Number of Pregnancies: 1
Number of Births: 1 amazing baby boy
(Almost) 6 months Postpartum
Let me start out by saying that I am so thankful to have found this website. I no longer feel completely alone in the way I look. Although I do still have my self-confidence issue, I know that others are feeling the same things as I am, and they are BEAUTIFUL women!
I found out I was pregnant just a few months before my eighteenth birthday. It was not a completely unplanned pregnancy, and although I was very shocked, I was overjoyed. Throughout my pregnancy I felt so beautiful despite my growing amounts of stretch marks. I had this beautiful belly and a beautiful baby boy growing inside of me. I truly felt the miracle of life.
On February 8th of 2010 I delivered my happy, healthy baby boy. He weighed 9lbs2oz and was 21.5inches long. It was love at first sight with my new baby. Unfortunately, I can’t say the same thing with my new body. When I looked down at my “bowl-full-of-jelly” stomach, I felt empty. Not just my stomach, but my self-esteem.
I now was full of stretch marks, and although I had a gorgeous baby to show for it, I hated my body, and I still do. I envy the women who have “come to terms” with their bodies, as they deserve to feel beautiful because they have done the most powerful thing a woman can do!! Giving life and then nourishing that life is amazing beyond words!
I know I should feel that way also, but when I look down at myself, all I see is disgusting stretch marks, a flabby tummy, saggy boobs (although I am still exclusively breastfeeding), and I can’t help but feel awful about it.
I hate this new body, and I hate the way I look. I used to love shopping, now going in to a store just depresses me as I know I will never find anything that will fit me, and now I have to try to hide this flabby tummy, arms, thighs, and hips. Also, being 19, I would love to wear shorts and even ANY swimsuit, but I barely have the confidence to do that.
I am covered in stretch marks from my breasts to my calves (and everywhere in between!), but I think (with help from all of you beautiful women), that I am VERY slowly starting to realize that this new body is not a burden, but the miracle that continues to give my child nourishment and life.
Thank you, ladies! You are all beautiful!!