30, one pregnancy and birth via Cesarean
I love my post-partum body. I basically look the same, with slightly bigger boobs and softer-rounder belly, with extra belly skin that I did not have before. My body is the constant reminder of the precious life I created, and for that, I am eternally thankful.
I used a belly binder almost 24/7 post-partum for about 4 weeks, I think that helped me get back in shape.
I delivered my baby via Cesarean after a 20 hour labour, I was lucky to be in minimum pain afterwards, I had a very speedy recovery.
Photos: before baby, 40 weeks, 6 days post-partum, 8 days post-partum, 2 weeks post-partum, 2 months postpartum
Congratulations! Some great genetics you have there :) Welcome to being a Mommy!!!
You are lucky! Be thankful! You snapped back into shape! Not everyone does. It is pure genetics my friend. If you had a belly full of stretch marks maybe you wouldn’t be so perky about your post baby body … Be mindful of others and feel blessed about your personal situation …
Thank you for sharing your story and for showing that pregnancy doesn’t have to “ruin” your body! You look wonderful – don’t let anyone make you feel guilty for that! Congratulations on your little one!
You look awesome! You are VERY lucky. I wasn’t even close to that lucky. Congrats on your baby.
Alice (the poster) did not say anything that should offend anyone. She simply stated that she loves her new body, and loves being a Mommy! MomOfFourUnderFive, she did not post this tho show that pregnancy doesn’t “ruin” bodies (harsh words by you by the way), she posted this to share her story like everyone else on here.
I’ve not been on this site in years, and STILL (!) there’s always someone looking to shoot down the woman who feels good about herself after giving birth. Honest to goodness, I don’t know how the site hostess puts up with the cattiness. If you are in pretty good shape, have a healthy BMI and – gasp!- didn’t get stretch marks, be prepared for the onslaught of remarks looking for any way to make you feel bad for inhabiting the body that your “genes” created or the one you worked your tail off for; or, had surgery on. Now, if you’re 50-100 lbs overweight, have stretch marks down to your toenails, and have a significant other who has done you wrong, you are the most beautiful thing to grace this blog. Why is that? Why the double standard? I think that it’s great that this website exists to represent real women – some who dramatically transform after birth and others who look barely changed at all. Physically, anyways. No woman is unchanged mentally, however, after becoming a mother. I wish women would get over themselves and realize that every woman, just like every birth, is different. You’ve got stretch marks? Who cares!? You’ve got a beautiful new human being who some women would give just about anything to have! Even a mess of stretch marks and 50 lbs. of extra weight and a 3 inch wide c-section scar. Sadly, there are plenty of those women who will never realize that dream that you get to change and feed and love when you’re not obsessing about your weight or the stretch marks that your husband, most likely, couldn’t care less about. So wear the bikini, or don’t. My guess is the person who only really cares is you. Your kids don’t. Those strangers at the beach don’t. Now, I’m going to go back to the bodybuilding forums with the guys quipping, “you look so ripped, dude! Good job. How’d you do that?” How refreshing.
Alice, you look lovely and I am so pleased that you are finding so much joy in being a new mom. Meredith, the reason the women who are 50lbs. overweight with head to toe stretchmarks and a crappy partner are told they are beautiful is because they are! They need support at a time when they don’t recognize their lives or their bodies. When a woman’s body changes drastically after giving birth society tells us they are no longer beautiful or worthy. And sometimes it takes a little bit of time and support to accept the changes and work up the strength to tell society at large to suck it. If Alice was suffering from crippling depression or her partner was a jackass there would be a flood of posts to support her. Her post was about her joy not looking for support from other posters so perhaps that’s why the responses don’t have the same tone as those directed at women who need help shoring up their self-esteem. One thing I do know about SOAM is this: if you need support you will get it. I often read posts from women who say that they had no idea what to expect after pregnancy. It has to be said that women like Alice are not the norm. There is nothing wrong with that but women who have no idea what might happen after giving birth need to know. Some women change a lot and some very little and first time moms need to know that they might change more than they expect. What no one needs is to be shamed for struggling to accept their new form. Stretchmarks we’re not a big deal for me but they are for others and I respect that it can be a struggle to be okay with these marks. It is not okay to minimize someone else’s difficulty accepting the changes in their postpartum bodies just because you think there is something worse. Those struggles are still valid even if there are greater struggles.
