Some of my wisest mom friends shared with me that it’s best to NOT have a birth plan…I shouldve listened to that little feeling tugging on my gut! Ah well…se la vi!!
I was initially soo upset (combined with hormones post partum!!) about having a cestion…I had my heart set on a vbirth with no drugs…but my baby turned sunny side up when I was in labor!!! It was soooo painful that I had to get an epidural. Then because her vitals were fine they let me try pushing for 5 hours in a variety of positions…yes even on my hands and knees! They would turn my baby and it would just turn back around…
Anyway, what I realize is that it’s not a friggin contest mommies!! The most important thing is the baby being healthy and safe..AND there are siginificant perks to csection…like our privates don’t get ruined and daddies get to bond with the baby :-).
At any rate, I am lovin every minute with my sweet baby and am slowly seeing my tummy shrink!! My ta-tas are different too but it’s so worth it to look in my babys beautiful eyes each day and to know she’s getting some liquid gold to get her off to a right start!!!
Thanks for reading and take care
I have had three vaginal births and I am so thankful for that experience because my body seems to snap back faster than my friends whom have had a c-section and have been left with a mother’s apron and have told me that they would have given anything to have a vaginal birth. If it’s an emergency than there is nothing you can do about it and it’s all about what is best for the baby. As far as the privates being ruined, mine is just as tight as it’s always been, feels no different to me nor hubby, that’s what kegels are for and having a baby vaginally is the way its been done for centuries, so I am sure that mom’s who have had vaginal births are just fine with their privates, and if some have experienced issues, than I pray that they are okay mentally and spirtually and know that it is not their fault and I pray it’s not affecting their self esteem. Also, after vaginal birth the dad gets to bond right away as well, my husband held our sons for hours right after a vaginal birth all three times. No it’s not a contest and it’s good that you see some perks in having had a csection, I am sure it was a disappointment in the beginning when you had your heart and mind set on a different path, but I am glad you are happy with the outcome…
I agree with you that giving birth is not a contest between moms. However saying that vaginal births end up in “ruined privates” is simply disrespectful. I would never say that your tummy is ruined because of your C-section. It takes time for c-section scars to heal, same thing here- it takes time for vaginas to heal. For those of us who tore it might take a few months and even longer to feel completely healed. So ladies lets write our stories with respect in mind towards other moms.
First congrats on your beautiful baby. And im glad you are happy with how things turned out…However i have to agree it wasnt very nice to say that ppl who have vaginal birth get their privates ruined. I have had 4 babies…all natural vaginal births and my vaginal is still tight.My husband and I dont notice a different either.
Hi there,
I gave birth vaginally nine weeks ago and I can attest that that my privates just ain’t what they used to be! In fact, I had an appointment to see my midwife today to get some scar tissue removed with acid. I didn’t take any offense at your comment at all. Having a baby is generally hard on the body, whether it’s done via c-section or vaginally. I’m glad that you are able to find an upside to your experience. Hope you and the baby are doing wonderfully!
As some one’s who’s experienced both, a c-section and a VBAC, I’ll take a vaginal birth any day! For me it was a MUCH better experience and a MUCH better recovery. And nothing is “ruined” from either birth :)
Glad you’re happy with the outcome though, I had a really hard time accepting my c-section, I was also set on an all natural drug free birth and when after 34 hours I had to have a c-section it was very traumatic :(
VBA2C here (yay me!) and I have to agree that every.single.birth. is different. I’ve got stuff drooping all over the place (including my boobs even though I’ve never breast fed), but that would have happened anyway because of gravity :-) To the OP – you can hear the excitement in your voice. I’m glad you get to take this wonderful journey :-)
I actually requested a c-section and haven’t had a single bad thought about the THREE c-sections I’ve had :-) I have the “mothers apron” tummy and I’m cool with it, lol. I didn’t find the recovery to be hard or painful cause I can take a little pain, I’m a mom, right?! I also did not want the stretched or loose “privates”. Thanks for speaking what you feel! Loved the post.
I don’t think the OP was trying to be offensive when she wrote that the privates would be “ruined” from vaginal birth. I think she was trying to find the positives of having a c-section. Let’s face it, if you have a vaginal birth, there is no possible way that things will remain completely unchanged. That’s not to say that things will be drastically changed south of the border either. But to say that it’s just like before is simply not true.. it’s physically not possible no matter if you do kegals all day long!
A lot of the women responding to this posting are still responding with a snarky, competitive attitude. Why can’t we celebrate both forms of the birthing process? They are both great and have their benefits!
I think the most important part is how you feel about it. I feel I have had a wonderful delivery every single time, despite 4 c-sections. I wanted to birth naturally, drug free in a pool. Well, total opposite journey for me. I felt sadness after the first but after the second, I let that go.
I’m so glad you found peace with it and have been able to see it for what it is, a safe way to deliver your baby when the ‘normal’ way isn’t working out. I know that I personally would possibly not be alive (nor my second child) if not for the wonders of modern c-sections. It’s just how it is.
I too had a cesarean after planning for a drug-free natural birth. Baby was breech and I was devastated, but I learned to love my scar (I’ve written about it several times on here, and once on TIAW). My second baby was induced, sunny-side up, pitocin, epidural, pushing on my back, almost-third-degree tear. But you know what? I had a freaking VBAC! I’m still searching for my “perfect” birth but each one gives me a beautiful baby, a learning experience, and a new scar that my body will hold onto forever to remember that wonderful day. Congratulations on your wee one and finding the beauty in her birth! (and btw, I found sex after the VBAC to be LESS painful than after the cesarean, despite the tear. But to each his own).
I’m with Mara: Leave the snarky at the door, please. Be supportive. Obviously this woman wasn’t trying to make anyone feel bad about themselves. People on here can be so touchy.
@Nina-Yes. These are touchy subjects. We are talking about insecurities and feelings of self doubt on this site so it is a touchy subject. Congrats on your little one OP!
Actually Mara, your vagina can remain the same or even tighter. I can attest to it.