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The Body I’ve Always Wanted to Change

January 9, 2014

Age:20
Numbers of Births/Pregnancies: 1

I am currently 2 months and 8 days postpartum. I was a tiny girl in high school and even then I always felt fat like I needed to lose weight, and the only time I felt pretty was when I wasn’t eating at all and exercising excessively. Then I got into college and I got confident somewhat, but I still exercised and ate healthy and remained tiny. Well after all the work of becoming confident I fell in love with the man of my dreams and I got pregnant, I wouldn’t change my life for anything and I love my little family but it really knocked my confidence into the ground once I saw my body afterwards. I’m only two months postpartum and was told by the nutritionist that I need to lose 25lbs, (I gained 55 in pregnancy). So not only do I feel like I look fat but I have others telling me to lose 25 pounds! I’m trying to stay positive and tell myself I can do it but I don’t know how to do that with everything going on in my life. My boyfriend says I’m beautiful and that I don’t really look like I changed but I see different. My whole life there has always been something about myself that I’ve wanted to change and I’m tired of that unsatisfied feeling. I want to feel beautiful and look beautiful to others. I want to wear a bikini this summer and have people ask me how I did it! My mom bounced back so well, she had no stretch marks and looked like she didn’t have one child when she actually had 3. I just wish that all women would be defined as beautiful not just the super tiny ones. One thing I do love about my post pregnancy body is the curves, but if it’s possible to get smaller I’d feel better I think.

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11 Responses to “The Body I’ve Always Wanted to Change”

  1. Sara Says:
    January 9th, 2014 at 12:08 pm

    25lbs!? What!? Why would ANYONE tell you that? If your nutritionist is using the BMI scale to determine your ideal weight then please ignore her. The BMI was invented by a Belgian mathematician a few hundred years ago to help the Belgian government allocate resources. It was never meant to be used on individuals and it was never meant to be used for medical purposes. It is severely flawed as it does not take into account gender, age or fitness level. You look fantastic already. Focus on your fitness level, your energy level and your own sense of well-being. Work in some moderate exercise into your routine and continue good eating habits. But please don’t listen to anyone who says you need to lose 25lbs. That is madness! Your boyfriend is right! You look lovely and you have great curves. Rock a bikini this summer!

  2. Natalie Says:
    January 9th, 2014 at 3:17 pm

    Your body looks so much like mine, and I am 1year,and 8 months PP. I agree with your man, you look gorgeous, just look at those curves! with some time your belly will go down some, and stretch marks fade. I know what it’s like to be tiny and gain 50 lbs. I did not get my teenage body back but that is because I can not erase the fact that I carried my precious babe for 9 months, nor do I want to. 25 lbs sounds like too much weight to lose for a beautiful body like yours. I hope you will come to a point where you look in the mirror and realize how beautiful you are.

  3. Cassie Says:
    January 9th, 2014 at 9:04 pm

    You look great to only be 2 months pp. Don’t rush things you will lose more weight and your stretch marks will fade. Look at it this way, it took your body 40 weeks to grow your baby, so expect it to take as long for your body to get completely back to normal. I’ve had 3 and every time it seems like I’m not completely back to normal until about a year after. Don’t be so hard on yourself, right now just focus on your beautiful baby.

  4. Jason Says:
    January 10th, 2014 at 11:13 am

    Here’s something slightly different: a male perspective.

    1) You already do look gorgeous. Those are wonderful pictures that you have shown, and I applaud your courage for putting them up. If you were on the same beach as me in a bikini, you’d turn my head!

    2) Who are you trying to “look beautiful” for? Your boyfriend? He loves the way you look, by what you say. Other men? Why, you have a boyfriend that you love and want to be with. Other women? Other mothers should understand the changes in a woman’s body after pregnancy and women who have never had a baby have no room to chime in. Women are catty anyway. The general public saying a woman’s body has a very narrow range to achieve beauty? To heck with them!

    3) Men have more range in what they find beautiful than women realize. That concept of beauty also changes with many men as they grow older, mature, and experience different life events (such as becoming a father). Constant obsession over your weight and image could send the message to your boyfriend that you don’t trust that he really finds you beautiful the way you are.

    4) Love yourself right now! Feeling beautiful for yourself can mean either changing your body OR changing your self-perception. The first is much easier to change than the second, but the second is much more powerful and long-lasting.

  5. Stephanie Says:
    January 11th, 2014 at 7:26 am

    Oh sweetheart if you lose 25 lbs you will not be healthy. I can’t imagine what that ‘nutritionist’ is thinking. You look gorgeous! I am 7 years postpartum and don’t look that good,,,,,and I work out 5 days a week. No one can make you ‘feel’ it, but please pray to be able to see yourself clearly. And you could rock a bikini right now and you just had a baby 8 weeks ago.

  6. Roxane Says:
    January 15th, 2014 at 4:30 pm

    Hello babe!

    I’m 25 years and 6 months pregnant and I always have a nice body but felt it was never good enough. I suffered form bulimia and anorexia, but I worked on me, and the last three years, I was finaly feeling good about my body. When my boyfriend and I decided we were ready to have our first baby, I was scared about the physical change after the pregnancy and how I would deal with it, but lookin at you I’m totally in peace! You are gorgeous, your body is sexy, and believe me I’m really (and stupidly) critical. Go shop for your new bikini girl and rock it this summer!

  7. Steph Says:
    January 15th, 2014 at 7:49 pm

    I had my first baby at 19, gained 60 lbs on a tiny frame, and it took about a year to lose it all with reasonable diet and exercise. I ended up looking better than before, so don’t think it’s the end of the world. I agree with others 25 pounds seems unlikely. I don’t think there is 25 pounds of fat on you :/ You’ll be shocked of the changes in the next few months.

  8. Amanda Says:
    January 18th, 2014 at 2:33 am

    25 pounds?! Of what?! You are no where near fat!!! You do have some rockin’ curves though! Your boyfriend is right, you look fantastic :) and I don’t mean this offensively (I bet your mom is gorgeous too!) But is some cultures women mourn for other women who DON’T have stretch marks because it usually means that they have never had children ;) I don’t know if that helps or not but for me knowing that in some places it is seen as a wonderful thing to have actually made a whole world of difference for me <3 I hope you can start to see yourself for the stunning mama that you are <3

  9. Heather Says:
    February 4th, 2014 at 1:11 am

    You look great especially your legs!!!!!! My belly went back to normal after my first baby after about 6 months and my second didn’t take as long. I gained more than you did w my first. Don’t worry so much about it.. It’s too soon to be completely perfect but you’re looking great and will keep getting better!! I’m on number 3 now curious to see how I end up after baby lol 3 in 5 years

  10. Mai85 Says:
    February 16th, 2014 at 7:35 am

    I am pregnant myself, and i am looking for real pictures and experiences post-partum (as many i´m scared of the changes). I am happy i found your pictures because i think you look amazing and that gives me hope. Listen to all the people that tell you you are beautiful, because you are! :)

  11. taran Says:
    April 4th, 2014 at 2:12 pm

    You have my ideal body! My stretch marks are way worse, but I wish my belly would shrink to look like yours.

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