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I found the story of the mom who did not know she was pregnant very interesting. I have the same sort of story, but mine is a bit different.

It was mid February 2004 and my period had been missing for 3 months. I went back to the doctor, and of course she asked me if I was pregnant. “No” I said “I tested” so she decided to check and get a blood test done. Sure enough when I came back the beginning of May, it was negative, even though I told her I was exhausted and gaining weight, despite not changing my eating habits. She told me my hormones we so low that I couldn’t even GET pregnant. However, the hormone prolactin, usually only seen in nursing mothers, was very high. This could mean I had a certain type of brain tumor, so I had to go for an MRI.

I had been doing home pregnancy tests every couple of weeks for several months, simply because I wasn’t getting my period and thought it was best. They were always negative. My Mom said she wanted me to get an ultrasound before the MRI, since she had many problems in the past with ovarian cysts and other things. So I got one scheduled for Monday, May 31st, 2004.

The weekend before, my stomach had been bothering me. The oddest sensation- like I could feel myself getting fatter- I had stretch marks! Still, negative tests, and the doctor did say it wasn’t possible for me to be pregnant.

Monday came, and I went to the ultrasound- by myself, because everyone had to work… and no one expected what we found. I got really mad at the technician- she saw my belly and asked me right away if I was pregnant. I told her the story so far, and she just said “okay, get up on the table then”

I wasn’t even looking at the screen. Then I heard, “Um, Kerri? There IS a baby here- and it is about 21 weeks along” I quickly did the math in my head.. “What??….You mean.. I am over 5 months pregnant???” I said. “Yes, you are”

This is what he looked like that day. Also, a picture of him at exactly one week.

We only had 4 and half months to prepare. I was only 23 and completely not ready for all this. I had been on the pill.. I only went off the pill because my doctor had told me to (back in November), that the hormones were what was disrupting my period. I was worried because I had done so much heavy lifting- all these things you shouldn’t do when you are pregnant. Good thing I don’t drink or smoke, or have any really bad habits!

At first I was really angry and blamed the doctor. I missed almost my entire pregnancy- she told me I might have a brain tumor! What was I going to do? We were supposed to be moving across country in just a couple months. We couldn’t now, I would be nearly 8 months pregnant!

In the end, all my friends and family helped us get everything ready, and the parents of the kids I taught were amazing (I was teaching in a preschool) They brought me maternity clothes, baby clothes, baby seats, everything. I don’t know what I would have done otherwise.

Anyway, the point of my story is, when someone tells you “They didn’t know” Don’t look at them like they must have just been stupid. I ‘KNEW’ I was pregnant from almost the beginning- but I kept hearing it was impossible, over and over, and all those endless negative tests and blood tests. What would you REALLY have thought? You would probably assume it was impossible then, as I did.

My new doctor knows this story. If I ever miss a period for over a month, and if I even suspect, I will be going in for an ultrasound. I am glad that this doctor believes me. Some people still assume I was just in denial.. but they don’t take into consideration all that happened and how they would feel.

My son turns 2 on Tuesday, October 17th, 2006. He is the love of our lives- even if he is trouble sometimes!

My twins are now 14 months old, but I remember well last summer and feeling like a float in the Macy’s Parade!

It took us years and many, many procedures to finally get pregnant, so I didn’t really have anything to complain about – I’m proud of the pregnancy body I had, and while I wish there was something I could do about the saggy skin, I was never a waif to begin with :).

I love all of my belly pix…and love this site. Well done!! This is a club I’m proud to be part of.

August 3, 2005 35w1d Belly Shot Little do I know that my twins are going to make their entrance into the world 10 days after this photo is taken.

August 3, 2005 – 35w 1d Side shot, same day…wow, I look huge but never felt it!

4 days before my son and daughter enter the world. The dog thinks my belly is comfy to lay on. I love this picture.

4 days pre-babies. The stretch marks you see here are almost completely gone now. Though WOW I have got some saggy belly skin left behind. And then I look at my kids, and I could give a shit, serously!

These pictures are of my body 2 years 3 months after having my son. I was soo ashamed of my body until I found this website. Thank you. I don’t feel alone anymore.

Agi wrote her own entry awhile back here on her blog, and you can check out Emily’s photos here. Thanks, ladies!

I’m back in town again and will get to putting up all the submissions I have – there are lots, so keep checking in!

For now, though, here’s an important video from Dove’s Campaign for Real Beauty. It focuses on the face, not the body shape, but you get the idea and I don’t think there’s a real line to draw when it comes to how we feel about our physical bodies – we pick ourselves apart no matter what part it is.

And, it might be old news to a lot of you, but I found this article about Victoria Beckham very interesting and I wish more celebrities would be so honest.

Your blog has shown me a new reality- that women who don’t fit the ideal of the perfect, round, flawless-skinned pregnant belly are just as much mamas as others. Seeing the posts of other bigger mommas on this site has really made me feel so much better about my own body, especially my pregnant body- and knowing that other women of size are showing off their beautiful bodies here inspired me to do so as well, in hopes that maybe my story will help someone else realize that we’re ALL perfect and beautiful, no matter how deep our stretch marks or how wide our birth scars.

