Pregnancies/Children: 1
7 weeks Postpartum
Growing up I had self esteem issues and I struggled with an eating disorder up until I found out I was pregnant. When I found out I was pregnant everything changed, I knew I needed to care for myself for my child. My mother didn’t do a very good job teaching us to love ourselves as we were because she was always dieting and getting plastic surgeries (even though she is/was already thin and beautiful) I gained 52 pounds during my pregnancy and so far at 7 weeks postpartum I have lost 31. My husband thinks I am beautiful and I am learning to love myself as well. We want to have another child, hopefully a girl this time (we have a boy) and I want my children to grow up knowing they are beautiful as they are. The first picture is me 6 weeks pregnant. The rest are now at 7 weeks postpartum. I have stretch marks everywhere and a loose belly. My boobs got huge and saggy, I am breastfeeding and no matter how hard I try to increase supply in the left side, my right breast is still 2 cup sizes bigger. These bodily changes are what brought me to my beautiful baby boy and I wouldn’t change it for anything.
~Age: 22
~Number of pregnancies and births: 1/1
~The age of your children, or how far postpartum you are: 5.5 month old ds/5.5 months pp
As long as I can remember, I have struggled with body image issues. All throughout my school years, I was always the big/fat/chunky/chubby/amazon woman or what have you. I was 5’9″ and 210 at my heaviest. I have also struggled with anxiety and depression for most of my life. When I was 19, I went on a one month food cleanse/detox per my naturopath and 5 months later, I was down 70 pounds. I was now 5’10″ and 140-145 and felt and looked amazing, however at the time I still felt self conscious. I look back at pictures of what I used to look like and I just want to kick myself for wasting all that time hating a gorgeous person… Fast forward to November 10, 2011, I was 21 years old and via 3 week early induction and then emergency c-section due to pre eclampsia (at one point I gained over 20 pounds in one week from fluid), my son was born. He is my WORLD and has changed my mind and heart for the better… however, he also changed my body, completely and drastically. Due to stress, pre eclampsia and laziness, I gained over 100 pounds throughout my pregnancy. I stopped looking at the scale at the doctor’s office but I am now almost 6 months pp and 220 pounds, 80 pounds overweight. I don’t even feel like myself anymore, I can’t even look at myself in the mirror without feeling immense pain and grief. I don’t want to wear maternity jeans and sweatpants and huge tshirts all the time, I feel like a big bum and it doesn’t help my depression. I went from a size 3/5 jeans to not even being able to wear a 14; size small/medium shirts to large/xlarge. I have shopped in the plus sizes for the first time in my life. I am exclusively breastfeeding and not losing any weight! I’m even eating healthy, gluten/wheat/dairy free for my son. I just want to love myself for what I look like now. I don’t want to be worried that I’ll never find a man to love me. I want to feel comfortable in clothes and be a great positive example for my son. I just don’t want to be in pain when I think about my body. I haven’t even seen any other mom with stretch marks like mine, or who had the weight gain I had. I wouldn’t want to take anything back though, my baby boy is my entire world, I can’t imagine ever living without him and he completes me. Even though I feel ugly on the outside, I am a changed person on the inside. I love my mind now, and that has to count for something.
1. me at my lowest/healthiest weight
2. 17 weeks pregnant
3. 37 weeks pregnant
4. my beautiful son (5 months old)
5. 5.5 months pp front view
6. 5.5 months side view
7. me now at 220 pounds.
This site is so wonderful! A big thanks to the creator.. These stories have made me feel a lot better about my situation.. Knowing I’m not alone.
These photos are 11 months postpartum. I got pregnant with my first, a beautiful baby boy, at age 21. Being young, I assumed my body would bounce right back to it’s 105-110lb. figure with no effort on my part. I gained 40lbs. during my pregnancy and now, 11 months later — I am still about 10lbs. over my ideal weight and struggling with this and the belly flab/stretch marks. I am still breast feeding and plan to AT LEAST for another month. I got complimented in the first few months postpartum on how my tummy went flat so quickly–but to me it still wasn’t as it should be. These last 10lbs. I can’t seem to shake off… Any one think it may be from breast feeding? Will it be easier to lose once I wean??
Summer is approaching and I cannot see myself flaunting a bikini at the beach this year… Or ever again for that matter….
