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C-Section Mama, Married 6years to my BFF

I was 23 when I got pregnant. Being a very short and active young adult, I’ve always been a wild one at heart. My favorite joy is dancing. I love to just turn the music on and have fun! That was me before pregnancy.

Now I’m 24. I’ve had my first baby. I’m 3 months postpartum and I still don’t feel like that girl again yet. Somehow she’s me – but somehow she’s somebody else. Anyone feel that way? I know many have, but I have never in my life struggled to feel myself. I’ve always felt confident in my own skin. Sometimes I felt too skinny or non-curvy but… when I had my son… I suddenly felt foreign. I feel my tummy and it’s foreign. I feel my boobs – they feel foreign.

It’s okay to sometimes feel like things are different. They are different. We can’t hold ourselves to the old us because all through life we will change and morph into new women. I realized that this must be what it feels like to look in the mirror at 60, or try to run or when your metabolism just wasn’t like it once was and now you eat one piece of pizza and blow up. It all hit me. Is this real life? It may sound so silly and vain but seriously some people simply haven’t gotten there yet. Instead of me feeling like I need to catch up with others or feel sad that I’m not the same and other women get to feel hot … I just need to give myself a firm swat on the buns and say “listen up lady – you are a boss babe, the woman you were is still there but she has grown, she is strong, she understands life in a new way, she went through tough labor, she stayed in the hospital 5 days, she woke up all night and she cried, she wanted to be her old self but she also wanted to snuggle her baby with all her love, she birthed a new life, she is a mother, she is loved, she is valued and she is special beyond belief. Don’t you dare discount that. You are learning big things, and your mind and experience have went through something many women have not had the privilege of, and the challenge of.” Life is an experience and a gift. May we always remember that motherhood is nitty gritty, deep and emotional but ever so rewarding and we mature in massive ways.

To be honest… I still don’t feel like me. In some ways it’s coming around but in some ways I feel as though some parts of me will always stay. I will always feel my stretch marks and go “whoaaa that’s intense”. I will also think “hehe omg it’s so soft and cuddly”!

Let us give ourselves time, relax, live healthy and stay strong. ? You can do it ladies. We are the mama family.

Categories: Before Pregnancy, Belly, Body Image, Breasts, Cesarean, First Pregnancy, Positive Body Image/Words of Enouragement, Postpartum, Pregnant, Submissions

These Lines (Anonymous)

The marks from my firstborn holding my newest addition close. Sun soaking body positivity.

These lines don’t JUST tell the story of OUR journey together. Now, they hold the future of what WE will become within them.

Categories: Belly, Mom over 30, Positive Body Image/Words of Enouragement, Postpartum, Pregnant, Second Pregnancy, Submissions

A Brand New Profession

Hello from the other side of my first official tabling event! THANK YOU to those of you who donated to help get me here! Hello to all my new readers from BabyFest!

It was a fun day, connecting with other local birth workers. Everyone who stopped by the table was supportive of the concept and it was great to be able to share our message with more people. It was especially exciting to meet some of you who already knew about SOAM!

It’s taken me awhile to be able to post something here, and I apologize. My illnesses have been flaring and spending a day doing all that social work was a lot to process and recover from.

During the afternoon lull, while everyone stopped in at the Great Cloth Diaper Change, I had a moment to reflect on the morning and I was hit with a realization that’s left me equal parts excited and apprehensive: I’m not merely trying to start a business, I’m trying to create an entire profession. Obviously, I suppose I knew this on some level, but it wasn’t quite this clear, or this close to the surface. Knowing this, I’ll approach future tabling or public events differently, but I’m not exactly sure how. Perhaps a flier or brochure with more in-depth information? I don’t know. How does one find a way to create a whole profession? How do I find a place to fit in the birthing community (or, where do I fit outside the birthing community, because my work on body positivity does not begin or end with mothers)? I’m not sure of the answers to these questions. Perhaps I should have been a business major? haha

I am still moving forward with all the work we are currently doing, and I will continue to learn how to grow SOAM into something even more revolutionary. If you are local, consider booking a Body Positivity Party. If you believe in our mission at SOAM, consider becoming a patron – SOAM has helped thousands of women over the years, if only 250 people donated $5/month, we’d have over $1,200 a month to work with and everyone knows that starting a business (or profession!) costs.

Thank you, to my readers, to those who have submitted, to those who have contributed. You are what makes SOAM possible.

Categories: My Own Ramblings, News