At 18 years old, I gave birth to my beautiful baby girl, Juliet, by C-section at 36 weeks.I went through that pregnancy as an obese woman. I didn’t look obviously pregnant but for the few weeks before she was born. I had never been a thin girl, or even close to average- I gave birth at well over 200 pounds (but had only gained a pound my whole pregnancy.) I lost 50 pounds within days of having her, and was left with a saggy, pale, muscle-less mess of a stomach. I felt disgusting- even allowing my then-boyfriend (now husband) to check my incision for me every day was awful. I felt ugly and destroyed.

As time went on and every attempt I made to make the saggy stretch-marked mess disappear failed miserably, I came to a realization. I was BEAUTIFUL, I was a GODDESS. My stretch marks are not scars, they are symbols of the beautiful relationship I had with my little girl while she lived inside of me. My Cesarean incision was not a badge of shame, it was a badge of honor- the honor of bringing life into this world, no matter how it came to be. Slowly, as a mother, I shed the body image issues that had plagued me for years.

After marrying my husband and another pregnancy that ended in miscarriage, I found out I was pregnant on my 20th birthday. Two weeks later, I found out I was carrying twins. And then I found this website. Instead of being ashamed of the stretch marks like last time, this time I’m proud and happy. They are proof of the life I hold inside of me, the life that all mothers have been privledged enough to hold- an experience all the more important to me after experiencing a pregnancy loss.

When I see woman distressed over their stretch marks, or dieting obsessively to lose the “baby weight,” I just feel sorry for them. Learning to love the body that has born one beautiful child and is currently cooking two more has been the most amazing, enlightening experience I could imagine, aside from being a mother itself. I’m finally comfortable as a person in my own skin, because I’m a Mom. I found my first new stretch marks today, and honestly, I was elated to see them!

To the other plus size mamas out there- keep posting. As this website so wonderfully proves, you are amazing, beautiful goddesses, and sharing your story will keep that word circulating!

My photos:
19 weeks with twins- clearly visible stretch marks, which are “old” ones from my first pregnancy.

Hairy belly- another interesting aspect of pregnancy

13 weeks, saggy mama breasts and all.

Thank you for the opportunity to share!

Hi,
I know my story is totally different than all your guys. I was 19 and working full time doing anything and everything that a person who was pregnant should not be doing. The only difference is that I DID NOT KNOW that I was pregnant. Hard to believe but… honestly totally true. I didnt know I was pregnant until August 3 2004 I woke up on the Friday and had my period (I had my period my whole pregnancy ontime and regular) and I was crampy of course. took some tylenol cramps went away then by Monday the cramps were getting really bad again so took some more tylenol went to bed woke up at 3 that morning had a bath because the cramps were HORRIBLE didnt work tried to go back to bed wasnt happening I was scheduled to work lucky for me parent owned business told my dad ya I might be a little late wasnt feeling good anyways cramps were getting worse had know idea what was going on told my mom we need to go to the hospital right Now!!! Went to the hospital got there around 8 sat in Emerg for 2 hours the doctor comes is and says your pregnant and you might be in labour but you knew you were pregnant (DR. was an ASS!!) any was had an ultrasound yup pregnant and in labour OMG!!! I was crying and FREAKING out my mom and my one sister were with my they call my other sister she comes over my grandma and my aunt who was visiting comes to the hospital to see how I was feeling so they are all in the delivery room and 2 hours later I have a son 7lbs 10oz. this story is hard to believe I know but true. Anyways Reid is now 2 and healthy as a horse has been sick once his whole life and is very intelligent so I couldnt have asked for anything better, I am the luckiest person to have him, I thank god every day that he is happy and healthy. I am so thankful that his father who has been my boyfriend for 6yrs now is awesome and everyone is so supportive. Just wanted to post my story and I love reading all the other stories around although I “missed” being pregnant I wouldnt change the outcome for the world.

Thank you to everyone who writes in this site its wonderful..
hugs

I missed this one the first time it was sent to me and I’m SO glad Jen decided to check up on it. This is amazing and moves me beyond words. Thank you, ladies, this has become my all-time favorite entry!

A Different Aspect of Motherhood: Sisterhood

Louisa:

During an evening of Mamas only hi-jinks and a few strategically placed libations My mama friends and I were inspired to create this class picture. We are all of us mothers, some of us three times over. We have all of us birthed everyway under the sun, some of us nursed our babies for years, others for weeks, some not at all. We are students and professionals, Christian and Buddhist and Pagan. We are lovers and wives and partners and proud single women. The playgroup we created so our babies could play together grew to become a place for us to gather in sisterhood. And several years later this is the amazing result. We had so much fun taking these photos. It was healing and liberating and bonding and wonderful. Im proud and honored by the women standing with me in this photo.

