagnosed) when I was 17 and 18 before I got pregnant with my first child. I have always had a negative body image. I almost feel like if I’m not thin, people won’t appreciate me. They will see me as a failure.

All my pregnancies had no serious complications. I gained 60 pounds with my first (I started at 123), 50 pounds with my second (I started at 140), and 25 pounds with my third (I started at 165). I am 5’9″. I lost almost all of my weight after my first but then gained 15 pounds back after I got married. I only lost 25 pounds with my second then got pregnant when he was 8 months. My daughter is now 9 months old. I lost down to 155 because I had bad postpartum depression, but in the past few months have gone back up to 170 since I am HAPPY again ;o).

I don’t exercise because I am LAZY. Even though I am the biggest I have ever been, I am not depressed like I used to get about my weight. I think most of it is because I have three children to show for it. I love my body because of what it has given me, but I DO want it to be healthy. I want to feel better physically. I can feel how heavy I am and THAT’S what bothers me more than what I look like. I’m determined to get in shape. I don’t mind being this size. I just want to be healthy.

I’m not ashamed of my stretch marks. I have them all over. On my hips and belly and breasts. The thing I hate the most about my body is my “mom butt/hips” and my belly flap. It just hangs there when I even slightly bend over.

The women I see on this site are so beautiful. Stretch marks. Scars. Boobies that are less than “perfect”. It’s amazing because of what we’ve been through. Wouldn’t it be amazing if we could see ourselves through over people’s eyes? I don’t think we’d see the same thing at all. We are our own worse critic.

in Belly, Breastfeeding, Breasts, Butt, Eating Disorder, Postpartum, Submissions, Tattoo, Third Pregnancy
30 comments… add one
  • Anna Friday, April 3, 2009, 11:55 am

    You’ve got a really sexy body and great tits! You look great!

  • That's Me! Friday, April 3, 2009, 12:30 pm

    I meant to list the pictures. The first 3 are obviously my bod-ay! The 4th is my “belly flap” that I mentioned in the post. The 5th is my baby belly (I’m not pregnant in this picture, even though I look like it). The 6th are my sweet babies! And the 7th is me, nursing, in a bowling alley. And no, I don’t cover up. She hates being covered up and I don’t feel like I should have to as long as I’m discreet (which I am)!

  • Mary Friday, April 3, 2009, 12:35 pm

    You are so beautiful!!! And your little ones are adorable!!! you are right, we are our own worst critic, and people dont even notice the flaws that we worry over all the time!

  • Keri Friday, April 3, 2009, 3:13 pm

    Your body is beautiful – just like the ones you see in the Renaissance paintings. You have gorgeous feminine curves!

  • jo Friday, April 3, 2009, 3:41 pm

    you are one of the sexiest women I have ever seen in my life – the fact that your body looks that amazing and it has given birth to amazing and beautiful children makes you absolutely perfect.

  • Ann Marie Friday, April 3, 2009, 5:54 pm

    wow you look great for having 3 BEAUTIFUL children! I also have the mommy love handles that I cant wait to lose. I am 11 months post partum with my first child and yet havent lost them, not sure if they are permanently staying :/ We are our own worst critic and we need to just love ourselves the way we are b/c yes our bodies have given us the best gift of all….Our gorgeous children. You can view my post at young 20 year old mother and wife.

  • taiyo Friday, April 3, 2009, 7:55 pm

    All I can say is you’re hot! Gorgeous.

  • Angele Friday, April 3, 2009, 8:42 pm


  • Colleen Friday, April 3, 2009, 9:04 pm

    Even though you think you’re too heavy, you look very sexy! You carry the weight in all the right places and have gorgeous curves…and to be honest, how often do you lean over, naked, in front of anybody except yourself and your husband? Maybe it’s just the pictures but I can’t see your stretch marks at all.

    And I know exactly what you mean by wanting to be healthy–before I got pregnant I was 135 pounds, and a perfect hourglass figure, but I was desperately out of shape (because I’m also lazy!). People seem to forget that exercise is for something other than weight loss. Do what you need to to feel better about yourself :)

  • Shealene Saturday, April 4, 2009, 12:15 am

    I soooooo wish I had your butt. My butt is basically non-existent…I gots me a pancake ass.

