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Sad But Not Giving Up Hope (Anon)

October 21, 2011

I’m writing to you all the from Jamaica. I’m 23 years old and 3 weeks 1 day postpartum. Maybe its too early for me to submit my story since I’ve not yet healed properly, but I just wna share my story.

Also, I must say that I read the stories of other strong beautiful mothers daily. Its very encouraging and helps me to embrace my body. So maybe my story will encourage you. My mother also encourages me a lot. She has 3 of us, when she was my age (23) she was done with kids. She is still suffering with her image and insomnia to this day. But no one knows unless she tells them. When she sees her children, all grown up, she says she’s nevr been happier.

I got pregnant December last year for my boyfriend of 2 yrs, I nevr wanted kids, I love my freedom, and loved my body even more. It made me, me. A confident individual. A bit too confident maybe. Before getting pregnant I was 137 pounds, 182 pounds at 39 weeks. I’m 5’5″. During my pregnancy I worried about stretch marks, the most, I rubbed my belly with olive oil and cocoa butter almost evry day. Initially, I had a small belly, at 6 months my fundal height was 13 inches. In just a few weeks my belly skyrocketed. At first they came on my sides. They were real small, and right before my eyes, they exploded. I thought I cud wrk with tht. But not on my belly please stay away. I also got them on my legs and calves. But not my belly.

I was happy that my chances of escaping stretch marks on my belly. At 38 weeks pregnant my doc said he’d induce me at 39 weeks. My baby’s head was in the birth canal, and could come at anytime, I lived abt 45 mins from the hospital, he didn’t want any accidents, so thts the reason I was induced.

I got home from my 38 week check up, laying in bed, my mom expressed shock, she saw lines on my belly, one more week to go, and they had to show up there ugly selves. I cried that night. I was crushed. Depressed. My mother comforted me, told me wen I have my baby I’ll appreciate it. I started having nightmares, because I was so deep in thought tht my bf may not want me any more. He nver liked big girls. I told him how I felt, told him my nightmares. He told me id be fine and should not worry. When he saw the marks, he laughed and asked me if that was really why I was behaving like that. It made me smile. He even bought me oils and creams tht would help get them off. I’ve not seen any improvements yet, but its just been 3 weeks. 6 days after giving birth I weighed 165 pounds.
My boyfreind tells me to be patient, and tht I’ll be fine. Even though my body won’t go back to normal, I’m now a mother, so I’ll hv a body thts considered normal for my new role in life.

I had a problem free pregnancy, smooth delivery. Painful, but worth evry second, I thank God.
I gave birth to a beautiful baby boy weighing 8 pounds 4 ounces on the 9th of september, 10 days before my 23rd bday, the 19-9. I love him so much, he has made me appreciate life so much more, he makes me smile evryday. I’m happy I have him. And evry one says he looks just like me.
I promise to keep u posted.

The first 3 pics: pre preggo
4th: day after delivery
5th: 10 days after delivery
6th: 11 days after delivery
7th: side stretch marks
8th: full body
9 & 10th: 2 weeks 3 days after delivery, belly up close
11th: my sweetie pie
12 &13: 38 & 39 weeks

Updated here.

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7 Responses to “Sad But Not Giving Up Hope (Anon)”

  1. Jan Says:
    October 21st, 2011 at 9:39 am

    You look GREAT! You have already bounced back so well. Give it time and it will improve even more. Over time you will also learn to see your body as beautiful because of what it accomplished. It is an amazing thing to be pregnant and give birth. You will never look exactly the same as you did, but hopefully over time you will love your body even more than ever for what it did! Congratulations on your gorgeous son and keep up your wonderful attitude!

  2. becky Says:
    October 21st, 2011 at 2:59 pm

    Hello. Your belly did change but I still find it very attractive. I cant beleive picture 6 was only 11 days after birth. To me you seem to have the body that will bounce back. Maybe not exactly the way it was but you still already look great!! your right dont give up!!!! Enjoy your beautiful baby who seems to have more hair on his head!!!

  3. jackie Says:
    October 21st, 2011 at 5:30 pm

    hey you look fine mama trust me! .. it will all get better, just get in your daily activity and healthy foods and remember your baby boy was so worth it!! i have a post also “How can i love my new body” .. i had a boy too and i got stretch marks ALL over from loseing 30 pounds in 2 months from not eating hardly ever..
    i see you had some on your butt before pregnancy? i guess its really just normal.. i had some before too from growth spurt… we all cant be perfect.. but we gotta remember.. it could be so much worse always!

    stay strong

  4. Chocolatemommy Says:
    October 21st, 2011 at 9:27 pm

    I felt the same why when I first gave birth to my 8 lbs baby girl. I had the dark belly just like you and stretch marks all over my belly. You look good. TRUST ME it will all fade and look ten times better. It has been 11 months for me and the difference is dramatic. It is too early to tell right now.

  5. Sarah Says:
    October 23rd, 2011 at 10:39 am

    You have a really beautiful body! I love your pregnancy photos and I can’t believe that you’re only 3 weeks postpartum in your photos. You have such a perfect body. I’m a little jealous. :) Congratulations on the birth of your little one.

  6. Ann Says:
    October 23rd, 2011 at 8:27 pm

    You and your baby are beautiful. Don’t give up hope. I know how you feel and am of similar height and weight as you with my first child. My son was the same weight too! The weight will come off even though your skin doesn’t change much. It’s five years from my first child’s birth and I was having a down week about my own stomach. Thanks for sharing your story. You are not alone.
    Enjoy your baby boy. Time goes so fast.

  7. taiyo Says:
    October 25th, 2011 at 10:36 pm

    You are so beautiful! Congratulations on your baby.

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