I read this site as often as I can now, I have a very active 9 month old and I try to be out with him as much as posible, and i´ve been meanin to share something with you all.
When I was little I remember asking my mom if a pregnant woman went back to her shape right after the baby came out, and she said yes, right away so I imagined it like when you deflate a ballon, it just goes back. Little did I know it was more complicated that that, then I got pregnant and curious as to what really happens to your body and I came across this site, so I talked to my mom and tried to remind her about that time she had told me that all mommies bodies go back after having their baby, and her response was “I don’t remember, but how did you believe me seeing that I ended up so deformed” deformed, that’s what she thought of herself, to me she was always beautiful and I didn’t know her before I was born so how was I
supposed to tell the difference?
I also remember that she would complain about how fat she was when I was, lets say 5, then we would look at pictures of that time when I was 9 and she´d say “Oh God! I was skinny back there and I couldn’t appreciate it, now I´ve turned into such a cow” And what I have seen in most of these post is something like that, women who were not completely happy with their pre preggo bodies and that would now kill for them, I just have a little advice, if I may.
Woman: enjoy your body AS IT IS, down go moping over what it USED to look like, don’t wait until it is gone to appreciate it, it would be really sad if you took a picture of yourself today and not realizing how beautiful you are until you see it years from now. And this applies to everything really, I apply this mostly to my baby, I try to love every one of his stages because they aint coming back, it gets harder in some ways and easier in others. Also, your fear of how looking bad is not helping, you put yourself under a magnifying glass every time you look at yourself in the mirror, and you assume everyone else sees the same flaws you do, and you give your supportive husband such a hard time cause you don’t believe he doesn’t care about (or sometimes doesn’t even see) your stretch marks or all of those imaginary flaws, that’s a good thing, and heres a secret, most men don’t notice and if they do, chances are they don’t care, I´ve always thought that when you put make up on to look pretty for a husband, boyfriend, men in general the ones who notice it the most are women, now women may notice your flaws, but if someone tells you something you really shouldn’t give a damn, especially if you’ve got one of those rare unsupportive spouses who do, try to put them in their place or see if you can make it without them, I know being a single mom is hard and not a first choice but you
shouldn’t allow them to psychologically abuse you or bully you, is that the kind of thing you want around your kids?
And lastly, as an update, I finally found some stretch marks! I was 5 moths pp and right out of the shower I bent over to wrap my hair up in a towel and there they were, little silver lines that I can only see when there’s direct sunlight and strect my skin, They are way down in my belly so any two pice bathing suit would almost cover them up, also at 8 months pp I found some more higher, near my navel, and it’s the weirdest think, I am totally sure it wasn’t there before, I mean I could see something weird but it seemed to be under my skin, ever happened to one of you? Oh and my breasts get smaller I can feel their share of stretch marks, then after a while if I focus a lot and have very good lighting I can see a couple of them.
Anyways, this post was intended to be much more articulate, but as I mentioned I have a very active baby and I shouldn’t sit here typing any longer because he is begging me to go out. Don’t wait until its too late to appreciate and love your body, try to look at yourself through the adoring eyes of your partner and kids.