Ashamed and Insecure (Anonymous)

25 years old one child, three months postpartum

In my early teens I suffered from purging anorexia. I’ve never been content with my body and looks since one summer my dad pointed out my growing belly when I was 12. I got the help I needed, but never got rid of that little voice that told me I could be more loved if I just lost a few pounds.

Looking back, I wish I had embraced the body I had before pregnancy.

My poor husband has had to deal with these crazy thoughts of mine and has paid the price. I never let him see me naked then or now. I feel terrible that I have held back from him.

Pregnancy weight gain and loss have brought back all the bad thoughts from my teen years. I’m trying so hard to not put emphasis on my looks, but it varies from day to day. I know that I never want my daughter to feel bad about herself or hear me put myself down. Each day it takes a real effort not to breakdown when I catch a glimpse of my body in the mirror.

7 thoughts on “Ashamed and Insecure (Anonymous)

  • Tuesday, August 7, 2012 at 8:49 am
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    U look AMAZING for three months p.p.!!! When I was a teen I was bulimic from 13 to 18. ( &still have the voice that still tries a drills that im nothing n wont be till im skinny skinny.) But then I realize & remind myself exactly what Im gonna share with you. Your soooo valuable! Think about it, theres NO ONE like u!! In the WHOLE world! Our awesome daddy above says that a woman is the CROWN of creation! That we are more ….MOOORE….. valuable then rubies and pearls! I think we as women are captivating!! ur beautiful!! I tell my little girl daily…. Ur such a beautiful beauty !!

  • Tuesday, August 7, 2012 at 10:35 am
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    wth??? You look awesome, your stomach is flat try being me with my ugly hanging belly i have to tuck my ugly hanging gut into my pants :( i WOULD TRADE WITH YOU IN A HEARTBEAT!

  • Tuesday, August 7, 2012 at 1:12 pm
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    You look great! And you’re only 3 months post partum! I’m sure your husband thinks you are gorgeous. You have no need to feel ashamed or insecure.

  • Tuesday, August 7, 2012 at 6:49 pm
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    You look great!!! I’m glad you took a picture at JUST 3 months pp because it’ll be easier for you to see the HUGE changes in your body over the next year. :) Trust me: a lot changes in the year to two years after you have a baby and absolutely NOTHING is written in stone.

  • Tuesday, August 7, 2012 at 8:45 pm
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    You look wonderful. I’m glad you had the courage to share your story and show your body. You’re only 3 months pp, I wish I had waited longer to post because I didn’t realise that my body would change more in the next coming months. My son is now 8 months and it’s a big difference than that i looked like 3 months postpartum.
    :)

  • Thursday, August 9, 2012 at 9:37 am
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    3 months pp!!! GIRL YOU LOOK GREAT!

  • Friday, August 10, 2012 at 7:23 pm
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    You look amazing!! I actually think your stretch marks look really cool, they look like they could be a tattoo. Just remember that your bad thoughts are just thoughts, they can’t hurt you and you are stronger than they are!

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