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11 months postpartum 20 years old (Anonymous)

November 10, 2008

I am a 20 yr old mother. I couldn’t have imagined that I’d be able to do this well as a mother before I had my son, but I always knew I’d do my best. I doubted that my best would be good enough, but I never knew at the time that it would come so easy when I felt that almost too-strong love I have for my son. I love being a mother and I wouldn’t trade that to have my body back, but this doesn’t change that I want to break down every time I look in the mirror. I always struggled with my weight, except RIGHT before I got pregnant. I finally reached my goal weight, and I was a size 6. From age 13 I had always fluctuated between a size 11 and 13. Then, I gained 80lbs during my pregnancy, and have lost 45 since. I stopped losing weight about seven months ago however, and can’t seem to get it started back up. Now I am left with this and I cant help but wonder how anyone can embrace their bodies when this is what it looks like. I don’t want to insult anyone.. that’s not my reason for posting.. I’m just jealous I guess. I wish I could accept this, and maybe even love it.. I just don’t see how it’s possible. I hate looking in the mirror. Most of the time I really take a good look at my stomach I can’t hold the tears back.




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11 Responses to “11 months postpartum 20 years old (Anonymous)”

  1. Sara Says:
    November 10th, 2008 at 2:51 pm

    Give yourself some time. I’m betting that your son is either already mobile or on the verge of complete mobility. Chasing after him alone will help you lose some of those last few pounds, but you are beautiful and powerful, and the more you can learn to love your new body, the better off you’ll be in the long run. Everyone’s body is going to change as we age, and you’re lucky enough to have a beautiful baby in exchange. Good luck, and congratulations on your son.

  2. Katharine Says:
    November 10th, 2008 at 9:46 pm

    I have the same belly as you! You look AMAZING, being only 11 months post partum…You’ve come a long way! And just look at how perky your boobs are still!!!! Lucky girl<3

    Just hang in there…I am 21 years old and 14 months post partum right now, and I’ve gotten stuck a couple of times also. The first time I got stuck I started a workout DvD when my kiddo’s took a nap, and it REALLY helped up my metabolism even though I did it only for a couple of months of doing it like 3 times a week. The next time I got stuck I cut out fast food (we ate out a lot), and currently I’m stuck and I think I need to workout but I can not find the time ever. So I’m eating lots of fruits, veggies, protein and of course lots of water…Hopefully that will get me going again.

    Good luck sweet pea, loving yourself takes time…Its something I am desperately trying to do also.

  3. Lucy Says:
    November 11th, 2008 at 3:33 am

    I feel exactly the same as you, I cant accept my body let alone love it! I am also stuck in my weight loss regime,I cant seem to lose anything! You have to look on the bright side, you still have amazing breasts. My breasts has gone to hell as well! Everybody says it takes time though and some people even take three years to recover from the “shock” of chlid birth. So I geuss we should just hang in there!

  4. LAQUANTRA Says:
    November 13th, 2008 at 3:16 pm

    I COMPLETLY UNDERSTAND WHERE UR COMING FROM. I AM 11 MONTHS PP FROM MY 2ND CHILD. I DONT PAY ATTENTION TO MY WEIGHT LOSS BUT IM ALMOST BACK TO MY WIEGHT FROM PP OF MY 1ST BORN. BUT MY BIGGEST ISSUES ARE THE LOOK OF MY PP BODY. IN MY CLOTHES I LOOK JUST OK. BUT I WALK AROUNGD FEELING LIKE I HAVE A HUGE SECRET IM HIDING. I MORDIFIED TOO WALK AROUND MY HUSBAND WITH NO CLOTHES ON. I CRY EVERYTIME I LOOK AT MY POST BABY PHOTOS. I TRY TO STAY POSOTIVE BUT ITS HARD KNOWING I’LL NEVER LOOK LIKE ME AGAIN.

