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The story written in your skin.


Do you remember about a year ago when this manifesto I wrote was published on GrokNation? It’s a culmination of the lessons I’ve learned here with you all over the years. It’s about how your skin is your Story, your memoir, the record of your life written on you. We want to be mark-free/society tells us we must want to be mark-free, and we must be mark-free. But it is as we move through our life that our story is written and we learn lessons and gain wisdom along the way. The old crone, the wise woman, she is covered in lines and marks and they symbolize her status as leader and grandmother. For us to want to avoid marks is for us to avoid becoming her; it is for us to remain naive and inexperienced. And that, of course, allows us to remain easy victims. No one fucks with the wise woman.

This is what I hope for us, that we come to see the beauty in our lines and our marks. They aren’t a blemish, they are a memory, a plot line, a story. To see the beauty here is a revolutionary act, throwing off the chains of the beauty industry that keeps us insecure enough to line their pockets.

But more than that, I hope that we can find ourselves to be worthy just as we are. You are worthy even if you have five more pounds to lose. You are worthy if you have 300 more pounds to lose. You are worthy if you have no plans or desire to lose weight at all.

You. Are. Worthy. Just. As You. Are.

We are working on publishing a zine focused on body image. We hope to have the first issue ready by the end of the summer. We will be looking up local (San Diego) places to place them, and we will be mailing them out to anyone who chooses to subscribe. The first issue will be free, after that we may change a small fee, or donation, to cover costs. We are so excited! If you are interested in subscribing, or if you know of a place local to you who would be willing to have our zine available/for sale, email me at theshapeofamother@gmail.com. Just put “ZINE” in the subject. And then also be patient with me because I am terrible at life and sometimes I don’t check my email regularly.

I hope that our zine, like this website, helps spread the body-positive to new people and helps more people learn to love themselves.

And if you’d like to join us here in our online space, consider sending in your own story.

Categories: My Own Ramblings, News

Join Us!

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Help support SOAM and parents around the world by submitting your own photos and/or story here. Not only does sharing your story help to show the world what a postpartum body looks like, but it also helps to keep this website going and active and that helps keeps us able to do the work we do in the world. Also? Speaking your truth, even if it’s hard, can be life-changing and freeing. You are safe here at SOAM because I screen every single comment (although there isn’t much to decline to post because almost everyone here is supportive) and because you only share what you are comfortable with. Your name can remain anonymous and you can choose what combination of story and/or pictures you feel comfortable sharing.

Go to theshapeofamother.com/participate for directions on submitting and share this post with your friends. Help keep SOAM going!

Categories: My Own Ramblings, News, Positive Body Image/Words of Enouragement

Happy Birthday to SOAM!

This week marked TWELVE! years since I sat down and opened up SOAM while my big kid napped and my baby nursed. I can’t believe how time has flown! The internet, the world in fact, is a wildly different place than it was 12 years ago. We have made some leaps forward in terms of body positivity, and taken steps back in some ways. We still have so much work to do. I am slowly but surely working on moving to the next stage of SOAM’s work in the world.


Today I make a soft presentation of our new logo, created with love by Secret Agent Josephine. In the next few weeks we will be updating the website with the logo and getting a shop for SOAM merchandise up and running.


Our other summer project is to get our first issue of our zine published! We will also be having more community events and discussion groups so if you are in SoCal spread the word and keep your eye open for events in your area!

I can’t wait to see what this next year brings for SOAM! If you haven’t shared your story with us yet, consider doing so at theshapeofamother.com/participate and in the mean time tell everyone you know to follow us on Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter!

Categories: My Own Ramblings, News