I read about all of the women who have gone from being in shape, looking great and feeling good to looking like a “mother.” I read about how you are now comfortable and accepting of your new “beautiful” self. I am not as strong as you are. I want to be where you are mentally and I am looking to learn how you got to where you are.
I was a size 0; 119 lbs before the birth of my son 14 months ago. My hobby was going to the gym and working out. It was/is my stress reliever. I got back to my old size, yet I am left with stretch marks on my stomach, sagging/floppy boobs, huge nipples (I breast fed for 12 months) extra skin on my stomach and diastasis recti. The latter issue doesn’t bother me that much.
I am pregnant again–25 weeks along. I obviously look pregnant, like I should. In addition to me not being comfortable in my new skin, I also have dark, huge aerolas–which I think is pregnancy related! To me it is so unattractive.
I never had time to get use to my the new me because I am now pregnant again. But the issue lies here…
I don’t want to be touched or seen naked by my husband. In bed I have to be covered with a blanket. If I look down and see myself, I don’t find myself sexy and i get upset at what I see. I don’t want to be touched where the extra skin lies nor on my huge nipples! I get so upset and mad. I don’t feel like I deserve to feel good.
On tv and in movies, you never see people like “us” playing sexy roles and if you did it would ruin what the show is trying to capture. How can one find me/us attractive. I don’t get it?!!
There are boundaries in bed which I know isn’t good but I can’t get comfortable and accepting of the new me. Feeling good and feeling sexy is important for a good relationship.
I feel good in clothes and no matter how often others tell me I look good–I need to feel sexy and good with myself (naked). I know confidence is sexy, but I’m just not any longer. Even if I begin to feel cofident, I don’t feel I have the right to be. How did you do it? How did you begin to truly love your new self? Please help. I am miserable and my relationship with my husband isn’t where is should be.
~Your Age: 29
~Number of pregnancies and births: 2nd pregnancy
~The age of your children, or how far postpartum you are: 14 months and 1 on the way; due 11/3