Five Years Old

The last few days have been a strange whirlwind of PMS hormones and the resulting emotions, insomnia and the resulting exhaustion, and some strange allergic reaction and the resulting Benedryl (And, FYI, watching Twin Peaks after taking a Benedryl is, well, exactly how you’d think it is). Under normal circumstances I’d be more prepared to celebrate SOAM’s fifth birthday (this may be wishful thinking) but this entire year has been just about as strange as the last few days and I’m just trying to keep swimming. But five years is a big deal and I want to mark it somehow.

Day 95 Learned Love

Five years and some months ago, I had that moment in the restaurant in Anaheim that sparked this thought that maybe I wasn’t the only one. The idea took hold and grew as I talked with people about it. And then, one warm July day, as my four year old was taking a nap, I snapped a picture of myself holding the baby, and uploaded it to a new blog. And here we are.

stretchmarks

Five years ago I was a different person, at a different place in my journey to self-love. Five years ago, the world was a little different, too. The internet changes things, makes the world smaller. Today it’s so much easier to connect with people who are going through the same things you are going through. Today it’s so much easier to find the information you need for your journey. Five years ago SOAM was just born and now it’s a staple for moms online.

Mama

I think right now we are at a sort of crossroads in this fight against society’s idea of what a woman should look like. Over the last five years I have witnessed a massive shift away from that idea. Unfortunately, I have also felt society grip that idea even stronger as it feels us pulling away. So we still have a lot of work to do before women are totally free from it, until we are free to love ourselves as we are, at every step along our own roads. But you mamas have shown me that we can do it.

belly line up

So, let’s celebrate! Leave a comment here and you’ll be entered to win a copy of Fifty Nude Women which, as I’ve said before, is one of the best short films ever made. I’m also running a contest over on TIAW, so check that out and you can double your chances of winning (although I will make sure the same person doesn’t win both contests). I’ll run both contests until this Friday at midnight and I’ll announce the winners on Saturday Monday. The winners will have until midnight on Monday Wednesday to get me their addresses, or I’ll choose another winner.

UPDATE: Contest is now closed and winners announced! Thanks for participating!

And Diego met the Pacific Ocean

Thank you, all of you. You are beautiful!

(Photos from the SOAM Flickr Pool, all submitted within the last year.)

Introducing…..!

(So it turns out that despite all the work I did last week announcing this elsewhere on the web I did not actually post it here. I feel a little like a new mom who forgot for nearly a week to let her oldest child know she’s now a big sister. That happens, right? *ahem* Anyway, I’m sneakily changing the time on the entry to make it look like I posted it before I did. Just play along.)

Introducing….. This is a Woman! The long-awaited new website, sister to SOAM, focusing on all aspects of womanhood. I’m so excited that it’s finally a reality and I’m looking forward to all the good work we will do together over there. Go check it out, spread the word, submit an entry, grab a cup of coffee and let’s talk. ?

Exciting News

In 2006, when I started this website and it went from scratch to worldwide in less than a month I was struck by the deep need for such a website to exist in this culture. Women responded to it with such emotion – relief, gratitude and love among others – that I knew we’d been craving it for generations. Almost immediately I decided I wanted to create a sister website that reflected what all women look like, even if they haven’t birthed a child. A site where women of all ages, sizes and colors have the opportunity not only to work on body and self love in more general terms than just pregnancy, but also to discuss issues like mastectomies and how it effects body love. And, of course, always showing the world what real bodies, in all their diversity, look like.

I’ve tried a couple of times to get this dream of mine going, but for reasons behind the scenes it’s never happened – until now! We are working on it as I speak and it will be up and running in the next few weeks! I’ll keep you updated on that as it progresses, but in the mean time I wanted to ask you to spread the word and to send me submissions for anything you’d like to share. Tell your grandmothers, your aunts, your little sisters – ask them to share their stories, pain, love and wisdom with us.

Over the last almost five years I’ve felt a shift in body image and, while Hollywood might not get it yet, the rest of us do. Together we can make big changes. We can heal ourselves and help the next generations toss self-hatred right out the window. I’m so excited!!

Here’s how to participate:

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**Please do not submit professional photographs unless YOU are the photographer or can have the photographer e-mail me his or her permission. Due to copyright laws I cannot post photos without the photographer’s direct permission.**

By submitting an entry you agree…

…to allow me to post your photos and/or story here on this website, and you realize that this is the internet and a public forum.

…that if your photos include nudity, you are over 18 years old and were at the time the photos were taken.

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TO SUBMIT A STORY:
Email the following information to TIAWsubmissions@gmail.com!

What to include:
~Title of your entry:
~The name you want posted with your entry (“Anonymous” is fine):
~Your story or thoughts if you want to include something:
~Will you give permission to use this entry in the media, if needed? (Not necessary, but appreciated)
~If you would like me to close comments on your entry, please let me know – otherwise I will leave them open by default.
~Don’t forget to attach photos!

You may also choose to include:
~Your Age:
~Any key words (surgeries, infertility, plus-sized, health complications, etc):

SOAM to be Featured on the Today Show’s Wesbite!

Rebecca, the woman putting the story together would like to enlist your help. Here’s her message to you:

“I’m writing a story for TODAY.com, the TODAY show’s web site, about Shape of a Mother. I’ve talked to Bonnie about how she started the site, and how it’s become such an empowering experience for women to accept the changes in their body and find their beauty after having children. I’d love to talk to some women who have sent in photos to Shape of a Mother: What inspired you to send your photo? How did you feel about sharing it with the world? Did your experience change the way you feel about your body? Why do you think this web site is important?

“I would love to hear your thoughts – my e-mail address is Rebecca.dube@msnbc.com. Please include your first and last name, your age and the number of children you have. Thanks very much, and I look forward to hearing from you!”