A little different story (Toni)

My story’s a little different because I carry my scars not on the outside, but on the inside, where nobody can see them. I’ve always been a petite person and, because of my mom, was pretty much expecting the pregnancy I got. My mom is a very small woman who gave birth to 3 daughters and to this day has NO stretch marks. She’s still got the body of a woman in her 20’s, and she turns 50 this year. So I wasn’t at all surprised when I wore my pre-preg jeans home from the hospital and weighed 105 lbs. again at our two-week checkup. My breasts are now smaller than ever, but besides the underside of my breasts (because my poor little A cups inflated to a DDD in the days following birth), I don’t have a single stretch mark anywhere on my body. However, during pregnancy, I started developing REALLY bad IBS symptoms. I’ve always had mild intestinal problems and couldn’t eat spicy foods without getting a tummy ache, but during pregnancy, I started having absolutely horrible bouts of painful diarrhea any time I’d eat anything spicier than a cracker. It’s gotten so bad that now, 2 1/2 years later, EVERYTHING effects my bowels. I have to very carefully watch what I eat, and if I get chilly in the least, I’ll be on the toilet for an entire morning. I can’t even enjoy a cool spring breeze on my face without being sent to the porcelain throne. On top of the bowel problems, my joints ache all the time, I have a hip that constantly pops out of place, and the sciatica I fought with all through pregnancy still rears its sharp little head a few times a week. I didn’t even have an epidural or any drugs, but my lower back insists on aching any time I pick up anything over about 15 lbs…including my daughter. I feel like a whiner all the time, but with the combination of all these nasty little ailments, it sometimes feels like a burden to wake up in the morning. So yes, while it appears that pregnancy treated me quite well and I do have the body I did before I had my daughter, it’s quite a different story on the inside, and it’s very real pain that I live with every day.

16 thoughts on “A little different story (Toni)

  • Thursday, April 10, 2008 at 5:27 pm

    cute kiddo! love her hair. have you been checked out for fibromyalgia? you have many of the symptoms. check with your doctor. i have it and yoga has been the best thing for me. take care of yourself and thanks for sharing.

  • Thursday, April 10, 2008 at 7:19 pm

    I love the dye on you! and your little gal :D so precious! you look awesome – i’m sorry you have the ailments on the inside though :(

    ps I hope a lot of people don’t give you hell for saying “don’t dye babys hair” but it won’t hurt her ;] I love the dye on you! and your little gal :D so precious! you look awesome – i’m sorry you have the ailments on the inside though :(

    ps I hope a lot of people don’t give you hell for saying “don’t dye babys hair” but it won’t hurt her ;] <3

  • Thursday, April 10, 2008 at 7:40 pm

    Please get your thyroid checked!! You may not have to suffer!

  • Thursday, April 10, 2008 at 8:25 pm

    Love the hair!! Have you seen a doctor about all your ailments? I wonder if it’s even related to the whole pregnancy/child birth thing at all. I’m sorry to hear that you’ve been struggling so hard since having your daughter. I hope you can find some answers soon.

  • Thursday, April 10, 2008 at 8:59 pm

    Your post gave me a smile. At first I thought you meant that you were a different case because you’re not the typical “mom”. KWIM? Your daughter’s purple hair is (hehe) very cute! :D I think my MIL would die! ROFL! Your hubby/boyfie’s face on that one photo pointing at your belly is so cute lol! I’m sorry to hear that you suffer from so many ailments post pregnancy. :( Not even being able to hold your daughter… that must be really heartwrenching! My heart goes out to you!
    You had the cutest little pregnant belly. I loved that brighter shade of blue on you and the cut third photo down. It was very good looking on you.
    God bless you and your family. I hope that your body decides to kick back into shape next pregnancy… sometimes that happens. ;)

  • Thursday, April 10, 2008 at 9:39 pm

    Absolutely gorgeous photos! Beautiful mom and family. :) Ok, First off I’m into energy healing, its my profession so what I’m about to say may seem weird to you. I hope I don’t offend you. If you had or have had nipple piercings this sometimes messes with your stomach meridian. A lot of people who have them end up with stomach issues (like IBS), myself included. Secondly, do you get adjusted?? I have the same sciatic issue but I get adjusted and then massaged to put my back into alignment. The sciatic nerve can be pinched if your coccyx was pushed out when the baby was coming out during birth. I went all natural as well and this happened to me. I can’t say this is your problem but maybe its worth checking it out. I hope I helped you!

  • Friday, April 11, 2008 at 6:12 am

    I agree with the above post.. there is no reason you have to live in pain!! again I encourage you to go see your chiropractor too!
    Also Fennel tea is great for IBS, being a mother is hard enough..you should feel your best!

  • Friday, April 11, 2008 at 8:04 am

    Maybe a gluten sensitivity is causing your symptoms. AKA: wheat allergy, celiac disease, celiac sprue or gluten allergy. Do some research, see what you think. IBS is a diagnosis they give you when they don’t know what else is wrong! Tried acupuncture? Expensive but worth it. Find a student, they do it cheaper. Love the hair…super cute baby!

  • Friday, April 11, 2008 at 8:19 am

    Oh, I just noticed your boots in the first picture. I SO wanted those when I was a teenager. My mom talked me into the shoe version, though, instead of the boots. I always regretted it, but I loved them anyway. Gosh I miss those shoes. I grew out of them and had to let them go. Glow in the dark soles, yeah?

  • Friday, April 11, 2008 at 5:05 pm

    The pic I like most is the one of u guys together w/ u being hugged by your hubby…I like that one best and I feel u look really beautiful and happy w/ your life and so does your Hubby and Child. I luv the hair dye as well….looks cool . Thank You for sharing!! :)

  • Friday, April 11, 2008 at 9:55 pm

    I have fibromyalgia that worsened after pregnancy (I just received a diagnosis, and my kids are 6, 5, and 2) so I have some idea what you’re going through. Check out this website for young women dealing with chronic illness:


    A friend of mine has Crohn’s, so I was searching around and I just saw this article, too:



    That last pic of your daughter is great- love the hair! You’re both punk rock!! :)

  • Friday, April 11, 2008 at 10:11 pm

    Chiropractor! My husband is a chiro and I went to a woman chiro during my entire pregnancy and after. I have a mild form of spina bifada, a twisted uterus,,,you name it. It made the hugest difference in the world in my pregnancy and post-partum. If you find a good one they can certainly help your IBS, sciatica, back pain, etc.

  • Saturday, April 12, 2008 at 5:10 am

    I have read that during pregnancy our bodies start storing a lot of copper and it remains after the birth. Some women have excessive copper esp. women who took birth control pills, pregnancy, or are vegitarians (because they eat foods high in copper and don’t balance it with zinc that primarily comes from meat). Check out copper toxicity – most of your symptoms are listed on various websites. All you may need is to take some zinc and MSM until you balance your zinc/copper. t

  • Wednesday, May 14, 2008 at 7:30 am

    Helen, Lola, Natalie, Allison, Sandra: Thanks for all the advice, and I’ll check out those links. I’ve been reading up on all kinds of health issues like fibro and crohn’s and gluten allergies and all that lately. I’m not a vegetarian and I do take a daily multi-vitamin with zinc, but it’s still something I’ll talk about with my doc.

    Eryn: I’ve never had any piercings besides the ears, but I do believe in the power of “alternative medicines.”

    Sarah and Tasha and Carrie and anyone else: Thanks! ;) We’re a little “different,” but we’re a loving family. And hubby’s the awesomest daddy in the world…I feel blessed every day to have had his baby. We just celebrated our 4 year wedding anniversary, too! Hooray!

    Bonnie: Awesome! I loved those glow in the dark boots! I outgrew mine too though, darn it.

    And to everyone: We’re not planning on having any more biological kids…we’re in the process of adopting right now. We’re not doing it solely because of my health issues with the last pregnancy. It’s something I’ve always wanted to do and something we discussed before we even got married. So wish us luck with that, too! ;)

  • Thursday, October 14, 2010 at 1:09 pm

    What a great family!!! And Kudos to you on the adopting,, i would LOVE to do it as well,,Maybe in a few years time,, just had a daughter a few months ago,, our first child, so we’re just adjusting and enjoying!! Best of Luck to you!

  • Thursday, November 3, 2011 at 8:35 pm

    I just remembered this post from a few years back and thought I’d update for anyone who runs across it!

    I spent 4 years with those awful, debilitating IBS symptoms. At my worst, I got down to 93 lbs (a full 10 lbs lighter than I am now). I went to every doctor I could afford…took up yoga and fiddled with my diet; tried taking out meat, gluten, and other things that could potentially be triggers. Finally, someone recommended Kyo-Dophilus probiotics. Within a week of starting them, I noticed a DRASTIC decrease in my number of episodes, and by the end of 2 weeks, I wasn’t having any problems at all! I tried weaning myself off them a while back to see if I’d be okay and the symptoms started back up withing about a week and a half. Oh well…if these pills keep me healthy, I absolutely don’t mind staying on them for the rest of my life, if need be.

    And now, the little one is 6 years old and in Kindergarten!!! There’s still no #2 because this past spring, my husband was hospitalized and diagnosed with a rare genetic kidney disorder, so we decided to stop working with adoptions ’til we get his health back in order. He’s doing great on his medication, so we’ll just have to see what the future holds! :)

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