That’s a lovely response, Sara. <3
Sara,
I don’t disagree with you on some points, but I think some people do need some perspective. Stretch marks are not the end of the world. Furthermore, there are plenty of women walking around whose postpartum bodies haven’t deviated too far from the original. I see and work with them every day, so I guess we’ll have to agree to disagree on what “the norm” is. As I mentioned before, I really don’t believe there is one. What’s more, these women are mothers just the same and don’t deserve to be “fair game” when they choose to post. I see so many passive aggressive and blatant barbs directed at them in attempt to knock them down from “their perch.” I dont see this happening with the “down-on-their luck” gals. It’s pathetic and sad that women can be so venomous to other mothers regardless of what they look like. By the way, congrats, Alice! I’m so happy for you that you enjoy being a mother!
…and a final note: everyone is entitled to their feelings. Just so we are clear it is you, Sara, who has summarized from my response that infertility is “something worse” (to quote you.) That thereby infers that stretch marks and weight gain are something negative in and of themselves – what? Bad? I consider anyone with stretch marks, weight gain and a take home baby nothing but lucky. Please be aware how your words may, even inadvertently, perpetuate this culture of female self-loathing.
Your pregnant belly is SO adorable!!! I’m so happy you are finding motherhood and your new body something to enjoy! What a blessing! :) You look terrific!
You look so fit at 40 weeks! You go girl ;) I’m trying for #2 and hope I can pull off a fit pregnancy and get back in shape soon afterwards like I did with #1…but it’s been five years so we’ll see ;) This definitely motivated me not to give up and give in.
Meredith, you are twisting my words. I in no way implied that stretchmarks and weight gain are negative. What I did say was that there are many women who struggle to accept their bodies with extra pounds and stretchmarks. Those women may see those things as negative and struggle to accept themselves. I was talking about someone with a negative perspective about their postpartum body. I in no way inferred that I believe weight gain and stretchmarks are negative or ugly. It can take time, support and understanding for a woman to truly accept her new postpartum body. Perspective will come but not overnight. Your attitude seems very intolerant to those who don’t just “get over it” right away. Some do, some don’t. Those who’s don’t need a little extra love and kindness to get the perspective that allows them to move forward. I know many moms who have struggled with their bodies after pregnancy. Not one of those women has ever regretted having their child, nor have their body struggles ever been more important than the needs of their baby. Loving your baby and feeling blessed to have that new life has NOTHING to do with the struggles to accept a changed body. You can love your baby and not completely accept how you’ve changed. It doesn’t make you a bad person or a crappy mother. As far as a “norm” is concerned, yes there is an average. Perhaps average is a better word. Most women, likely about 90% or more don’t lose all the baby weight within the first three months and most women get a few stretchmarks and a little more sag to the girls! All these things are totally fine. Expected considering what the body endures. I know a lot of moms and they have all changed quite a bit. Understand that these are beautiful women in my eyes no matter how they’ve changed. I don’t live in a town full of supermodels so I think it’s safe to say that the bunch I’m talking about are a good representation of the average. I know only a few who have not been changed much by pregnancy. So, no, it’s not the average experience to walk away right after birth in your pre-pregnancy jeans without stretchmarks. Once again, there is nothing wrong with either scenario. It is what it is. However, women who don’t know what to expect need to know that they may have more souvenirs than they realize. They need to know because it will allow them to start gaining perspective as soon as possible if those changes will be an issue for them personally. Stretchmarks we’re not an issue for me because I knew I would get them. I got them during puberty. My mom got them during her pregnancies. I was prepared so by the time my son came I didn’t give a damn about the red marks. I must say that reading stories on SOAM really helped me to see stretchmarks in a different light. They’re beautiful to me in a way I didn’t see until I became a mother.
Why so nasty Meredith. If you have nothing good to say, say nothing at all! It sounds like your trying to put everyone else down. This website is fantastic, it gives mothers the chance to see that they are “normal”. Please don’t be dismissive of others feelings it’s not ones best trait!