Emily:

When asked to pose for this pic my first thoughts were “Have we all gone completely mad?” Once I got over my “taught by society” body insecurities I was excited. When have that many women with post pregnancy bodies all been so bonded in sisterhood that we all can walk around with our stretch marks and cellulite hanging out? Hey, I don’t even get that naked in the locker room at the gym. I am honored to be included in this picture with the strongest, kindest, most supportive women in the world. We are all working to make a difference in this world even though it may not be on an Angelina Jolie scale, there is something to be said for just trying to raise good people. That task is more difficult and daunting than I ever imagined it to be. As I struggle to make my children feel secure through a sad divorce I remind them that there are many, many people who love and support us. We are truly blessed to be a part of this mama empowered group without whom I might not have the strength to get out of bed and face another day. Much love to all my beautiful sisters.

Mel:

I posed because I wanted to send a pic to Shape of a Mother anyway and it was definitely more freeing to do it with a group of other women. It was helpful for me to see that we all had post baby bodies. I am almost 30 and I feel like at some point I have to embrace my body stretch marks, fat and all. Life is too short to spend time wishing you looked like all the fake bodies in Hollywood . That picture is what real women look like and I am proud to be a part of it. It was nice to be half naked and vulnerable in front of women whom I have grown to love and feel accepted and loved back.

Libby:

for me, posing ‘nude’ wasn’t exactly a huge issue, but the fact that I was surrounded with a group of beautiful mothers added not only a bit of self-confidence but also reminded me of the empowerment of not only childbirth but being a mother as well. Having a group of friends who are all different in their own ways but sharing something so special is priceless.

April:

This is the power and beauty that comes from the knowledge that you are part of a wonderful culture, a culture of mommies. I would never have submitted a picture on my own, most likely because I wouldn’t have felt that I struck important enough of a pose, that I had nothing so significant to offer. But these ladies lift me up, validate fears, offer shoulders to cry on, impart words of wisdom that make all the difference in a time of need, pass no judgement on my beliefs and provide opportunity to celebrate our stretch marks, swinging breasts, and soft tummies. They laughed at my concern when tons of my hair fell out post-partum, they drove me home and held my hair back the first time I had alcohol since before I was pregnant, they talked me through my labor and delivery making my second birth successful and empowering, in spite of a full medical staff. They are standing by me, behind and in front of me, surrounding me with support as I am separating from my husband and learning to be a single mommy and somehow always come to the rescue for a babysitting emergency. They taught me to not be afraid of pain, whether physical from a non-medicated birth, or emotional from a rocky marriage. These women are my sisters, neighbors, teachers, confidants but most importantly, my friends my family. With these women I feel strong enough to proudly display my body made beautiful by creating 2 babies, one by epidural, one unmedicated but induced, both breast fed, both amazing.

Jen:

Since posting pictures and my story on Shape of A Mother had been on my todo list for the last three months, when the opportunity presented itself after several drinks with many of my amazing mommy friends, I didnt have to think twice. As a matter of fact I think my expression went something like, that is the best idea I have ever heard! I was ready to take my clothes off at that very moment.

I could go on about this forever, but Ill try to make it quick and not too sappy. Motherhood has provided me with a gift I could have never imagined. Motherhood has offered me a chance to really know, respect, and love other women. I met all of these women in one way or another through the experience of motherhood. We are different. We come from different backgrounds, even different countries. Some of us have home births, some of us have c-sections. Some of us breastfeed for 2 years, some of us cherished the bottle from Day 1. We have different incomes and different lifestyles. Some of us have good marriages, some of us are single moms. We have different religions, and different political ideas. Some of us are tall, some of us are short, some of us have small breasts, some of us have huge breasts. But regardless, we are all proud, strong, self-willed, intelligent women. We support each other in this distinctive experience. Beyond, the indescribable effect of a child in your life, this picture offers a representative of another element of motherhood. I love my friends, they are true friends. They are invaluable.

Hi,

I’d like to be listed as anonymous, and not have my pictures used anywhere but for the purpose of this site, please. ;) You can share my story and the pictures on your website, though. Just please don’t list my name or use the pictures anywhere else. Thanks so much.

Story:

My kids are ten and six. Before I had my son, I weighed 115 pounds (eek – but I was nineteen). When I went in to deliver him, I weighed 198 pounds. That’s my heaviest weight. I didn’t think the stretch marks would ever go away.

When I had my daughter, I weighed about 145. When I went in with her, I was somewhere in the 180’s (I didn’t pay as much attention the second time around – it didn’t seem as important ;)

My weight now is 153, and I’m working on losing another ten pounds or so, which is a healthy weight for me. My stretch marks are mostly on my upper thighs, and they’re almost invisible. I have a few on my breasts, but nothing too much.

I’m usually okay in my clothes. I feel confident, etc. But when I’m undressed, I feel very insecure. I’m constantly sucking my stomach in – I think you can see the “suck-in” line on one of these pictures! I decided to take these wearing my jeans because that’s what hangs over the edge and makes me most uncomfortable.

Luckily, my husband doesn’t care one whit, and tells me I’m sexy. I never believe him – but I’m trying to get to that point.

Thanks for making this site – it’s such a relief to see women like me.

Thank you thank you thank you. :)