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(Anonymous)

May 7, 2014

I am a mother of 10 children. The last two being twin boys. My firstborn twin boy died in February this year aged 4 months. I would generally be the first to complain about my figure post childbirth. But my experience has shown me what’s important in life. I would gladly be a size 24+ if i could just hold my baby in my arms one more time. So ladies forget figures and love your babies… Most precious things to be focussed on.

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6 Responses to “(Anonymous)”

  1. Beth Says:
    May 7th, 2014 at 10:05 am

    It seems like you are invalidating/minimizing the body struggles the women here are experiencing. We can always compare our hurt and struggle to a greater hurt and struggle, but I question the usefulness of such an exercise. My experience is that it tends to draw upon the force of guilt/shame for having ever felt or still feeling the lesser hurt and struggle….as if we should not feel certain things because something worse is possible.

  2. MHD Says:
    May 7th, 2014 at 12:09 pm

    I am very sorry to hear about your loss. Your story puts life into perspective and defines what is truly important. Thank you for reminding us that there is vanity in our body struggles. While real and valid, perspective is the key to recognizing that excess tissue and stretch marks are not worth the time and attention that we give them. Society has minimized women to be a reflection of how we look and we accept that. What if we stopped spending our energy on hating ourselves and started investing it in counting our strengths and blessings? Rather than hating ourselves, we should take care of ourselves and strive to the best we can. When we love ourselves and live life to the fullest, we are open to life’s most precious blessings. I hope that through your struggles you are able to take care of yourself and heal. I wish you strength and may your future days hold joy.

  3. CS Says:
    May 7th, 2014 at 12:33 pm

    I am so sorry that you are not holding your baby boy. You must be feeling unimaginable pain. May I ask how he died? *Hugs* from a complete stranger, but hugs just the same.

  4. Senga Says:
    May 7th, 2014 at 2:05 pm

    So sorry to hear of your losses. Just heartbreaking. You are in my prayers.

  5. Marie Says:
    July 27th, 2014 at 5:16 am

    I am very sorry for your loss and know that there is absolutely nothing anybody can say to make it better. We lost our 3 month old daughter on July 29th of last year. My husband blames himself since he was watching her while I was at work. We have been blessed with two beautiful boys, who are now almost 5 and 3, and we are expecting our fourth at the end of August. We try our best to focus on the future, but the hurt never really goes away. I have read that Bonnie personally checks each comment, so I’m hoping that if you need anyone to just listen, who is going through a similar situation, that you ask her for my contact information and I will gladly have an open ear for you. I wish you all the love and support to help you see the beauty in the world every single day.

  6. Bel Says:
    September 4th, 2014 at 7:00 am

    I am sorry for your loss as well. I can relate in a way as no one experiences it the same way. I lost my firstborn, a son as well to SIDS. He was two months old. This month on the 28 would be his 2nd birthday. I went to work for the first time since before he was born and came home to him deceased. My husband was watching him. Took a nap while my son was in his own room napping as well. He woke up to check on my son and he was gone. The thing is my body helped me remind myself it was completely real. I felt as if my sons existance was a beautiful dream but my tummy reminded me otherwise everyday.. My body is beautiful, It birthed two children that are beautiful in everyway.

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