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Thankful and Blessed but Still Trying to Accept (mummyoftwodarlings)

May 14, 2009

Ok, so I have been visiting this site for over a year now in the hope of it helping me accept and love my post baby body.

I am 30 years old, mother of 2 beautiful children. A daughter aged 3 and a son aged 16 months.

I married my first love in 2004 at around 147 lbs (I am 5ft 6.5). We decided pretty much straight after to start trying for a baby and after 6 months of hoping and praying every month, I finally got that positive result…..and then another…and so on until I’d worked my way through about 20 of the things and finally convinced myself that this was real and I was pregnant!

I had no problems until I reached 30 weeks. I was at work, about to lead a training day for about 20 teachers and I popped to the toilet first. That is when I noticed a few drops of blood. Panic stricken, I was rushed to the nearest hospital. To cut a long story short my darling daughter was delivered by emergency c section at 31 weeks exactly, as I was suffering a major placental abruption and she could have died if she stayed inside me any longer. She weighed 3lbs 7oz and stayed in Special Care Baby Unit for 6 weeks but is now thank God happy, healthy and very entertaining!

As I never got that big by 31 weeks my body pretty much went back to normal afterwards. A year later we decided to try for another, our last baby. I fell pregnant straight away but unfortunately miscarried at about 6 weeks. Fast forward another 6 weeks and I found myself staring at another positive test! Luckily the pregnancy went fairly smoothly and at 37 weeks my waters broke. I had to be induced though as nothing else was happening but despite that, I managed to deliver my son naturally. He has a few tummy problems after birth and stayed in hospital for a week in which time the problems righted themselves. After our daughter’s 6 week stay a week was bearable although I couldn’t wait to get him home!

During the last few weeks of my second pregnancy I developed a few stretch marks on my belly which to be honest I was gutted about. I religiously applied lotions and potions in the hope of avoiding them. I guess I was just that much bigger than first time around as I had carried my son for 6 weeks longer.

After the birth I weighed around 165 lbs, the most I had ever weighed. I lost the excess weight by about 5/6 months pp by joining a slimming group and going to the gym but then I gained about 14 lbs of that back over the next 10 months. I felt horrible about my stretched, saggy post baby belly and the excess weight wasn’t helping either so I rejoined the slimming group and restarted the exercise and here I am, 4 lbs away from my goal weight of 140 lbs and clothed I feel great but when I look at my belly I feel so disappointed.

I wouldn’t change having my children for any model’s body, and having to experience both my babies fight in hospital has made me so thankful for what I have. I am slowly learning to accept my new body and realise that the old one is gone for good. I am never going to look like my baby-less friends but I have something far more precious than their flab free, stretch mark free tummies!

The photos are:
29 weeks pregnant with #1 (2 weeks before she arrived)
36 weeks pregnant with #2 with stretchmarks (a few days before he arrived)
2 Today at 16 months pp with the baby belly I am still trying to accept

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18 Responses to “Thankful and Blessed but Still Trying to Accept (mummyoftwodarlings)”

  1. tessa Says:
    May 14th, 2009 at 8:14 am

    u look great!

  2. summer Says:
    May 14th, 2009 at 8:49 am

    what baby belly? You look great!

  3. H Says:
    May 14th, 2009 at 9:40 am

    Yep, Tessa is right. GREAT!

  4. Diana Says:
    May 14th, 2009 at 10:34 am

    You look amazing in all of your photos!

  5. samera Says:
    May 14th, 2009 at 12:38 pm

    OMG I can’t believe how good your tummy looks, do you realise you dont even look like you’ve had kids??? GOOD on you I wish I were the same!

  6. Bridget Says:
    May 14th, 2009 at 12:39 pm

    You look completely awesome! The definition of your abs and your cute belly button are beautiful! Congratulations on your precious babies and for soon reaching your goal. Don’t feel disappointed, your body did its job and you are taking care of it nicely. Love and cherish it for what it has done. Great job!

  7. jean Says:
    May 14th, 2009 at 1:04 pm

    you look great, i love your hips,lol…i hope mine go like that after i have my second kid (due in sept) you have nice flat stomach too.

  8. Angele Says:
    May 14th, 2009 at 6:22 pm

    OMG! Accept it! You look outstanding! Look at the definition in those abs!! Seriously! Im jealous!

  9. Marie Says:
    May 14th, 2009 at 6:40 pm

    I think your abs are freaking awesome! I’m 24 weeks along with my first kid and this site helps me stay sane about my body. Thanks for posting.

  10. karina Says:
    May 14th, 2009 at 9:45 pm

    You should really be thankful for how beautiful you still look after giving birth to 2 babies! I am 4’11 and my son was 7lbs 11oz… he was HUGE for me and I have the stretch marks to prove it… they are truly a badge and I cannot understand why so many women find them disgusting. I am only 22, I had my son when I was 21… I am 7months pp & even though I am 20lbs heavier, I love my body. It has done SOOO Much! My body is not quite as beautiful as yours… you look amazing, but my body is mine and I love it… you should be thankful for how great you look. U truly do look good!

  11. taiyo Says:
    May 14th, 2009 at 10:23 pm

    Wow. Looking at you, I totally think, you’re the ideal! (Which is something I hate that our culture has, but it still exists…) I wish you could see yourself the way the rest of us do. You’re gorgeous! Thanks for sharing your story.

  12. Christie Says:
    May 15th, 2009 at 4:56 am

    OMG! What baby belly? Look at your abs, you look amazing :) Congratulations!

  13. Catherine S Says:
    May 15th, 2009 at 12:32 pm

    Damn woman, you are smokin:) Can barely see your stretchies and your hips and tummy are so little. It is so hard for me to see whhy you wouldn’t be very happy with your PP body.

  14. mummyoftwodarlings Says:
    May 16th, 2009 at 11:05 am

    Thanks everyone for your kind comments! Looking at the photos I don’t look as bad as maybe I think I do, and let’s face it, I probably still wouldn’t be happy if I looked like Cameron Diaz (although that would be nice!)

  15. joanne b Says:
    May 16th, 2009 at 11:20 am

    Hi mummyoftwo darlings…brilliant blog hun and you look amazing…you always do!!!

  16. Shelley Says:
    May 17th, 2009 at 10:31 am

    I hate that society tries to make women feel so bad about themselves and their bodies! There is NOTHING wrong with your stomach. You look perfectly fine. Yes, our bodies change after pregnancy. If we were all meant to look like we were 17 years old, we wouldn’t ever age. And what a shame that would be. You couldn’t pay me to be a teenager again, no matter what kind of body I had then.

  17. Kylie Says:
    May 19th, 2009 at 10:27 am

    Wow, you look great! I would kill to have a tum tum like yours!! …do I even see somewhat of a six pack??? (jealous :) )

  18. Rachel Says:
    April 11th, 2010 at 9:15 pm

    I think your stomach looks REALLY good! I see a six pack there! And your stretch marks are barely noticable, and they’ll fade more and more over time… You’re sexy!!

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