Update (Anonymous)

Original entry here.

A little over a year ago I wrote on this site because I was upset with my body one year after giving birth to my amazing son. Things did get better, I got into a swimsuit and started working out, but never had the time between school and motherhood to get to my goal. I am 24 and four months ago I gave birth to another beautiful and precious boy. I am back at the sad place again. Not a day goes by where I don’t obsess over my disgusting body and think how desperately I want to loose 15 lbs! I dislike my saggy breast, huge nipples, big love handles, and the fanny pack stomach I can’t hide. Seeing my tiny sister, who has not had children, complain about her stomach and size, makes me feel like a whale. I want to shield my husband away from all the size two models on the television and every girl that walks by that has a perfect body. I am so scared he thinks that he wishes his wife still looked like “that girl”. Recently, my husband went to a bachelor party and the group went inside a topless bar. My husband was one of the good ones where he just sat at a far away table, while the other guys received lap dances. Just knowing he saw a great rack and had to come home to me the next day makes me sick to my stomach. He tells me I am beautiful and sexy,etc. but I think he just says those words because he love me. I would love to see a trainer, get plastic surgery on my breasts, etc. but those actions won’t heal my low self-esteem. I’ve had some tragedy in my life (physical & mental abuse, miscarriages, etc.) that I need to deal with so I can get better. I want to love myself again and I am scared that my insecurities will have an impact on my marriage. Thank you for this website, its my affordable therapy :)

3 thoughts on “Update (Anonymous)

  • Wednesday, November 3, 2010 at 9:54 am

    Yes your husband does love you. Like me with my wife she posted here too. My Story is Long (Anonymous). To me her body is beautiful and because of her selfless love for me and our children I now see her with perfect eyes. Yes your husband sees you, and I believe with those same eyes that I see my wife with.

  • Wednesday, November 3, 2010 at 9:44 pm

    Its tough having those heart wrenching emotions and feeling that way about yourself,, I hope it gets better and better for you,,, but on a lighter note,, Have you BEEN to a lot of strip clubs? More than likely, not to worry,, not trying to sound mean,, but there are a lot of mom and non perfect looking strippers out there,, and really,, i highly doubt there is actually a PERFECT body out there,, everyone has something wrong and something they would like to alter a tad. and you know what,, im SURE your hubby would much rather see you in a sexy teddy with YOU giving the lap dance,, strippers who?

  • Monday, September 3, 2012 at 8:43 am

    I know how you feel. I have now had two beautiful children but havent lost all my baby weight. I was in great shape before kids and now have a horrible body. Love handles, saggy boobs, cellulite and saggy butt. My husband has not been to a strip club since we’ve been together but has a lot before we met. I feel sick to my stomach knowing he has seen all those beautiful girls naked. It makes me not want him to see my body. I know it’ts not his fault he was a single man but it doesn’t change how I feel. I am always here to talk more about it!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *