Sad But Not Giving Up Hope (Anon)

I’m writing to you all the from Jamaica. I’m 23 years old and 3 weeks 1 day postpartum. Maybe its too early for me to submit my story since I’ve not yet healed properly, but I just wna share my story.

Also, I must say that I read the stories of other strong beautiful mothers daily. Its very encouraging and helps me to embrace my body. So maybe my story will encourage you. My mother also encourages me a lot. She has 3 of us, when she was my age (23) she was done with kids. She is still suffering with her image and insomnia to this day. But no one knows unless she tells them. When she sees her children, all grown up, she says she’s nevr been happier.

I got pregnant December last year for my boyfriend of 2 yrs, I nevr wanted kids, I love my freedom, and loved my body even more. It made me, me. A confident individual. A bit too confident maybe. Before getting pregnant I was 137 pounds, 182 pounds at 39 weeks. I’m 5’5″. During my pregnancy I worried about stretch marks, the most, I rubbed my belly with olive oil and cocoa butter almost evry day. Initially, I had a small belly, at 6 months my fundal height was 13 inches. In just a few weeks my belly skyrocketed. At first they came on my sides. They were real small, and right before my eyes, they exploded. I thought I cud wrk with tht. But not on my belly please stay away. I also got them on my legs and calves. But not my belly.

I was happy that my chances of escaping stretch marks on my belly. At 38 weeks pregnant my doc said he’d induce me at 39 weeks. My baby’s head was in the birth canal, and could come at anytime, I lived abt 45 mins from the hospital, he didn’t want any accidents, so thts the reason I was induced.

I got home from my 38 week check up, laying in bed, my mom expressed shock, she saw lines on my belly, one more week to go, and they had to show up there ugly selves. I cried that night. I was crushed. Depressed. My mother comforted me, told me wen I have my baby I’ll appreciate it. I started having nightmares, because I was so deep in thought tht my bf may not want me any more. He nver liked big girls. I told him how I felt, told him my nightmares. He told me id be fine and should not worry. When he saw the marks, he laughed and asked me if that was really why I was behaving like that. It made me smile. He even bought me oils and creams tht would help get them off. I’ve not seen any improvements yet, but its just been 3 weeks. 6 days after giving birth I weighed 165 pounds.
My boyfreind tells me to be patient, and tht I’ll be fine. Even though my body won’t go back to normal, I’m now a mother, so I’ll hv a body thts considered normal for my new role in life.

I had a problem free pregnancy, smooth delivery. Painful, but worth evry second, I thank God.
I gave birth to a beautiful baby boy weighing 8 pounds 4 ounces on the 9th of september, 10 days before my 23rd bday, the 19-9. I love him so much, he has made me appreciate life so much more, he makes me smile evryday. I’m happy I have him. And evry one says he looks just like me.
I promise to keep u posted.

The first 3 pics: pre preggo
4th: day after delivery
5th: 10 days after delivery
6th: 11 days after delivery
7th: side stretch marks
8th: full body
9 & 10th: 2 weeks 3 days after delivery, belly up close
11th: my sweetie pie
12 &13: 38 & 39 weeks

Updated here.