NICU

My Miracle Baby (Anonymous)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Child Loss, Complications in Pregnancy, NICU, Preemie, Pregnant, Second Pregnancy, Submissions 3 Comments

I started college in the fall of 2007 where I met my wonderful fiance and my life was going really great. I started dating him in August of 2007 and became pregnant in September. I panicked and sought out to my roommates to figure out what to do. One of them suggested to take vitamin c every hour because it supposedly caused a woman to miscarry. I was so very desperate and so unprepared that I decided to do it. I ended up losing the baby and I never told anyone else besides those girls about that experience. I was devastated, but quickly got back to doing well in school and trying my best to abstain from sex. I was hurting so much inside that it made me physically ill thinking about what I had done. I didn’t understand why on earth I would do something like that to an innocent being. It proved to be one of the many challenges that semester. I ended up getting mono, and my boyfriend broke up with me which was more than I could handle. About two weeks later, we got back together and everything seemed fine. Our relationship had a pretty rocky start and by february 2008, I was pregnant again. I was thinking of the horrible decision I had made before and I promised myself not to ever do something like that again. I decided to keep my baby and my fiance stood by my side every step of the way. It was not easy, but I was determined to get through it. I had a huge support system from my family, my fiance, and my fiance’s family. I was 140lbs when I got pregnant and the day before I had my daughter I was 187. I had never weighed that much in my entire life. I missed being 140lbs because that was the time when I felt amazing about myself! I want that back so badly!

I was due November 14, 2008 with my daughter, but had her October 9th due to complications with toxemia. My b/p was 160/110 and the protein level of my urine reached 7,000 from 1,200 three days prior. I couldn’t believe it! I was 34weeks 6days when she was born. She weighed 4lbs 13ounces and was 18in long. She was in the NICU for 13 days before I got to bring her home. It was the hardest thing I ever had to go through. I spent every day in the hospital with her and held her for as long as I could. I didn’t even get to see her until 2 days postpartum. I cried when I was discharged and I could not bring my little baby home with me.

I think back to my miscarriage and while I feel the deepest regret for what I had done, I can’t help but feel thankful too that if I had gone through with the first pregnancy, then I would not have my beautiful baby girl.

She is now a healthy 2 month old. She is the most amazing person in the world and I love her so much.

Funny story about her name…I LOVE Jon and Kate Plus 8, and I was so drugged up(heavy meds after a c-section lol!!) when the birth recorder came by to get her name that I named my daughter after 2 of Jon and Kate Gosselin’s kids…Madelyn Alexis Faith.

Hahaha.
Oops!
Well, Madelyn was picked out waaay before I saw the show so that is okay :)

I do not have any belly pictures on this computer, but I do have some pre-pregnancy pictures, hospital pictures, and some pictures of Madelyn!




7 Days pp after 1lb 13 oz micro preemie @ 26 5/7 weeks (Ashley)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Child Loss, First Pregnancy, NICU, Piercing, Postpartum, Preemie, Submissions, Tattoo 14 Comments

These are the pictures taken tonight, exactly one week after the birth of my first, Gunner Isaiah @ 26 weeks and 5 days. He was a micro-preemie and weighed 1 lb 13 oz and was 13.25 in. long. I had a normal pregnancy right up until I went into labor. I was thick before pregnancy and gained 10 lbs total. You can see in the pics that my navel piercing scar stretched a great deal. My unfinished tattoo on my ribs was not affected at all. Pumping so that I can eventually breastfeed has started to cause stretchmarks on my breasts, but other than that they look AMAZING! I am loving how big they are right now. :) The old stretchmarks I had on my hips and thighs had just started to extend, but it’s barely noticeable in the pictures. In a lot of ways I envy the moms who have stretchmarks to show. Since my son is in the NICU, the only physical indications that I even HAVE a baby are the hospital bracelets I refuse to take off. I would have rather had my whole lower body covered in stretch marks than have my son so early.





3 Months After 10lb 10oz Baby (Berni)

Bonnie (SOAM) Belly, Breasts, Cesarean, First Pregnancy, NICU, Postpartum, Submissions, Update 17 Comments

I’m 18,I live in London England with boyfriend of 2.5 years. I recently had my first baby, a boy I named Caden. I had a traumatic labour, I had an emergeny c section, after my baby became distressed. He had opened his bowels whilst still in the womb and swallowed the poo. He didn’t breath for 4 min after he was born and he was whisked off to intensive care. Caden spent a week in SCBU. If this wasn’t bad enough the staff would rude and not vert helpful. I was never told if he was going to be OK, when we were likely go home, if he proggressed. On day two I was offered the chance to hold him and I hesitated (I was scared because all the tubes wires etc) the nurse made it very clear she thought I was an awful mother. Caden made a rapid recovery pulling out his breathing tubes and refusing to have them put back in the nurses relised he was breathing by himself.After that he never looked back and everyday got better until day 8 we were allowed home. I’m 5’8 and put on about 50 lbs during my pregnancy ( 10lb 10 oz was Caden lol) I lost about 43 pounds by the tim e he was 3 weeks old. However I’ve been left with a saggy tummy and stretchmarks.I also breastfed for the first 3 weeks and now my boobs are saggy and empty. Sometimes I’m ok with this but other days it upsets me. I completed my A levels when my son was 2 weeks old and plan to go to uni to study Fashion journalism next year but don’t know if I’ll feel comfortable around loads of fashionistas with my new mummy body. I also dabbled in modelling before I had my son and think thats another reason I find it hard to accept my new body. But I know my body did a great thing by carying my 10lb 10 oz beautiful boy.But I won’t be wearing a bikini anytime soon!! ( I think the pics don’t show the true extent of the damage – it looks better in pic(not sure why) )






Updated here, here, and here.