  • Bella Saturday, April 4, 2009, 3:57 am


  • J Saturday, April 4, 2009, 4:33 am

    You and your family are very beautiful – your body is stunningly feminine, curvy and soft as it should be. I don’t have love handles but in some ways wish I had but less on top (my post ‘Postpartum 25 and 21 years later’). You would make a perfect artist’s model – who wants to see a bag of bones with no figure!!!

  • That's Me! Saturday, April 4, 2009, 10:14 am

    Wow! I’m honestly surprised by all the comments. I just wanted to share my “flaws” and let women see how I look too. You know how I take them though, (as most women probably do), “But you don’t see my in real life!” or “Those pictures just make me look good” ;o)

    I am so thankful for all of your comments. I have a VERY loving husband and he makes me feel like a princess (most of the time, heh) but he just doesn’t know what to say to me. He’s very reserved so sometimes I take it as he isn’t attracted to me (which I should know better).

    Thank you SO much!

  • Amy Saturday, April 4, 2009, 4:35 pm

    You are absolutely beautiful. You look much better the way you are now than you would if you were model-thin. You think your butt and hips are a drawback, but they only contribute to your sexiness. Your breasts are full and fabulous. And you have a pretty face on top of all that!

  • Holly Saturday, April 4, 2009, 10:51 pm

    you are awesome.

  • Holly Saturday, April 4, 2009, 10:53 pm

    oh…and I’m jealous of your boobs! you look great!

  • Kristen Sunday, April 5, 2009, 12:53 pm

    I was thinking that you have what I would call a Renaissance body, just like in a famous painting. Sounds a lot like what J said in you having a model’s body.

  • Nicole Monday, April 6, 2009, 2:14 am

    You’ve had three kids and you’re body looks that good??? Wow.
    I can’t even see your stretch marks in those photos.
    Lol i’m 18 and I have two children and my boobs are saggier than yours…. you should be proud.

  • Jen Monday, April 6, 2009, 9:18 am

    If you are caring for 3 kids 5 and under you are not lazy…you just don’t have enough energy to run more after running after kids all day!

    You are beautiful! What a blessing to have such a healthy body image….I love the breastfeeding pic..my baby hates cover-ups as well.

  • Mama Saturday, April 11, 2009, 1:10 am

    You are beautiful!!!! I have mom butt at 24, so I know your pain lol. I hate it, but when I see it in your photos, I think that you have a beautiful bottom… maybe I should be looking at my body differently?

  • rose Wednesday, April 22, 2009, 2:15 am

    SEXY mama!! your breasts are still so perky!! mine seem to hang down to my knees when i look at ur pics lol. you have 3 gorgeous children!

  • Mike Thursday, April 30, 2009, 1:57 am

    Your breasts look great they don’t look like they sag at all for their size. Woman go get plastic surgery to get breasts as shapley as yours.

  • Lynne Monday, May 11, 2009, 7:44 pm

    You’re breasts are amazing, and you’re gorgeous. Awesome attitue about everything, way to go!

  • Dale Friday, May 15, 2009, 3:07 pm

    You are very beautiful. If women understood that most men prefer real women such as you, we wouldn’t have these misconceptions of what a woman’s body should look like. I think you/your pictures are beautiful and I’m sure your husband appreciates your body very much.

    My wife is going through the same emotions right now and I’m trying to find ways to encourage her and let her know that I love her “moms” body. To me, a mother is the sexiest kind of woman in the world!

    Keep on keepin’ on!

  • rita Thursday, May 28, 2009, 6:16 am

    oh what a beautiful family! look at what your amazing body has produced! three cuties- your body reminds me of those beautiful old pictures of greek goddesses- sweetie- you are so hot you are on fire! i’ve had two kids and i wish that my breasts were that perky. –

  • Tinia Friday, August 7, 2009, 7:38 pm

    I think your outlook it great, and you do look fantastic!

  • Sharon Wednesday, November 18, 2009, 7:24 am

    I think you look lovely and I also loved reading about your recovery and self acceptance as I fought Anorexia and Bulimia for 11 years.

    I am now close to the heaviest I have ever been, 20 weeks pregnant and really loving my changing body.

  • John Tuesday, February 2, 2010, 12:34 pm

    Your body is absolutely amazing and I would love to come home to you every day :)

  • rachel Wednesday, February 10, 2010, 7:10 pm

    wow! you look amazing and have such a great attitude!! Thank you for your post :

  • jerryred Wednesday, June 30, 2010, 12:21 pm

    oh my goodness you are amazing !!!! so so may i say it sexy !!! thankyou for your words inspiring indeed :)

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