I’ve struggled with food for a few years now. My struggle was mostly a secret and began two and a half years ago when I decided I wanted to lose weight for my wedding. I wasn’t overweight, but I wanted to look good. Long story short, I became obsessed, gained the weight back and then some, and then when my husband deployed September 2008, I decided to get in shape the right way. I lifted heavy, ate right, and got in the best shape of my life. I got pregnant a day or two after my husband got back, LITERALLY, so, for the love and health of my baby, I realized I needed to stop my OCD need to count every single calorie and gram of protein going into my body and just eat for health. By my 19th week of pregnancy, my doctor told me I had only gained 6 pounds. He seemed concerned, and I really took that to heart. By my next check-up, I had gained another 10 pounds. 10 pounds…..in one month! By that point, I was about 24 weeks pregnant and just started eating EVERYTHING. I only gained 40 pounds, but boy did I feel like I’d gained 100. My husband always thought I was beautiful throughout my whole pregnancy, but I felt like an elephant and I had a hard time adjusting to my changing body and to the life growing inside of me. The birth process was probably the most difficult thing I’ve ever gone through. I had read all these stories and had all these expectations……….but that really doesn’t prepare you for the real thing. My labor was about 14 hours and I pushed for an hour and 15 minutes. I had no drugs or an epidural. My husband was so encouraging and that really helped me push through the pain. My son was born October 15 of 2009 weighing 8 lbs 9 ozs. I remember as the nurses were checking on my son and the doctor was stitching me up, I felt my belly and how squishy and “fake” it felt. It didn’t feel like it belonged to me. I didn’t suffer from PPD, but I had a diffucult time realizing how much my body had changed. I was chubby and had stretch marks. I had gained a few going through puberty and had always been self-conscious of them, but I really wanted to be strong for my son. I started doing P90X about 6 weeks postpartum to lose my babyweight. I am now 5.5 months postpartum and my son is the light of my life. I love him so much it hurts and I’m amazed at the personality he’s developed already. He’s going to be such a beautiful and intelligent person. I still struggle with my body and how it looks now, but I’m so thankful for my happy, healthy baby. I miss my belly and my husband and I can’t wait to have another.
This is my first pregnancy and first live birth.
The pictures sent are me 6 weeks PP, 10 weeks PP, and me today (5.5 months PP).