  5. Temika Says:
    November 13th, 2008 at 11:20 pm

    Hi There,

    I COMPLETELY understand you. I am a 22 year old first time mother and I also cant hold the tears back when I stop and look at myself. Eeveryone tells me “ahh, in time you learn to accept yourself and how you are” or “but you have a beautiful baby so isnt it worth it?!”. I am very happy to have a healthy baby and I love him to bits, but I just dont feel like I’ll ever feel ok about how I look now and my tummy especially. How do we (those of us who feel this way) ever move on to feel sexy and confidant again..? :-(

  6. Vegmomma Says:
    November 14th, 2008 at 6:35 pm

    I am 23 and although I don’t really have any stretch marks or saggy belly, I still feel bad when I look in the mirror. My breasts are sooo different now, esp. with breastfeeding 2 babies. I know I have no real reason to feel this way but I do. I want to lose the last 15lbs so bad, even though I’m only 3 months pp. At least my husband loves the way I look. I should learn from him. I’ve given him 2 children :)

  7. Kathy Says:
    November 15th, 2008 at 7:27 pm

    You have a beautiful hour glass shape! No matter how much weight you lose, you arent going to lose that. Its time to start embracing it! I think you are beautiful and I hope you start to see yourself that way, too.

  8. Natalie Says:
    November 15th, 2008 at 8:41 pm

    I had my son 3 and a half years ago.. and three of those years I was depressed and hated my body and just in the last 3 months I have been able to get back down to what I weighted pre- pregnancy.. 143. It took lots of hard work and positive energy. Get positive start telling yourself you love yourself, it will go along way, and start working out. You’ll get there. Hopefully a hello of a lot faster then I did. :) Good luck!

  9. Claire Says:
    December 11th, 2008 at 1:55 pm

    I understand! I’m a 24 year old first time mom and I have the same stretch marks you do. It’s so hard looking back at old pictures and not appreciating what I had. My son is now 11 months and I have learned to accept my body and the gift I have been given as a result. Being a mom is such a gift, and I am so happy that I am able to experience it. There are so many people out there who would lose a limb to get pregnant! I am trying to accept my body and make all of the changes I can on my own. You look beautiful by the way and you will eventually look the way you want!

  10. Libby Says:
    December 13th, 2008 at 9:32 pm

    I know that it probably doesn’t help much to have a bunch of people tell you you’re beautiful. I never helped me. I have had two children and when i delivered my second I was 178 lbs and 5 ft 3. A lot of that came off in the beginning but I ended up stuck around 150. I don’t lose weight until after I stop breast feeding so when i stopped I dropped a few more pounds but I still wasn’t happy. My husband and I were planning a trip to Belize for our 10 year anniversary and I wanted to look descent in a swimsuit so I stopped complaining about my weight and joined a gym. I am not implying that you are complaining only that I did. I started counting and recording every single calorie on Calorie Count Plus and I went to the gym every night after the kids were in bed and I worked out for 1-2 hours. I was able to drop 20 pounds but sadly the saggy tummy is still there. But I want you to know that if you make the effort, cut your calories and really exercise you will get to watch the inches fall off. I have always struggled with my weight but this was the first time I have ever been able to lose what I wanted and keep it off. So I say go to the gym!!! you will feel better and counting the calories really teaches you appropriate servings, snacks etc.

    I wish you luck!

  11. Elizabeth Says:
    January 16th, 2009 at 6:26 pm

    I’m going to be 35 this year and I had two children within the last 2 and a half years. I’m presently 2 months postpartum and i am miserable about my weight. I lost 30 pound within two weeks of the delivery and then I remained stuck at 180 pounds and the scale just wouldn’t budge no matter what. I can’t say I ‘m exersizing much but I will be. I just want to say that I understand how you feel and my advice to you is not to just accept it and feel good about yourself the way you are feel good about your hard work to get it off because you can and I’m sure you will. I get so tired of people telling us what we want to hear so we don’t feel bad about ourselves. I certainly don’t want you to fel bad because your breasts are certainly perkier than mine. Mine may need surgery! But I want to encourage you as I am encouraginging myself to exersize I’m also trying weightwatchers with exersize, I’ve had success with it my previous pregnancy.

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