Hi there, I’m a long time follower of this site and I do hope my submission is accepted. I’ve struggled so much with myself after (and during) pregnancy, but I’ve finally got the guts up to give this a shot.
I’m 26 years old, living in Australia. I get a lot of grief from others about being too young (excuse me?) and unmarried (not their business!) when I had my baby. She was a surprise – I have PCOS and have been told since I was a teen I wouldn’t have kids. Ha! I had a miscarriage a few month before I fell pregnant with my my baby girl, which was difficult.
Anyway, she’s 4 months old now, and she’s perfect. I feel like the failure. I had to have her by section (hooray breech babies!) and breast feeding failed because I got ill after the surgery (complications). I’m 155cm tall, and I was 47kg before I was pregnant. I was 66kg at delivery. I’m now 55kg and I feel gross. I look at myself and my hideous scar and just cry. I hate getting dressed because I don’t think anything looks good on me anymore. I was banned from exercise due to the surgical complications, so I’ve just been trying to eat healthily but it doesn’t quite cut it. And no amount of healthy eating or exercise can get rid of the scar from the section. My partner doesn’t listen when I try to talk to him about how I’m feeling, he just says things like ‘you knew things would be different, stop worrying about it, it doesn’t matter…’ But it does matter. It’s so hard to get confidence back, and when your partner (who is supposed to love and adore the baby AND you) pretty much ignores you and shows not much interest, it’s super hard.
Anyway, I attach my photos to try and be brave.